by Meg Jolie
“Okay,” I muttered to myself. “Where could they have gone?”
Mom didn’t have many friends to speak of anymore. She did very little with her family. I couldn’t imagine where she could be on a Friday night. Not this late, not with Tyler when it was after his bedtime.
I made my way into the kitchen, hoping for a note. There was none. My phone was where I’d left it on the counter earlier in the day. Maybe she’d taken him to a movie. It was a special night, his last game. So maybe she’d taken him out to dinner and a movie to celebrate.
I swiped my phone up and turned it on.
My heart rate had begun to slow now that I’d managed to come up with a reasonable scenario.
The movies. They could definitely be at the movies.
As my phone powered up, it began to chirp at me announcing one text message after another.
“What in the…”
At a glance I realized I had dozens of missed calls.
Something was definitely not right. My heart somersaulted and my hands began to shake. I had several missed calls from Noah, Caleb, Riley and Aunt Aubrey. I hurriedly scrolled through the text messages. The ones from Noah said I should call Riley ASAP, as did the one from Caleb. The messages from Riley and Aubrey insisted that I call them immediately.
My knees became limp and I leaned against the countertop.
The doorbell peeled through the house. The sound was so unexpected that I let out a little shriek of surprise. I had an instant sense of déjà vu. A ringing doorbell, a man in uniform at the door, a tragedy.
“No.” The word came out sounding less like a word and more like a keening sound.
“Emory?” Riley’s voice shouted from the other side of the door. She began pounding.
I forced my feet to move.
Not a man in uniform.
But something horrible had happened. I knew it. I could feel it.
I reached the door in a haze. When I pulled it open, Riley pushed past me.
“Where have you been? Everyone’s been out looking for you! You should answer your phone!” She punctuated her statement by bursting into tears.
“Mom and Ty?” My voice didn’t even sound like my own. I asked, but I wasn’t sure that I even wanted to know.
“Em, there’s been an accident.”
I stumbled backward, my backside hitting the wall.
Riley reached for me. “Come on. You need to come with me.”
Riley led me to her car. She was texting as we hurried along. “I’m letting Mom know we’re on our way.
“What happened?” I demanded as my feet began to move again.
“They were in a car accident. No one else was involved.” She stopped as we both hurriedly got into her car. When she backed out onto the street, she continued. “Your mom was conscious when they brought her in but she was freaking out. She completely lost it when they rolled Tyler past her. They had to sedate her. Tyler,” she took a deep breath, “he lost a lot of blood. His femur is broken in two places. He was going into surgery when I left. We’ve been looking for you for hours. I managed to track down Caleb because I thought you might be with him. He told me he thought you might be with Noah so I called him. They’ve both been out looking for you.”
I nodded, numb. “Ty lost a lot of blood?” A horrible vision of my sweet little brother, drenched in his own blood, took up residence in my mind. I shuddered.
“He had to have a transfusion,” she clarified.
I sucked in a sharp breath. I wondered if we were the same blood type. I’d give him every last drop of blood in my body, if he needed it, if it would help him get better.
“When did this all happen?”
“Around six.”
That was four hours ago.
“Where were you?” she demanded.
“At the river, at this spot were Evan used to go.”
“Why did you run off like that? That’s not like you.”
It all seemed so insignificant now. “Noah showed up. Apparently he didn’t take our break up seriously. He found out about Caleb. I’m not sure Noah’s ever going to speak to me again. And Caleb, he pretty much told me it’s over. He doesn’t want anything to do with me either.”
“Poor Noah. I mean,” she quickly said, “that just…that had to be a shock for him. But Caleb?”
“Apparently I’m not as important to him as he led me to believe.” I didn’t want to talk about me. “Mom and Ty, are they going to be okay?”
She was quiet as she drove. I glanced at the speedometer. She was concentrating on the road but she was going well over the speed limit. I watched as she chewed on her cheek. She pulled her eyes away from the road long enough to give me a sympathetic glance. “I hope so,” she finally said. “They’re both stable, so that’s a good sign right?”
“What do you know? What happened?”
“They think,” she cleared her throat, “that your mom had been drinking. But she wouldn’t do that, would she?”
My stomach lurched.
Until now, I’d been numb, in shock. Tears burned behind my eyes. If I had just gone to the game…if I hadn’t run off to feel sorry for myself…I would have been there to make sure she didn’t go anywhere with him.
“I don’t know why she’d take Tyler anywhere,” I muttered in response.
“She said she was taking him out for ice-cream,” she explained.
“How did you find out?”
“A police officer showed up at your house.” The words couldn’t have hurt more if I’d been sucker punched in the stomach. History wasn’t supposed to repeat itself. Not like this. “When no one came to the door, they checked with your neighbors. Someone knew that my mom and your mom were sisters. Mom got a phone call…,” She faded off.
I realized my breathing had turned into an incessant whimper. I couldn’t do this again. I couldn’t bury another family member, go to another funeral. I tried to grasp onto Riley’s assurance that Mom and Ty were both stable.
“…I’ve been driving around but swinging by your house every fifteen minutes or so,” I heard her say as I returned my attention to her. “When I finally saw your car there, I was so relieved.”
She nodded toward my phone. “You should let Caleb and Noah know that I found you. I’ve kept in touch with them the last few hours. They’re both going a little crazy.”
I looked down, surprised to see that I was still clutching my phone in my hand. “Yeah, okay,” I muttered. I shot off quick texts to each of them, simply letting them know I was with Riley.
Within seconds, my phone buzzed with incoming texts.
Caleb: Let me know if you need anything. Anything.
Noah: So sorry, Em. Hang in there.
I didn’t respond to either. I didn’t know what there was to say.
“I know now isn’t the time but soon, you’re going to have to tell me what happened. When I got a hold of Caleb, he said that he thought you were with Noah.” She turned to me and quirked an eyebrow. “But when I tried calling Noah, he wouldn’t answer. I finally sent him a text telling him there had been an accident and I needed to talk to you ASAP. He called me back immediately but said he hadn’t seen you.”
Her entire statement sounded like one big question.
I pressed my palms against my burning eyes. “I can’t get into it now.”
“Right. I know. So, um, okay. Mom and I were trying to keep our phone lines open in case you called, but the last text I got from her said that Ty was out of surgery—”
“Can I see him? Will they let me in to see him?”
“I don’t know. Mom is in with your mom. She’s still sedated. The car rolled. There was some other traffic but luckily it didn’t hit anyone else. They called for help right away. Your mom has a concussion, a sprained wrist, some bruised ribs.”
“Why is Ty so much worse off?”
“He wasn’t wearing his seatbelt.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose. He was pretty good about remembering to put it
on, but he did sometimes forget. If he was excited about going to get ice-cream, his seatbelt was probably the last thing on his mind. She should’ve checked with him. She should’ve reminded him. No, actually, she never should’ve been in the car with him in the first place.
As angry as I was with her, I knew I was partly at fault for this as well.
I should’ve spent less time being angry with her, blaming her. I should’ve done something to help her. That’s what Caleb had been urging me to do all along. I’d been too stubborn. In that way, I felt like this accident was just as much my fault as it was Mom’s. I was guilty of looking the other way.
Sure, I’d tried talking to her a few times. But I hadn’t tried hard enough. I hadn’t made her listen. I should’ve made her listen.
I had been so worried about protecting Tyler. And now, because of my negligence, he was lying in a hospital bed.
Chapter TWENTY
Something brushed across my cheek. It startled me awake. I jumped in my chair, my eyes flew open wide and my heart banged against my chest. My hand flew up to brush it away and instead clamped around warm, familiar fingers.
“Sorry,” Noah whispered. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”
He gently tugged his hand away from mine. My fingers twitched near my cheek until I dropped them into my lap.
“It’s okay,” I said. I squirmed around, straightening out in the chair that I’d slumped down in. My neck ached and my back felt stiff so I stretched. My gaze swung to Tyler. He was still asleep. The doctor had told me he would probably sleep through the night. He had come through surgery just fine. He now had a metal rod in his leg. He would be in a lot of pain when he woke up. I wanted him to stay asleep so that I knew he was comfortable…But I wanted him awake because until I heard his voice, I wasn’t sure that I’d believe he was going to be okay.
The doctor’s cautiously optimistic words had alleviated the terror I had felt. Now I was just anxious. I wanted to see Ty’s big green eyes. I wanted to hear him laugh.
“I brought this for Ty.” Noah’s voice was barely above a whisper. He held up a remote control monster truck. A Get Well balloon was tied to it.
“Thanks,” I said as I tried to blink myself awake. I watched as he walked over to the windowsill and set it down. The curtains were drawn but I could see gloomy, gray clouds in the gap between.
I glanced at the clock. It was a little after eight. It had been close to two by the time I’d fallen asleep. I’d checked in on Mom briefly and spoken with my Aunt Aubrey. After the doctor had talked to us about Tyler, she’d tried talking me into going home with her.
There was no way I was leaving Tyler’s side. Not until he opened his eyes.
Noah hesitantly moved toward me. His hands were stuffed into his pockets. His expression was wary.
“Did you want some company? I thought maybe you could use a friend,” he said. “Unless you don’t want me here. I don’t want to intrude. I mean, if you’re expecting someone else.”
A friend…At least he was willing to be that much to me.
“I want you here.” I wanted to crawl into his arms. I wanted to tell him how sorry I was. I wanted him to forgive me. More than that, I wanted to back up this whole, horrible, insane week.
He took the seat next to mine and silence filled the room. My gaze stayed glued to Tyler’s face. He had a few cuts from flying glass. Thankfully, none of the cuts were too bad. He looked peaceful. The sound of his breathing calmed me.
“He’s going to be okay, right?” Noah asked.
“Yes,” I said firmly.
“And your mom?”
“She’s going to be fine too.”
“Good. I was worried about you last night. When Riley said they’d been in an accident…I was so scared for you. She didn’t know how hurt they were at first. She just told me that it was bad. I didn’t want you to have to go through this all over again. I’m just really glad they’re going to be okay,” he said.
“Thanks. I’m sorry you had to go out looking for me.” I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to gather some courage. When I finally turned to face him, he immediately dropped his gaze to the floor. “I’m actually sorry about everything. I never meant—”
He held up his hand to stop me. “Don’t. I can’t,” he shook his head. “I can’t talk about that right now. I can’t even think about it. I want to be here for you because I know you need someone. I don’t want you to be alone. But I just can’t go there.”
“Okay,” I whispered.
It took awhile before I could bring myself to look at him again. Even though we weren’t speaking, it helped to have him here. His presence meant more to me than he could imagine. When I finally let myself take in his appearance, my heart nearly burst.
I had been fooling myself thinking that I would ever get over him. Despite everything that had happened, he was everything to me. He’d hurt my feelings. He’d made me feel insecure and I’d been desperate to drown out that pain.
I realized it was only because I loved him so much that his words had hurt me so badly.
In the process, I’d hurt him. Yet, here he was, sitting with me because he didn’t want me to be alone. Because that was the kind of person he was. He was honorable to a fault, even when someone wasn’t worthy.
“Noah?” I said quietly.
He pulled his gaze up from his lap. The pain in his eyes cut through me. I wondered what it was costing him to be stuck in this room with me after what I’d done.
“Thanks,” I said, “for staying with me.”
He simply nodded and dropped his gaze again.
A few hours later, Riley made an appearance and Noah left, apparently feeling as if his duty was fulfilled. There was no hug goodbye, or a promise to see me later. He left with just a few mumbled words.
“That was awkward,” Riley said once he was gone. She was tactful enough not to press for details under the circumstances.
“It was nice of him to sit with me,” I said. “I’m kind of surprised that Caleb hasn’t come. I thought he loved Ty like a little brother. I thought he’d be here.”
“He was here,” Riley said.
I shook my head. “No, he wasn’t.”
Riley nodded. “He was. I’ve been with him. When I got here, he was standing in the hallway, leaning against the wall. I asked why he hadn’t gone inside. You were in here with Noah. Caleb didn’t want to cause any trouble. We’ve been in the waiting room. I finally talked him into going home. If I’d have known Noah was going to leave, I would’ve told him to stay.” She wiggled her phone at me. “I promised to call him with any updates.”
“Thank you,” I said as I tried to wrap my head around the fact that Caleb had been here all along.
Riley hung her head a moment before looking up at me. “I don’t know if I should tell you this or not, but I’m going to. I know you said you weren’t important to Caleb. You’re wrong. I’ve been talking to him for the last few hours. I think Caleb’s feelings for you are stronger than he wants to admit. I think he loves you enough not to hold you back. That’s why he told you to go after Noah. He wants you to be happy. He thinks Noah is the one that makes you happy.”
“He said that?”
“More or less, yes.”
I realized Riley was probably paraphrasing. Possibly even twisting Caleb’s words into something that they weren’t. I shrugged and moved to the side of the bed. “It doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is this guy right here.”
I picked up Tyler’s hand. It was cold and felt so tiny in mine. I was careful not to disturb his IV.
“Emory.”
My gaze flew to the door.
“Dad?”
“Oops,” Riley said from beside me. “I was supposed to tell you that Mom called him. I meant to tell you he’d be here soon. I ended up in the waiting room and I forgot.”
My father looked haggard. I found that oddly pleasing. Maybe I shouldn’t have been surprised that he was here. But I was.
“Any changes?” he asked as he edged his way over to Tyler’s bed.
“No,” I said curtly.
I watched in silence as he took in Tyler’s condition. He was wearing his usual dark dress pants and button down shirt. His clothes were wrinkled, rumpled. The effect seemed out of place on him. He was always so put together.
I hadn’t seen him since Evan’s funeral. Apparently, he only showed for family tragedies. I was tempted to say something sarcastic about him managing to fit us into his schedule. I held my tongue because even though I was upset, I knew this wasn’t the time or the place.
When he spoke again, I regretted my decision.
“Your mother is going to pay for this,” he said quietly.
I slowly released Tyler’s hand and placed it by his side. I was afraid I’d squeeze it too tightly in my anger. I felt Riley’s hand land on my elbow.
“Excuse me?” I said. Of course I furious with my mother. But my father had become a stranger to me, to his family. Regardless of whether or not my Mom was guilty, and she undoubtedly was, I didn’t feel as though he had the right to say a word.
“She had better hope and pray that Tyler has a full recovery.” He raised his eyes to meet mine. I wasn’t sure what emotions I saw there. Anger was the most prevalent, but after that, I wasn’t sure what to make of him.
“Why are you even here?” I asked.
“Why do you think, Emory? My son is in a hospital bed.”
“How good of you to only pay attention to us when tragedy strikes. You know, you can blame Mom if you want, but where have you been?”
“Not out drinking, that’s for damn sure,” he replied.
“I guess I’ll have to take your word for it. I mean, it’s not like you’re around enough for me to actually know. Let me rephrase that. It’s not like you’re around here ever.”
“I think I’m just going to…,” Riley motioned toward the door. I watched as she slipped out of the room, then I pulled my attention back to my father.
“I didn’t come here to fight with you,” he said. “In fact, if you can’t be civil, you can leave. I didn’t spend half the day in a car so that I could listen to your attitude. I’m here and I’m going to spend this time with my son. I’d prefer to do it without having to listen to you and your attitude.”