Blurry: A Student Teacher, Age Gap Romance

by Michelle Hercules

  “Thanks, Phillip. I’ll miss DuBose for sure.”

  “What are you going to do now?” he asks.

  “Figure out how to fix my life.”

  “You really should go after Chiara. After what your ex-wife did to her, she’s probably feeling like shit.”

  “Nadine will get what’s coming to her,” I state matter-of-factly. “As for going after Chiara, I have to tie up some loose ends here first.”

  Phillip narrows his eyes at me. It seems my answer wasn’t what he wanted to hear. I wish I could just drop everything and go after Chiara, but I can’t leave my parents alone to deal with the aftermath of the fire, and I also have to make sure Nadine doesn’t have another nasty surprise waiting for me.

  44

  Chiara

  I knew my mother wouldn’t leave me alone just because I’m staying with Max. She only gives me a few hours of peace before she starts to hound me, blowing up the new cell phone I bought in Italy like the world is about to end.

  The insecure and terrified little girl who still lives inside me wants to answer her call, but I fight the urge. My mother can go fuck herself. I’m done trying to make her like me. So the first thing I do is call my father’s lawyer. I want to visit Dad. To my dismay, he tells me Dad doesn’t want to see any visitors.

  I’m already crying before I even end the call.

  “What’s the matter, Chibi?” Max asks.

  “Dad doesn’t want me to visit.”

  He sits next to me on the couch and throws his arm around my shoulders. “Can you blame him? This is the lowest moment of his life. He doesn’t want you to see him like that.”

  I hastily wipe my tears dry. “You’re right, but it doesn’t make things easier.”

  “Here, maybe this will make you feel better.” He offers me his cell phone.

  “What is it?”

  “Your boyfriend left you a voice message.”

  “And you listened to it?” I shriek.

  Guilt takes over his face. “I’m sorry. I didn’t recognize the number. I didn’t know it was from him.”

  I give him the stink eye as I grab the phone from his hand. When Alistair’s voice comes through, my heart tightens. I miss him so damn much already. I wish he was here with me. He tells me to call him back as soon as I’m able, no matter the time.

  I’m ready to do that when the annoying sound of the intercom buzzer interrupts. Max heads to the kitchen to answer it while I head to the bathroom to wash my face. When I return to the living room, he’s sporting a grimace.

  “Who was that?”

  “Your mother. She’s on her way up.”

  “I don’t want to talk to her.”

  “I know, Chibi, but I couldn’t just not buzz her in. She would keep pestering us. You knew you wouldn’t be able to avoid her, so you might as well get this over with. I’ll head to my room to give you some privacy.”

  I want to ask Max to stay, but that wouldn’t be a smart move. If my mother doesn’t like me, she hates him with a passion. It has always been this way since we were kids.

  No sooner has Max disappeared into his room than the doorbell rings. I take a deep breath, steeling myself for this unpleasant encounter before I open the door.

  As usual, Ofelia Moretti is the example of poise and perfection. Her sharp dark Chanel suit doesn’t have a wrinkle that can be seen. I open the door wider and let her in.

  She glances around Max’s small apartment with a sneer on her face, as if searching for something to criticize.

  “I see your cousin has made himself scarce.”

  “He wanted to give us some privacy. What are you doing here, Mother?”

  “I came to get you, of course.”

  “You’ve wasted your time, then. I’m not staying with you at the penthouse.”

  Her eyes widen. “How dare you speak to me like that? Don’t you think I’ve suffered enough?”

  “Tell me, Mom. Are you suffering because the love of your life is in jail or because the family name is tainted now?”

  “As usual, you’re an ungrateful little brat. Let’s see how you fare now that the money tree has died. The government seized all our assets. Did you know that? We’re lucky the penthouse belongs to my family.”

  “Yes, the lawyer filled me in. I’ll be okay. I can get a job. I’d be more concerned about your situation. What can you do?”

  My mother’s eyes flash with rage. I’m playing with fire here, but I’m too angry to care about the consequences.

  “I’m not going to stay here and listen to you throw insults my way. If you want to stay with your worthless cousin, be my guest.”

  When she walks to the door, I let out a sigh of relief. Too soon though. I should have known she wouldn’t just leave without delivering a killing blow. She looks over her shoulder with hate pouring out of her eyes.

  “Paola told me all about your affair with that married teacher. I was right all along. All you wanted was to sleep around. You’re a filthy whore and a disgrace to our family.”

  The insult shouldn’t hurt as much, coming from her. It’s nothing new. But it does. It feels like I’ve been sucker punched in the gut.

  I wince, unable to hide my reaction from my mother. The worst part is to see her take pleasure from my pain.

  She walks out without saying another word.

  She doesn’t need to. She won this round.

  The next day, Max receives a call from our uncle, Paola’s father. He paid for Dad’s bail, and he’s going to be released in the next couple of hours. A wave of relief washes over me, followed by dread. I have to be at the penthouse when Dad arrives, which means I have to deal with my mother.

  I never told Max the details of her visit yesterday, but he knew it was bad by the look on my face. I’m still reeling from it, and I almost start to believe that maybe I am a filthy whore.

  I wasn’t in the right frame of mind to speak with Alistair after her visit. I settled with sending him a text message explaining why I had to leave and that I would call him today. I’m a mess, and he’ll be able to tell right away if he hears my voice. He’s already dealing with so many problems; I don’t want to add to the tally.

  I get dressed and wear the best outfit I brought with me, a dark gray pantsuit that I bought in case I needed to look professional. It’s overkill—Dad has never cared about what I wear—but I don’t want to give my mother any more reason to throw insults my way.

  Who are you kidding, Chiara? She doesn’t need a reason.

  By the time Max and I arrive at my parents’ luxurious apartment, the entire family is already there. Fuck, it’s the middle of the week. Don’t they have jobs? At least Pietro didn’t come with his wife. Paola is sitting next to my mother on the couch, and staring at them side by side, they look more like a mother and daughter duo than Mom and me. A sliver of jealousy spears through my heart, even though by now, I shouldn’t feel anything at all.

  Will I ever stop wanting that odious woman to love me?

  Max leaves me alone for a second to speak with his mother. She used to be one of the most beautiful women in Italy, but years of abuse under the hands of Max’s dad took their toll on her. She’s overweight and looks ten years older than she really is. Plus, she’s now a drunk. As a matter of fact, she’s hovering near the dry bar in the living room with a glass of whiskey in her hand.

  Poor Max. He doesn’t deserve this.

  “Is Dad already home?” I ask no one in particular.

  “He’s in his office with your uncle and the lawyer,” Paola’s mother answers. “What a scandal. What a blemish to the Moretti name.”

  And so it starts. I don’t have the stomach to hear dear Auntie’s lamentations, so I head to the dining room table where food has been served.

  I’m busy spreading foie gras on a piece of toast when Paola stops next to me.

  “Like father like daughter, I guess.”

  “Don’t start, Paola. I’m not in the mood for your petty games.”

&nb
sp; Ignoring my comment, she continues. “I’m surprised your boyfriend didn’t tag along. Did he get tired of you already?”

  “That’s none of your business. I’m surprised your husband isn’t here. Did he get tired of you already?

  “Pietro is on a very important business trip. He would be here if he could.”

  Her defensive tone tells me things aren’t as rosy as she wants me to believe. I can’t help but push the dagger deeper.

  “Right, but not because of you.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “Oh, I guess I forgot to tell you how Pietro confessed moments before your wedding that he was in love with me and that you were his second choice.”

  “You lie!”

  I shrug. “It doesn’t matter. I told him I would never have him, so you don’t have to worry about me stealing your perfect husband away.”

  “It wouldn’t be the first time,” she grits out. “Isn’t your boyfriend married?”

  I pop a grape in my mouth. “Not for much longer. And let me tell you, stealing Alistair away from his conniving wife was so much fun.”

  If I’m going to be labeled a home-wrecker, I might as well have fun with it.

  I turn on my heels, putting extra sass in my steps.

  Was it mean to tell Paola about Pietro? Absolutely, but I can’t find an ounce of regret in me. She more than deserves the pain.

  45

  Chiara

  It seems everyone gets to speak with Dad before he calls me into this office. He stands from his chair and walks around his massive desk to hug me.

  “Dad, are you okay?”

  “I’ll be fine, bambina. Don’t worry about me.”

  Pulling back, I stare at his face. His eyes are bloodshot, and he has dark circles under them. I can smell the whiskey and cigar on his breath.

  He moves away, returning to his chair. I have no choice but to sit across from him.

  “Is it true?” I ask before I lose my nerve.

  He smiles tightly at me with sad eyes. “It’s complicated, Chiara.”

  “What’s complicated about it? It’s a simple question, Dad. Is it true or not?”

  “No, of course it’s not true.” He fills his empty glass with more whiskey and leans back.

  He’s lying. The certainty makes my heart sink. Part of the respect I have for him dies. I would have preferred if he had been honest with me. Does he think I’ll stop loving him because of what he’s done?

  “Mom is worried about the frozen assets.”

  “She’ll be fine. But I’m afraid you won’t be able to continue your studies abroad.”

  “Why? I thought my tuition and boarding had been paid for already.”

  Dad shakes his head, and regret fills his eyes. “I’m afraid not. I’m very sorry, Chiara.”

  I stare at his desk while my brain processes the news. If I’m no longer a student, I can’t stay in the US.

  Alistair comes to the forefront of my mind. I should be more concerned about my education, but graduating from DuBose seems small compared to losing him.

  “I’ll be okay, Dad. I can always finish high school in a public school.”

  “Joe is helping me. So if you need any assistance, don’t be shy to ask him. He’s your uncle, after all.”

  The last thing I want is to ask Paola’s father for help. I don’t care if he’s Dad’s older brother.

  I nod, pretending to agree with him.

  “Your mother told me you’re staying with Max. What kind of nonsense is that? You should be here.”

  “I can now that you’re back.”

  “Good. Now go collect your things. I still have lots to talk about with your uncle and the lawyer.”

  “Okay, Dad. I’ll see you later.”

  I avoid the living room, choosing to hide in my bedroom. Closing the door, I check my emails and see several from Alistair. Guilt sneaks into my heart. I’ve been avoiding him for too long, and he must be going out of his mind. It’s still early in California, so I text him.

  He replies right away, asking how I am.

  Taking a deep breath, I call him.

  “Goldi, thank God you called.”

  Sitting on my bed, I rest my head in my hand. “Hey, I’m sorry I didn’t until now. It’s been difficult.”

  “I read on the news about your father. I’m so sorry, Chiara. I wish I could be there with you.”

  “Me too. But you have your own problems to deal with.”

  I should tell Alistair about not coming back to DuBose, but I can’t bring myself to give him more bad news over the phone.

  “I swear, Goldi, if it weren’t for my parents. I’d be there with you.”

  “I know. How are they holding up?”

  “Devastated. We were allowed back in town. It’s gone. Everything has been razed to the ground.”

  “I’m so sorry, Alistair.”

  “Don’t worry about us, sweetheart. We’ll be okay. When do you think you’ll be back?”

  Oh God. I have to tell him I’m only going back to pack my stuff. “I-I don’t know. Dad has been released on bail, but everything is still a big question mark.”

  “And your mother?”

  “As awful as always. But I’ve got Max here. I’ll be okay.”

  “Call me whenever you need me, Goldi. It doesn’t matter the time.”

  “I will. You do the same, okay?”

  “Okay. I love you, and I miss you.”

  “I love you and miss you too.”

  My eyes fill with tears as I end the call. I don’t want to say goodbye to Alistair, but I can’t expect him to make a commitment to me so I can stay in the US.

  There’s a knock on my door before it opens and Max’s head pops through the sliver. “There you are. I can’t stay here for a minute longer. I’m heading to town to meet some friends. Do you want to join me?”

  “Yeah, sure.”

  I’m not really in the mood to socialize, but staying in this apartment surrounded by family members who hate me would be masochistic to say the least.

  ALISTAIR

  “Did you talk with Chiara?” my father asks when I come into the kitchen at five in the morning.

  “Yes. What are you doing up?”

  “I couldn’t sleep. How is she holding up?”

  “She’s having a hard time, I could tell. It kills me that I can’t be there with her.”

  “If you’re staying here on our account, don’t. Your mother and I will be fine.”

  “It’s not only that, Dad. I want to settle things with Nadine first. She’ll always be a hindrance until the divorce is finalized.”

  “Is your lawyer making progress?”

  “Oh yeah. That video Nadine posted turned out to be a big mistake on her part. Anyway, we have a meeting with the insurance company tomorrow. We had a good policy coverage. The insurance money should be enough to start anew.”

  “Listen, son, about that. Your mother and I have been talking, and we decided we don’t want to run a vineyard anymore.”

  My eyes widen. “But it was your dream.”

  “Yes, it was. But it was more hard work than we anticipated, and we don’t want to start from scratch.”

  “So what are you going to do?”

  “Travel, see the world.”

  “I confess I’m a little disappointed. I was hoping that now that I don’t have a job teaching anymore, I could help you with the business.”

  “If you want to own a vineyard, what’s stopping you?”

  I open and shut my mouth, but no sound comes forth. Dad is right, there’s nothing stopping me from forging ahead without my parents. Well, there’s Chiara to consider now. She wouldn’t want to give up a career in the city to move to wine country with me. She hasn’t even gone to college yet.

  He pats my shoulder. “You don’t have to decide everything right this second, son. Take your time, talk with your girl.”

  “How did you know I was thinking about her?”


  “I wasn’t born yesterday. I know that glint in your eyes. I see it every day when I look at my reflection in the mirror. You are head over heels in love with Chiara, just like I’m still in love with your mother. I never saw that spark in your gaze when you were married to Nadine.”

  I look down and cross my arms. “There are so many obstacles in our way though. It’s hard for me to think about the future and see a happily ever after as much as I want to believe it’s possible.”

  “Stop focusing on the problems and focus on the reward. Is she worth it?”

  There’s no hesitation on my part.

  “Fuck yes.”

  46

  Chiara

  I turn the doorknob very quietly, not wanting to make any sound and wake the banshee—aka my mother. It’s past two in the morning, but I wouldn’t put it past her to be waiting for me in the living room. With my shoes in my hands, I tiptoe toward my room.

  The entire house is as quiet as a tomb and dark as well. When I walk by my father’s office, I notice light pouring through the crack. I hesitate for a second. Maybe I should go check on him. We hardly had time to talk earlier, and maybe I can offer him some comfort, even if he’s not willing to tell me the truth. My hand is on the semi-open door when a gunshot rings in my ears, loud and terrifying.

  “Papa!” I burst inside his office, and suddenly time seems to move in slow motion.

  Dad’s body is on the floor. The only thing visible from where I stand is his prone hand and a gun. I run around the desk, dropping to my knees next to him. Blood is splattered on the carpet.

  I hear screaming moments before I’m pushed to the side and my mother takes my place. I’m in too much shock to do anything but stare and cry. Then my mother is shaking me and yelling, but I can’t discern her words through the loud roar in my ears.

  She shoves me out of her way and stands up. I don’t know if she’s still in the room or not. All I can do is stare at Dad.