All conversation dies in the room the minute we enter. Everyone is looking at us with similar dazed expressions. I’m trembling with fear. Kal notices, reeling me in tight and running his hand up and down my back. “Hey, everyone. You remember Lana.” He turns to me, his eyes glistening. “And this is Hewson.” He flips his chin up, looking his parents directly in the eye. “Our son.”
You could hear a pin drop in the room. No one says anything. Everyone just stares, mouths hanging open, with shell-shocked expressions on their face.
Faye is the first to break the tension. Of course, she and Ky already knew, but Kal had sworn them to secrecy. She races across the room, giving me a quick hug. “You look great, and I’m so glad you’re here.” Dipping her head, she beams at my son. “But this little guy. Oh my gosh!” She kisses his cheek ever so gently, and tears fill her eyes. “I’ve been so excited to meet you,” she whispers, cooing at him.
She grabs Kal into a smothering hug, never once taking her eyes off Hewson. “He’s soooooo beautiful. I want to run away with him.” A mischievous glint appears in her eye. “Clearly, he takes after Lana, considering you’re pig ugly and all.” She nudges Kal’s shoulder, smirking. Her teasing tone is exactly what’s needed to slice through the frigid atmosphere.
Then our son bridges that final gap.
I’ve heard Mom talk about the precious moments in life. Those special times when I was little and I did things for the first time. This is one of those times. A memory to cherish.
Hewson’s lower lip trembles a little as he looks around the room at all the expectant faces. He’s at the stage where he’s starting to get nervous around strangers. He wiggles in my embrace, and his arms go out, reaching for Kal. Kal gathers him to his chest, his eyes shining with so much love. Then Hewson opens his mouth and utters his first word. “Dada.”
My heart explodes with pride and sheer happiness. Tears leak out of my eyes when Kal starts crying, cradling Hewson in his arms and kissing the top of his head repeatedly, holding him so lovingly, like he’s the most precious cargo in the world. “Say it again,” he whispers, being totally greedy.
“Dada.”
“That’s my boy!” Kal smacks a loud kiss on his cheek as a sob erupts across the room.
Alexandra rushes toward us, tears flowing freely down her cheeks. The rest of the family trail behind her. “Darling, that was so precious.” She wraps her arms around all of us, hugging us. “He’s so beautiful.” Easing back, she crouches over until she’s eye level with Hewson. “Hello, darling. Welcome to the family.” She takes his tiny hand, and he latches on, curling his finger around hers. She visibly melts. Then Hewson gurgles, smiling at her, no hint of discomfort at all.
“Oh, boy,” Faye says, winking at me. “That one’s going to be trouble.” We laugh. “I can already see the girls lining up.”
“Hey, Lanabelle,” Keaton says, drawing me in for a hug. “I’ve missed you.”
I can scarcely speak over the wedge of emotion in my throat, although, I shouldn’t be surprised. Keaton has always been the most gracious, the most sensitive of all Kal’s brothers, and we’ve always gotten on well. “I missed you too,” I croak, holding him tight.
Then he looks at Hewson, and my heart melts at the look on his face. “Hey there, little dude.” He wipes the sloppy dribble off Hewson’s chin in a sweet gesture.
“He’s teething,” I explain, removing a fresh bib from my bag and replacing the wet one around his neck.
“He’s adorable,” Keaton remarks, staring at Hewson with a massive smile on his face. “Let’s hope he takes after you and not jerk face.” He gestures toward Kal.
“Hey, no bad language in front of my son.” Kal shoots his brother a stern look, and Keaton cracks up laughing.
The others crowd around, and I soak up the atmosphere, my tense muscles relaxing with every laugh, every joke.
We are late starting dinner because each of Kal’s brothers wants a turn holding Hewson. Kal goes to his room—where we’re all staying—to make up Hewson’s crib. I’m comfortably seated on one of the big leather couches, with Hewson dozing in my arms, while Faye and Alex set the table. James, Kal’s dad, disappears for a while, returning with a sturdy, wooden old-fashioned highchair. “This was your daddy’s,” he tells Hewson, strapping him in.
When we are all seated, with heaped plates in front of us, James raises his glass in a toast. “To family and extended family.” His eyes are soft as he looks around the table. “Alex and I are so grateful you are here with us today. Every person at this table holds a special place in our hearts.” He glances at Adam, Faye’s father. “Even you, Adam,” he teases, and we all laugh. According to Faye, her uncle and her bio dad resolved their differences during their Irish vacation last summer.
“Wow,” Adam jokes. “That’s high praise indeed.” He nods at James, and a moment passes between them.
“We are especially grateful to officially welcome Lana and Hewson to the family. Awesome name by the way.” He winks at me, and I smile. “All any parent wants is to see their children happy. And I see lots of happiness today.”
He clearly misses the eye rolling Kent’s been doing at his expense.
We raise our glasses. “To family. To health, happiness, love, and forgiveness. To the future.”
Kal is putting Hewson down, and I’m sitting with Faye, Kyler, and the rest of Kal’s brothers in the games room. “Who would’ve thought a little baby would turn all the burly Kennedy boys to mush?” Faye says, smiling. “They adore him. I adore him.” She looks wistfully at Kyler.
“I can tell.” I take a sip of my wine, as Kal strolls into the room.
“All good?” I ask, straightening up.
“He’s tuckered out.” He chuckles, taking his beer off the table. “He fell asleep the instant his head hit the pillow.”
Kent snorts, leaning forward and winking at me. “Taking after his daddy already. You’d want to watch that.”
Everyone groans. You can always count on Kent to try to stir shit up.
“That reminds me.” Kal hands me his beer and walks to his brother’s side. Superfast, before anyone has even registered the motion, Kal’s fist juts out, and he punches Kent on the nose.
The place goes crazy.
“Shh!!” I hiss. “Don’t wake the baby!”
“What the fuck?” Kent explodes, prodding the sides of his nose for damage.
“If you ever touch Lana again, I will happily kick your ass all over Wellesley.”
All eyes turn to me, and my cheeks heat. “Oh my God. Kal! Stop it!”
“Dude, she was so into me.” Kent smirks, and I draw a sharp breath. He’s not going to let this go. Standing up, he starts rolling his hips in a thrusting fashion. “She loved every second of it. Don’t let her tell you different.” Next, he starts humping the arm of the chair. “This cock is magic, baby.” Faye snorts with laughter, while I bury my head in my hands, groaning. Trust Kent to totally exaggerate and Kal to completely overreact. He knows we only made out for a bit. That Kent’s cock never came in direct contact with any part of my body.
But they’re both idiots.
Kal lunges at his brother, wrestling him to the ground. They thrash about, swinging a few punches as the rest of the Kennedy boys watch the show.
Kaden—Kal’s eldest brother—lands a hand on my shoulder. “And he’s a father now?” His lips curve into a smile. “God help us all.”
Kal and I are sitting in the conservatory, alone, drinking hot chocolate a few hours later. “Are you happy?” he asks.
“Couldn’t be happier. I was worried they wouldn’t accept us, accept me, but they’ve been very welcoming.” I know it can’t be easy for the Kennedys to forgive me. I put Kal through hell last year, but they seem willing to give me the benefit of the doubt, and I’m grateful. This has gone much better than I expected. I know how imp
ortant this was for Kal, so I’m delighted it’s gone smoothly.
“I knew they would be. Dad loves babies, and my brothers act all tough, but they’re really pussies underneath.” He cups the back of my head, kissing me sweetly on the lips. “Besides, you’re practically family. You grew up with us, Lana, and I know my brothers all love you.”
We wander back into the sitting room, and I smile at the sight of Faye softly singing to Hewson as she rocks him in her arms. “He woke up a few minutes ago. She didn’t want to disturb you, or at least that’s the story she’s sticking to,” Kyler tells us in a whisper. His eyes look suspiciously shiny as his girlfriend cradles Hewson in her arms, looking like a total natural.
Kal and I share a knowing look. Kyler hasn’t taken his eyes off Faye for more than a few seconds all day. This is the first time I’ve been around them since they got together officially, and it’s not hard to see how besotted they are with one another. It’s a side of Kyler I’m not used to. As he gazes adoringly at her, it isn’t difficult to guess his thoughts.
Alex obviously thinks so too. Planting herself directly in front of Kyler, she pierces him with a serious look. “Don’t even think about it,” she whispers. “Let me get to know one grandchild before you introduce another.”
“Chill out, Mom.” Kyler tucks her into his side. “I’m just admiring the view.” Faye is completely oblivious to all this, totally wrapped up in Hewson, pressing soft kisses to his head as she continues to rock him in her arms even though he’s already fast asleep again. “And hoping that’ll be me, be us, one day. But not yet.” He kisses the top of his mom’s head. “I always wrap it before I tap it, so don’t worry.”
Alex turns pale, and Kal almost chokes. I attempt to smother my laugh. Alex puts a hand over her heart. “I’m sure I didn’t need to hear that. We’re being responsible would’ve more than sufficed.”
From the corner of my eye, I watch Adam narrow his eyes at Kyler. Kyler straightens up, clearing his throat. “Apologies, Adam. That was insensitive of me. I meant no disrespect.”
Kal buries his head in my shoulder, muffling his laughter.
“The twins are in earshot, Kyler. I’d appreciate it if you remember that. And I’m with your mom. I’m not overly fond of hearing details of my daughter’s sex life.”
“On that awesome note,” Kal says, snickering, “we’re heading to bed.” He takes my hand as we say our goodnights. Faye reluctantly passes Hewson into my arms, and together, as the family unit I always wanted us to be, we retreat to our room for the night.
Alex asks to speak to me the following morning after breakfast, suggesting a walk on the grounds. It’s freezing outside, but the air is crisp and dry. Smothering my nervousness, I wrap Hewson up nice and cozy and grab my coat. I push the stroller outside, with Alex by my side. We don’t talk for a few minutes, and my anxiety is increasing with every step.
A short while later, just as we’ve entered the wooded area that borders the rear of their estate, she clears her throat. “I wanted to talk to you because there are some things I need to say.” She looks over at me, smiling softly. “I don’t know exactly what you think of me, but you should know I was never opposed to you, Lana. You’re as much a daughter to me as Faye. I’ve always known how you and Kal felt about each other. You were inseparable from the moment you met, even when you were very little we could see the love shining between you. James and I always said you two would end up together.”
I can’t hide my surprise. For years, I’ve believed Alex disliked me.
“That day in Nantucket, I knew things had turned a corner, that your relationship was evolving, and I stopped it because I felt you were too young. I didn’t tell Kalvin not to hang out with you anymore. I asked him not to take things further with you until you were a little older. I didn’t realize the part I would play in what would end up happening, and for that, I’m truly sorry. I don’t fully understand what happened between you, and I don’t want to know, Lana. He’s my son and there are certain things I don’t care to hear. I’m sorry that you got hurt, and I’m unbelievably happy that you were able to find your way back to each other.”
She stops, and I’m shocked to see tears in her eyes. She squeezes my hand. “I’m so grateful you’ve brought Hewson into our lives. I’m a firm believer that things happen for a reason.”
“You’re not upset? Because we’re so young, and it’s something else I kept from him?”
“Sweetheart.” She hugs me briefly. “A baby is always a blessing, and I can already see how much you and Kalvin love him. Besides, I wasn’t that much older than you when I got pregnant with Kaden. It’d be very hypocritical of me to criticize you.”
“Thank you,” I say quietly. “I was very worried coming here. I thought you’d all hate me because of what I did. I know I’ve hated myself enough for it.”
She pauses momentarily. “It’s time to forgive yourself, honey. You want to look forward to the future, not remain chained to the past. I should know.” She peers into my eyes. “I spent years hiding a secret that almost destroyed us. I’ve only recently come to realize how that link to the past was holding me back from the things I wanted to do. I don’t want you to make the same mistakes. I know you love my son with all your heart. You always have, and I know the person you are in here.” She taps a finger against my chest. “And that’s why I can forgive you. Why we’ve all forgiven you. God knows we’ve made our fair share of mistakes. Who the hell are we to judge?”
I don’t realize I’m crying until she wipes her thumbs across the dampness on my face. She pulls me into a hug. “I wouldn’t want anyone else for my son. You’ve always been perfect for him, Lana. My intention was never to keep you two apart. I just wanted to slow things down until you were both ready. All I want for my sons is that they’re happy. That they find someone to love who loves them as much in return. Kalvin has that in you. You two are for life. I wish you every happiness, honey, because you deserve it. And I want you to know you are as much a part of this family as anyone. You always have been.”
When we return to campus in January, we discover both Shelby and Chase have been expelled for conduct which brings the university into disrepute. One in five students on campus suffers some form of sexual assault which is why the authorities treat such incidents very seriously.
I’m now enrolled in the creative writing program, and I’ve a huge amount of work to catch up on, but hard work has never scared me. As we settle into our new apartment, and Hewson settles into the Baby Gators daycare facility, I feel a level of contentment that is unsurpassed.
Mom and Dad are happy in Connecticut, and while I’m sad that things didn’t work out for her with her parents—my grandparents have resumed ignoring us and pretending like we don’t exist—I can’t say I’m losing much sleep over it. It’s a shame my grandmother couldn’t get over her aversion to my father, couldn’t let the past stay in the past, and while I will always be grateful to her for taking me and Hewson in, I’m not going to allow her to cast a shadow on my future. If she wants to reconcile in the future, I would be receptive, but I’m not going out of my way to make amends.
Kal and Hewson are my priority now, and everything else takes a back seat.
As the weeks turn into months, we adjust to our new schedule, with the help of friends. Saturday night is date night and the one day of the week when Kal and I can focus on our relationship. Our friends take turns babysitting, even Brett who turns out to be the best sitter of all, and life is good.
More than good.
I’m living my dream, and the reality is even better.
Every day, I fall more and more in love with my man. Kal is everything I hoped he’d be and more. I couldn’t wish for a better best friend, a better lover, a better cheerleader. And he’s an amazing dad. Hewson is the apple of Kal’s eye, and they are literally joined at the hip. On weekends, we go on family outings, and once a month, w
e take turns visiting our extended families. Mom and Dad were a little wary of Kal, at first, but thanks to his unwavering love of me and our son, they have since embraced him.
I walk around with a smug, happy look plastered on my face, and there is little to complain about.
Kal finally read my book, and I shared my plans with him. With his support and encouragement, I self-published The Story of Us two months ago. To my shock and delight, it was an instant bestseller. I’m distributing twenty-five percent of the profits to a rape support charity, and the rest is being saved toward next semester’s tuition. Kal argues with me relentlessly over it. But, a deal’s a deal.
And I’m a lucky bitch.
I know that.
As we prepare to spend the summer break together, I acknowledge how things could have turned out so differently and how happy I am with where my life is heading.
I couldn’t ask for anything more.
Epilogue
August
Lana
I’m leaning over the ledge staring at the crystal-clear waters of the Atlantic Ocean, taking a moment to cherish the beauty that is my life. The moon casts magical shadows on the sea, and in the distance, the faint sounds of laughter can be heard. Glancing along the beach, I spot the telltale glow of a fire. The beach parties along this private strip are legendary.
When Alex and James said we could use the Nantucket house for the summer, I squealed with joy. Getting to spend every minute of every day with Kal and my son is a luxury we don’t normally have, and I wanted to pack as much into our summer break as possible.
But it’s more than that.
This house and this island have always had a special place in my heart. This is where I fell completely in love with my soul mate, and the memories I have of summers spent here will never fade. That we get to experience this again, and to make new memories with our son, thrills me in ways I can’t even begin to explain.
Loving Kalvin (The Kennedy Boys Book 4) Page 29