Enchant Me

by Anne Violet

  “Michelle, you are coming to my party tomorrow night, right? Go ahead and invite your brother and his college friends too. It will be fun.”

  Letting go of my arm she swung around to face me. Her blues eyes looking angry. “Alexis, I know something bad went down between you and Christian but partying and going boy crazy is not going to make it better.”

  “How do you know, have you ever tried it?”

  She stared hard at me like she was actually stunned that had come out of my mouth. Sometimes I think she considered herself more of a mother figure to me than friend, even though she was only a year older. You would think that with her large extended family, an older brother and two younger sisters, she would have plenty of opportunities to exhaust her maternal side, but apparently not. After a moment her eyes turned soft and considering.

  “How badly did he hurt you?” she queried softly.

  I felt my façade shake for a moment before I regained control. ‘I’ll live,” I said and turned to go back into class, “I’ll email you directions and the time.”

  I could feel Jim and Michelle’s glances throughout class. Worse, I caught them glancing at each other like they were planning some intervention. I wasn’t surprised when Jim caught up with me at the end of class as I headed to the parking lot.

  “Regardless of what happened between you guys, I know he really cared about you. Maybe you just need to sit down and really hash this out,” he said softly, concern evident in his voice.

  “Always the diplomat,” I retorted, maybe unfairly.

  I started to walk faster to get to my bike and out of here, away from all the pity and helpful advice. Jim matched my pace and tried to catch my eyes but I refused to look up and since he was a good mid-western gentleman he didn’t force it.

  “Alexis, I’m a guy. I know he does.”

  I gathered my patience before I spoke. “Listen Jim, I appreciate it. No, actually that’s a lie, I don’t. Please leave it-- what’s done is done.”

  His lips compressed together as he watched me shove on my helmet and get on my bike. “If you need to talk we’re here for you.”

  I shoved down my visor so he wouldn’t see me roll my eyes. He and Tina were not individuals anymore. They were a we, an us. And I was all alone. After school I was bombarded by requests to come to my party. During dinner my mom had started to get suspicious at how much my phone was ringing and I finally turned off my ringer until I could be in my room to deal with it. Making the effort to talk but not really communicate with my mom was exhausting. I was supremely grateful when dinner was over and I could escape to my room. Logging on to my computer, I checked my email and it was slammed with appeals to go. It was almost tempting to start charging for entry and just let everyone come but I knew that technically I really just wanted to have fun with no drama attached, well… minimal drama.

  With homework done I finally turned out the light and flopped onto my bed. Cody eventually jumped up and padded over to me, happily sprawling on my chest. Within minutes he started purring and making paws with his little sharp nails; muffling my yelp, I lifted him up, dragged the comforter underneath him and then lay him back down. He didn’t seem as satisfied with the arrangement but that was too bad. As we lay there communing with each other, the feeling that someone was watching me crawled over my skin. Even though my curtains were closed, I still had the sensation someone was near my window. What freaked me out more was the fact that Cody seemed to sense someone too. His ears had rotated around and he jumped off my chest and faced the window.

  If it had been just me I could have passed it off as being paranoid, but knowing Cody’s hearing was better than mine… I started to feel panicky. Quite honestly I wasn’t so sure it was Christian this time. I crawled over the end of my bed so I could approach my window from the right side. Slowly I moved my curtain aside and peeked out; seeing no one, I crept over to the left side of the window and peeked out from there, still nothing. Finally I walked to the center of the window and gathering my courage, yanked the curtains wide open.

  All I saw were trees. I sighed loudly; I had been more scared than I wanted to admit. Jerking the curtains back in place, I crawled into bed and tried to not see Christian on the back of my lids as I fell asleep. When Friday arrived warm and sunny, it was like a benediction upon my party. For the first time I was the most popular girl in school. I was still being inundated with requests; some even tried to bribe me. Superficially I enjoyed it all, but deep down I knew that none of those particular people were real friends or cared one bit about me.

  By lunch time, I was already sick of the falsity of it all and arranged for Tina to take Becca and I to her house for lunch and almost wished I hadn’t. We sat around Tina’s butcher-block-topped kitchen island, eating sandwiches and chips, quiet for the time being. I had been mostly absorbed in melancholy thoughts until I felt the combined weight of their concerned stares and I ignored it for as long as I could. That wasn’t long, considering my mood. I felt restless and dissatisfied like nothing in the world could ever make me happy or content again. Then in turn I would berate myself for not appreciating what I did have. It was becoming just one big negative cycle and I found myself almost hating Christian for it.

  “What?” I finally blurted out, staring first at Becca’s brown eyes then to Tina’s almost black ones. “Are you sure about tonight?” Becca asked.

  “Yeah,” I said shrugging my shoulders. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

  “I just don’t want you to get in trouble if somehow your mom or grandmother finds out.”

  “They won’t. I told my mom that I am staying with my grandma Ann and since they don’t talk, mom won’t even know that she isn’t home.”

  It was interesting that Tina seemed to be letting Becca carry the conversation, and when I looked at Tina piercingly for a moment, she ducked her head like she was embarrassed about something. Great, apparently Becca had elected herself speaker for their mutual concerns for me. As much as I appreciated their love, I was starting to really hate their pity.

  I watched as Becca shook out her long curly red hair behind her like she was preparing for battle and then she eyed me from across the island. “I still think you should go to prom.”

  “I am,” I said as I wadded up my trash and threw it away. Becca threw a glance at Tina in confusion. Tina looked at me with pleased bewilderment. “Since when?”

  “Since last night.”

  “Who are you going with?” she asked in excitement. I shook my head and stood up in preparation for us leaving. “No one.”

  They followed me out the door and to Tina’s car. Their confusion was a palpable thing. “You know my cousin Ethan that goes to UW?” Becca asked.

  I nodded at Becca waiting for her to get to the point. “You’ve met him before. He said he would have no problem being your escort to prom. He’s coming to your party tonight too, so you could talk to him about it then.”

  It took a couple of moments staring at Becca before I calmed down enough to form a coherent reply. “One, I don’t want nor need either of you to find me a date--ever! Two, I do not desire a date for prom in any way. I will be too busy making sure everything goes smoothly. Understand?” I demanded, getting into the back seat and slamming the car door behind me.

  “Yes,” Tina piped in immediately, glancing at me in her rear view mirror to check how angry I really was.

  There was only the barest grumble of agreement from Becca. I guess that didn’t surprise me since, of all my friends, she was the most boy crazy and probably couldn’t understand for the life of her why I wouldn’t want a date.

  Back at school, outside the door of my yearbook class, I was waylaid by both Kirk and Michael. They didn’t understand how they weren’t invited for the party. It was actually kind of funny watching them try to jockey for a spot. I was already late to class, and I could see Michelle leaning way back in her chair to look at me, hinting to hurry it up. Mr. Agostini seemed to already be doing roll call, so I used that as
an excuse and left them to fight it out behind me.

  When I stepped through the doorway to class I felt the back of my neck start to tingle; glancing back I saw Christian at the entrance of his class staring at me with a sort of savage look in his dark eyes. I repressed my instinctive shiver and closed our door. I couldn’t stop thinking about that look. Not as I got dressed for the night, not as I put signs along the path at my grandmother’s house to lead everyone to the fire pit, and especially not as the night fell and the only light was that of the fire. It wasn’t fear that I felt, it was more like-- intrigue, excitement.

  As I watched the bounce of my friends’ flashlights as they made their way up the hill, it occurred to me that I shouldn’t feel anything. He probably meant nothing by it. But I decided for tonight I would rather believe that it had meant something so I could have one night where I wasn’t torturing myself with what-ifs. Forcing a smile to my face, I walked up to greet my guests. While Jim was occupied talking to Michelle and her boyfriend, Tina pulled me away. By the way her eyes were lit up I had an idea of what it was about. I smiled at her obvious happiness.

  Once we were on the other side of the fire where we could talk privately but she could still watch Jim, she turned to me. “He kissed me last night.”

  I smiled more broadly. “And how was it.”

  She looked at me surprised. “It was amazing of course,” she exclaimed, giving me an unnecessary elbow into the ribs.

  I privately snorted at the fact she was insulted that I could think anything else.

  “I think I am falling in love with him,” she said in a hushed tone like she was confessing a sin.

  “There’s nothing wrong with that. I’m so happy for you.”

  “Thanks,” she replied, barely able to contain her smile. “So have you seen any one interesting yet?”

  “Not yet but the night isn’t over yet,” I replied playfully and pushed her back in Jim’s direction. “You better head back over to your man. It looks like he’s about to circle the wagons and come searching for his little lady.” She glared at me but wasted no time getting back to her man.

  It was a great party, all things considered; we had food, music, and ambiance. I should’ve been happy if not for myself then at least for everyone else. Unfortunately I only felt jealousy as I looked around and saw the shining happiness on Jim and Tina’s faces, the calm connection that Michelle had with her man, Becca’s delight with the two dates she had brought for the night, and all the other myriad couples that were here. I felt wrong-- like I didn’t belong here and I started to edge back towards the woods when Becca’s cousin Ethan walked into our little clearing and headed straight for me.

  He was more attractive than I remembered, short red hair, built like an athlete. He was smiling warmly as he walked up. Abruptly Jaime, Michelle’s older brother, stood in front of me. I blinked up at him in surprise. Lord, he was tall, at least six foot one if not more, his long and dark hair pulled back in a ponytail. The glint in his eyes wasn’t one I was sure I trusted as he held out his hand to me.

  “Would you care to dance?”

  I glanced at him suspiciously; he hadn’t seemed to notice me in any way other than one of his little sister’s friends until now, huh…. “Sure,” I said cautiously.

  He led me away from Ethan to the other side of the fire and took me in his large arms. I was almost amused by the safe and proper distance he kept between us. By virtue of being friends with Michelle I suppose I was off limits. Which then begged the question of what was he up to. I glared up at him trying to catch his eye but he was studiously looking away. When the song ended and I prepared to step away, he gently drew me in again, dancing to the next song that had come on and still keeping on the opposite side of the fire as Ethan. I caught him giving a warning glance to Ethan, but warning him of what, I didn’t know. Jaime wasn’t even interested in me. I was getting tired of whatever game was going on so I stomped hard on Jaime’s foot to get his attention. He actually laughed in a deep booming voice before he looked down at me.

  “What?” he asked with humor in his voice and a very mischievous look in his blue eyes.

  The thought occurred to me that I should be feeling completely obsessed with Jaime. He was undeniably handsome, maybe one of the most classically beautiful men I had ever seen, but I felt nothing towards him. I found I preferred brown eyes to blue, intelligence and mystery compared to Jaime’s what you see is what you get, and someone who was comfortably tall, but not a freakin giant.

  My patience finally snapped. “What are you, my damn babysitter?”

  He didn’t look down as he laughed at me again. “Do you need one?”

  That was it! I could play games too. I let my hands drift down from his neck, over his chest and down his abs. He glanced down sharply at me warning me not to go any further. Feeling empowered by recklessness, I slipped my hands under his shirt, flattening my palms against his hard stomach and watched as his eyes kindled. He seemed to be struggling internally with whatever agenda he had, but I now had his complete attention.

  “What do you think you are doing?” he grumbled.

  “You first,” I demanded, and then watched as his eyes left mine and focused at some point behind me.

  He leaned down close to my ear but his voice still boomed out around me. “Don’t you have a boyfriend?”

  I prepared to tell him in no uncertain terms I did not, when I felt that tingle on the back of my neck… That was my only warning.

  “Yes she does.”

  Jaime released me and walked away. This time I was unable to stop the little shiver that went through me. There was a wealth of emotions in Christian’s low voice that I couldn’t even begin to place. As I turned to face him, I felt that shock of awareness between us, the compulsion to be close. He looked beautiful and dangerous in a black coat, button up shirt and dark jeans but it was his eyes that drew me. His dark eyes were almost black in the night, flickering with jealousy, desire and pain. As I tried to fathom why he was here and what he wanted, he reached out, grabbed my wrist, and pulled me around the fire and back down the path. I could sense the emotions seething through him, but was beyond perplexed as to the reason why. I followed in stunned and intrigued silence. Still unspeaking he cut onto another path that would lead to the waterfall and creek which was a good distance from the fire pit.

  Eventually we reached the waterfall and he pulled me under a weeping willow tree, its branches gently swaying open and closed as we passed through. Swinging me around, he pressed all of his weight against me from chest to toe against the trunk of the tree. I should’ve been angry at his attitude but I was too fascinated by him.

  “What the hell do you think you are doing? Have you forgotten that you are supposed to be mine?” He roared.

  I realized this was why he had walked us so far away from everyone else. I also realized I could be blisteringly angry and fascinated with him at the same time.

  “Have you forgotten that you broke up with me?” I challenged.

  I swear I could hear the cracks in the dam of his control, break wide open. His dark eyes flared with emotion just as he shoved his hands in the length of my hair, cupped the back of my head and drew me to him. I barely had time to register the new direction our exchange was taking before I felt his lips crash down upon mine. It reminded me so much of our first kiss, desire, devotion and needing someone so much it hurt.

  All my questions took a back seat to desire. His lips seemed to feast upon mine, ravenous and devouring. They were so warm I imagined that I literally melted into their embrace. I gasped as he nudged my head back and trailed my neck with kisses, only to reverse the path with the dampness of his tongue on the way back up. His lips brushed against mine again before I felt the rough texture of his tongue as it traced my bottom lip, then dipped inside to caress my own. The words ‘I love you,’ hovered on my lips but I didn’t speak them. Slowly his hands drifted down, caressing my neck, then over my shoulders and arms until he reached my thi
ghs. Without breaking our kiss he gently gripped them and lifted me up in his arms and I wound my own arms tightly around his neck and my legs around his waist. I wanted him--more than I had wanted anybody and more than I think I could want anyone in the future.

  Sinking my hands into his midnight hair I kissed him back with all the love I felt, and bit by bit I felt the tension that had held him, leave. Our kisses became languorous and soft. I couldn’t stop caressing his neck, down his shoulders and then trailing up his back, and along his arms just to turn around and start all over again. I couldn’t get enough of him. As his body became warmer, it released his cologne into the air around me. I felt surrounded by him, body and soul. If time had ever stood still for us, it was this moment… I could almost hear the ticking of my watch slow, the rustling of the willow tree go quiet, and the burbling of the creek rush to a halt.

  Breaking the kiss, I opened my eyes and pulled away a little; startled by the quiet. Abruptly, as if I had broken some spell, all the sounds and movements of the world around us came rushing back in. The sensation was so shocking I shuddered with pain. Then I realized it wasn’t that at all. It was a vision, more intense than ever before, knocking on my head demanding entrance. I could hear Christian talking to me asking me if I was ok but he sounded so far away. The temptation to fight it was strong but something told me I would regret it if I did. So I let it in…