Distract Me

by M. J. Berterman

  “I don’t know...I met him Friday and have seen him every day since.” I pretended to read a worksheet so it wouldn’t sound like a big deal.

  Her eyes grew larger.

  “You just meet someone Friday, and you’ve seen them every day this weekend? I’d say they are pretty perfect if you couldn’t go a day without seeing each other!” She spoke a bit louder with surprise. “Moving pretty fast there, Adi.” She adjusted herself in the chair.

  “I was just available and so was he so we made plans.” I shrugged.

  She didn’t know about the parole hearing on Friday since I didn’t want to talk about it much with anyone. She cried once with me when I told her the story of my mother, though. We haven’t spoken about it much since then. She’s always been so nice to me and has always been an ear to listen when I needed her. I had the urge to tell her more of the wildness of this weekend because I haven’t seen Mariella a lot lately, and I needed to vent.

  “I know it’s quick, but I just can’t get enough of him... I mean he’s so...” I whispered as a knock on my door interrupted me.

  We both turned our heads to the back of my classroom. Trent was standing at the doorway. Why was he coming into my room now? Shouldn’t he be busy with his third-grade class? I shouldn’t be so mean since he is a nice guy, but he has been flirting and bothering me to have dinner with him the past couple months, but I always manage to come up with some kind of excuse to say no. It’s not that he’s not attractive. All the faculty women here find him gorgeous. His dark blond hair, green eyes, and his strong build are a fit for most. I’ve thought about it—trust me. Great. Now I feel bad, but I didn’t want to get into any kind of coworker romance and have it end badly here. This was my first real job after college, and I didn’t need that kind of drama to ruin it for me.

  “Hey, Trent. Come in.” I smiled.

  Janie looked back at me and rolled her eyes.

  “Someone might get jealous,” she whispered back.

  “We will talk about it later.” I grinned at her as she stood up.

  “Well, I have to head out to get my kids from special. I’ll talk to you later.” She winked.

  I rolled my eyes as I flipped through papers on my desk, so I didn’t have to look up at Trent. He was now standing over my desk.

  “Can I help you with something?” I asked. “I really have to leave in a few to get my kids from lunch,” I added, hoping it would cut him short of whatever he had planned to discuss with me.

  He stood with his hands in the pockets of his gray dress pants. He did smell nice too.

  “Just checking in with you. How was your weekend?” He clears his throat. “I missed you Friday,” he continued.

  I stopped shuffling through my papers and looked up at him.

  “Yeah, I had to take a personal day to take care of some family stuff,” I added, but I wasn’t getting into any details with him.

  “Well, if you’re not busy this Friday, do you want to watch the baseball game at Lenny’s pub. A few of us are going over there after work.”

  His teeth were a perfect white. I smiled back at his contagious grin. He knew I had shut down any plans that were just with the two of us, and now he’s trying for a group date thing. I felt guilty all of sudden, and he looked so innocent just standing there. What could it hurt? I thought. I shot him down so many times that I felt bad. If I went, I could probably talk Janie into going too.

  “That sounds fun. I should be able to go.” I stood up and walked him to the door. “I have to go get my class from lunch, but I’ll see you Friday.” I gave him a small smile.

  “Great. I’ll see you then.” He walked down the hall to his classroom.

  I was thankful he didn’t catch me talking about Ryder to Janie. The hours passed quickly after lunch and before I knew it, the dismissal bell rang at three-thirty. I had no time to catch Janie up on our conversation earlier, so I’d have to tell her tomorrow.

  Stretching, I packed my papers in my bag to go home. I needed a coffee to keep me up for the rest of the evening even though I was sure Ryder wouldn’t have a problem helping with that. I had about an hour before I had to meet Ryder out front, and I was getting impatient. Keeping myself busy was hard to do right now. All I could think about was him. As I washed my boards and filled in the schedule for tomorrow, the sound of shoes shuffling on the floor behind me made me turn around. Trent again. He was standing in my classroom now. How long had he been watching me before I heard him? Weird.

  “Hey, Trent. What’s up?” I turned back to writing on my board.

  He sat down at my desk and watched me write. I started to feel a little uncomfortable with his eyes on me.

  “Nothing. I just wanted to stop in before I left for the day.” I continued writing because I wanted to finish soon so I could get outside to wait for Ryder.

  “Well, I’m just finishing up my schedule for tomorrow.” I hoped he would get the hint that I didn’t want to do small talk right now and he would leave.

  “You look really pretty today, Adi.” I stopped writing for a few seconds as the compliment sunk in.

  He’s flirting with me again. He’s relentless.

  “Thanks...You’re too sweet, Trent.” I started writing again.

  “I try.” He stood up from my desk and walked over to me.

  I didn’t want to make eye contact with him because he felt too close for comfort, so I just continued writing. The warmth of Trent’s body next to mine made me uncomfortable. He stood there looking into my eyes. I didn’t feel anything. His face leaned into mine as he licked his lips. I pulled back before he could touch my lips with his.

  “Trent, I...” I whispered as I looked down at his wet lips.

  Before I could finish the ‘I’m not ready to date or have any relationship at work speech,’ I was interrupted by a deep cough echoing from behind me. It was too far away to be Trent. My head whipped around so fast to see who else was behind me. I felt overwhelmed that my room was becoming too crowded. My dry erase marker fell from my hand and to the floor when I saw Ryder standing behind us. He had a tense look as he looked at Trent and then at me. Shit. I didn’t want him to come in here and start the twenty questions with my coworkers about who he was to me. I swallowed hard.

  “Ryder,” I whispered.

  I was in shock he was standing in my classroom. How long had he been standing there? He looked sexy in his black dress pants with his gray button up shirt. His sleeves were rolled up again showing off his forearms, and his tie had a detailed charcoal pattern. My hands wanted to reach out and pull him by his necktie. I couldn’t tear my eyes from him. Ryder walked over to me without hesitation. He bent down to pick up my marker. I watched him carefully stand back up never taking his eyes away from me. I grabbed the marker from his fingers, and he kissed me softly on the lips.

  “Hey, beautiful. Are you ready to go?” He completely ignored the fact that we had company.

  “Well, Adi, I’m going to get home. Sorry about that. I, umm... I’ll see you tomorrow.” He reached out his hand for Ryder.

  For a moment, I was afraid Ryder would ignore him, but after a slight pause, Ryder extended his hand in return.

  “Ryder, this is Trent, my coworker.” I waved my hand between the two of them.

  It all felt too awkward between the two. Really, I wasn’t sure what to call Ryder. We only just started talking this weekend even though things have gone really fast between us. There still wasn’t really a title for it yet. Trent smiled at Ryder. For a moment, I watched Trent and realized he had a very attractive smile. His entire face lit up, and I wasn’t sure why I never noticed it before.

  “Well, it’s nice to meet you, Ryder.” Trent walked toward the door, and I felt less panicked as he was leaving.

  “Oh, Adi, I’ll let you know more about Friday night,” he said as he poked his head back into my room.

  Damn. He had to mention it in front of Ryder. I nodded and looked at Ryder. I noticed Ryder’s body shift as his should
ers tensed up and he looked down at the floor. My plans with Trent really weren’t any of Ryder’s business if I had to be truthful. Right now, I didn’t even know what we were, and I didn’t need to answer to him yet.

  “I’m ready when you are.” I smirked at Ryder.

  “Who is that guy and why did he apologize?” He pulled me into his arms and kissed my head.

  “He’s a third-grade teacher here.” I shifted my bag higher on my shoulder. He just looked at me like he was waiting to hear more, but I didn’t have anything else to add.

  “What’s Friday night?”

  I felt my cheeks turn red. Why did I feel nervous about telling him? I pulled away from him to grab a few papers I had missed on my desk. Just tell him. It’s not a big deal, I thought.

  “Trent invited me to the pub to watch the baseball game with a few of my other coworkers.” I shrugged it off.

  “So...you do know that he’s into you, right?” He smirked.

  I pretended to tuck my papers into my book, taking a little longer than necessary. I didn’t want to look him in the eye because I didn’t want to tell him the truth.

  “I’m not aware because we’re just friends.” I hissed.

  I didn’t want to tell him of the numerous times I’ve turned Trent down for a date because I didn’t want him to question me about him anymore. I wasn’t into Trent, and that’s all that mattered. If Ryder didn’t come in here, I’m not sure what Trent would have tried with me, but I do know I would have stopped him because my feelings weren’t the same.

  “Well, if I didn’t come in here, he was probably ready to make a move on you, right here, in your classroom.” He laughed.

  I briefly wondered if he saw Trent inching toward me for a kiss before he walked in, but I had to brush it off. It wasn’t a big deal, and I could take care of myself. He reached out, ran his fingers down my cheek, and then rubbed his thumb across my bottom lip.

  “Ryder,” I whispered. My body relaxed at his touch, and the shock of him showing up here wore off. He needed a dose of his teasing ways, so I licked his thumb as he played with my lip. It must have driven him crazy because he leaned in and kissed me hard. He backed me up against the chalkboard. His hands latched onto my chin and neck to pull me closer. Things were getting too passionate in here, and I was afraid to be caught. I needed to catch my breath, so I pulled his hands away and gave him a quick kiss.

  “Well, I’m glad you came in and made a move on me instead.” I smirked, and he laughed.

  “Come on. Let’s get to my apartment.” He grabbed my hand, and I turned out the light to my room.

  He must have a roommate because this apartment is ridiculously huge. I think his entry way is bigger than my entire apartment. My eyes were overwhelmed by the walls that surrounded me. I couldn’t take it all in that fast. Black framed pictures were hanging on the white walls. Not much color illuminated them—only from the scale of white, gray, and black. I was surprised he could pick out such beautiful flowers because his taste seemed kind of bland—or lack of.

  “Your apartment is very nice and very big... It’s huge,” I said as I walked around taking it all in.

  Maybe it was just a guy thing. Maybe they only need essentials in their space. He put his keys down on his black sofa table before walking toward his open kitchen. The kitchen was decorated the same, all white with stainless steel appliances. He must have a cleaning crew come in here because there is no way a guy can keep a big space like this so clean. His kitchen island is for sure bigger than my queen mattress.

  “Thanks, I try.”

  “Do you have a roommate?” I asked, but I didn’t see any signs of one yet.

  I prayed he didn’t because the thought of him laying me across that white granite counter top did cross my mind. It was big enough for the both of us.

  “No, I live alone. Do you want something to drink?”

  “Sure, I’ll have water, please.” I put my bag down on the floor next to the row of stools in front of his kitchen island. Watching him move around his own space made me comfortable. He slid a glass of water across the island, and I caught it between my fingers.

  “Thanks.”

  He nodded and began pulling out several ingredients from his fridge. I wondered if he was going to make something too healthy or fancy for me. I hoped not because I was starving.

  “I thought we could grill since it’s such a nice day. Do you like burgers?” He must have read my mind.

  “Yes. I like that idea a lot.” I laughed.

  “What did you think I would make you eat...like fish eggs or something?” He smirked.

  “I had no idea, but I’m really glad you’re not.” He threw a linen napkin toward my face, but I caught it.

  “Really? Linen for burgers?” I threw it back.

  “I guess I can’t impress you with linen napkins.” He walked around the island and stood next to me.

  “I can think of other things you can do to impress me.” I turned to face him and ran my fingers down the buttons on his shirt. He had grabbed my hand before it reached for his belt and I pouted.

  “I have plenty of time for you to show me after you eat. You’ll need the energy,” he said against my lips.

  I could feel the warmth between my legs. We haven’t had sex yet, and I knew I couldn’t last another night of just oral with him. Don’t get me wrong—it was amazing, but I needed more of him. The urge to go further was definitely building up, and normally, I wouldn’t be sure if I wanted to just yet. But I’m just so pulled to him, and since the moment he first distracted me, I’ve felt safe with him.

  “Sure.” I smiled and pushed him away.

  “Do you need help with anything? I can prepare a garden salad,” I asked.

  As he held his hands out, he said, “My kitchen is all yours so help yourself, and I’ll go grill on the balcony.”

  I began chopping lettuce, tomatoes, and the green pepper while I watched him stand outside on his balcony. He was gorgeous, and I was beginning to feel too lucky to be here with him. It felt too perfect for how my life goes—I knew it was only a matter of time before something bad would happen. I hated feeling that way, but I was afraid to be happy because it would be ripped from me.

  Dinner was delicious, and I was hungrier than I thought. We talked some but mostly ate. I probably wouldn’t have had any energy for him if I had thrown myself at him earlier. He asked me about my day with the kids, but I didn’t ask him about his. I just didn’t want to hear the details of another family struggling the way I did the day of the parole hearing. I knew how that day went for me, and I felt selfish, but I didn’t want to relive it again.

  Cleaning up the kitchen was effortless because he didn’t make much of a mess cooking. Mariella and I always created a disaster while cooking in our small kitchen, and we waited hours to even start cleaning it up. Maybe it was his age. He was a bit older than I was, and I guess with that comes more experience, as he had said before. I didn’t want to think about the fact he had most likely been with more women than I had men, but from the little insight I’ve had he was definitely experienced. Hoping our age difference wouldn’t get in the way of things. I helped him load the dishwasher as I continued our conversation from dinner. He asked me so many questions about my parents, Chase, and his girls through dinner. It was nice to relax and talk about the good in my family with him. He didn’t add anything about his family at all, though, so it piqued my curiosity that he was hiding something.

  “So do you see your parents often or have any siblings?” I asked nervously. My question didn’t bring any emotion to his face like it would have mine.

  “I don’t see my parents much. They’re always traveling for business,” he said as he placed a dish on the lower rack.

  “What kind of business?” I asked but hoping I wasn't too nosey.

  “My father owns a life insurance company and meets with his top clients all over the country, so my mother just goes with him. Well, she’s really his partner, so she
has to.” He continued rinsing off a bowl.

  “It must be nice. They get to see each other so often.”

  “Yes, I just wish they appreciated each other more.”

  I sensed his family was more distant than I thought. He dried his hands on a dishtowel and continued. “You’d be surprised. You could see someone every day and not know a thing about them,” he said in almost a whisper.

  I saw the sadness in his eyes, and it made me feel bad for bringing it up.

  “Well, I’m sure he loves having her around,” I said as I pulled at my thumbnail.

  “Well, I know having you around makes me happy,” he said as he smiled.

  My body wanted to melt into him as he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer to him causing me to blush. He kissed my cheek and then under my earlobe, and it sent chills down my side. I continued talking as he kissed me. He wasn’t getting out of my questions just yet. I needed to know more about him.

  “So I told you about my brother, Chase. So do you have any siblings?” I mumbled through kisses.

  “No, I don’t...” He stopped kissing my neck. “Well, I did at one time, but not anymore.” He paused then kissed down my neck. The strong urge to pull away overcame me because I was confused by his response. I closed my eyes as his kisses sent warmth through my body as I decided to lean into him more.

  “I’m sorry. You did have a sibling?” It was so hard to concentrate on our conversation with him kissing me so tenderly.

  I knew I was being too pushy, but I wanted to know more about him. My thoughts were interrupted by his body abruptly pulling away from me. He slammed his hands on the island so hard it made me jump. I crossed my arms and put my fingers over my mouth to silence myself from letting out a gasp. He scared me.

  “Ryder... I’m sorry, I didn’t...” I spoke so softly because I didn’t want to upset him more.

  My eyes never left him. He just looked down at the countertop with his head hanging down in silence, and I knew I had upset him. I knew things were going too good. I had to go and ruin it with my stupid questions. Guilt overcame me, and I didn’t have any words to help him, so I just leaned over him from behind and held him.