So Good

by Snow, Jenika

  “No trouble.” He shifted, looking a little uncomfortable, and I felt confusion fill me.

  “You okay?”

  He’d averted his gaze for a moment, but now looked at me. The expression he wore spoke volumes.

  Oh.

  He was going to try and kiss me.

  “Um,” I said and turned to face the front door, getting ready to unlock it. A kiss from Marcus wasn’t what I wanted or needed, even if he was a nice guy. “I better get inside.”

  Before I could open the door, I felt him move a step closer. I looked at him and saw him smile.

  “I see you a lot at school, but we don’t talk very much,” he said.

  I swallowed, feeling his desire for me pretty intense at the moment.

  “I like you, Ivy. I’d like to get to know you a lot better. Maybe we can go out sometime?”

  He reached out to maybe touch my arm, or pull me in close for that kiss, but before I could stop him, and before he made contact, the porch light turned on, and the front door swung open almost violently.

  I snapped my head in that direction, feeling my eyes widen as I saw Matthew standing there. His big body took up the entire entryway, the shadows from inside the house, coupled with the muted light from overhead, making him seem almost ominous.

  And his focus was right on Marcus.

  “Whoa,” Marcus said and took a step back, chuckling a little awkwardly. “You’re a big guy.” He looked between me and Matthew, and I could see the discomfort on his face.

  Matthew took a step out, his body so massive he commanded everything. He was shirtless, and the tattoos that covered his chest and arms, creeping up his neck, made him look even more dangerous.

  And still his focus was on Marcus.

  “It’s time for you to come inside, Ivy,” Matthew said without taking his gaze off of Marcus. “And it’s time for you to go home, son.”

  I glanced at Marcus, feeling uncomfortable with how tense the situation had become. Matthew was pissed, that was clear, and the dominance he threw off right now, as if he were trying to show Marcus that he was the alpha, was tangible.

  “Um,” Marcus said and glanced at me a little nervously. “I guess I’ll see you at school?” He gave me an awkward smile, glanced at Matthew once more, and then walked away.

  I stood there for a moment just watching him, saw him get into his car, and then pull away. I could feel Matthew’s gaze on me, like this heavy hand on my shoulder. I faced him, tipping my head back so I could look into his face. The shadows still concealed him, and the expression he wore was one I’d never seen before.

  He seemed upset, but I also saw ... need.

  I didn’t say anything as I took a step forward. He moved to the side to allow me entrance, and when he shut the front door, we were submerged in darkness.

  There was a lot I wanted to say, but right now probably wasn’t the best time.

  With one lingering look over my shoulder at him, barely making out his presence because of how dark the interior of the house was, I faced forward again. As I went up the stairs, I felt his gaze on me, following me, watching me the entire time. And when I was in my room with the door shut, I leaned against it and just breathed.

  But all I wanted to do was go right back down there and throw myself into his arms.

  * * *

  Matthew

  Possessiveness.

  Jealousy.

  Deep.

  Unrequited rage.

  I’d felt all of those things tenfold as I watched the little asshole walk Ivy up to the front door, as I heard him make his move on her, as I knew he’d try and kiss her.

  I wasn’t having any of that. No, fuck that.

  And so I’d acted like some kind of spurned lover, some jealous boyfriend.

  If anybody was going to have Ivy in all ways, it was going to be me. If anybody was going to know what she tasted like, felt like, sounded like as she moaned out pleasure, it would be me.

  Only me.

  I watched her walk up the stairs, could tell she was nervous, unsure of the situation. Hell, I was unsure of the situation. Because in that moment, as I saw her with another guy, the thoughts and images of them being together slamming in my head, the very idea that Ivy wouldn’t be mine had totally thrown every fucking bit of self-control and rational thought I had out the window.

  I couldn’t stay away.

  I wouldn’t.

  I’d have Ivy as mine, and fuck if it ruined everything.

  14

  Ivy

  I put the clean set of pajamas on the counter and shut the bathroom door, staring at myself in the mirror. My body felt ultrasensitive, the memory of the kiss I’d shared with Matthew still so fresh in my mind, on my lips. My mouth tingled, my body reacted. All it took was that memory to ignite me.

  I turned on the shower and waited for it to heat up, then got in, hoping the hot water might stave off some of this arousal burning within me.

  But the longer I stayed under the spray, the more my desire for him grew. And what a fucking shame that was, seeing as I wouldn’t ever be with him. He’d made that clear, told me we couldn’t be together. And I understood him, but I hated it. It felt like someone had ripped my heart from me.

  I shut off the water and stood there a moment, just letting the droplets slide down my body, the chill settle over my skin. Finally, I stepped out, dried off, and dressed, the clothing rubbing along my ultrasensitive skin, heightening my lust even further.

  How I wished I could be with Matthew, that I could at least talk to someone about how I felt. But telling anyone my feelings would be met with condemnation, disgust, judgment. No, I couldn’t even tell Georgia how I felt. I couldn’t admit it to anyone.

  I stared at myself in the mirror, the glass foggy, my reflection distorted. I lifted my hand to clear off the fog. I stared at myself for a second, feeling defeated, alone, and like a part of myself was missing.

  I opened the bathroom door, the built-up steam billowing out in this cloud in front of me.

  I could hear sounds from downstairs. I knew Matthew was just right below. Maybe if I went down there and demanded he stop hiding his feelings, he’d be with me. Or maybe I’d make a bigger fool of myself. Maybe I’d make things worse. And then I saw the light downstairs go off, heard him coming closer to the stairs. My heart started racing and I wanted to go to my room, to rush away, escape.

  I was nervous, scared to see him. Things had gotten so weird since the kiss, since he’d told me how he felt, and I to him. It was like he’d shut me out. It was when I heard the creak of the stairs and knew Matthew was coming up, that I found myself finally going to my room. But once I was there, I didn’t shut the door. I left it cracked, the darkness from the lack of light, the humidity and scent of the body wash I’d used filling the air.

  His room was right beside mine. He’d have to walk past my door to get to it, so when he was only a few feet away, I took a step back and held my breath. The door was still cracked, a small sliver of muted blue light from the window coming through.

  And then I saw him. He didn’t move past my door, and instead stopped, looking in my direction. Could he see me? Could he hear my heart racing?

  I took a step back as he came forward one. My heart was racing, my palms sweating. My body was hot then cold, repeating over and over again. Dizziness slammed into me as I saw him right there, pushing my door open. The shadows and moonlight spilled into my room.

  “You should be in bed,” he said gruffly, his voice low, almost inaudible. “It’s late.”

  I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t.

  He leaned against the doorframe. “I’m sorry about earlier.”

  All I could do was nod.

  “But I’m done fighting this.”

  Oh. God.

  He pushed himself away from the door and came toward me. He stopped when he was just a foot from where I stood, his massive body making me feel so small and feminine.

  “I don’t trust myself around you,
and so I’ve stayed away.” A wall of hard, warm muscle pressed up against my chest and a gasp left me. My vision had adjusted to the darkness, and I could see his gaze on me, the fact he had this heavy-lidded expression. The smell of him, the feel of his chest pressed against mine reminded me all too well of what I really wanted, of who was right in front of me.

  Desire rushed inside of me.

  "Ivy.” He said my name on a harsh groan, the scent of the alcohol he’d clearly been drinking lacing his breath. But it was like an aphrodisiac that heightened my hunger for him.

  His hands were gently wrapped around my upper arms, keeping me balanced, yet drawing me closer to him.

  I swallowed the lump in my throat. We didn’t speak, just stared at each other, the darkness wrapping around us like a blanket that blocked out everything, everyone. My lips were suddenly dry and my heart thundered. I licked them again, my mouth tingling as I thought about that kiss we’d shared, as I imagined doing it over and over again.

  I felt myself fall deeper and deeper into the web of arousal. Did he feel that unexplainable pull?

  “What’s going on?” I whispered. Whatever it was I didn’t want it to end. I wanted it to go further.

  He said nothing, just watched me. And then I watched him lower his head.

  Oh, God. Kiss me, Matthew. Take me.

  His lips were now a hairbreadth away from mine. The smell of whiskey swirled around me and seemed to make me intoxicated as well. That one beer and shot I’d had at the party had nothing on the smell of the liquor he’d drunk, on how it made me feel.

  “God, Ivy … how I feel about you.”

  How he felt about me? I couldn’t breathe, felt lightheaded, my desire like a living entity inside of me.

  “It consumes me. Confuses me.” He swallowed, his Adams apple working. “I want you for myself. The very thought of another guy talking to you, touching you, shit, even looking at you makes me want to fucking tear him apart.” He closed his eyes for a second, and when he opened them again, I got lost in the dark depths, in my feelings for him. “I love you, Ivy. I love you so fucking much it hurts to think of you not in my life. To think of you as not mine.”

  He lifted his hand and cupped my cheek, his palms big and warm, the calluses on his fingers from the hard manual labor he did making me feel feminine, soft.

  "I tried to stay away, to keep my distance, but it’s too fucking hard, Ivy. I’m going crazy not having you, not making it known you’re mine.”

  I sucked in a breath, wanting to say so much but the words failing me.

  He smoothed his thumb along my cheek. “It’s wrong to want you, my brother’s daughter, my niece.”

  I swallowed again. “Step-brother. Step-niece.”

  He closed his eyes again and shook his head, a muscle under his cheek ticking. “Semantics, Ivy. It’s wrong because I’ve watched you grow up, been your uncle, been your family.” He opened his eyes and a harsh grunt left him. “Yet still I can’t stay away from you.”

  “But I don’t see you as my uncle, not now, Matthew. And I know the way you look at me, how you feel for me, you don’t see me as your niece.”

  He made a deep noise in the back of his throat. “No, I don’t see you as my niece, not anymore, Ivy. I see you as a woman, as mine.”

  “I’m in love with you. I want you, want this.”

  One of his hands that had held my upper arm moved seductively down to my hand, over my hip, slid along my belly, and stopped right above my pussy. I held my breath.

  He leaned in a little bit closer, our mouths so close now. He cupped my pussy, pushing the material of my linen pajamas into my cleft and causing me to rise on my toes.

  “Tell me what you want,” I asked boldly.

  “I want you, Ivy. I want you so fucking bad I ache inside.” He took possession of my mouth then, his searing kiss leaving me breathless. His tongue was like silk against mine, and his hand was like fire between my legs.

  With his hand between my thighs, pushing the material of my pajama pants up, I couldn’t think straight, let alone stand on my own. I gripped his biceps, holding on, letting the pleasure course through me.

  “I’m going to have every part of you until you know you’re mine,” he murmured against my mouth. He leaned back an inch, with his hand still tangled in my hair, and breathed against my mouth. “Damn the consequences, Ivy.” He kissed me again, harder this time, and I melted into him, loved that he held me so tightly, so thoroughly.

  “Matthew,” I moaned against his lips.

  “I’ve tried to fight how I feel for you, tried to stay away.” He pulled back an inch and shook his head. “It’s no use. I love you too fucking much to stay away.”

  “I love you too,” I whispered.

  He rested his forehead against mine. “How often have you thought about us together, baby?”

  God, could I even be honest with him? “So many times,” I whispered and leaned up to kiss him, to stroke my tongue along his lips. I felt Matthew’s body harden against mine, felt the stiff outline of his dick press against my belly. I was wet, drenched.

  I was ready for him.

  “Ivy,” he groaned, grabbing a chunk of my hair and pulling my head back gently. For a moment all he did was stare down at my face, this look of pure adoration filling his expression. And then Matthew lowered his mouth and started kissing and sucking at my throat, ran his tongue up the length of my neck, and then stopped at the pulse point right below my ear.

  I closed my eyes, not able to keep them open as pleasure coursed through me.

  Matthew was breathing heavily, the thick length of his erection pressing against my belly, over and over again as he thrust against me. He was so big, so hard for me. I might have been a virgin, but I knew what I wanted, and that was for Matthew to take me irrevocably, to be consumed by me and devour every inch of my body.

  I felt drunk from his touch and kisses, and wanted to be so far gone with the feel and taste of Matthew that nothing else mattered, not the repercussions, not the threat that diving into this forbidden love affair could have serious and disastrous consequences.

  I didn’t care in that moment because I loved Matthew too much.

  Matthew started kissing me again, grinding his massive erection against my belly harder, fiercely, like he couldn’t get enough, and all I could do was hold on and take it all.

  “Matthew,” I moaned. “Tell me what you want.” I needed to hear him say it.

  “All I want is you.” He held my face in his hands, tilted my head to the side, and stroked my lips with his tongue. “Only you.”

  I let my head fall back slightly and closed my eyes once more, loving it when he started stroking my skin with his thumbs, gently, softly, as if he thought I might break. “Then be with me, Matthew.”

  This growl of need left him and he pulled back to stare down at me for a few seconds, almost like he was struggling with himself about what he should do, if he should stop this before it even got started.

  “We deserve this,” I whispered.

  Despite the chill in the air, I was overheated. My nipples were hard, my panties soaked. I was too worked up to even try and act like I wouldn’t be pushed over the edge if he blew in my ear.

  He said nothing, didn’t move even more. I reached out and flattened my hands on his chest, smoothed them down, and stopped at the button and fly of his jeans. My hands started to shake at the thought that I was about to be with the man I loved, that he would be moving so hard inside of me. I actually felt lightheaded from it.

  But before I could undo his button, he took hold of my hands and brought them up to his mouth, kissing my knuckles.

  God, don’t stop this.

  “Matthew.” I breathed out his name, feeling my hands tremble even harder now. “Don’t stop this,” I said out loud this time. I wanted to give him everything, wanted to be able to pleasure him as much as he would surely pleasure me. But I knew nothing about sex, was so inexperienced it was laughable.

&nbs
p; He pulled me close and stared into my face. Even in the darkness I saw his nostrils flare and this possessive, dangerous look cover his face.

  “You’re mine.” I leaned in close. “No one will ever know how you feel but me.”

  I licked my lips and nodded.

  Before I knew what was happening, clothes were tearing and being tossed aside. It was like an animal was let free inside of Matthew and he let it out, let it be feral.

  Matthew had his hands on my hips as he backed me up until the edge of the bed came in contact with the back of my knees. I couldn’t breathe, and my knees felt so wobbly, my legs so unsteady.

  I slowly lowered myself to the bed and stared up at him, seeing his massive body dominating the space around us, between us. He leaned forward and braced a hand on the bed beside me. We breathed the same air for a second, and then he was kissing me again.

  He groaned against my lips, his tongue stroking mine, his actions fierce as he mouth-fucked me. And that’s exactly what he was doing, as if he were too unhinged to control himself.

  “Your virginity, innocence, is mine.” He stroked my lips with his tongue, and moved his hand down my chest, teasing the edge of my breast before moving down my belly. He stopped when he got to the top of my pussy, the heat and heavy weight of his hand on my mound wringing a gasp from me.

  I stared up at him, my lips parted as I waited for him to touch the most sensitive part of me.

  “Your pussy is mine, Ivy. No one will know how hot and tight you are, how this virgin pussy feels clenching as you come.”

  I felt that truth deep in my body, and knew without a doubt he meant every word. The low throb that had been present between my thighs now became a fierce pounding that demanded to be noticed.

  “If only you really knew how I feel for you, that you hold the key to everything that is me.” His voice was low and filled with heat. “If you only you knew that I’d take down anyone who thought they could take you from me.”