by Dee, Bonnie
Oh, right. There was no future, because in less than a month they’d all scatter in separate directions and rarely see each other again. But before that happened, Josh would find out what they’d done, and all three relationships would be destroyed.
Eric set his fork down at last. “I’m done.”
Brianne stood and stacked the plates and silverware. “Want to go in the hot tub for a while or kick back in front of the TV?”
“I should probably go home.” Eric sounded half-hearted even to his own ears.
Brianne set the plates back down on the table. She lifted her palms like scales and weighed his options. “Go home to an stuffy apartment and sleep alone on a lumpy hide-a-bed, or hang out with Brianne in air-conditioned comfort in front of a big screen TV, then have wild monkey sex in her queen-size bed on Egyptian cotton sheets? Decisions, decisions.”
Eric scratched his chest and gazed at the flickering candle surrounded by wilting flowers. “I guess I could stay for a little while.”
Chapter Four
Over the next few days, he learned how truly weak his will was. Every morning he’d tell himself he’d end this affair with Brianne, but by the end of the workday he’d head to her house. He was mere steel fillings and she a powerful magnet. Now that his long-hidden passion was out, it devoured like wildfire. He wanted Brianne more every day.
Every time he thought of her, saw her, listened to her laughter, or pushed into her hot, willing body, he couldn’t picture his drab life with her not in it.
It was some small comfort that she seemed just as captivated by him. Made him feel a little less pathetic.
One day she even showed up at the house where he and Carl were ripping out old carpet and dragging the rolls to the back of the van for disposal.
It was close to ninety degrees outside. Eric’s T-shirt was molded to his perspiring body and his hair plastered to his head with sweat. He knew he smelled like an armpit and looked like a vagrant.
Wearing a white sundress edged in lace, Brianne stepped out of her little green sports car, her red hair piled loosely on her head, a cherry Popsicle in one hand. She sucked it as she walked toward Eric.
He frowned at Carl, ogling the shape of her body outlined through the thin material of the dress. “What are you doing here?”
“I followed an ice cream truck and ended up here,” she said. “Thought you might be hot.”
“I’m working.” He glanced at the house. The owners weren’t at home. Who’d care if he took a break?
“This won’t take long.” She extended her hand with the melting Popsicle toward him. “Here. Suck.”
Carl laughed. “Not touching that one.” He dropped his end of the roll of padding in the driveway. “Have fun. I’m going around back for a smoke.”
“Hurry. It’s melting all over my hand.”
Eric grasped her wrist and sucked the sweetened ice into his mouth. He stared at Brianne’s mouth. Her lips were bright red from the dye and pursed as though she were sucking the Popsicle with him. Desire raged through him like some kind of sickness. He could hardly see he wanted her so bad.
When he let go of her wrist, Brianne flung the Popsicle underneath the nearest bush and launched herself at him. She flung her arms around his sweaty, stinky body and plunged her cold, sweet tongue into his mouth. Eric gripped her so tight she let out a little squeak and lifted her off her feet to carry her to the van.
She wrapped her legs and arms around him and held on like a baby monkey.
He pulled his mouth off hers and panted, “You sure about this? I’m disgusting, and the van is an oven.”
“Don’t care. Wanna fuck you now!”
He grunted and heaved her onto the rolls of old carpet and padding in the back of the van. Brianne hitched her sundress up, revealing bare pussy underneath.
“Christ, you’re going to kill me,” Eric rasped. He dove into the van and pulled the door closed behind him. The smell of synthetic fibers and dust rose from the makeshift cushion as he landed beside Brianne.
Brianne reached for his fly, fingers fumbling in their urgency to get the button open. He pushed her hands aside and quickly released himself from denim and underwear. He pushed apart her thighs and feasted on the sight of her glistening pussy.
Damn, he couldn’t imagine ever not be turned on by her. He pinned her down and pushed inside with one hard thrust. She was steaming hot and wet and... Fuck, he’d forgotten a condom. He pulled out, meant to stop, but couldn’t resist another thrust. She felt so good around him. He withdrew again and asked, “Condom?”
“I’m on the pill. And I haven’t been with anyone but Josh. What about you?”
“I’ve never been with Josh,” he joked then answered, “No one since Amber. I’m clean.”
“Then let’s just do it.” She dug her fingers into his ass cheeks and pulled him back inside.
Sweat rolled down his face as he panted and thrust. Brianne was sweating, too. Her carefully tousled hair grew damp and strands clung to her red face. The temperature in the van had to be almost a hundred degrees, and they melted like the Popsicle into sticky puddles.
Brianne arched toward him, matching his frantic rhythm, wrapping her legs around his back and holding him close. She gasped “Oh. Oh. Oh!” on a steadily rising note. Suddenly her eyes flew open and “Ohhh!” rang out in the enclosed space.
Eric pumped into her like a piston. Her inner muscles massaged his cock and drew it ever deeper. His tension and heat ratcheted up to an unbearable degree then abruptly broke, unfurling in long pulses. Lights shimmered behind his closed eyelids. He thought he might have a stroke, or pass out from heat exhaustion.
He collapsed, burying her under his weight, and gulped for non-existent oxygen. Brianne wriggled beneath him.
“Off!” She released him from the iron grip of her arms and legs. “You’re smothering me.”
He rose to his knees, looking down at her ruined white dress and rumpled hair, her cherry-stained lips and the dark wells of her eyes gazing back at him.
“Glad you made time for a break?” she asked with a smile.
“It was unexpected. Amazing.”
She sat up and smoothed her skirt down. Pulling the pins from her hair, she finger-combed it so it hung free over her shoulders. “Coming over again tonight?”
Eric thought of the promise he’d made that morning. End it before you get in any deeper. End it before Josh gets back. “Sure. I’ll be there.” That night and every night until this crazy thing had to end.
After watching her drive off, Eric walked around back to find Carl just stubbing out his joint. His brother applauded. “You are whipped, but that’s a damn fine pussy to be whipped by.”
“Shut up.”
* * * *
Eric hadn’t known there were increasing levels of guilt. Deep. Deeper. Deepest. The more time he and Brianne spent together, the more he wanted her to be his for a lot longer than summer break. And the stronger his feelings grew, the guiltier he felt.
Yet he managed to forget about Josh for hours at a time when he and Brianne made love, floated in her pool, took a shower together, played video games or just hung out watching dumb reality TV. When he held her in his arms at night as they slept together in her big bed, he could imagine this was their house and they would live together in these golden moments forever.
The night before Josh was due to arrive home, Eric went to see Brianne once more. Just to wind things up and say goodbye, he promised himself. No one last time of having sex. No matter how she seducd him, he would resist. It was way past time to end this relationship that had no future.
But when she opened her front door and smiled at him, his will began to crumble. “What’s up? How was your day?”
He shrugged. “It was a day.”
“I’m grilling mahi mahi. I can start it now if you’re hungry or save it till after a swim.” She rested her hands on his shoulders and rose on her toes to kiss him. He wasn’t a tall guy, but Brianne was so sho
rt she made him feel like he was.
Eric kissed her back, then steeled his will and took her arms, gently pushing her away. “I’m not here to stay.” The words stuck in his throat. “I just came by to say goodbye and thank you for…this summer. For everything.”
“You going somewhere?” Her tone was clipped and cool.
“You know with Josh coming home this thing between us has to end.”
“I knew what you meant, idiot.” Her glare burned him.
“He can’t ever know what we did. Both you guys will leave soon, and there’s no point in ruining our friendships because of this...summer fling. It’s not as if it was ever going to grow into anything.”
Her eyes burned even darker, and her lips pressed tight. “Sure.”
“Please, don’t be pissed.” He slid his hands down her arms to grasp her hands. “I want us to stay friends. I wish things were different and we could really be together, but our time was coming to an end anyway, and don’t you want us to all part as friends?
Brianne threw her arms around him and stopped his explanations with her mouth.
He instinctively returned the kiss and slipped his hands around her waist and up her back beneath her shirt. He couldn’t imagine never touching her like this again. He backed her against one of the pillars that supported the portico and scooped his hands under her ass, lifting her up. Her legs wrapped around his waist and she sucked his tongue so hard it hurt, but he didn’t want her to ever stop. At last, she pulled away to stare at him with her beautiful brown eyes.
“You want to end it like that?” she whispered. “One last kiss goodbye?”
It was a taunt and a challenge. Could he walk away with a shred of composure or dignity left?
“Or like this.” She rocked against him, rubbing her crotch against the bulge in his jeans.
Eric groaned and bent to kiss her throat, her chest. He pushed into her, his erection pressed painfully against the seam of his jeans, but he welcomed the pain. He was so in tune with Brianne now that her slightest look or touch made him immediately ready for her—anytime, any place, any moment. How could he pull off pretending nothing was different between them in front of Josh?
Blood pounded rushed in his head and his entire focus became this moment. In a moment, he would unfasten his fly and pull aside her panties, and then… But first he buried his face in her cleavage, kissing and licking her soft flesh. His single pointed concentration was the only reason he could imagine later for not hearing the approach of a car on the driveway. He didn’t pull away from the swell of her breasts until the sound of a car door opening cut through his deafness. He tore his mouth from Brianne and swiveled his head.
Josh stood beside his car, staring at them.
Josh was the one who’d been wronged, but Eric’s world detonated. He’d fucked it up, ruined his friendship, and he wasn’t someone who had too many friends. “Fuck,” he muttered. Fuck, fuck, fuck! You’re back too early! You’re not supposed to be here. You shouldn’t have seen this.
Josh stood for a moment as if deciding what to do next, whether to say something or climb back into his car and run them over. His mouth opened then closed, and he shook his head, dark bangs flopping over his forehead.
Brianne made a soft sound of protest and unwound her legs from around him. Eric set her on her feet and stepped away. With his hands open at his sides in surrender, he turned toward Josh. “I’m sorry, man. So sorry.”
His stomach churned, and he couldn’t breathe, as if he’d been punched in the gut. The look in Josh’s eyes was worse than anything he could have imagined. “I’m sorry,” Eric repeated, because what else was there to say?
“Eric, stop apologizing.” Brianne’s voice was cold. She stalked past Eric toward Josh. “Why do you even care? We’re over, right? You said we should break up when we leave for college, then you disappear for almost four weeks. Just drop off the face of the earth. I figured we were starting early.”
Josh’s face was pale. He closed the car door and walked toward her. “You’re right. I should have called or at least texted. I was doing a lot of thinking about long-distance relationships, and finding out what it would be like next year not to see you or talk to you every day.”
“Guess you found out, huh?” She crossed her arms, her body nearly shaking with indignation.
“I learned I missed you.” He frowned. “Guess you didn’t miss me.”
“Things change, Josh. Sometimes really fast.”
He looked at Eric, then back at her again. “Yeah. I can see that.”
Eric felt instantly like a third wheel again as they talked about him but didn’t include him in the conversation, as if he were no more than a prop in their drama.
“Fuck you, Josh.” Brianne’s voice was thick. “Stuff happened while you were gone. I needed you to help me through it and you weren’t there. I won’t feel guilty about finding comfort with someone else. Besides, weren’t you the one who said we should experiment a little? So I tried something new.”
“I didn’t mean Eric!” Josh yelled and thumped his fist on the roof of the car. “And I was talking about next fall when we’re meeting new people.”
“Did you wait? Or did you have your own little experiment in Boston?”
“No,” he said flatly. “I didn’t.”
Eric was an invisible observer in a nightmare, unable to do anything but watch. Josh should be busy accusing him of being a backstabbing son of a bitch, but instead Eric seemed to be superfluous to their argument.
Then, suddenly, Josh brushed past Brianne and strode toward him. “And you. Jesus! I can’t believe it. How could you fucking do this to me?”
Like an actor finally given the cue he’d been waiting for, Eric was almost relieved to deliver his line. “I know. I have no excuse. I’m so sorry.”
“Have you been wanting this, wanting her all this time?” Josh’s eyes were slits of anger. “Were you just waiting for me to be out of the picture? Did you fuck her?”
Eric shook his head, not in denial but because he couldn’t choke out his next line. He didn’t even know what it would be other than I’m sorry yet again.
Josh’s eyes went wide. “You did! You fucked her. Jesus Christ!”
Brianne came up beside Josh. “It was my choice. I wanted to be with him. There was no ‘fucking’ of anybody unless it was him by me, so stop acting as if I’m some kind of toy he took away from you.”
Josh stared back and forth between them for several seconds. “Screw this!” He stalked to his car and got in, slamming the door a couple of times. The engine roared, and the car peeled out of the driveway, leaving black tire tracks on the white cement.
Brianne watched him drive away before turning to Eric. “Don’t! Stop looking like a kicked puppy. Josh will get over this. You know he can’t stay mad at you—or me either. Just give him some time to cool down.”
“What we did was wrong, Brianne.” His legs felt like they might collapse beneath him. “You trying to put a spin on it doesn’t change that. We cheated.”
She rubbed the furrow between her brows and sighed. “I didn’t mean to make such a mess. I didn’t really let myself think at all. It’s like when I’m power shopping. I see what I want and I get it. Nothing stands in my way. Not price, or other shoppers, or some snippy salesgirl telling me she can only get the dress in tangerine when I want curry yellow.” She gave him a rueful smile. “I’m selfish like that.”
It was hard not to be a tiny bit happy she’d desired him so single-mindedly. But awareness of the ruin of his friendship with Josh washed over him again, erasing any joy. Added to that was the fact he and Brianne were through. That passionate kiss had truly been their last. Indulging in farewell sex would only make everything worse. Brianne was leaving. He was staying. And if they were very lucky, each of them might find some way to patch things up with Josh before the last days of summer were over.
Eric looked down into her dark chocolate eyes. “Thanks. I know what we did was w
rong, but it was also really good. So thanks, for this summer. I’ll never forget it.”
He turned to walk to his truck and she didn’t try to stop him. But she called after him. “It’s not over, Eric. We need a little time to think, but all of us care for each other too much to let our friendship end like this.”
Chapter Five
Within a week, Eric was ready to shoot himself. The mind-numbing labor of his dead-end job, the fact Josh wouldn’t return his calls or texts, and that it took every ounce of his will not to try to talk to Brianne, all combined to throw him in the deepest funk. And he deserved it, every bit of it, for what he’d done.
He started smoking a lot of dope with Carl and his friends, Rob and Maurice. At least it passed the time in the evenings. Eric could float away into a laid-back fog of not caring so much. One night, when he realized he was sitting around the living room in his underwear, sucking on Carl’s bong and actually finding Rob’s lame jokes funny, he knew he’d hit rock bottom.
That night he dreamed he was stuck in a block of cement that was slowly hardening around him. The more he tried to move, the faster it solidified. Across a vast, empty parking lot he saw the small figures of Josh and Brianne waving to him as they walked away.
When he woke, he was sweating and trembling. He lit a joint to calm down. It didn’t take a genius to figure out the obvious symbolism. Only a few more days before Josh left for New York. Not long after, Brianne would be gone, too. What about Eric? What would he be doing next week? The week after that? Next month? Next year? And why was he such a fucking sad sack that he couldn’t seem to do anything to improve his situation? Was this some genetic flaw he’d received from his mysterious father?
Eric’s eyes stung and not from the smoke. He dug the heels of his hands viciously into his eyes sockets. Brianne was right. He was a crybaby. He had to either change his life or quit whining about it.