The Black Wolf's Captive (The Highland Wolf Series Book 1)

by Tessa Murran

  ‘Don’t go, Duncan,’ she said.

  ‘I must.’

  ‘Can’t you stay a few more days?’

  ‘You tempt me sorely.’ He came over and placed a light kiss on her lips. ‘But I have to go Ailsa, truly I do. I have pledged to do this for the sake of your people so I cannot fail them. You will be safe here at Dunslair and I will return soon and we will talk.’

  ‘About what you said last night?’

  ‘Aye, now stay warm in bed and I will be back before you know it.’

  He kissed her for a long time, took a moment to stare into her face as if trying to commit it to memory and then his face darkened and he hurried away. Ailsa sat for a while as the room was warmed by the sun and the castle came alive. She felt desolate. She could still feel the imprint of his body and his mouth on her as if she had been branded so she jumped up and throwing on her old red dress and her plaid she followed him out to the yard. When she caught up with him turning his horse to ride out she shouted his name. He glanced back and she saw a stricken look cross his face and then he rode back over to her.

  ‘Damn it,’ he said, but not angrily. He dismounted and still holding Ares’ reins rushed to her, put his hand to the back of her head and drew her mouth quickly to his. It was a perfect kiss - hard, desperate, passionate, yet almost despairing. It made her heart swell with longing. Ailsa clutched at the front of his rough wool jacket and for one precious moment the noise and bustle in the yard melted away and all she could think of was that she had to hold on to him, her husband, her master, her enemy, her love. He pulled back from her and prised free her fingers.

  ‘I must go Ailsa but I’ll return to you soon God willing,’ he said in a hard voice. Ailsa looked down at the ground to hide the tears that threatened to come.

  ‘Ailsa, look at me,’ he commanded. ‘If I should ever not return to you...’

  ‘Why would you not return?’

  ‘The Highlands are wild Ailsa as you know and life here is uncertain. We never know what will happen. I want you to understand that if there is ever a time when I cannot get to you or if you are in danger, seek out Rory, he will help you, he has sworn this to me. My uncle cannot be relied upon to act in your best interests so you must go to Rory.’

  ‘Why are you talking like this?’

  ‘No reason my love. I have more to live for today than I did yesterday, that is all,’ he said, ‘and you know full well what I mean for you are the cause of it. I am just reluctant to leave my warm wife for a cold ride that is all. I want you safe when I get back so keep your bed warm for me Ailsa.’ ’ He gave her a breezy smile as he mounted Ares and waved goodbye.

  Ailsa clutched her plaid around her against the chill of the dawn. Duncan’s words of love had taken her completely by surprise and she had been too stunned to return them for she could scarce believe it. It was a new and delicious feeling to be loved by this wild, tempestuous man. Her chest ached as she watched him go as if something had been ripped out. Was that what it was to love a man, a feeling so intense it was just the right side of pain, a heady mix of anguish and bliss? If that was the case then she was in love with Duncan Campbell and she prayed he would come back soon so that she could hold him quietly in her arms and tell him.

  As Duncan and his men reached the damp gloom of the forest he looked back. There was Ailsa, a lonely figure, standing at the gates, her red dress vivid against Dunslair’s dark walls. His feeling for her had made his life a deal more valuable to him than it had ever been so whatever might be waiting on the road had to be faced.

  Chapter Sixteen

  For Ailsa the next few days passed by slowly, one dragging into the next, though with Duncan’s declaration of love came a new confidence. She owed it to him to try and build bridges with the people dear to him and so she sought out some of the kinder women at Dunslair and unexpectedly their company helped ease her loneliness.

  She spent many hours listening to them gossip about the shortcomings of husbands and their plans for their children. Ailsa made an effort to be charming and attentive and soon relaxed in their company as they did in hers. Such turbulent times brought with it fears for the future and she realised that they were not so very different from her after all. They too felt powerless to resolve the dispute with the Sinclairs and dreaded the outbreak of further violence. But when they had exhausted that topic they seized on a chance to interrogate her about Duncan, whom it seemed, had been the subject of juicy female gossip for quite some time.

  ‘Tis fine that the lad has settled down at last. Oh he was a wild one when he was young,’ remarked Mairi of the bright smile and matronly manner. ‘Aye, Duncan and that scoundrel Rory were the scourge of the taverns hereabouts, Duncan, such a braw lad but so serious and grim all the time and Rory as randy as a spring goat, oft in trouble with Laird Hugh for their fighting and drinking. But of course the lasses like troublemakers, drawn to darkness like bats to a cave.

  ‘There’s many a mother who had to lock up her daughters when Duncan was at home,’ replied another laughing.

  ‘And many a husband that had to lock up his wife too,’ said Mairi to hoots of laughter. “Oh but we’ve shocked the lass,’ said Mairi when she saw Ailsa’s face.

  ‘No not at all. I know little of my husband’s life before we married and perhaps it is best it remains that way.’

  ‘Aye, you were reluctant to be his bride as I understand it,’ said one.

  ‘It’s true I had little choice in the matter.’

  ‘I’m sorry for it my dear and no mother to prepare you for your marriage duties, that must have been hard for you,’ said Mairi kindly.

  ‘And to be married to a man such as Duncan Campbell with his strong appetites,’ exclaimed another. ‘That must have been quite a shock to an innocent young thing like yourself. Does he trouble you overmuch in that way, abed I mean?’

  ‘No!’ replied Ailsa, her face glowing hot as the embers in the fire.

  ‘I’m sure she suffers terribly being so pretty and all.’ Mairi turned to her. ‘Men are such brutes and god knows they have their needs but remember lass, whilst you must do your duty by a husband, if you are clever you can get a lot of your own way by accommodating those needs. My first husband, God rest his soul, would do anything I wanted as long as I let him have his way and told him how skilled a lover he was, while I passed the time imagining I was with someone else!’ There was a burst of hilarity at this last comment.

  ‘Are we not supposed to enjoy it?’ asked Ailsa feeling a slut for even saying such a thing.

  ‘There’s nothing wrong with enjoying it lass, as long as he doesn’t see it. That gives him power over you and you don’t want that, you don’t want that at all.’

  So marriage was a battlefield, where you used whatever tactics necessary to outwit your enemy and gain the upper hand and Ailsa, unable to hide her desire for Duncan, was losing her battle and not just with her body, with her heart too.

  ‘Well I am married now, like it or not and I must resolve to make the best of it,’ she said. ‘And if Duncan Campbell tries to get the better of me he shall be in for a fight.’ She received approving nods from the others for this last remark. The Campbells, it would seem, admired a bit of spirit in their women and saw her defiance as a virtue and so she rose in their estimation.

  Despite having made some allies at Dunslair she still hated the place, it was oppressive and gloomy. She locked her door well at night and slept with one eye open even though she knew Laird Hugh would never let her be harmed. He was very attentive though she struggled to endure such dreadful company. As the vessel to carry his hopes for the future she was too valuable to let out of his sight and so the days dragged on interminably and she wished Duncan would return.

  Having made a stealthy return to Cailleach in the dead of night Duncan was camped out in the thick forest around the castle. The smoke from the fire caught in his throat as he sat near its warmth, sharpening a claymore to a vicious edge. Around him, men busied themselves with sim
ilar tasks to focus them on what was to come. They could not afford to make any mistakes.

  Scouts had been sent ahead on the road to hopefully discover the Sinclairs and draw them into attacking. Duncan had long been an excellent tactician and knew there were more important things in a fight than courage. Choosing where you met your enemy and having the element of surprise could tip the balance between life and death and Duncan intended to have both on his side.

  He had not wanted to leave Ailsa and thinking about her he felt a surge of lust and longing. Who would have believed that a filthy girl he had picked up out of the mud could have become such a passionate lover? The thought of her delicate hands on him, the way she felt under him, writhing in ecstasy, grabbing at his hair and clutching at his back in her need brought a wry smile to his face. He thought he was rescuing a helpless young woman in need of protection but instead, he had caught a wildcat by the tail.

  And he never stopped wanting her, longing to have his hands all over her. It was a sickness which had not been cured by marrying her and taking her to his bed. Now he wanted to possess her completely, body and soul, and nothing short of that would satisfy him. Duncan did not want to feel tender towards her and he certainly hadn’t set out to love her so even as the feeling swelled in his chest he wanted to reject it.

  Ailsa had not said the word to him and though he gave her pleasure he did not have a window into her mind. And yet here he was, her slave, loving her and unable to do anything about it.

  A clamour arose behind him and his mind snapped back to his men. There was tumult in the camp as a horse rode in, it’s rider hurling himself off at Duncan’s feet. His men swarmed around him.

  ‘The Sinclairs are found Laird, a strong force, heavily armed, just north of here.’

  ‘How many?’

  ‘Hard to be sure, I didn’t want to get too close in case I was discovered. But they are moving fast, this way and they were at least as many in number as us.’

  ‘Good, then the trap has been sprung and it is time to rid ourselves of this scourge once and for all. Ready yourselves, we leave at once.’

  Duncan tied back his hair and busied himself strapping on weapons, broadsword, dirk and targe. His pistols were loaded and ready and each shot must count for in the chaos of a fight there was little time to reload if his aim was not true. This for him was a well-honed ritual. His hands were steady and his mind clear for this time he had something worth fighting for beyond mere survival - a future with Ailsa.

  Ailsa had spent many hours getting to know Dunslair and not warming to it in the slightest. It had a vast, chilly grandeur about it and a pervading air of gloom and she felt vulnerable there without Duncan. It was as if the castle were some malevolent beast which resented her and sought to repel her as a stranger and enemy. Eventually, loneliness drove her to the solace of the chapel. In the fading light of evening, all was quiet there and she prayed fervently for Duncan’s speedy return, her thoughts wandering back to those last precious hours together. She heard someone come up behind her.

  ‘It is so good to see you Ailsa,’ came a familiar voice and suddenly, there was Hamish McDougall. ‘You are a sight for sore eyes,’ he said breathlessly, rushing up and taking her hands in his. ‘Lovely as always.’

  ‘Hamish, what on earth are you doing at Dunslair?’

  ‘I am here to deliver letters from my father to Laird Hugh. He wishes to build bridges with the man. Goodness knows why for that man is a villain. Beyond that, I have a further unhappy task Ailsa, for I have come to say goodbye. I am on my way south, to Edinburgh. My father is sending me to our relations there, that I may in his words, learn to become a man,’ he said somewhat bitterly.

  ‘Oh, I am sorry for it Hamish. I will miss you.’ Ailsa wondered what her old friend might have done this time to raise his father’s ire to the point of banishment to Edinburgh.

  ‘Come let us sit and I will tell you all the news and you must tell me yours.’

  They sat for quite some time together as Hamish recounted the exploits of his family and many of her old acquaintances. It was comforting for Ailsa in a hostile place surrounded by strangers to have a friend and a link to her past. Hamish made her laugh and she was pleased to see him. They both skirted around talk of Duncan and the Campbells and Ailsa was glad of that. Eventually, the chapel became colder as darkness fell and Ailsa felt she had better break off the conversation and let Hamish be on his way.

  ‘I should go, Hamish, for I will be missed at supper and Hugh is a vigilant jailor. He will send someone to find me and there will be trouble.’

  “I must make haste too for I have quite a journey ahead of me, though I wish I could stay longer. Unfortunately, Laird Hugh is not the most welcoming of hosts so I shall press onward tonight.’ Now, at their moment of parting, Hamish suddenly became very serious.

  ‘Ailsa I wish fate had been kinder to us. I wish you were not married to that brute Campbell.’

  ‘Hamish he is not like that. If you got to know him then you would see that he has many good qualities and is kind to me in his way.’

  But Hamish was not really listening. ‘I would rescue you from your plight if I could,’ he rushed on.

  ‘Truly, Hamish, I am content.’

  ‘Why don’t you come with me now? We can run away somewhere, start a new life together.’

  ‘Are you run mad?’

  ‘No I mean it Ailsa, every word.’

  ‘Truly, I do not need rescuing,’ she said, almost laughing with the absurdity of his proposal. ‘I am content with my situation and I am getting used to my new life. My future is here.’

  Hamish looked appalled. ‘That cannot be true, Ailsa.’

  ‘I am happy enough and as for running away with you, that is ridiculous. Would you have me live sinfully with you when I am wed to another? Would you have me abandon Cailleach and the people who depend on me? I belong with Duncan now.’

  To her horror, he suddenly took hold of her and kissed her ardently. Ailsa, embarrassed beyond bearing, squirmed out of his grasp, wiping his kiss away with the back of her hand. ‘Hamish McDougall what on earth do you think you are doing? And in the chapel too, shame on you!’

  ‘You love me Ailsa, I know it.’

  ‘I most certainly do not.’

  ‘There’s no need to be delicate about it Ailsa.’

  ‘Hamish, I am sure there are very many girls who are mad in love with you but I am not one of them.’

  ‘I don’t believe you.’

  ‘Listen to me, you fool, I am not in love with you. My feelings do not, and never have gone, beyond friendship.’

  ‘So what are you saying? You love Campbell now?’

  ‘I will not discuss my husband. Hamish, I am fond of you but that is all. Go to Edinburgh and make something of yourself. I wish you well, in fact, I wish you all the happiness in the world but you must go and forget about me because, this… you and I…will not happen. It cannot...because… I do care for my husband, very much.’ There, she had said it out loud. It was like laying down a great burden to acknowledge it.

  Hamish looked shocked, the thought that she would reject him had obviously never entered his head. Though Ailsa was infuriated with him she had no wish to hurt him. They were of a similar age but suddenly he seemed so much younger than her. She had done her growing up in the turmoil of the last year but apparently, he still had his before him.

  ‘Ailsa, I always thought that one day we would be wed. You led me to believe that you cared for me,’ he said indignantly.

  ‘I did no such thing. I never encouraged you and you never spoke to me of these feelings.’

  ‘I didn’t think I had to for you were always warm to me and you flirted and made eyes at me at Morag’s wedding. And when the Campbells took Cailleach and I came to you, your eyes lit up at the sight of me.’

  Ailsa was truly astonished by his arrogance. ‘You are mistaken, Hamish. If I unconsciously led you to believe that I had feelings for you then please know that I di
d not mean to.’

  ‘So you led me on for your own amusement and let me humiliate myself with my proposal.’

  There was an injured, whining tone to his voice that grated on Ailsa’s nerves. ‘I did not invite this piece of foolishness and you cannot, with any honour, propose to a woman who is already married! What you are suggesting is that I become your mistress and be dragged into a life of sin.’

  “I did it because I love you.’

  ‘Hamish, you do not know what that means,’ she said shaking her head.

  ‘I see,’ he said curtly. ‘So I throw my heart at your feet and you choose to stamp on it.’

  ‘Hamish…’

  ‘I must go whilst I still have some remnant of my dignity.’

  ‘Yes, that would be best.’ Ailsa pressed her lips together to stifle a laugh. He was so pompous, puffed up like a bullfrog, a picture of outraged pride. In spite of that, she couldn’t let them part this way.

  ‘I am sorry Hamish. I know that you meant well and please know that I have treasured your friendship these past years and hope to have it always.’

  ‘Of course you have my friendship Ailsa and I hope Campbell learns to appreciate his good fortune,’ he said through gritted teeth.

  He walked away and at the chapel door, he turned. ‘Forgive my impertinence,’ he said stiffly, grappling with his disappointment.

  ‘Nothing to forgive,’ she said mortified and trying not to show it.

  When he had gone she put her hands over her face, trying to compose herself to endure Hugh’s company at supper but smiling inwardly at the absurdity of Hamish’s behaviour. She wished Duncan would return though she resolved to tell him nothing of what had just happened. No matter his conceit, Hamish did not deserve Duncan’s wrath, nor did anyone for that matter.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Duncan reached Dunslair just before dawn. He had ridden hard, ahead of the rest of his men, exhausted but hopeful of a joyous reunion with Ailsa. But instead of being able to rush to her side he had been summoned by his uncle.