Where the Road Takes Me

by Jay McLean

  One day left.

  I was going to miss the shit out of her.

  Chloe

  Arms around my waist gripped me tight. I panicked for a second, but then a familiarity set in. Blake. I was airborne. My legs kicked out in front of me as I mumbled some form of apology to the family whose ice cream I had just started to scoop. Blake and Josh’s laughter filled my ears. I stopped kicking and gave in to the inevitable.

  The sunlight hit my eyes when they opened the storeroom door that led to an alleyway behind the building.

  Blake set me carefully back on the ground. “I didn’t see you at the ceremony,” he said.

  “I told you I wasn’t going. I was only working a half shift here, and I wanted some extra time with Dean and Mary.”

  “Fair enough. But what about my extra time?” He pouted.

  I leaned back against the wall and hid my hands behind me. “I’m sorry.”

  Truth was I was avoiding him. I didn’t know how I would’ve reacted had I been at the graduation ceremony. I hated good-byes. So much so that I did everything I could just to avoid farewells. Luckily for me, I’d had years to get used to the idea of leaving everyone. When the kids had been heading off for school, I had told them I’d see them soon. Dean and Mary had taken me out to lunch, and then I’d gone to work. Mary had cried when she’d gotten in their car. I knew because I’d watched her. Letting them go actually wasn’t as bad as I’d thought it would be, especially since I’d promised Harry I’d keep it touch, and I had every intention of keeping that promise. I hadn’t said how often I’d contact them, but it would be often enough that they would know I was healthy.

  Now came the hardest part of all: saying good-bye to Blake.

  “We gotta be quick,” Josh interrupted my thoughts.

  “We got you something. A good-bye gift, I guess.”

  My heart sank. “You didn’t have to get me anything.”

  “Yeah, well . . .” He shrugged. “Something to remember us by.”

  Josh held out something long and flat, wrapped in newspaper. I already knew what it was, without having to look. Stepping forward, I took it from his hands.

  He shoved my shoulder. “Open it.”

  Blake’s low chuckle caused the ache in my chest to tighten. He shoved my other shoulder. “Yeah, open it.”

  Josh laughed, shoving me again. “Yeah, open it.”

  I smiled and shook my head. “What is wrong with you guys?”

  “Just do it,” Blake said, his voice low, serious.

  I made a show of ripping the newspaper off and being surprised by the skateboard hidden underneath. “This is amazing!”

  The storeroom door opened, and Trent, who had been hired to take my place stepped out. “It’s getting busy. I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing.”

  “Alright, fucktard. Calm your tits,” Josh yelled.

  Trent went back inside without another word.

  I laughed. “A little harsh?”

  Josh shook his head. “I’ve hated that asshole ever since I went to school with him.”

  My eyebrows pinched, and I looked up at Blake. “He goes to our school?”

  He rolled his eyes and shook his head. “Chloe, you’ve met him! How do you not know these things?”

  I shrugged.

  Then I was engulfed in Josh’s arms. “I know you didn’t want good-byes,” he whispered in my ear. “So I’m not going to say it. I’m just going to say that I’m forever thankful I met you. And I’ll remember you always, Chloe.” He released his hold and took a step back.

  I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand, containing the sob that was bursting to escape. I had held it back the entire day. I hadn’t cried with the kids, or with Mary and Dean. But I was on the edge now, and I didn’t want Blake to be the one to see it.

  Josh nodded once, and then he was gone.

  “It’s got your name on it,” Blake mumbled.

  “What?”

  “The board. Underneath. It has your name.”

  I looked down at the board in my hands as I processed what he’d said. Then I flipped it over. Not Abby, in bright-red letters.

  I laughed. “Always with the red,” I thought out loud and looked up at him. “You always write in red. What’s with that?”

  He smiled sadly. “It’s you.”

  “Me?”

  “Yes.” He stepped forward and placed his hand on my waist, pushing me back against the wall.

  I set the board down next to me. “What does it mean?”

  “Red-letter days. It’s when something unexpectedly phenomenal happens.”

  I choked on my sob.

  “You’re my unexpectedly phenomenal, Chloe. You’re my red-letter day.”

  My head dropped onto his chest, but his fingers laced in my hair, tilting my face up to look him in the eyes, like he’d done so many times before. His gaze roamed my face, searching for something I knew wasn’t there. “It’s still not enough, is it?”

  My silence was his answer.

  “No good-byes?” he asked.

  I shook my head. “No good-byes.”

  “Okay,” he whispered, his lips grazing mine. “Then I guess I’m just going to have to kiss you.”

  With one hand in my hair and the other gripping my waist, he kissed me.

  It could’ve been seconds, minutes, hours—it wasn’t long enough.

  When Josh opened the door with a look of regret on his face—and an apology for interrupting us—we knew it was time.

  That last kiss was our perfect good-bye.

  Blake

  I’d been searching for days for the words—something bigger and greater than I love you—and I’d stood there, during our last hours together, with nothing to say. But then she’d asked about the red ink, the red letters, so I’d told her she was my unexpectedly phenomenal.

  But it hadn’t been enough.

  There’d been no words exchanged after the kiss, just a silent agreement that it had been our good-bye.

  I watched the seconds of the clock tick by, waiting for her shift to be over. I was so consumed by the clock on the wall that the ticking of the seconds matched the thumping in my chest. Then Josh nudged me with his elbow. “She’s leaving.”

  My eyes snapped to the exit, where she was walking out the doors, skateboard under her arm.

  My heart stopped, but the ticking got louder.

  Or so I thought.

  But I had it wrong.

  The ticking stopped. But my heart thumped harder.

  And suddenly, everything that had happened in the past three months flashed before my eyes. Like a predeath slideshow. Only it wasn’t death. It was Chloe. All Chloe.

  I bounced on my feet.

  And looked from the clock.

  To the door.

  To the clock.

  Back to the door.

  My hands fisted.

  My body went rigid.

  I turned to Josh.

  He was smirking.

  “Josh . . .”

  That was all I had to say for his smirk to widen. “Hurry up, dude! She’s leaving!”

  And then I ran.

  Out the exit.

  Through the parking lot.

  And to her car.

  She was pulling out of the spot.

  I jumped into the passenger’s seat.

  Literally, jumped.

  She hit the brakes, her eyes wide. “What the hell are you doing?”

  “The Road.”

  “What!”

  “Just drive!”

  She stared a moment before a huge smile took over. “Are you sure?”

  Adrenaline pumped through my veins. “Just drive, Chloe.” And for a split second, I panicked. Maybe she didn’t want me there. “Please?
”

  Her eyes lit up. “Oh my God,” she mumbled, before hitting the accelerator and peeling out of the parking lot.

  We drove twenty minutes out of town before she pulled over. Her smile never faltered and she didn’t say a word. But when the car finally came to a stop and the squeal of her hand brake filled my ears, I got nervous.

  She pushed open her door and stepped out.

  I followed.

  She started hastily walking down a hidden path, and it was only then that I realized where we were. Her mom’s lake. I had been too preoccupied, watching her drive, waiting for her to stop and kick me out, to notice where we’d been going.

  She paused for a moment after the trees cleared and the lake was in view. I saw her shoulders lift, and I could picture what she was doing. She would have her eyes closed, be filling her lungs with the clean air that surrounded us.

  I cleared my throat and stood next to her. “Chloe?”

  She turned to me, confused, then a hint of a smile played on her lips. She took my hand, linking our fingers together, and led me to our rock. Or at least that was what I called it. A flat piece, hanging over the water’s edge. We had sat there, together, more times over the past nine weeks than I thought anyone had in an entire lifetime. She sat down, legs crossed like usual, and pulled me down with her. I sat behind her, with my legs on either side of her and my arms wrapped around her waist.

  It was perfect.

  And then it wasn’t.

  “What are you doing, Blake?” She sounded so sad, I almost regretted getting into the car with her. Almost.

  “I’m not ready to lose you.”

  She tilted her head to look up at me. I kissed her. Just once. I couldn’t help it. She smiled against my lips, but when she pulled away, her smile was gone, replaced by a sadness that had the power to destroy me. “That’s not an answer,” she said.

  I tensed. She was right. I tried to think of something that would satisfy her. “I have a proposition,” I said on a whim.

  “I like the sound of that,” she joked.

  “Are you being a pig?”

  “Yes.”

  We both laughed.

  “Duke’s fall semester starts August 19. After—”

  “I’ll take it,” she cut in. “I’ll take anything you give me.”

  Chloe

  I didn’t get it. I didn’t understand why he’d chased after me, or why he was still there. He knew me. He knew my story. He knew everything.

  “Stop it,” he murmured into my ear.

  “What are you talking about?” I squeezed his hands and wrapped his arms tighter around me.

  “I see the gears in your head spinning and, whatever you’re thinking about, stop it.”

  “Okay,” I said quietly. “What do we do from here? Where do we go?”

  He laughed. “Chloe, this is your journey. I’m just here for the ride. We do whatever you want.”

  “I didn’t really have a plan,” I told him. “I was just gonna drive.”

  He nuzzled his face into the crook of my neck. “That sounds like an amazing plan to me.”

  And it was.

  Until about two hours into the drive on the highway when he’d started to fidget in his seat. He’d changed the station on the radio numerous times, searched on his phone about hardwiring his iPod into said stereo, quizzed me about my lack of sports knowledge, and tried to fix the been-broken-forever console with a stick and a piece of gum.

  Then he was bouncing in his seat, chewing his nails. He barely ever chewed his nails. “Did you know that the human head weighs eight pounds?”

  I glanced at him quickly. “I did actually. The kid from Jerry Maguire taught me that.”

  “I love that kid!”

  “Me too!”

  “I wanted to be a sports agent because of that film. You know, if basketball didn’t work out.”

  “Oh yeah?”

  He nodded enthusiastically. “Yup! Before that I wanted to be a fireman. And a racecar driver. Oh! And lion tamer. How good would that be? A lion tamer. I’d call my lion LeBron, and we’d go everywhere together. He would be my best friend and we’d go to the park and laugh at all the people with their petty dogs and I’d have a kick-ass lion. I’m going to do it. Do you think there are laws? Or an adoption program? All lions need love too. Maybe I can find a blind lion. It would be harder to train but it would be worth it because—”

  “Oh my God,” I laughed and placed my hand firmly on his knee to stop the bouncing. “What is with you?”

  He froze but eyed me sideways. Then he sucked in a huge breath. “Chloe, I’m fucking bored.”

  I looked at the clock on the dashboard. “We’ve only been driving a couple hours.”

  “I know, but I’m not used to just sitting around. I’m always doing stuff.”

  “Okay.” I tried to settle him. “What do you normally do? What can we do to stop this boredom?”

  He rolled his eyes. “Quit talking to me like I’m a kid, for one.”

  I giggled. “Well, tell me what you normally do.”

  He shrugged. “I don’t know. Shoot hoops, skate, run, fuck.”

  I choked on air.

  His eyes shut tight. “Ignore that last one.”

  I did. “Pass me my bag?”

  He reached into the backseat and then handed me my bag. I pulled out a lollipop, ripped the wrapper off with my teeth, and held it in front of his mouth.

  “A lollipop?” he groaned. “Really?”

  “It’s to shut you up.”

  “I’m not Sammy!” But he opened his mouth and took it anyway.

  Two seconds later, he waved the stick in my face, sans lolly. “That didn’t last long. What else you got?”

  “It’s a lollipop. You’re supposed to suck it, not bite it.”

  “That’s what he said.”

  “Pig.” I reached into the bag and pulled out another one. “Suck it this time. Make it last.”

  He took the lollipop from my hand. “That’s what he—”

  “Shut it.”

  He laughed but put the lollipop in his mouth and crossed his arms over his chest. Even when he acted like a kid, he was still stupidly hot.

  Blake

  We found a hotel to stay at in Myrtle Beach. Even though it was only an hour-and-a-half drive from home, it took us four hours to get there. Most likely because she didn’t believe in maps.

  “Did you want to just stay the one night, Blake?”

  I shrugged. “Whatever you want.”

  “Can we book for two and then go from there?”

  The lady behind the desk nodded and took Chloe’s card. I offered to pay. She wouldn’t let me. But something was off, the lady kept eyeing me weird, and I had to bite my tongue to stop myself from asking her what the hell her problem was.

  Okay, I was on edge.

  I’d been in a car for four hours, and my mind was starting to run a little wild. I was happy I was with Chloe—don’t get me wrong. But I had left a lot of things unfinished at home. And I had left a lot of things at home. Like clothes. Running shoes. Josh. Tommy. Mom.

  “I mean no disrespect, but are y’all runaways?” the lady asked.

  Chloe laughed. “No, ma’am. We’re actually here on our honeymoon.”

  My eyes widened, but I tried to hide it when the lady smiled at us, and Chloe wrapped her arms around me. “Well, why didn’t you say so?” the lady asked. Myrtle, her name was. No shit. “I’ll upgrade you. No charge.” She held her hand to her heart. “Young love,” she sang. “Bless your hearts.”

  I dropped Chloe’s bag in the middle of the room.

  She sat on the edge of the bed and kicked her legs out in front of her. “What’s bugging you?”

  “Nothing,” I lied.

  “I can get anothe
r room,” she said quietly. “And I’ll take you home in the morning.”

  “What?” My head whipped to hers, but her face was down, watching her feet moving back and forth. “Why would you say that?”

  “I don’t know. You just seem like you regret being here.”

  My eyes drifted shut, and my shoulders sagged. I felt like an asshole. “I don’t regret it, Chloe. Not for a second.” I pulled the sheets down on one side of the bed and stripped to my boxers. After climbing in, I waited for her to do the same, but she didn’t. She just sat there, frozen. “Chloe?”

  She turned to me now, her mouth pulled down into a frown. My insides twisted, and I hated myself, because I knew I was the reason she looked like that. I sat up on my knees and lifted her off the bed, placing her under the covers and into my arms. “I’m an asshole.”

  “A little.” She turned so we were face-to-face. “Talk to me.”

  “I don’t regret being here with you. Not at all. There’s absolutely nowhere else I’d rather be right now. Believe me. I just didn’t think things through, I guess.”

  “Like what?”

  “Like clothes, I have no clothes. Right now I want to go for a run to kill the ache from sitting in the car for so long, but I only have my work clothes. And work, I just left. It was my only source of money and now it’s gone. Fuck. I have no money. You can’t pay for everything! I just need—”

  “Blake,” she cut in. “There are stores. Stores sell clothes. We can buy clothes. Work will find someone else, easily. And money—I have money. Lots of it.”

  “Where . . . I mean how do you have all this money?”

  She shrugged. “My mom and aunt left it to me. Their parents left it to them. They both died so young they never really got a chance to spend it.”

  I frowned, wondering for a moment if she’d ever get a chance to spend it. I pushed down the ache that thought had caused and moved on. “You can’t pay my way.”

  “It doesn’t cost me any extra to have you here. Hotels, gas—it’s all the same. But like I said, I can take you home tomorrow—”

  “No. Fuck, Chloe. I don’t want to be without you. That’s why I’m here.” The desperation in my voice was evident, because it was the truth. And because I was so scared of the day I’d wake up and she wouldn’t be there.