Secrets and Lies (Cassie Scot)

by Amsden, Christine

  “Are you okay?” I asked. “You’re not taking another day off of work, are you?”

  She shook her head. “I switched to lunch and dinner, since morning is the worst. Although evening isn’t always that great, either.” She sighed. “I sometimes get a few good hours in the middle of the day.”

  “Did you tell your mom?”

  Kaitlin nodded. “She asked if I wanted to move back in with her. When I said no, she started rattling on about the cost of formula and diapers.”

  “There’s always cloth diapers and breastfeeding.”

  “Ha! Don’t tell that to my mom. She saw your mom nursing a two-year-old in public once and went on for a week about weirdos nursing their high school kids.”

  For a second, I was caught between amusement and anger. But then I thought of my mother lying comatose in a hospital and reached for my typical sarcasm defense. “I assure you, we were all weaned by the eighth grade.”

  Kaitlin’s face fell at the look on my face. “How’s your mom doing?”

  “Not well.” I sat down at the table across from her and nodded at the can of peaches. “Are you going to open those, or just stare at them?”

  “Oh, um.” She set the can down. “I was just trying to... decide if I wanted breakfast or not.” I was pretty sure that wasn’t what she had been going to say, but I left it alone.

  * * *

  I spent the morning at the sheriff’s department filling out paperwork, so I could officially return to work tomorrow. At lunchtime I found myself at Kaitlin’s Diner, heading for my usual booth and the comfort of a cheeseburger.

  Madison smiled when I sat across from her. “How’s your mom?”

  I shrugged.

  Madison’s mouth fell slightly open. “Haven’t you been to see her?”

  I shifted uncomfortably, thinking of my conversation with Nicolas that morning. “I know I should, but how can I? Last month, they kicked me out of their lives because I didn’t measure up to their expectations.”

  Madison gave me a wry smile. “Yeah, I sort of know what that’s like.”

  “So, what would you do?”

  “I would visit my sick mother in the hospital, and help get my brothers and sisters through this.”

  Sometimes, there’s nothing more annoying than a friend willing to tell you the absolute truth. Closing my eyes, I nodded. “Yeah. I’ll go after lunch.”

  “Now,” Madison said. “Before you find some other reason to talk yourself out of it.”

  When I opened my eyes, I saw Madison digging in her purse. She took out a couple of ones and left them on the table.

  “What are you doing?” I asked.

  “I’ll come with you.”

  Kaitlin swung by then, wearing a small frown. “What can I get you?”

  “Nothing today,” Madison said. “Cassie suddenly remembered an urgent appointment.”

  “You going to see your mom?” Kaitlin asked, softly.

  I nodded.

  “Good luck.” With that, she walked back to the kitchen.

  “You don’t have to come with me,” I said to Madison. I knew she was uncomfortable around my family, and it didn’t feel right to make her face them.

  “I know I don’t have to,” Madison said.

  “Nicolas might be there.”

  Madison paused at that, her face looking a little pale. “Do you know why he’s... what he–?”

  “Do I know why he’s interested in you?” I asked.

  Madison nodded.

  “Because you’re an interesting woman,” I said.

  * * *

  Fifteen minutes later, we strolled through the hospital corridors to the ICU waiting room. I hadn’t even had to ask directions, since as soon as I’d approached the front desk, the receptionist had identified me and pointed me in the direction of my family.

  The waiting room was a blue and white rectangle with a large row of windows overlooking the busy street below. A dozen chairs, four tables, and countless magazines decorated the room. Christina and Adam were on the floor when I arrived, playing with cars and trucks. Elena sat in a chair by the window, staring out at the sky. Isaac and Juliana were reading. I didn’t see Nicolas, but Edward sat by the door, pretending to read a magazine while he kept one eye on the children.

  For a minute, all I could do was linger in the doorway. Then Madison pushed me inside.

  They all seemed to see me at once – all except Elena, who didn’t seem to see anything at all. Christina’s eyes went big and she hid behind Adam, who did not, as he was prone to do, run up to me and wrap himself around my leg. Isaac scowled at me. Juliana glared.

  Edward was the only one who smiled. “It’s nice to see you, Cassandra.”

  Now that I was there, I had no idea what to say. The evil looks my brothers and sisters were giving me were enough to make me wilt.

  “Nicolas is in with Mom right now,” Edward said. “They don’t want more than one of us in with her at a time. When he comes out, would you like to–?”

  Stiffly, I nodded. Then I cleared my throat. “How is she?”

  “She’s still here,” Edward said, as if that said it all. And in truth, it did.

  I took a seat in one of the chairs near the door. Madison sat down next to me, her expression uneasy.

  “You haven’t introduced your friend,” Edward said, obviously trying to keep the conversation pleasant.

  “This is Madison.” Then I went through everyone else in the room, for her benefit. “There’s Christina, Adam, Elena, Isaac, Juliana, and my-um, and Edward Scot.”

  “Nice to meet you,” Edward said.

  Madison nodded shyly. Luckily, we were saved from more small talk by the return of Nicolas, who looked exhausted. He slumped into a chair next to Edward without immediately noticing us.

  “Who’s next?” Nicolas asked.

  “Cassandra,” Edward told him.

  Nicolas sat up straight, relief written all over his face at the sound of my name. Madison gave me a tiny nudge, and I made my way out of the waiting room and down the desolate corridor to my mother.

  The last time I’d seen Mom, she had been trying to explain to me how the fact that she had to disown me didn’t mean that she didn’t love me. Despite the guilt and nerves marring her face that day, she’d looked as beautiful as ever. Powerful anti-aging potions kept her looking twenty-something, and people who didn’t know our family assumed she was my sister. We looked very similar. Our hair and eyes were the same color, we had the same tiny noses, rosebud mouths, and a small dusting of freckles across our noses.

  Tied to a bed, and garbed in a spotted white hospital gown, with myriad tubes and machines connecting her to life, Mom looked like a shell of her former self. The parts were all still there, but she looked at least ten years older and a hundred years frailer. Her eyes were closed, and she didn’t move as I parted the curtain around her bed.

  What was wrong with her? No one seemed to know, and I was sure my father had consulted every magical healer in five states. Now it was modern medicine’s turn, but they didn’t seem to be doing any better.

  There was a single chair by her bed. I sat down, not sure whether I should talk to her or touch her. Not sure what I’d say if I did.

  A nurse came by to change an IV bag, smiling in encouragement as she worked. “Talk to her. They say people in comas can hear.”

  “Um, yeah,” I said uncertainly.

  “I think she’s been waiting for you to come,” the nurse added as she walked out again a minute later.

  Did everyone know about our estrangement? Well, I suppose I could come up with something to say.

  “Hi, Sheila,” I said. She wasn’t Mom, and that wasn’t my decision. It was hers. “I, um, I’m sorry you’re sick. Everyone’s worried about you and um...” I trailed off, trying to fight back a surge of tears. It wasn’t fair. I wanted to tell her the truth about how I felt. I wanted her to understand what she’d done to me. I wanted to tell her what was happening in my life,
and I wanted her to help me through it. I even wanted to tell her about Evan. She’d never been as hateful toward him as Dad had been. Maybe she could help me figure that out.

  In short, I wanted my Mom back. I was twenty-one years old and I still wanted my mother.

  “I’m so mad at you,” I told her. I took her hand, willing her to listen. “You hurt me more than you’ll ever know.”

  For a second, nothing happened. Then, quite suddenly, her eyes seemed to flicker. They didn’t exactly open; it was just the tiniest hint of movement beneath the lids. Then her mouth moved, and I could have sworn I heard my name.

  With a tiny yelp of surprise, I dropped her hand. I lurched backward, knocking over my chair and ended up on the floor on my backside.

  An instant later a nurse was there, frantically checking the monitors and the leads attached to my mom’s chest. “What happened?”

  “She said my name,” I said.

  “She woke up?”

  “I-I don’t know.” She seemed asleep at the moment.

  “Can you do it again?”

  I righted my chair, sat back down, and seized my mother’s hand, but nothing happened. She remained perfectly still.

  “Were you talking to her?” the nurse asked.

  “Yeah,” I said. My face went a little pink. “I told her I was mad at her.”

  This time, however; nothing happened.

  “I think I’d better go back to my family,” I said. Without another word, I fled from my mother’s side.

  I practically ran back to the waiting room, but I drew up short just before I entered. From inside the room, I heard the unmistakable sound of Madison singing. For a moment I just stood there, shocked into frozen immobility. Then, I burst out laughing. I couldn’t help it. She was making me feel the cheerful undercurrent of the song.

  As I stepped into the room I saw seven people, including my father, clapping in time with, “Bingo.” Once in the room, I had no choice but to clap along with them. “B-I-N-G-O, B-I-N-G-O, B-I-N-G-O and Bingo was his name-o!”

  Not long after, the song ended and everyone burst into applause. Madison’s face was rosy and flushed, as it had been after her concert in the park, and Nicolas beamed at her.

  “I told you she was good,” he said.

  “Do another!” Christina said.

  “I-I don’t know.” Madison’s eyes scanned the room and finally fell on me.

  “You have quite a gift,” Edward said.

  Madison did not understand the implications, but she did accept the compliment. “Thanks. I’m going to student teach music at the elementary school this fall. I might have Adam and Elena in my classes.”

  “Yay!” Adam said.

  Elena smiled. It was the first time I’d noticed her, but she wasn’t looking out the window any longer. She was focused on Madison, more present in the real world than she’d been in a long time. Juliana looked like she might cry with joy.

  Somehow, the entire scene made me feel sick inside. I wasn’t sure why until Madison stood, as if to leave. Adam raced forward to wrap his bony arms and legs around her.

  “Please stay,” he said. Whatever had been wrong with his charisma before, it was on full force now. Madison was powerless against it.

  “All right,” Madison said.

  That’s when it hit me. In the space of fifteen minutes, and after singing one song to demonstrate her power, they’d accepted her. Adam had flung himself and his charm on her, not on me. Elena had drifted back into reality for her, not for me. Everyone was smiling at her. And clearly, no one wanted her to leave.

  I was the one who felt like a stranger in their midst. I was the one who didn’t fit in.

  Nicolas slid an arm around Madison, a move that didn’t make her bolt the way it should have. She might have given him a worried look, but that was about it.

  “Any requests?” Nicolas asked.

  Madison looked at me. I shook my head, and fled from the room to find an empty corner of the hospital where I could be alone for a few minutes.

  20

  I FOUND BRADEN WAITING JUST OUTSIDE my apartment when I returned. He looked anxiously from his watch to the door as if he’d been there a while, and was trying to decide if he should leave. Yes, I found myself thinking. But even if he could read minds, I doubt he would listen. He was a man on a mission.

  “Cassie,” he said the moment he saw me. “You never called me back last week.”

  I smacked my forehead. “I’m so sorry. I completely forgot.”

  “You forgot?” He gave me an odd look. “You’re not normally so forgetful.”

  “Nothing’s normal right now. My mom is in the hospital.”

  “I heard. The town is buzzing about it. Half the town is convinced the Blackwoods did it.”

  “Of course they are. What else would they think?” I took my key out of my purse and motioned for Braden to step aside so I could unlock the door.

  He didn’t move. “I don’t know. What else are we supposed to think with Evan going around telling people he owns you?”

  “Can we talk about this inside?”

  “I’d rather not. I’m not convinced we’d have any privacy in there.”

  “You know you’re beginning to sound like a conspiracy theorist, right?”

  “Just because you’re paranoid...” Braden began.

  “Yeah, yeah.”

  “Look, Cassie, this guy is dangerous. You’re the only one who doesn’t seem to know it.”

  “I know him.” I also knew there was nothing in the world Braden could do to save me from him, or any other sorcerer.

  “You never would admit that he cast love spells on people.”

  I shook my head, at a loss for how to respond. He was right. I had not believed the rumors until I had experienced Evan’s kiss for myself.

  The problem here wasn’t whether or not Evan was a danger to me, but whether or not Braden could do anything about it. And to that, I could firmly answer no.

  “Things were great between us until he stepped into the picture,” Braden said.

  “Were they? I’m not so sure. We only saw each other at school breaks, and you dated lots of other women while you were at school.”

  “A few. I wouldn’t say lots. And you could have done the same.”

  “I know. It wasn’t an accusation, it was just...”

  “Just what?” Braden asked.

  “It was in your head.” I winced as soon as I had said the words, but I knew they were true. “You told me you loved me for the first time and in the same breath you asked me to marry you.”

  He scowled, his face turning red. “That’s how I always planned to do it – telling a woman I loved her for the first time when I asked her to marry me. I thought it would be romantic.”

  “Oh.” Looking at it from a certain point of view, it could be romantic. With the right girl. If she felt the same way. But I wasn’t in love with Braden, and never had been. For me, the relationship had been fun, carefree, distracting, and even vindicating. No one had dated me in high school. As far as I could tell, no one had looked twice, and I had begun to feel like something of a freak until Braden came along. I still felt that way, even with a powerful sorcerer like Evan wanting me. Well, apparently they all did, and for the same reason – one that put me at a serious disadvantage.

  “Oh?” Braden said. “That’s all you have to say? Notice the coincidence that Evan came back into your life just before I asked.”

  “Is this about me, or about your wounded pride?”

  He turned his face away, though his body continued to block the doorway. “Do you love him?”

  “Evan?” I asked, my heart missing a beat.

  “Unless there’s someone else I should know about.”

  “No, I don’t.” I couldn’t. But a seer’s words came floating unbidden through my mind, as I had known they would: Beware your heart and soul....

  “Will you come to Chicago with me?”

  I hesitated, wishing it
were a simple question. On the one hand, a new town meant a fresh start. On the other hand, Evan would never let me leave. “No.”

  “Because he said you couldn’t?”

  “No.” Not explicitly. Not yet.

  “But you don’t think he’d let you?”

  “No.”

  Braden stepped away from the door, coming so close he nearly towered over me, though he wasn’t quite as tall as Evan. He had blue eyes, though. They weren’t the same as Evan’s, but they were similar.

  “I can’t help you if you won’t meet me halfway,” Braden said.

  “You couldn’t help me anyway.”

  He cupped my chin with his hand and lifted it slightly. I knew he was going to kiss me, and though most of me rebelled at the idea, another part thought: What could it hurt? One last good-bye kiss, and then he’d know it was over. It had never been my intention to hurt him, after all. So I stood there, neither helping nor hindering, as his lips found mine.

  It felt all wrong. I knew it in the split second it took me to pull away, even before I saw his eyes bulging, nearly popping free of his head.

  “What’s going on?” I asked.

  He didn’t answer. Probably, he couldn’t, because over the course of the next few seconds his skin turned green, his body shrank, and finally, with a loud POP, he disappeared into a pile of clothing.

  “Braden?”

  The only answer was a pitiful CROAK!

  “Braden!”

  A small green frog hopped out of his clothing and started down the hall for the staircase.

  “Stop, Braden!”

  The tiny frog wavered for a second, but continued for the stairs. I ran after him, not sure what I would be able to do for him, but certain he wouldn’t survive on his own. A predator of some sort would get him by nightfall.

  I grabbed him as he was about to jump down the stairs, though in my effort not to hurt him, I didn’t grip him hard enough, and he fell through my fingers. On the second grab, I caught him, and held him firmly while I opened my apartment door and found a shoebox that could hold him for a few minutes.