A. Warren Merkey

by Far Freedom

  ” You shouldn’t have called Security.”

  “I did tell her that!” Aylis called from behind the screen.

  “Why not? I don’t understand!”

  “Is she badly hurt?” She could tell Jon was even more upset, yet he seemed reluctant to take charge of the situation and do the right thing. What was wrong with him?

  ” She could barely speak when I found her!”

  “We can hear her very well now.”

  ” She’s trying to deny what happened to her. I think it’s serious!”

  “Don’t tell me you haven’t seen worse on Earth,” Aylis argued. Mai could hear her voice quaver.

  “This isn’t Earth! And this is you!”

  “Captain, perhaps you can make her obey,” Aylis spoke more calmly. “I can’t.”

  “Unlikely,” Jon said. “Been there, done that. She’s one of yours, not one of mine.”

  “Why shouldn’t I have called Security?” Mai asked again.

  “It isn’t something we should discuss now,” Jon replied.

  “But this is a serious crime!” Mai wanted to hit Jon for being so derelict in duty! “We may have the evidence to convict her attacker. If I can collect it.”

  Admiral Demba arrived, followed closely by a tall, striking woman wearing gym clothes and a towel draped around her neck. Mai hoped the woman was Security - she looked fierce. She saw Sammy follow them into the hospital room on his crutches. Mai didn’t want Sammy here, wanted to protect him from knowing what happened to Aylis. She looked from Demba to Sammy to Horss, hoping someone else would share her concern, but gave up. How she hated the Navy, and how justified she was!

  “Admiral.” Jon greeted Demba and cast an odd look at the woman in gym clothes.

  “Captain.” The woman saluted. “I’m Lieutenant. Jones, Chief of Security.”

  “I know who you are. We don’t need you here. There’ll be no charges filed.”

  “There will. You can’t stop it, sir.”

  “Assault must be prosecuted, Jon,” Demba agreed.

  “I wish we could. Go see who it is. Stay here, Sammy. You, too, Lieutenant.”

  “Sir, you are interfering with a mandatory investigation.” The big woman’s voice was hard and she showed no concern for Jon’s rank. Mai almost enjoyed it.

  “Just be patient, Jones, I know that isn’t your best trait, so there are two of us who will restrain you if we must.”

  “How do you know me, sir?” The sweaty woman moved from one side of Jon to the other as he blocked her way in front of the privacy screen.

  “Many years ago we served on the same ship. Everybody on the ship knew who you were. Very few knew who I was.”

  Demba went behind the screen. Mai caught Sammy by the shoulder before he could follow her. She watched the woman and Jon stare at each other, until they heard Demba say, “Oh, God!”

  “Do you want us to leave?” Jon asked.

  “No,” Demba replied. “Come here.”

  “All of us?”

  “Yes. Lieutenant Jones, can you record this?”

  She was a Marine, Mai thought, seeing an insignia on her tee-shirt. She came around the screen first, pushing past Mai without apology. Good! Now something would get done!

  “Admiral, I’ve prosecuted many assault cases. I’m recording.”

  “Admiral, don’t,” Jon warned.

  Demba looked at Jon, appraised his seriousness, and heeded his advice. Mai was shocked by this inexplicable event. “Stop recording,” Demba ordered the Marine, blocking her view of Aylis.

  “That is an illegal order,” the Marine argued.

  “There are special circumstances. Stop or I’ll put you off the ship right now.”

  “Yes, sir. I’ve stopped.”

  Mai had hoped the Marine Security officer would prevail. Now she was just a big smelly obstacle in the crowded room. But she could sense the woman was at least as provoked as Mai was. It wasn’t over yet. The victim could not stop the prosecution of assault, Mai was sure of that.

  Demba moved aside to allow the Marine to see Aylis. Why bother now? Mai thought. The big woman saw the bruises on Aylis’s face and arms. She saw the torn clothing. She started to lift the edge of the drape over the lower part of Aylis’s body and the admiral stopped her.

  “You’re recording, aren’t you?” Demba asked.

  “I might be,” the Marine admitted. “She could change her mind later. Who is she? What happened? Who did it?” She asked the questions with severity, demanding answers.

  “I told you about her, Admiral,” Jon said, meaning the lieutenant. “Want me to take her away?”

  “You were raped, weren’t you?” the Marine asked Aylis, almost accusingly, ignoring her superior officers.

  Mai was shocked by what the woman asked, and was further shocked when Aylis didn’t deny it. She suspected rape, she fervently hoped it didn’t occur, and now she was greatly upset it did. She was even angry with Aylis for trying to hide the truth from her. What was going on? Mai saw that Jon was further upset by the revelation. Good - but he wasn’t doing anything about it! Demba’s expression changed for the worse, yet she withheld any proper response to the moral and legal requirements of the situation. What could Jon have conveyed to her in so few words?

  Demba looked at Jon again. “Are you sure?” He nodded his reply. It was maddening to Mai, insufferable! “Aylis? You don’t want to prosecute?”

  Aylis shook her head no, lying back, tired. Aylis was a great person, deserving of all the honor and fame, but she seemed to shrink now. She was a mere mortal, a victim of an ancient and still too common act of violence. Mai was sorry for her. Mai was hardened to rape cases, but this one made her sick to her stomach. The Navy was far worse than she ever suspected!

  “You know that according to Navy law we don’t need your permission to prosecute,” Demba said.

  “You couldn’t prosecute him without medical evidence I won’t give you. It’s impossible to prosecute him, evidence or not.”

  “It would be inconvenient.”

  “Yes.”

  “Inconvenient!” the Marine shouted, making Sammy jump next to Mai.

  Demba ignored the Security officer. “Is it who I think it is?” Demba asked Jon.

  “Yes, Admiral. She notified me before her departure. I thought I knew him, but I see I didn’t.”

  “You allowed her?”

  ” She’s Aylis Mnro. How should I have stopped her?”

  “I would have locked her up! You’re the captain of the ship! You can issue an order to any crew member - including admirals - and expect it to be obeyed!”

  Mai saw Jon flinch at the tone of Demba’s voice and his reaction was satisfying to her.

  “She’s Aylis Mnro?” the big woman asked, looking again at Aylis. “The Aylis Mnro?” Mai watched the Security officer battle with feelings of both awe and anger. The anger won. The woman pushed Demba aside and moved closer to Aylis. Demba inserted herself between them again. She wasn’t sure, but Mai felt this action was extraordinary, even as rough as Navy life must be. Jon moved to help Demba but she waved him off. Mai backed away and placed herself protectively beside Sammy, with a hand on his shoulder. She was a little apprehensive, considering the size and demeanor of the lieutenant.

  “Jones, listen to me!” Demba ordered, looking up at the woman from too close. “Let it go! You don’t know what we know, and we don’t want to explain it to you now!”

  “Rape is rape, sir!” The lieutenant was deadly serious. “I know what it feels like!”

  Demba opened her mouth, closed it, stared at the Marine’s face with concern for her. “I’m sorry!” Demba looked very sad.

  “You were—!” Aylis tried to say.

  “Never mind about me!” the lieutenant shouted. “I’ve lived a risky life! You can’t let this go unpunished! Tell me who did it!”

  “I can’t! Please. You can’t prosecute him. It’s impossible.”

  “Just tell me his name! I’ll k
ill the son of a bitch!”

  The woman was wonderful, Mai thought. She was almost quivering with rage. Jon was standing there with a look of awe, while Demba was still stuck between the big woman and Aylis.

  “I believe you would,” Aylis said in the calmest voice Mai yet heard from her. “Thank you for your concern. I’m sorry I can’t allow you to seek justice for me. What is your name?”

  “Jones, ma’am. Lieutenant Jamie Jones, Union Marines.”

  “Is this Jamie?” Aylis seemed surprised. She was questioning Demba but looking at the Security officer.

  “Why did you go to him?” Demba asked, ignoring Aylis’s strange question, nudging the lieutenant away from Aylis.

  “Go to whom?” Jones persisted.

  “I made a deal with the devil,” Aylis replied. “Maybe it was worth it, maybe not.”

  “I would never have expected this,” Demba said.

  “I knew it was dangerous.” Aylis looked from Jones to Demba. “Is this

  Jamie?” Aylis asked the strange question again in a very serious voice. Some reply came to Aylis from the expression on Demba’s face. Aylis reacted in renewed distress.

  “Are you really Doctor Mnro?” Jones asked.

  Aylis lost the small measure of calmness she had attained. She broke down and wept without restraint, curling up in the sheet which covered her. Demba held Aylis close and looked at the others in the room, conveying the message that they should leave.

  Jon attempted to pull Lieutenant Jones away and she resisted, until he looked at her with a very caring expression and silently mouthed the word please.

  “I’m filing a report!” Jones declared in an angry whisper, allowing Jon to escort her away.

  Mai was devastated by Aylis Mnro being reduced to the weeping, battered woman she now observed. When Sammy asked her what was wrong with her, Mai became even more upset.

  They wouldn’t answer her questions! They wouldn’t explain anything! Marine Lieutenant Jamie Jones was prevented from doing her duty. She felt angrier than in years, in decades. The anger was real and reasonable and she relished it, but it was tempered by the mystery behind everything. Why did they tolerate such a crime? Why did they tolerate her? Was it Aylis Mnro? The victim couldn’t be Aylis Mnro! That would make the crime even more terrible, something to be recorded in history texts. Yet only the civilian physician wanted to seek justice. It couldn’t be Aylis Mnro! Mnro was an historic person. Why would she even be on this ship?

  “Is this Jamie?” Is who Jamie? Was she Jamie? Whose Jamie? Who was Sammy and how did he suffer such an injury? Why would the admiral be his guardian? Why would Admiral Demba have such a close friendship with the most famous woman in history? Why did the admiral affect Jamie so strongly, awakening feelings she thought were long lost to the years and to the vanity of staying alive? Why was she so desperate to be a good Marine, desperate to do her duty, desperate to stay on this doomed ship? Why did she want to believe all of what was unbelievable?

  Section 004 Sons Remembered, Mai Retained

  Aylis slept. Perhaps she dreamed.

  Always the coward.

  Always the terror of my life.

  It isn’t my choice.

  It is your choice.

  It’s yours: you or her.

  Not her. Never!

  You ‘re the best and bravest of all of us.

  Remember that. Remember me.

  I’ll try.

  No tears?

  None to keep me from seeing you clearly for the last time. But from the next moment on.

  She looked upon his face with a great swelling of love for her best son, followed too soon by a flood of anguish that threatened to destroy her. The tears came, and through them she saw… a dark face with stripes and glowing eyes!

  She screamed, or thought she did. She awoke, or thought she did. Only words and emotions, but the fragment assaulted her with a force that could have spilled her blood. Fear pushed it into the dark, where it would wait for her. Another fragment began.

  “Always the coward.”

  “What did you say, Mother?”

  “Always the coward. I’m always so cowardly.”

  “You did what had to be done.”

  “I can’t finish it! She’s in there crying her heart out, begging to have her mother back. I can’t face her!”

  “I’ll take care of her, Mother.”

  “You will? Yes, I suppose you’re suited for it. But I’ll never want to believe you’re a cruel person.”

  “It’s a cruel thing to do.”

  “And now I’m losing you, too. I may never see you again.”

  “It’s no great loss to you. I’ve always disappointed you.”

  “Is that bitterness I hear?”

  “Not at all, Mother. It’s perfectly understandable. What I don’t understand is why you could love my father and not me.”

  “Perhaps I don’t like you very much, but I’ll always love you.”

  “We’ll end on that, Mother. I hope we meet again someday, to continue our difficult relationship.” He turned and opened the door, allowing the weeping of a child to be heard. He walked through the doorway, the door closed, but she could still hear the child. She would hear her forever.

  “Dare I translate that last sentence,” she said to herself, “to mean that he does have feelings for me?”

  “You.”

  “I.”

  “Go away.” He began to fade. “No! Wait. Why are you here?”

  ” You’re my mother. You were hurt.” “You care?”

  “Yes.”

  “Because it’s your duty, by definition.”

  “Yes. And no.”

  “I’ll take what little you can give.” Aylis sat up on the edge of her office sofa. She was pleased her son came to see her, but she wouldn’t reveal such emotion to him. That was a stupid response, regretted instantly! It seemed a century or two meant nothing to her feelings for her son. The feelings were still there, still as strong as ever, and still painful. It was so long ago, and yet he seemed the same Direk. She experienced a moment in which she felt acutely how old she was. He should have seemed a stranger to her after decades apart from her. Perhaps he was always a stranger, and so he seemed the same. “Did you touch me?”

  “No.”

  ” I just remembered you. When you took care of Jamie for me.”

  “I remember it.”

  “What did you do with her?”

  “I took her to live with her grandparents.”

  “You didn’t put her in stasis?”

  “No.”

  ” She doesn’t remember her real mother. What did you do to her?”

  “Perhaps you don’t remember what you did to her,” Direk said. “When she was about ten years old she got sick. She was taken to a Mnro Clinic.”

  “I don’t remember,” Aylis said sadly. “I probably should not want to remember. Does she have your auxiliary memory implants, like the rest of us? I almost touched her.”

  “It isn’t your touch that will unlock her memories.”

  “Yours?” She received a nod. “Why did you take her to her grandparents? Why didn’t you put her in stasis?”

  “I couldn’t.”

  She paused and considered these unexpected replies. She tried to assign a preferred significance to them - that Direk had changed to a normal Earthian human. It was too improbable. It was wishful thinking, another defective thought process to lead her down the wrong path, to get her hurt again. If only he didn’t have those same ice-pale Essiin eyes!

  Aylis stood up and approached her son. Direk stood in shadow it seemed, even though her office was evenly illuminated. She lifted a trembling hand to his shoulder and pulled them together. She kissed him on the cheek. She looked up into his cold eyes and frowned with concern. “Have you ever been happy?”

  “Yes.”

  She was again surprised at his reply: simple, straightforward - true? “There was a time when you couldn’t have answered that quest
ion. Have you changed?”

  “There was a time when you couldn’t have accepted any answer of mine concerning emotions. Have you changed?”

  “You had many dealings over the years with my copy. She’s inside my head now, asking me why I wanted an Essiin husband and not an Essiin son. I’ll accept your answer that you were happy. We won’t discuss further the illogic of happiness. Thank you for coming to see me. I’ve recovered from my injuries.”

  “Will you tell me what happened?”

  “No!” But she was almost thrilled he asked. “What would you do about it, if I

  244 Far Freedom told you?”

  “Don’t tell me. It hurts you.”

  “I thought my control was better. I do try to control myself for your sake.”

  “I’ll leave now.”

  Why did she hope so fervently? Why were these issues concerning her Essiin son not buried forever under the detritus of her ancient past? “I dreamed of you, Son: a stupid fantasy in which I told you who did what to me, and you took revenge.”

  He said nothing but continued to stare at her. She couldn’t see him well enough to search for some favorable meaning in his highly controlled expression. She turned away, ashamed to display her weakness to her son, and hating that he was so like a pale version of Admiral Etrhnk.

  “I’ll leave you now, Mother,” he said softly.

  She turned back quickly but Direk had faded from view. She would have wondered how he did that, and why, but her thoughts were too furiously tangled to give it much attention. She went to the doorway and looked for him in the hall but saw no one. She touched her lips and wondered if she had kissed him.

  Aylis continued into the hallway of her new Navy hospital aboard the Freedom. She located Sugai Mai through her shiplink and reached her quarters in a few moments.

  Mai had accepted Aylis’s invitation to visit her on the Freedom and to provide expertise on setting up trauma services. Mai knew permanent assignment was an option, as a civilian contractor. Mai didn’t want regular living quarters and asked for temporary quarters in the hospital, obviously discounting the option to serve out the Mission. Still, Aylis thought Mai could be persuaded to remain with the ship. Aylis felt the need of her friendship. She missed Ramadhal and all her friends on the moon.