Double Play

by Grace, Hazel

  This shit...is not happening right now.

  This shit is going to just add to more of the upheaval of every emotion that I’ve tried to keep buried deep within me.

  “Coach Colson Hayes,” he continues, stopping a few safe feet in front of me. “Has a nice ring to it.”

  “What the fuck are you doing here?” I growl, gripping the baseball bat I’ve had in my hands for God knows how long. I’m surprised I haven’t noticed and used it on Ben already. But now I have a perfect reason to use it, a really good excuse to swing it into a motherfucker who’s on my fucking field.

  Gavin Sheston stands in front of me, cocky, amused, and going to be fucking bleeding in two seconds if he doesn’t get the hell out of here.

  “Came for nostalgic purposes and parent-teacher conferences,” he answers simply. He looks at Ben. “Benny-boy, how are you doing, buddy? It’s been a long time.”

  “Doing fine,” Ben says cautiously. He knows that I’m about to lose my shit and probably that, since I have a weapon in my hand, he needs to make sure we all tread lightly right now. “School’s that way.”

  I see Ben’s index finger point at the building, but that’s it. My feral sights are set on the boy, now man, who betrayed me.

  Maybe I betrayed him first, I’ve thought about it over the years. He had the balls to date Sawyer when I didn’t want to chance a thing with my future. I held her hand, but that’s all we did when they were dating.

  But he stole her away from me when she was mine, more than likely filling her with shallow words and promises while I was ignorant to the whole thing.

  Curiosity always played a factor since I left—were they still together? Did they break up again? I never got into social media to look. I didn’t want to destroy myself all over again.

  Gavin chuckles and nods. “Yeah, I know where the school is at. I hear that Sawyer Boyd is working here.” His eyes narrow in on me. “How’s our girl doing?”

  My jaw locks, the mention of her from his lips kicks my bitterness and hatred into overdrive. Memories flood my brain to the point where I can’t stand in front of him. Me, Colson Hayes, wants to vanish in the sights of my old best friend because I can’t endure the thoughts, the keepsakes that I try to hold when it was just Sawyer and I and no one else.

  Until it was someone else.

  “If you’re trying to start shit,” Ben chimes in, taking a step toward Gavin. “You can get the hell out of here.”

  Gavin holds his hands up in silent surrender. “Not starting anything, it’s just been a while.”

  “What are you doing here?” I repeat, my voice sounding possessed, low and deep. I can’t say that I own this town, because we both were born and raised here, but I can say this is my damn baseball field and no one else's besides Coach Henderson, the girls’ softball coach.

  “Here to see how my stepson is doing in school,” Gavin discloses. “Well, soon-to-be stepson.”

  “You’re getting married?” Ben blurts.

  Gavin rolls his shoulders. “Possibly. I hear he might be suspended for a game, won’t look good.”

  A mirthless snort leaves my lips. “The hell do you know about scouts, Sheston? You were too busy fucking everyone over.”

  “I know that if you licked the administrative assistant’s pussy real good, she’ll get you into college and fuck around with some scholarships.”

  “The hell are you talking about?” Ben voices. “You went to New York.”

  “I was planning on going to New York. But I ran into another redhead and, well, I must have a thing with them.”

  “No one gives a shit about what you’ve done,” I leer, swinging the bat to my side. “But you should give a shit about getting off my fucking field.”

  Gavin tsks. “What are you going to do? Lose your job by hitting me and run back like a pussy to Cali?”

  “Nah, I’m going to bury you in this field, then lose my job and fuck your mom before I leave.”

  “Like I ate your mom’s pussy when I was sixteen and you were sleeping in—” I step forward, we’re done here. I’m going to bludgeon this motherfucker into the ground and piss on him before I bury him alive.

  Ben’s arm snaps out in front of me like a mom who’s stopping their child from crossing the street. It doesn’t slow me down, I’m on a mission of tearing him into pieces with my bare hands, fuck the bat.

  “Hey, hey,” Ben clucks, stepping in front of me, his hands on my chest. “He’s doing all this on purpose.” My chest heaves, the air is thin around me, and my lungs can’t inhale the amount it needs to keep my body from shaking.

  “Still have that mild temper, Col?” Gavin taunts, pushing away all rationality out the window.

  “He didn’t leave with Sawyer,” Ben assures me. “She stayed here.”

  “I don’t give a fuck,” I snap. “Get away from me.”

  “She barely left the house,” he continues. “There was no them.”

  “Step away,” I warn him in a growl. “Or you’re going to get hurt.”

  “Colson.” The severity in his tone snaps my glower at Gavin to land on him. “She wouldn’t even speak to Taylor. She was holed up in her house after you left. I even went over there, I was surprised she let me in. She kept asking me where you went...and if I would’ve known, I would’ve told her. You did what you had to do, for you, but Gavin didn’t reap the benefits.”

  “The benefits?” I echo. “He took her away from me.”

  “She didn’t—”

  “While you ass clowns are having a heart to heart, I’m going to go inside to see Boyd. See you in class, Coach.” He doesn’t bother to hear anything else I have to say, just strides toward the school.

  He’s going to go see Sawyer.

  They’re going to talk, fuck knows about what, but it makes my stomach twist and wrench to the point where I think I’m going to be sick. I don’t know if she’ll be in the room with Mrs. Benalu, but since she’s Jace’s tutor, she more than likely will be.

  With me in the room.

  I don’t think I can handle both of them together again. I know Gavin, he has absolutely no shame. He’ll try some bullshit because he knows it’ll get to me.

  And it will.

  There are no defenses for it, the reminders or reliving of what happened. How I found out she wanted Gavin again over me. That she never mentioned she was having doubts or that she wanted to give them another chance.

  I feel like I should’ve sensed it somehow, but I was so enamored with Sawyer that I was drunk all the time from just being with her.

  “I’m going to get this shit over with,” I impart, dropping the bat because I don’t need parents freaking out that a madman just busted through the school swinging a bat in his hands.

  “Don’t feed into this,” Ben contends. “He’s back to fuck around with you again, and he knows the perfect way to do it.”

  “I don’t want him near her.”

  “She more than likely doesn’t want to be near him either.” I pat his shoulder and round him, crossing the grass to the school.

  When I enter, I make my way to Mrs. Benalu’s room, anxious to see Sawyer but despising the way I have to.

  Will she be happy to see him?

  Was Ben right when he said she felt another sort of way about him?

  Honestly, it’s too late to ask.

  I stride through the halls quickly, rounding the corner to my destination. I want to see her face when she sees him again. Her eyes speak volumes, they always have. I could sometimes guess how she was feeling before she could even speak it.

  Another corner and I’m down the hallway I need to be at, but I halt mid step to Sawyer’s body frozen in the middle of it.

  Her back is toward me, her shoulders trembling while she stares at the closed door of her classroom. I study her, her legs dawn checkered black and white pants, she’s wearing black heels and a white shirt. Her red hair is thrown up into a ponytail, trailing down her back.

  “What are you doin
g, Bases?” She jumps, whirling around to face me. Her eyes are wide, saucer-like, her fingers picking at her lower lip in nervousness.

  Is she nervous to see him again?

  I’m about to mention that the motherfucker is seeing someone when she cuts into my petty statement.

  “Colson,” she gnarls. “I was just...um...just preparing myself for the next conference.”

  I continue to walk toward her. “Why are you shaking?”

  “I’m not,” she retorts, removing her hand from her mouth. She crosses her arms across her chest, her right hand cupping her shoulder in defense.

  “You are, why?” I stop until I’m a foot away from her. The hallway is completely empty, thank God, because I think we’re about to fight again. I’m so wound up that I don’t think I’ll be able to hold back a fucking thing.

  “I don’t know...how to tell you this.” I want to brush a loose strand of hair away from her face but I refrain, waiting to see what she’s going to say next.

  “Tell me what?” I press.

  Her body lets out an involuntary shudder. “Gavin is in there.”

  “Is he?” My voice is monotone, immune to her declaration while my insides are a fucking mess.

  I survey her body language, the way her words play off her lips.

  She’s upset. Possibly nervous or panicky, with her it could be both.

  “Gavin Sheston,” she frets. “He’s in there with...Jace. I don’t know why he’s here, Jace’s dad died when he was six...or seven, I don’t remember. But he—”

  “Bases,” I soothe, not stopping myself from touching her forearm. “Relax.”

  She shakes her head rapidly. “I don’t want to go in there.” A held breath from my body releases. Her words make it so I can decompress a little.

  “Why?” I’m a dickhead, but I need to know.

  I want to know everything about them to the last detail. I never cared to learn about it before, but with the way she’s having a mini-meltdown, my curiosity outweighs everything.

  “Because,” she replies. “I don’t want you in there.”

  And just like that, the spark of violence is back.

  “Me?” I fume. “Why, so you guys can just pick the hell up where you left off?”

  So, here’s where I fucked up.

  I opened my mouth, for one. Two, I let my anger seep out and snap back at her. And three, I forgot how close I was to her to where she could rectify my shitty comeback.

  Her response isn’t words but a sharp slap to my face.

  Present day

  Colson’s eyes widen and so do mine when my hand flies across his face. It was reactive, not thought out, but I don’t feel bad about it.

  A deep frown polishes his roughcast face. He doesn’t look like he’s slept in days, at least a week’s full of growth appears on his face, but that doesn’t matter because Colson’s bullshit is going to end. Even if I have to pull every last strand of hair out of my head to do it, I will. That’s what wigs are for.

  “This shit,” I seethe, “is getting old. Why the hell do you think I’m standing out here?”

  Colson’s hand swipes down his cheek, but he keeps his regard locked on me. Besides being tired, he looks exasperated and slightly irritated.

  “You just said you didn’t want me in there,” he quips. “How the hell was I supposed to take it?” I shake my head, he’ll never get it.

  Colson will never listen to me, believing what he needs to, which doesn’t make him “over” me or even halfway to forgiving me. All of this is repetitive, old crap I’m tired of hearing, seeing, and dealing with.

  “Take it however you want or need to, Hayes.” I spin on my heel to enter Mrs. Benalu’s classroom, to get Jace’s conference over with, because the sooner I can get through this, the better, but Colson’s callous hand grips my forearm.

  He places me back in front of him but doesn’t remove his hand. Instead, he looms over me, broad shoulders and all sorts of pissed off.

  “Enlighten me then,” he demands. “Why don’t you want to go in there?”

  “Figure it out.” I jerk my arm back, but his fingertips stay plastered to my skin. “Colson.”

  “Let’s start using our damn words.” My slitted eyes bore exasperation into his chest, but he resides unaffected, cool and collected, the model of the British guard.

  “Why would I want to be in the same room with Gavin?” I counter.

  “He’s your ex-boyfriend.”

  “Exactly, Einstein. Let’s just get this shit over with, let me go.” He does what I ask but follows close behind me as I open the door to meet my blast from the past.

  Nothing in this world would prepare me for what I was about to walk into.

  This was worse than Colson showing up in my parents’ foyer on Skylar’s arm. Heavier than any burden or struggle I’ve ever had to endure.

  This was Gavin Sheston; the boy who took my virginity and ruined everything Colson and I ever had. All with his words that acted like nails to my coffin.

  Seated at a large round table is a woman with auburn hair, green eyes, freckles on the bridge of her nose, and a smile that beams across it at Gavin. A woman that looks as though she could be my sister.

  My feet suspend on my way to the table.

  What in the actual fuck?

  The similarities between us are eerie, so much so that I thought I was walking to a Dr. Phil episode where cameras were going to appear out of nowhere and say that my parents gave her up for adoption.

  Colson’s hand finds the base of my back, and he gives me a small push, getting me to move. His touch remains the rest of the way there, Jace is sitting next to my almost twin, and Gavin is leaned back in his chair, smirking at me.

  My heart hurls into my ribcage.

  I can’t do this, I don’t want to do this.

  I don’t even want to be in the same galaxy as him, let alone classroom when we are only feet away from each other. I force my eyes to break from Gavin, looking for Mrs. Benalu but she’s not here.

  “Hi,” the woman greets, beaming a smile at me and extending her hand. “I’m Jace’s mom, Natalie.” Another gentle thrust from Colson and I reach for her hand, giving it a short shake.

  “Nice to meet you, Miss Tram. I’m Miss Boyd.”

  “Mrs. Benalu said she had to run out to take a call,” Natalie informs, keeping her lips curved in a smile. “She said we can start without her, and she’ll catch up when she gets back.”

  “Great,” I force myself to say. I move aside to introduce her to Colson. “This is Coach Hayes.” Natalie shakes his hand as well, keeping her the-world-is-so-awesome like attitude.

  “This is my fiancé, Gavin Sheston,” Natalie voices. A stuttered exhale rocks my chest, letting me release some of my held breath, until he uses his greatest weapon.

  His mouth.

  “No need to introduce us, babe,” Gavin voices with a quirk of his lips. “I went to school with both of them.”

  “Oh, that’s great,” Natalie beams. “It’s like a little reunion.”

  Colson pulls one of the blue plastic chairs out for me. “Yeah, one of those that you don’t want to go to.” Natalie chuckles, wrinkling her upturned nose, one difference we have.

  “So, what’s this business about my boy being suspended from the next game?” Gavin begins, locking his full asshole face onto Colson. “I’m almost positive he’s your best player.”

  Colson takes the adjoining spot next to mine, right next to me, to the point where our knees are brushing and we’re breathing each other’s air.

  “How many games have you been to?” Colson shoots back, his tone casual and not like he just countered back with another petty comment.

  “Been busy,” Gavin retorts then slaps a hand onto Jace’s shoulder. “Working with a career job and all.”

  Colson leans forward, his elbows landing on the table. “Yeah? What career would that be?”

  “So, Jace is improving,” I cut in, trying to dissolve their f
eud before Colson jumps over the table. “He’s doing amazing in history, got an ‘A’ on his paper. But we need to talk to Mrs. Benalu about any recommendations or how—”

  “How has he been doing with his test, Miss Boyd?” Natalie asks me with concern. “He works really hard at night, all he wants to do is make his coach proud and be able to get a full ride to college.”

  “He’s doing fantastic,” I allude, looking over at Jace with a weak grin. “Jace is a really good student, hard working. He brings me a bag of pretzels every time we meet.”

  “That’s my boy,” Gavin chimes in. Just the sound of his abysmal voice makes me nauseous.

  “Jace,” Colson says. “You do make me proud. You’re one of the best guys I have.”

  “Takes after his old man,” Gavin states. I grasp Colson’s knee under the table to keep words I know he wants to release from leaving his mouth.

  We’re in a professional setting, Jace’s mom is taking her son’s education seriously, and I don’t want Mrs. Benalu to walk in with Colson’s hands wrapped around Gavin’s throat.

  Too much paperwork and explaining would have to go into that.

  “Thank you, Coach Hayes,” Natalie says. “I’m so sorry I haven’t been to any of the games yet this year. I’ve been working double shifts.”

  “It’s not a problem,” Colson returns.

  “Don’t worry, babe, I’ll show up for moral support.” Gavin’s gaze engages on me. “I have a lot of catching up to do with Miss Boyd.”

  Even though my stomach drops, I squeeze Colson’s knee again.

  I’m okay. I’ll be fine.

  Gavin can’t get to me anymore. There isn’t anything left that he can destroy of Colson and I. We burned and crashed a decade ago.

  “I might be able to come to the next game,” Natalie beams. “I’m trying to switch my shift.”

  “That’d be great,” I allude, gripping my own knee to keep from telling her ‘keep Gavin at home’ and ‘get him the fuck out of here.’

  “So, Sawyer,” Gavin presses. “What’s been going on with you? I don’t see that you’re married.” His eyes glance down at my left hand, and I remove it off the table.