Midnight's Master

by Donna Grant

  Gwynn screamed Logan’s name as she felt another climax take her, consume her as waves of pleasure engulfed her. She was falling into an abyss of contentment she never wanted to rise from.

  Her body well used, Gwynn found herself smiling as Logan slid out of her. He pulled her with him as he fell to his side. She readily snuggled against his warmth as he spread a blanket over them.

  With the fire crackling, the sea wind howling outside, and Logan’s chest beneath her cheek, Gwynn had never been happier.

  “Tell me of your life before coming to Scotland,” Logan asked.

  Gwynn chuckled. “I’m not sure I can form a coherent thought after what you just did to me.”

  “Aye. And the night is just beginning.”

  She heard the smile in his voice and laughed. “What do you want to know?”

  “Everything.”

  “I already told you about my parents. I didn’t have any siblings, nor was there any other family around. I finished high school, went to college, and got a degree in general business because I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life or what career I wanted.”

  “Career?”

  She nodded. “Yep. In order to have money, one has to work. It’d be nice to make money at something you enjoy, but that rarely happens. So, I went to work for a small property management company as their manager. It’s decent money, but not exactly what I wanted to do with my life.”

  “What did you want to do?”

  She sighed and glanced up at him. He had one arm around her and the other was bent beneath his head. “I don’t know,” she admitted.

  “Nothing?”

  “Well, I always wanted to travel. There’s so much of the world I’d like to see and learn. I had always envisioned my first stop to be Scotland,” she said with a laugh.

  His fingers caressed up and down her back. “Because of your family.”

  “No, just because I always found it fascinating. I wanted to see every castle.”

  “Tell me more about your life,” he said when she paused.

  “There’s nothing to tell. I had a cat I adored. I got her when she was just six weeks old and kept her until she died at age seventeen. She was so loving, always purring when I petted her. And she’d drool when she purred.”

  Logan chuckled. “What was her name?”

  “Sheba. You’ve never seen such bright blue eyes as this cat had. The sweetest thing, too.”

  “When did she die?”

  “Last year.”

  “You didna get another animal?”

  Gwynn shrugged. “I wasn’t ready. Enough about me. I want to know more about your life before and after you turned immortal. I imagine you have some great stories.”

  He was quiet so long Gwynn didn’t think he would answer. She shifted so that she rested her chin on his chest and looked at him.

  “Logan? What is it?”

  His hazel eyes looked from the fire to her. “Do you really want to know?”

  “Yes.”

  “You will regret it, Gwynn.”

  She reached over and ran her fingers through the hair at his temple. “I know you keep some secret or deed or something deep inside you. It shows sometimes, despite your smiles. It’s a darkness that cannot be hidden.”

  “A darkness. That’s an appropriate name for it.”

  Gwynn bit her lip and waited. Logan’s gaze slid back to the fire.

  “My family was poor, but then most were at the time. My father worked hard, as did my mother. I caught the laird’s eye with my archery skills, and soon I was training with his soldiers. My younger brother, Ronald, wanted to follow in my footsteps. He idolized me, followed me everywhere.”

  “You two were close, then?”

  “Aye. Verra close. He was six years younger, so it was my duty to keep him out of trouble. Ronald was always more cautious than I. Yet he never backed away from any challenge.”

  Gwynn smiled at the joy she heard in Logan’s words.

  “I became the best warrior of my clan,” Logan continued. “No one could best me, no’ even my laird. Just because I was someone important to my laird, I foolishly thought everyone else would think the same thing.”

  He paused for a moment. “I remember the first time I heard Deirdre’s name. Fear and uncertainty were connected to her name. And each time it was spoken, the fear grew and the uncertainty continued.”

  Gwynn’s heart began to thud painfully slow in her chest. Logan’s jaw clenched, and his hand on her back fisted.

  “I had heard the tales of the MacLeods and what she had supposedly done. But instead of fearing her as others did, I only saw the power she held. I had made a name for myself in my clan as a warrior, so I decided to find this woman.”

  Gwynn’s heart ached at the distress she heard in his words. She could well imagine him as a laird’s favorite warrior.

  “I thought I was meant for more than what I had been given in life. I wasna nobility, but I hungered for the riches, the land, and the titles. I knew I had the sword arm to prove myself, but I had nothing else. My laird assured me I would never want for anything as the commander of his men, but it wasn’t enough for me. I had won enough battles and one-on-one attacks to think I was invincible.”

  Her arms squeezed him. How could he berate himself for things most people thought? No matter how much she wanted to tell him that, she wouldn’t interrupt his tale.

  “I recall the horrified looks on my parents’ faces when I told them I was going to Deirdre. They desperately tried to talk me out of it, but I refused to listen. In my mind, Deirdre had the wherewithal to give me what I wanted most.”

  His fingers laced with hers, but he wouldn’t meet her eyes. Gwynn let her magic surround him, showing him that she was with him.

  “Leaving behind my parents, my laird, and my clan was difficult,” he continued. “But it was nothing like leaving behind my brother. Ronald didna understand why I was leaving. He followed me into the night, calling my name over and over and begging me to come back or take him with me.”

  Gwynn blinked away the tears that gathered in her eyes at the agony in Logan’s voice.

  “He wouldna stop calling my name. I could hear him crying, his young mind no’ able to understand where I was going or why. My parents finally intervened. The worst part is, I never looked back. I never went to him and told him farewell. He worshipped me, Gwynn, and I left him standing in the dark crying.”

  She didn’t brush away the tears that fell down her face. If Logan wouldn’t shed the tears himself, she would do it for him.

  After a moment, Logan said, “I never stopped, never considered my decision to go to Deirdre foolish. Until I reached Cairn Toul. It was majestic. But as I stood on that mountain, I could hear Ronald’s voice in my head begging me to come back. Just as I was turning around to do so, there was suddenly an entrance into the mountain that hadna been there before.

  “I forgot my brother as I thought of the life I could have. I hesitated but a moment before I walked inside. It was so dark, so cold, but all I could think about was the magic I’d heard whispered over the land about Deirdre. I was prepared to do anything to have her give me what I wanted.”

  Gwynn’s heart clenched in dread at the words which would come next.

  “Of course I’d heard about the Warriors. Who in Scotland hadna? So when I was granted an audience with her I suggested she see if I had a god inside me. I thought it the best way to get what I wanted. It was said the Warriors were the best fighters, so I assumed I had a chance.

  “As I gazed at her unnaturally long, white hair and eerie white eyes, I didna sense the evil within her. I was blinded by my greed.”

  Her tears came faster because she knew what she was hearing, Logan had never told another soul. And now she knew why.

  He took a steadying breath and forged ahead. “She didna want to even try to see if I had a god. She looked me over and said I wasna worth anything. I, of course, laughed. I had no idea what I was getting myself
into, nor did I care.

  “In response, she raised her hand and four men stepped out of the shadows. They were no’ Warriors, but by the vacant look in their eyes, I knew they’d been prisoners. Still, it didna stop me from my intent.”

  Once more Gwynn let her magic surround and comfort him. To her joy, he didn’t question it, just accepted it.

  “I fought them,” he continued. “They were rabid, crazed. But I was skilled and in my right mind. It didna take me long to end them. I proudly displayed the kills to Deirdre, telling her it wouldna hurt to see if I had a god. It never occurred to me that if I didna she wouldna let me go.

  “To my amazement, I did have a god inside me. When she said those words in a language I didna understand, I had never felt such pain in my life. Every bone in my body snapped in two. My muscles were pulled apart and my arms wrenched from their sockets. But that was nothing compared to the feel of Athleus rising inside me.”

  Gwynn rubbed her cheek against his chest while she waited for Logan to finish.

  “I tried to hold back my bellows of pain, but in the end it was too much. Even through the haze of agony I heard Deirdre’s laughter. I hear it still.”

  His head turned and he locked his gaze with hers. “Athleus is the god of betrayal. Ironic, is it no’? Now you know the secret I have kept from everyone, the deed I will do anything to atone for.”

  CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

  Logan waited for Gwynn to condemn him, waited for her to jump away from him with contempt on her beautiful face.

  Instead, she laid her hand over his heart and smiled softly. “You made a mistake, Logan.”

  “It was more than a mistake.”

  “If you want to feel guilty because you went to Deirdre, then I cannot stop you. In the end, it was just a matter of time before she found you herself.”

  He scoffed at her words.

  “Fine,” she said with a firm set of her lips. “What happened after she unbound your god?”

  “When a god is unbound, his rage is vast. Many men can no’ withstand the onslaught of the anger and the ferocious need to kill. They fall to their god. Sometimes, I wonder if that would have been easier than seeing firsthand what I had given myself to.

  “Between the screams of the dying Druids and the tortured men, Cairn Toul became my Hell. Deirdre thought that because I had come to her I would do what she said. Though I had been naïve and stupid, I realized as soon as I felt Athleus that I had to make a decision. So, I fought him.”

  “And Deirdre?” Gwynn whispered.

  He closed his eyes and tried to keep her from seeing his anguish. “Aye, I fought her. She locked me in the dungeon and tortured me for months. She threatened my family, but I knew to save them I had to act as though I didna care.”

  “Did she harm them?”

  He shrugged. “I doona know. By the time I escaped and returned to them, there was nothing left. No one knew of them or what had happened. Ever since escaping Deirdre, I’ve done everything in my power to fight her.”

  He waited for Gwynn to say something, anything, but only silence filled the air. He wasn’t surprised. She had wanted to know the awful, sordid details of his past. Now that she knew the truth, it was only a matter of time before everything sunk in and she shut him out of her life.

  And he couldn’t blame her. Not after what he had done. He didn’t deserve to know the heavenly taste of her kisses. Nor did he deserve to have men call him brother, men who would risk their lives for him.

  Logan had seen the shock and fury in Duncan’s eyes when Deirdre had told him. It was why Logan had never told anyone, not even Hayden. He couldn’t bear to lose the only family he had.

  “Logan, look at me,” Gwynn demanded.

  Unable to help himself, he looked down into her beautiful face, her lovely violet eyes. “You doona need to say anything. I know how you feel.”

  “Actually, you don’t. You honor me by telling a story you have kept to yourself all these years.”

  Honor? He had burdened her with a tale of greed and foolishness that should never be repeated.

  “Everyone makes mistakes. You are making up for yours now. You have been, ever since you decided to fight Deirdre. You found the MacLeods. You’ve been fighting against her and her evil for decades, Logan. That more than makes up for going to her.”

  “Doona try to make me look like a hero, Gwynn. The other Warriors at MacLeod Castle were all taken against their will. Their families were killed by Deirdre. How do you think they will look at me when they discover I willingly went to Deirdre? Only her death will atone me of my sin.”

  Gwynn released a long sigh. “You think the others will be angry about this, don’t you?”

  “I think they’ll hate me,” he answered. It was the first time he had admitted it aloud, and he didn’t like how badly it hurt to say it. “I betrayed them.”

  “If you betrayed anyone, Logan, it was yourself. But I wouldn’t even say that. You left your family and your little brother. I understand the guilt over that. Did you go to war with other clans?”

  “Aye.”

  “How is that any different from leaving to seek Deirdre? You could have been killed in one of those battles.”

  Logan squeezed his eyes closed and shook his head. “You are looking for ways to absolve me.”

  “No. I’m pointing out facts you’ve refused to see. That darkness inside you is eating you alive. It’s destroying the man you really are. You’ve kept it buried deep, and its driven you in your decisions.”

  Logan looked at the ceiling. “You didna see Duncan’s face when Deirdre told him what I did, Gwynn. There was anger, aye, but also disdain.”

  “What you did, and do, have control over is your decision to fight against Deirdre. That tells me all I need to know of the man you are, Logan Hamilton.”

  Logan’s chest tightened. Could it really be as simple as Gwynn made it sound? Had he really carried the guilt for nothing?

  Her small fingers touched his chin and gently turned his head until his eyes met her violet ones. She smiled and kissed him.

  “You will kill Deirdre,” she said. “We all will.”

  Logan kissed her forehead as she snuggled under the covers. “You’re an amazing woman, Gwynn.”

  “Nope. Just one who can see things much clearer than you.”

  Logan found himself smiling, the guilt he’d shouldered for so long lighter than it had been in ages. It wasn’t gone, nor would it disappear until Deirdre was dead.

  But Gwynn had helped him. Logan’s eyes closed, the smile still in place.

  * * *

  Gwynn woke several hours later to find the fire dying. She crawled out from under the blanket, careful not to wake Logan, and added more wood to the fire.

  She rubbed her hands over her icy skin and dug out some sweats and two pairs of socks from her bag. The castle had been modernized, but there were still drafts.

  Once her teeth stopped chattering, Gwynn sat before the fire with the Book of Craigan in her lap. She had a perfect view of Logan just by lifting her eyes, and though she’d like nothing more than to stay curled up by his side, she had to learn the secrets of the book.

  Gwynn felt the pull of the book’s magic calling to hers. She opened the thick cover and flipped to the page she had been reading.

  The surge of pleasure she felt from the book brought a smile to her face. It seemed to recognize her, to sense she was the Keeper.

  Gwynn began to read, becoming absorbed in the words and history of the book. The more she read, the quicker the words came until she was reading faster than she could turn the pages.

  Everything about the Druids of Eigg from the time the Tablet of Orn came to the isle until two hundred years ago was in the book.

  When Gwynn reached the end, tears welled in her eyes as she read how it became harder and harder for the Druids to hide their magic when they were all together.

  Gwynn turned the last page and closed the cover. When she looked up the fire wa
s roaring and Logan was sitting across from her with a pair of jeans on, unbuttoned, and nothing else.

  “I woke to find you reading,” he said.

  She wiped at her eyes. “Did you try and stop me?”

  He shook his head. “I was no’ going to leave you though.”

  “I know.” She set aside the book and put her hand on the cover. “I read it all. Every page. I know why the Druids aren’t on Eigg anymore.”

  “Why?”

  “Their magic was too powerful when they were together. People started to get suspicious and ask too many questions. So the Druids began to leave the isle. I don’t think they all meant to leave, but over the years it happened.”

  Logan poked at the fire. “Aye, I can see that. The Druids are private people. They doona like others interfering. To protect themselves and their magic, they had to take precautions.”

  “And with Deirdre no longer around, they thought they were safe.”

  “Precisely.”

  Gwynn moved her feet closer to the fire to help thaw her toes. “You’ve not asked me about the Tablet.”

  Logan shrugged and smiled at her. “I knew you would tell me when you wanted to.”

  “So much faith in me,” she said with a grin.

  “It’s well deserved.”

  She’d been joking, but Logan wasn’t. She saw it in the way his eyes held hers. His hand came down on hers and his thumb caressed her skin.

  She was in way over her head. This was the time she knew she should pull back from Logan to protect herself and her heart, but she couldn’t find the will.

  And it might already be too late for her heart.

  There were feelings growing for Logan, and she was afraid those feelings could very well be love. Instead of making her run, it made her … stronger.

  “Do you remember how I was pulled to that place on Eigg?” she asked.

  Logan nodded. “Of course. Is that where it’s at?”

  “Kinda. It’s under the isle.”

  “Under?” he repeated with a frown, his honey-colored hair falling forward as he leaned toward her.

  Gwynn turned her hand over and linked her fingers with his. “Yes. There are caves all over the isle. This one leads deep beneath the isle.”