Butterfly Boys

by Cameron James

  “Until you pulled him off?” Frankie asked, Skylar nodded then looked at Frankie as he wiped away their tears with his thumb.

  Oakley was in his own ward when Nurse Mitchell had come to find us to take up to see him. She had warned us the entire walk through the hospital that we wouldn’t recognise him as our Oakley, that he looked different, that it could be a shock.

  It being a shock was almost an understatement.

  He looked swollen, his face red raw and heavily stitched. It looked painful to touch. The stitches ran down his face in a winding line, they started just above his nose, in the middle of his forehead, then ran down his nose, about halfway, before changing direction and continuing under his eye, across his cheek. It, currently was the most prominent thing on his face, especially with the red outline, contrasting against his pale looking skin.

  “He looks sore.” Skylar said in a voice that was just below a whisper. They walked towards the bed, stroking their fingers down Oakley’s hand, touching each of his fingers individually. “I’m sorry.” They whispered as they lifted Oakley’s hand and kissed the back of it.

  “What?” Frankie said, then sighed, “what?” he asked Nurse Mitchell, she sighed as she checked his chart.

  “They’ve stitched his nose, which is broken and might need plastic surgery to fix, long term.”

  “Is that all?” I asked, Nurse Mitchell nodded.

  “Until he wakes up – which should be tomorrow – we can’t assess any further damage. You’re in for a long night boys.” She said softly, “I’ve also called Oakley’s parents. They said they were coming.” She said, we all nodded again as we continued to look at Oakley. “Only one of you can stay with him. The other of you can stay with Sky. Tonight, okay?”

  “Thank you.” I said, as Frankie sighed cuddling Skylar’s arm. “I’ll stay with Oakley.” I said softly. Frankie nodded, thanking me as he did then kissed the back of Oakley’s hand before following Nurse Mitchell and Skylar back to his ward.

  I woke up with a start, as I felt someone shaking my shoulder. I rubbed my eyes trying to work my way through the blurriness until I realised, I was looking up at Riley, as he stood his hand on my shoulder. His face tear stained but somehow, he looked ready for a fight. I looked from him, to Kieran who was stood beside the bed. His fingers stroking through Oakley’s hair.

  “Where you with him?” Riley asked as I stood from the chair, I’d fell asleep in. I shook my head.

  “I’m so sorry.” I said quickly, Riley sighed as he held my shoulders.

  “Don’t, don’t be sorry. You’re with him now. Was he with Sky?”

  “Sky.” I agreed. “They were just out. In gay town.” I said, then I shook my head. “I didn’t think things like this still happened.” I added as Kieran looked towards us. “I don’t know, I’ve heard about attacks, but…”

  “Was this because he’s gay?” Kieran asked, I didn’t commit to nodding. “Little shits.” Kieran almost growled as Riley walked around me, kissing the top of Oakley’s head.

  “My baby.” He whispered, I swallowed hard then turned towards the knock on the door. Frankie was stood in it looking lost.

  “Nurse Mitchell insisted I go home.” He said softly, “Sky’s Dad’s came. They’re with him. She suggested I go.”

  “That sounds like a good idea.” Riley said, I looked back towards him. “Go home. Sleep. Shower.” He said then nodded so I nodded back. “Thank you, both, so much.” He added.

  “We’ll be back tomorrow.” Frankie said, Riley nodded.

  “I know sweetheart. I know.” He said then looked down at Oakley again, sighing before looking at Kieran. “We’ve got him, don’t worry.” He said as he sat on the end of the bed. I nodded.

  “Goodnight.” I said softly, they both nodded.

  “Goodnight.” They repeated together, so I turned going towards Frankie, taking his hand and squeezing it before looking back into the room as Kieran wrapped his arms around Riley, kissing his head, whispering to him as Riley’s shoulders shook.

  “Can I come back to yours?” Frankie asked, I turned towards him, almost frowning. “Your Dads?”

  “Yes.” I whispered. “I think want to see my Dad too.”

  Dad’s hand stroked though my hair as he placed the breakfast bagel down in front of me. He sighed as he looked at me, then walked around the table. His hand stroking through Frankie’s hair before placing the second bagel down. He sat down between us, then he sighed. Frankie and I sighed with him, then we jumped all together when Frankie and my phone vibrated on the table top.

  “Go.” Dad said, I looked at him as he nodded. “Finish your bagel first, but go.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “You don’t want to be anywhere else right now. He’s your friend. Go be with him.” he nodded as I took a bite out of the bagel.

  “You sound like you’re talking from experience.” Frankie whispered; Dad sighed as he turned to look at him.

  “When I was on the gay scene, this was a regular occurrence.”

  “You were on the gay scene?” Frankie repeated almost amused; Dad smiled at him.

  “Yeah. I’m bi Frankie.” He said, Frankie smiled. “I started going out in gay town when I was fifteen. I had him at sixteen, but still visited on nights out. When his Mum left, sometimes I went to pull.”

  “You’re my idol.” Frankie said, Dad shook his head amused.

  “One of my friends, he was gay. He went out one night alone. I couldn’t get someone to look after him, our other friends all had blockers, so he went into town alone.” He sighed, “I got a call around three am from the hospital. I was his emergency contact. He’d been brought in hours before, he’d been attacked, by the man he’d met in the club. The man, had led him on, he’d invited him back, just to attack him.”

  “What happened?” I asked, then cleared my throat as Dad sighed.

  “It was pretty serious. His attacker hadn’t expected him to be found. He’d left him for dead. When I arrived. He’d been all stitched up. Bandaged and wrapped. He didn’t look like my friend. I stayed with him for as long as I could. My friends and I, we took it in turns.” He sighed. “He never came around.”

  “Really?” Frankie asked, Dad nodded.

  “He had a bleed on the brain. He passed away.”

  “I’m sorry.” I said, Dad nodded then he sighed.

  “It wasn’t okay, but I was okay because we were all there with him. We fully believed he knew how much we loved him, how much we wanted to look after him. We knew he wasn’t alone.” He sighed. “It won’t happen with Oakley. I’m sure of it. It’s been thirteen years, how healthcare has come on is astounding, just, don’t let him be alone.”

  ❋

  Chapter Eighteen

  Frankie and I sat either side of Oakley’s hospital bed. Speaking rarely to each other as we took it in turns to look at Oakley. He had regained some colour, for sure, his face, his skin definitely had more colour in it, and the stitches looked far less intense. He slept peacefully, the heart rate monitor beeping at a comforting rate in the background.

  Skylar had been sent home when we arrived. A sticky plaster on their head to protect the stitches but they were mostly okay. Their Dad’s had been given a long list of dos and don’ts regarding Sky’s head, and had happily taken them home to rest, promising they’d bring them back to see Oakley after they’d rested.

  Nurse Mitchell had come by. Telling us that everything was okay, and offering us both a juice, then, we sat, we just sat and kept him company.

  “I feel very caterpillar today.” Frankie whispered as he sat his knees to his chest on the super uncomfortable chair, watching Oakley. I turned to look at him as he stroked his knees.

  “Caterpillar.” I repeated, he nodded slowly then turned to look at me.

  “Cocoon might be more appropriate.”

  “Frankie.” I said, my voice weak as he shook his head.

  “They were just being themselves Sam. Oakley and Sky, they were out,
having fun just being themselves, and they were attacked for it.” he paused, “it’s terrifying.”

  “I know.” I whispered, he looked down. “But it doesn’t mean you have to hide your butterfly side.”

  “No. I appreciate that.” He said softly. “I’m just not feeling very, butterfly is all.” He said, so I looked my him my eyes travelling down him as he sat in my hoodie that I hadn’t yet gotten back from the festival in the summer, he wore it simply with denim jeans and a pair of black doc martens. He didn’t look like Frankie, but also somehow looked completely like Frankie, and that blew my mind.

  “He’ll be okay.” I said, Frankie sighed. “We know he will. Sky will be okay. You’ll be okay. This was done by a vile man who hid behind a mask. Which makes him a vile, scared boy.”

  “It wasn’t their fault.” Frankie whispered; I shook my head.

  “No, no at all.”

  “It could’ve been me.” he said, then he looked across to me, “if we’d met up with them. I was, I looked more… than they both did. It could’ve been me.”

  “It wasn’t.”

  “But it was Oakley.” He said then rubbed his eyes.

  “He’s strong, don’t worry.” Rory said, we both sat up as we turned towards the door where Rory was stood leaning on the doorframe, looking at Oakley. “He’s so strong.” He said as he came into the room, he walked towards the bed. Stroking over Oakley’s hair then sighing. “I know he doesn’t look like much.” He added, almost laughing, I smiled at him as Frankie did.

  “He always has been, since he was little. It was like the first day he walked into Nursery he knew he was different. He knew he was more sensitive; he knew he was… Oakley.” He almost sighed, “he knew he played with dolls when most of the other little boys played with trucks and tools. He knew that and he fought practically every day, he developed a hard skin, but never lost who he was. He’d fight, and fight then come home and I’d find him sat on the couch with Pa, one of his dolls wrapped up with him. Watching something brightly coloured and usually full of songs. Usually Trolls.” He said amused as he continued to stroke through Oakley’s hair.

  “Pa would tell him how much he loved him, how special he was, and how proud Pa was that he loved who he was. Every single night.” He sighed turning towards us. “Pa, Dad and me were over the moon when he met Sky. When he became friends with Sky. Then he met you.” He said nodding to Frankie, “and we were so relieved. We were so fucking relieved that he’d finally found people like him, people he could be himself with, people he could love, and love him.” He sighed.

  “He’ll always shout the loudest out of any of us, to defend himself, to stand up for what he believed in. He’ll fight, and fight. I regularly think about Mason.”

  “Mason?” I asked, Frankie gasped.

  “Oh my god I forgot about Mason.” He said, Rory nodded as Frankie looked at me. “Oakley loved Mason, really, really loved him for so, so long. He’d give Mason a sunflower every week from when he was about twelve. Mason liked him back, he just wouldn’t admit it.

  Mason had a lot of gay shame, so Oakley’s openness about it really unnerved him, but he must’ve finally admitted it, because they did sleep together. I think Mason was actually Oakley’s virginity.” He said turning to Rory who nodded slowly “But Mason essentially turned on him, calling him for all kinds, which Oakley stood up too, he argued back, until Mason called him something, I don’t think he ever told me the word Mason said to him, but Oakley walked out then and then. He didn’t turn back, he didn’t run back to Mason, he told him it was over.

  He left. He accepted Mason’s apology which came a few weeks later, but he never went back to him, and I admired him, so much because he’d loved him for four years, like he really, really loved him, but the moment he did him wrong, he didn’t go back.”

  “And now he’s with Sky.” I said, Frankie nodded as Rory laughed.

  “Are you serious?” Rory asked, I nodded as Rory smiled down at Oakley. “I knew it. Oh my god, I knew it. He never said, god he’s going to get an earful when he wakes up.” He said, we both laughed as he smiled then turned to us. “Go and get yourselves something to eat, drink. Air.” He said, then laughed. “I’m here with him, I’ll be here for the next hour or so.” He said,

  I nodded as Frankie sighed and stood, so I followed, slipping my arm around Frankie’s waist as we walked out of the room. “Thanks guys. By the way.” Rory said, so I turned to look at him as he pulled the seat a little closer to the bed.

  “Thank you.”

  ⦁

  Luca sat on the big visitor’s chair, with Skylar opposite him when I came in to Oakley’s room. His hands resting on a book as Skylar painted them a gorgeous shade of pink, which they’d both told me multiple times was watermelon pink. Rory sat on the other side a continuous state of quiet amusement at Luca babbled on to Skylar excitedly.

  “He’s going to be devastated when he wakes up.” Rory said in a sigh nodding to Oakley so I also did.

  “Loves a party.” I said amused, Rory laughed.

  “Definitely.” Rory said softly as he stroked the duvet flat, then he sighed. “I’m going to go and talk to his nurse. You two okay if I leave him?” he asked, I nodded as Skylar laughed.

  “Don’t worry, I’m pretty sure he won’t move a muscle.” they said as he continued to paint his nails. Rory nodded, squeezing my shoulder as he went past me.

  “Are you going tonight?” I asked, Skylar turned to look at me, sighing lightly and shaking their head.

  “I would’ve been.” they added, then looked back at Luca. “My head won’t allow me.” they added; Luca nodded.

  “I understand, don’t worry.” He said softly then looked towards Oakley. “Although I wish Oakley could come. He makes parties so much more fun.” He said, I smiled as I nodded.

  “It’s true. My eighteenth was hysterical once you guys arrived.” I said, Skylar laughed as they nodded.

  “I remember. Frankie sent us a text asking if we were coming and we kind of thought why not. We got there and you were just playing pool, so…” Skylar said, Luca turned to look back at them, “we decided to turn it up a few notches.”

  “That sounds like Oakley.” Luca said laughing, “when my Dad and Pa got married I spent the entire day with him, we had so much fun because we ran around the tables, he was taking the favours and Grandpa had given Connor and me a money box, so I was distracting everyone by showing them my box.” Luca paused as he laughed. “We made something like two hundred pounds because people just kept putting money in for me.” he smiled as Sky nodded. “He’s…” Luca said, Skylar almost frowned.

  “Luca?”

  “He’s going to be okay? Right?” he whispered; Skylar sighed as I closed my eyes. “I mean, I know we shouldn’t have favourites, but he’s definitely my favourite person in my family and I don’t know what I’d do… if he wasn’t okay.”

  “He’ll be okay” Skylar said, then frowned thoughtfully towards Oakley. “I’m pretty certain of that. Really he’s just broken his nose. Nothing else. Nothing too bad.”

  “Why is he still asleep then?” Luca whispered,

  “You know Oakley…” I said, Luca looked towards me. “Luca, you know how lazy he is.” I said, Luca laughed as he nodded.

  “That’s true.” He said softly, then turned towards Oakley as Rory came back in.

  “His Nurse says he should wake up soon. If not, they’ll look for underlining issues.” He sighed, walking around Oakley’s bed and kissing his forehead. “Come on Luca, let’s go and get ready for your party.” He said, Luca nodded then hugged Skylar’s neck.

  “Thank you Sky they’re gorgeous.”

  “Any time, you’re one of my better customers.” They said, as they stood, collecting their nail polishes back into the box. They turned to me as Rory and Luca left. They sighed lightly; I also did. “Did you believe me?”

  “Did you believe yourself?” I asked almost wincing as Skylar nodded slowly.

  �
��He’ll be fine.” They said in a sigh, then stroked over Oakley’s hand. “I truly believe that. I don’t know why he hasn’t woken up yet, but I know he will.” They rubbed their eyes.

  “What are you doing tonight Sky?”

  “Chinese. Netflix.” They nodded. “Wrapped up in a big blanket. Is Frankie coming?”

  “He’s on his way.” I said lightly, Skylar nodded kissing Oakley’s cheek then coming to me, hugging me and kissing my cheek.

  I was almost falling asleep on the chair as Frankie and I sat fulfilling our shift after taking over from Skylar. We hadn’t spoke, not really, although we had been playing an extremely lazy game of, I Spy for what felt like hours. Our conversation had lulled and I had begun to seriously consider calling in sick for my shift tomorrow morning as I fell in and out of sleep in the chair.

  “We should’ve gone with them.” Frankie said, in a sigh so I woke up, looking at him and frowning, he shook his head. “Sorry, sorry I just… if we’d all gone to RC, then out, then…”

  “You can’t keep thinking like this.” I said, as I wiggled about in the chair until I was more comfortable.

  “I don’t know, I just keep thinking of what ifs.”

  “They won’t get us anywhere.”

  “It’s been four days Sam. What if he doesn’t wake up?”

  “He will.” I said nodding, “I’m sure of it.” I added, he sighed as he nodded and rubbed his forehead, pulling my hoodie sleeves over his hands and resting his nose on them.

  “Why didn’t we go with them?” he muttered into my sleeves. I looked at him as he sighed, I sighed back.

  “Because I was asking you on a date.” I said, he frowned then looked up and at me.

  “What?”

  “Yeah.” I muttered then looked back towards Oakley. “But I get it, you don’t feel the same way, so we went as friends, I guess. We could’ve gone to RC’s party. Actually. Should’ve.” I said,

  “Sam.” He said, I shook my head, “Sam, no look at me.” he said, I shook my head again because I noticed the change in Oakley’s breathing.

  He took two breaths in, then he exhaled deeply, almost as if it was thought about, so I watched him. I watched as his breaths got deeper and longer, until he coughed, so I stood, I stood and took a hold of his hand, feeling his fingers brushing against the palm of my hand. He was waking up, it was the only explanation, it had to be. I looked at his various monitors, nothing had changed on them, his heart beat was still regular, none of the numbers had changed, then he grabbed my hand, so I turned to look back at him, as Frankie stood on the other side, taking hold of his other hand.