by Nashoda Rose
His arm loosened and his fingers splayed across my abdomen, then with a slight feathered touch he caressed my skin. That was how I fell back asleep, wrapped in his arms, hot and bothered and Ream caressing me.
I moaned and pulled the pillow underneath my cheek then slowly opened my eyes. I was greeted with the sun blazing beams of light across the room. I bolted upright and listened for any noises. No Ream. It was quiet. Tranquil. It was … beautiful. I hadn’t slept in this long since … well, since forever.
The farm could be quiet and serene when the guys weren’t there, but there were always things to do, horses to look after, paintings to finish. This morning I had nothing to do.
Except deal with Ream.
And since there was no sign of him, I scrambled out of bed, threw on the shirt lying on the end of the bed, and quickly went to the washroom to freshen up. I froze as my gaze hit the cup by the sink. My pink toothbrush stood beside his blue toothbrush.
I didn’t like it. Not at all. It made it feel … well, real. And that scared me because despite wanting this to work, I was ready for it not to. I had to prepare myself for the worst because the worst always knocked at my door. I knew how to handle it if I kept my emotions hidden. The problem was Ream knocked loud, and with Ream I was afraid he would bust right through. He was right, this wasn’t about sex.
No sounds came from the kitchen, so I walked out the screen door and peered down at the dock. Ream sat with his feet in the water, a mug beside him. He hadn’t noticed me yet, so I stood and watched as he swirled his feet back and forth leaning back on his elbows, his face tilted toward the sun.
Wow. There was nothing of the man I knew down there. Even when we had the two weeks at the farm, he had an edge to him. This was a part of Ream I’d never witnessed. He looked completely relaxed and content, and I suspected if I were closer, I’d be able to witness the tension gone from his face.
Was that why he brought me here? So I could see this side of him? Why did he look so … at peace?
I went back inside, careful to quietly close the door so he wouldn’t know I was awake, then I went in search of my cell phone. It had to be here somewhere.
I went through the kitchen drawers and cupboards, then the dresser in the bedroom, messing up all the neat piles of clothes he’d placed there last night. Then I looked under the bed, in the nightstands, went through his pockets, and even searched the fridge, which surprisingly was full of food. He had someone come stock the place before we arrived? How long had he planned on bringing me here?
“Find what you’re looking for?”
I bolted upright from looking in the bottom drawer of the oven and smashed my head on the corner of a cupboard I’d left open. “Oww. Shit.” I rubbed the spot and then closed the offending cupboard door. “Where’s my phone? I need to call, Emily.”
“I already did. Next.”
I clamped my jaw and glowered. “I need to know the time. There isn’t a clock in this place.”
“Where are you going that you need to know the time?”
I had no answer. I just wanted to know.
And Jesus, I really wish he’d put on a shirt. Ream watched me, the corners of his lips curved up. I pursed my lips together and glared back. He knew exactly what he was doing.
“I need to call Matt.”
“Matt knows we went away.”
“Yes, but he needs to know where we are.”
“You mean you need to know where we are.”
Shit.
“Babe, enough of the fuckin’ needs and get your suit on and come down to the dock.” He walked to the coffee maker and poured two cups. His tats glistened with sweat, and the ones over his shoulder blades expanded as he picked up the mugs. “And stop thinking about everyone else for a change.” He paused then added, “Except me. You can think of me deep inside your pussy anytime.” He hesitated and I saw a flicker of unease in his eyes as he said, “Or would you like to suck me off again?”
“You’ve got to be kidding.”
He turned and leaned up against the counter, steaming coffees in hand, chest staring at me like a beacon for my fingers to trail over the contours of valleys and hills. He raised his mug and took a sip, his eyes never once leaving me. “Guess that’s a no?”
“Yeah, it’s a no. It’s your stupid rule about the no sex.”
He shrugged. “Haven’t you ever broken the rules?” He paused then he did the sexiest move ever, eyes intense and smoldering, slightly lazy. He slowly trailed his gaze from the tips of my toes up to my mouth, hesitated, then locked on my eyes. “Mmm, you’re right. We can’t break the rules. Meet you down at the water, baby.”
I noticed my fingers were pinching my arms, and I quickly let them fall to my sides as he nonchalantly brushed aside his obvious sexual perusal of my body. Christ, I needed a cold shower. I crossed my arms over my breasts where I knew my nipples were erect as shivers trickled across my skin. “I don’t feel like putting on my bathing suit.”
“You want to find out what happens if you don’t?” The playful tone was gone and the scary, dominant ass returned. Shit, I couldn’t figure out what turned me on more.
I glared and he met it head-on with his annoyingly hot, sexy expression of a man brooding.
“If you’re not dressed in five minutes, I’m coming back up here.” He strode to the sliding door and opened it with his foot. “Wear the red one.”
I gawked. A red bathing suit? I didn’t own a red bathing suit.
I wore my white and gold bathing suit that was packed along with a red one that I’d never seen before. I tossed it into the bathroom trash and then proceeded to tell myself that this was a good idea. Then I wrapped my soft white sheer wrap around me and made my way down to the water.
Ream stood on the edge of the dock, his tall lean form a picture of perfection. Suddenly, he threw his arms forward and dove into the water. I stopped dead in my tracks, my breath caught in my throat while I watched him surface and shake his head, water droplets dispersing into the air. He ran his hand down his face, and from the side profile I could see the usual tightness around his mouth was gone.
And I liked it. What was I doing? What were we doing? What we needed was to fuck and get it out of both our systems. This ridiculous idea of no sex was just that—ridiculous.
Ream disappeared beneath the surface again and reappeared several feet farther out. Then he began swimming, his muscular arms rhythmically pulling him through the water easily.
I started walking again, sitting down and placing my feet in the cool water once I reached the edge of the dock. I leaned back on my elbows like I’d seen Ream do and closed my eyes, letting the sun filter into my skin and take the slight chill of the breeze out of me. The sun was the best medicine for MS, vitamin D overload. I took five times the amount a normal person would take in a vitamin per day, along with Omega 3s and B12 injections every month, plus my daily injection to try and keep any flare ups away. The pills I took on occasion were to calm my nerves when they were acting up.
I was diagnosed when I was sixteen after an episode where I lay down and lost feeling in my arms. It was pretty terrifying waking up and not being able to feel my arms. It was like they weighed a thousand pounds. It took several months and three MRIs, but they finally made a diagnosis that I had MS after confirming lesions on my brain. I had to sleep sitting in a recliner for a couple of months. Even washing my hair had been a task; keeping my hands above shoulder level caused them to go numb. Eventually the symptom faded, and I felt pretty normal again.
When I turned eighteen I was allowed to start the daily injections. It wasn’t a cure, but it was to try and keep the flare ups at bay.
The sun warmed my skin and I sighed as I relaxed. It had been a long time since I had done anything like this. After my parents died it took Matt and I years to get our lives back in order. Then when we finally felt comfortable, I was diagnosed and then the testing and uncertainty at what was going to happen to me began.
I si
ghed as the cloud moved away and the sun hit my face again.
The cold hand on my ankle jerked me from my stillness, and then I screamed as water rushed over my skin. My cry was quickly swallowed as my head went beneath the surface. I burst back up and heard Ream laughing.
“You dickhead.” I went to hit him, but he was too quick and dove away from me making a huge splash.
“Careful, Kat.”
“What are you going to do? Dunk me under.”
He chuckled, eyes scintillating with amusement. “Oh, baby, you haven’t seen anything yet.”
My eyes narrowed as I bobbed up and down. I wasn’t quite tall enough to stand and be above the water like Ream. “You’re not into that whipping and shit are you?” The thought was a bit exciting, but I knew my body wouldn’t deal well with any sort of physical abuse, sexually related or not.
“No,” Ream replied, coming closer to me. “A different type of abuse.”
I didn’t like the sound of that. Then why did my stomach flip-flop? Nerves. Definitely nerves. “Yeah, well, I’m not into any kind of abuse.”
“Oh you’ll like it. Trust me.”
“That’s the issue, Ream. I don’t trust you.”
“You’ll learn.”
“It’s earned, not learned, asshole.”
He shrugged. “Semantics,” he said, copying my very words.
“I’m going for a swim now that you got me all wet.”
As soon as the words were out of my mouth I regretted them. His eyes gleamed and his lips parted. He came toward me and I started to back paddle.
“You wet for me, Kat?”
“You know what I mean.” I kicked my legs out as I floated on my back, trying to get away as he waded through the water.
“You’re lying again. That’s okay, I’ll check for myself.”
“Don’t you dare.” I kicked my legs faster then reversed onto my stomach and started swimming.
I was completely mortified when a girlie scream escaped my mouth as he grabbed my ankle and yanked. I went under then sputtered and coughed when I came back up.
“Stay still.”
“Fuck off.”
“You going to argue with me?”
“I’m not arguing.”
“You’re arguing.” It was a statement.
“We’re having a discussion,” I corrected, and he immediately laughed which I didn’t like because, really, his laugh was so hot and I felt like sighing then swimming into his arms and begging … no, no, no, never begging.
“Stop fighting me, Kat.” He sounded really serious now. “Just relax and let me look after you for two days. Not much to ask, is it?”
Of course it was. I’d fought for so long to not have anyone look after me that to lose my grip on that control was like I was losing a part of me.
“Out of the water. I want to try something.”
I didn’t like the sound of that. Okay, maybe there was one molecule swimming around wanting to know, but it was one out of trillions. I swam over to the ladder and climbed out. Ream followed and I couldn’t help but glance at his dripping wet skin as he approached.
He bent down and grabbed a towel then shook it out and laid it on the dock. “Lie down.” He nodded to the towel.
I had no idea what he had planned, but since there was no sex and no whips, it couldn’t be that bad. I lay on my back and he reached over to the side of the dock then came and knelt beside me, a thick white rope in hand. I bolted upright.
“Fuck no.” But he was quick and wrapped it around my wrist so fast that I didn’t even manage to get to my knees before he was done.
“I told you, I’m not into that,” Ream reassured. “Okay, maybe some bondage if you’re being rebellious, but that’s not what this is about. It’s just to stop you from touching me.”
“What makes you think I want to touch you?”
His brows rose. Gah … was it that obvious?
“Lie back,” he gently urged, and I did, although my panic at not being able to move my wrists apart caused my breathing to run rampant. “Baby.” He smoothed his hand over my head. “Take a deep breath. You’re freakin’ out. The last thing I want to do is get your symptoms riled up.” I was getting that Ream knew more about my MS than reading a blurb about it online. He sat back on his heels and watched me for several minutes while I got my shit together.
“Then let me go.”
“I want you to feel.”
“I do feel. All the time. I’m feeling pissed off at you right now for making me do this.”
Ream cracked a half smile. “No. Forget about everything else and just feel me.”
“I did feel you. For years I felt the hurt from what happened that day.”
His eyes darkened and he frowned. “You ever just think about what the fuck you’re saying, Kat? Because it’s really pissing me off. Been for a while now. You’re holding shit over my head for what I’ve apologized for and explained why I walked out and needed time to process that shit. I’m not repeating myself. I hurt too, Kat. Don’t think you were alone in that. You fucking another guy two days after me … you think that didn’t blast a hole through me?”
He straddled me and droplets of water from his body dripped and landed onto my skin. My hands tied above my head, the heat of the sun, both of us soaking wet and Ream leaning over me yet not touching a single spot on my body, it was maddening. I wanted to say fuck everything and fall under his magnetic spell. “You either forgive me and accept what I’ve said, or you don’t. Which is it?”
I hated that he was right. “I didn’t sleep with him,” I whispered.
He froze.
God, just the look on his face made me cave and tell him the truth. “I never planned on it. I just … I was hurt you ran out. I thought you were disgusted with me and I … I was trying to find a way to get my dignity back. So that … so that it looked like you didn’t matter.”
“Kat.” His voice was quiet. “You matter. We matter. Always have. But no more hurting one another. I want to hear you say the words.”
“Ream.” I took in a large inhale of air. “I … I don’t want us to hurt anymore.”
“Me neither, baby.”
Hands on either side of my head, knees straddling my pelvis, chest inches from my breasts, and all I could do was lie still, my breathing erratic and my lips dry and aching. Shit, could lips ache to be kissed? Because mine were and if I moved, I’d touch him and I wanted that desperately. “Your nipples are aching for me to touch them.” He lifted his hand just above my right breast and I stopped breathing. “Do you want me too?”
My pride screamed no, but my body screamed “hell yes.” I arched my back and he moved his hand away. I made a low growl with frustration.
“Ream? What are you playing at?”
“Not playing at … playing with.” He leaned closer, his lips hovering over mine. Water drops slipped down his strands of hair and sprinkled my face. “You didn’t follow instructions.”
“What?”
He looked briefly at my breasts. “The red suit. What did you do? Have a hissy and throw it out?”
I averted my eyes. “Yeah, well I don’t follow instructions very well.”
“Oh, beautiful, I know that. And we’re going to take the next couple of days to make certain you do.”
“I’m not a fucking dog, Ream.”
He chuckled and I felt the vibrations in the dock penetrate into my body. “We going to have issues?”
I glared.
“Yeah. I see we are.” He suddenly got up and grabbed the towel lying next to me and wrapped it around his waist. Then he leaned down, undid the rope, and started walking back to the cottage. “Let’s eat.”
What? He was walking away? He ties me up, straddles me, teases me, and then he casually gets up and walks away?
I was so livid and turned on at the same time that I couldn’t even begin to understand the emotions playing havoc on my body. I’d wanted him to grab me and kiss me then sink his cock into me s
o hard and fast. Jesus, I can’t believe he had the nerve to walk away? Just because I didn’t put on the red suit he bought me?
I scrambled to my feet and dove into the water. Just before I went beneath the surface, I heard him chuckle.
***
By the time I came back to the cottage, the aroma of bacon, burnt toast, and eggs flooded the air. I hesitated at the screen door, peering in, seeing Ream with his shirt off, shoulder blades reflecting each movement as he shoveled around eggs in the frying pan.
As if sensing me watching him, he glanced over his shoulder. “Eggs are nearly done. I burned the toast. Put some more on, would you?”
I slid the screen door open, walked in, then set the mugs on the counter. If I moved a few steps closer, my body would be up against his¸ hands able to stroke every contour of his back. I quickly looked away.
The scrape of the spatula on the aluminum pan reminded me of fingernails skating down skin—Ream’s skin. I couldn’t do this. I was on fire and I was going to combust. How could he calmly stand there flipping eggs when ten minutes ago he’d been on top of me with my hands tied?
I jerked as he slid the pan off the burner then turned. “Toast?”
“Umm, yeah.” I slid past him and grabbed the bag of bread and pulled out four pieces, which I plopped in the toaster. I pressed the lever down and stood staring at it, palms flat on the counter.
I jumped when I felt his hands on my hips. I could feel every pad of his fingertips through my sheer cover up. Suddenly I wished I’d gone and put something thicker on … like a snowsuit. He moved in closer and his naked chest pressed into my back.
Oh Jesus. My throat was dry and I swear any willpower I thought I had just got machine gunned and lay in a pool of blood on the kitchen floor.
His hands slid up my sides and then back down again, and it felt like he left a trail of electricity behind. I closed my eyes, my stomach dropped, and a swish of desire settled in deep. I couldn’t do this.
He won. I admit it. My stubborn resolve was splattered across the heated frying pan and I was letting him win.
I swung around so fast that I think I startled him, and he fell back a step. I grabbed him on either side of his head and yanked him in—hard.