Pemberley Celebrations - the First Year

by Kara Louise

  The three stood watching as it pulled away.

  “I want to thank you both,” Georgiana suddenly said. “I know you were aware of my feelings for Richard. I behaved quite foolishly, and I just want you to know that I am grateful you did not speak of it to me.”

  Elizabeth put her arm about the young girl’s shoulder. “You knew we suspected it?”

  “Oh, yes,” Georgiana said. “My brother and cousin are very good at acting as though nothing is wrong. They have had good practice over the years.” She looked at Elizabeth and took her arm. “But you, Elizabeth, could not so easily hide your concern.”

  “I wanted so much to come to you, and hug you, and talk to you about it!”

  Georgiana shook her head. “And I am so grateful you are here to talk to me. It means a great deal to me. But no, this time it was so much easier for me that you thought I did not know, particularly around Richard. I would not wish him to feel awkward in my presence for anything.”

  “He cares for you deeply, Georgie,” Darcy said. “You know that.”

  Georgiana sighed deeply, a single tear running down her cheek. “Yes, I know that, Brother.” She bit her trembling lower lip. “And I shall always hold him in the highest regard myself.”

  She suddenly straightened and drew her shoulders back. “Come, let us go inside. I should like to practice on the pianoforte.”

  All Hallows’ Eve

  The ballroom was aglow with candles illuminating the costumed dancers out on the dance floor. The guests were dressed in their finest attire, taking on the guises of their favourite fictional or historical characters. Some wore masks to add to the atmosphere of this masquerade ball. Hiding behind a mask as someone else was an entertaining diversion for some, an escape for others.

  I stood off to the side, standing as stiffly as my costume would allow. Being dressed up as a pirate, however, did give me the ability to stand aloof. For are not all pirates unfriendly and do they not instil fear in others? While I did not necessarily wish for people to fear me, I hoped to play my part so convincingly that it might keep strangers at a distance.

  I had come to this masquerade ball at the insistence of my good friend, Charles Bingley, who had recently moved to this small and unpretentious country neighbourhood. Now I was beginning to wonder at the wisdom of it. I had known only a handful of people when I arrived, and now, after more than an hour, I could not say I knew any more, nor did I have the desire to meet anyone. Everyone seemed to consider the costume and masks as a way to hide their true identities and become someone they were not. This made me extremely uncomfortable, as disguise of any sort is an abhorrence to me. I refused to wear a mask, but instead wore a single patch over one eye. I would not have worn a costume at all were it not for my friend’s insistence. I would not have considered coming at all had he not been such a good friend.

  Now, as I stood in the midst of strangers, I had begun to regret deeply the fact that I let him talk me into this. I had a sense that everyone in the room knew who I was, what I was worth, and the particulars of my homes in Derbyshire and London. How that information seemed to travel with me wherever I went, I shall never know.

  On the other hand, it seemed to me that everyone else’s true identity was camouflaged from me behind a mask and costume. The women’s gazes, which were bordering on the flirtatious, were downright strangling me.

  Bingley pulled me aside and encouraged me to dance a few dances, and take the opportunity at this costumed affair to show a livelier side that he claimed to have seen displayed often enough elsewhere. I did not find it at all within my power to do such a thing in this lowly neighbourhood, and instead of feeling more at ease with others who were becoming more and more liberated from their true selves as the evening wore on, I was becoming more and more withdrawn, and wanted nothing but to leave.

  I gave Bingley the excuse that my costume did not allow me the flexibility to dance. The large black hat emblazoned with skull and crossbones did not fit well and would easily fall off. I was laden down with a heavy sea cloak over a loosely fitting white shirt. He suggested I remove the cloak while inside, but I would not feel comfortable in such informal attire. A kerchief was tied around my neck, and big, heavy boots weighted down my feet. Besides, there was not a tolerable woman to be found.

  The ball was being held at the Meryton Assembly Hall on the edge of a small village. There seemed to be a person here from every walk of life, and I found it excessively disconcerting that I knew none but those in my small party. I needed desperately to seek a respite from it all.

  I looked for Bingley, who was completely engaged in dancing with every lady he possibly could. I envied my friend for his ease in meeting new people and conversing with them. For me it was a struggle that was continually perpetuated by the games ladies played to make my acquaintance and their incessant attempts to flatter me. It appeared now that one particular lady had caught Bingley’s eye.

  Knowing that Bingley’s attention now seemed to be concentrated on this young lady, he would not be aware if I disappeared for an hour or two. I walked out of the ballroom and down a long hall, away from the loud and discomfiting festivities. I found myself at the doors of a large empty room with windows on the opposite side, and a door that seemed to lead outdoors.

  At first I walked over to the windows and peered out. It was dark outside; a full moon’s light was dimmed and distorted by wisps of fog that settled and rose again. A few lit torches allowed me to see what appeared to be a courtyard. There was something about it that beckoned me. Perhaps it was the fact that there was no one out there – at least no one that I could see. I would only step out for a few minutes.

  I walked over to the door and turned to look behind me. Grateful to see no one, I opened the door and walked out.

  The air had cooled, so I was thankful for my cloak, which would provide sufficient warmth. I could easily hear the orchestra playing and immediately congratulated myself on making a wise choice in stepping out here. A bench was situated along one wall hidden in the shadows. I walked over to it and sat down. I leaned my head back against the wall and breathed in my first real relaxing breath that whole evening. I let it out slowly as I realized I would finally be able to enjoy myself.

  My reverie, however, was interrupted by the sight of a young lady coming from a door across the courtyard. As she drew nearer, I determined upon close scrutiny that she appeared to be well-bred, but of a moderate class. She was not dressed for the costumed ball, so I wondered who she was.

  As she walked across the courtyard, I realized that she did not see me. I watched as she walked toward the large columns that led out to the front, but then altered her direction as she heard the music begin to play after a short recess. She walked over and peered through one of the windows that looked into the ballroom. I saw her press her hands over her heart as if she saw something that touched her. But then I determined that she merely wished she could be in there enjoying the ball.

  She took a few steps away from the window, and I watched in amusement as she turned and suddenly curtseyed. A smile came to my face as she then began dancing the movements of the music. My amusement quickly turned to interest as I watched the moonlight cast its light upon her features; her dark hair glistened and her eyes brightened with a smile that lit her face. Despite the certainty of her being raised in the country and likely not having the upbringing of an upper class lady, she seemed graceful yet lively, confident yet charming. I found my interest in the young lady growing strong.

  Her back was to me as the orchestra played its final notes. I silently stood up and walked toward her. As the music stopped, she curtseyed again, and I heard her whisper a soft, “Thank you so much for the pleasure of this dance.” She held her curtsey and tilted her head down, closing her eyes. I quietly moved into place across from her, and when she looked up, she was quite startled to see me standing there.

  She backed away quickly. “I am so sorry, sir. I did not see you. I should never have presumed to d
ance in this manner if I had known anyone was out here. Excuse me.”

  She turned to leave, and I quickly reached out for her hand.

  “I did not mean to frighten you. Please forgive me.”

  I supposed that she knew if someone were to discover us out here alone, it might harm her reputation, but something stronger than propriety held her in place.

  The music began playing again, and I quickly asked, “May I have the honour of dancing the next with you? Or were you perhaps hoping to dance again with your previous partner?”

  The lady smiled and nervously laughed. “Sir, I do not believe it would be proper.”

  “If you do not tell anyone, then I shall not, either.”

  Still holding her hand, I turned, causing her to turn with me to the steps of the dance.

  “My name is Fitzwilliam Darcy. And may I inquire with whom I am having the pleasure of dancing?”

  “My name is Elizabeth Bennet.”

  “Miss Bennet, it is a pleasure to meet you.”

  “Are you recently arrived from sea?”

  “Excuse me?”

  She nodded at my attire. “Pirates usually roam the seas, do they not? I was not aware that they roamed parties.”

  I smiled. “Ah, that may explain it then. Perhaps that is why I felt so uncomfortable in there.”

  She gave me a sideways glance. “You did not come out here to search for some hidden treasure, then? Perhaps there is a chest of gold and jewels buried beneath this very courtyard! Certainly there must be a treasure of some sort!”

  I smiled and thought to myself, that while I had not intended to, I had indeed found a treasure.

  As we continued to move to the steps of the dance, there was a sense of perfect unity in our movements. I enjoyed watching her face. Each time the wisps of fog separated enough to let the moon shine through, it lit her face, and I found myself captivated by her eyes. The contrast between dancing in the dark, foggy mist, and then suddenly in the glow of moonlight radiating upon her, created an effect that made her appear almost angelic. My heart quickened unexpectedly.

  We danced the remainder of the dance in silence; perhaps because I was captivated by her and the fact that she rendered me speechless, or perhaps because Miss Bennet knew our dancing out here would be frowned upon if we were discovered. She occasionally looked at me as if she was trying to sketch my character. I am certain that she wondered just what kind of man I was.

  When the music finished, our hands remained clasped. When I did not release them, she finally said, “It is getting late, sir. I must be going.”

  I tightened my hold. “Must you? The night is still young, there are many dances left to dance.”

  “Yes, I think I must.”

  “May I walk you home?”

  Elizabeth paused as she contemplated what her answer to me should be. I believe she felt fairly certain she could trust me. A smile tugged at her lips as she finally answered, “Yes, you may. And if we meet any wayward scoundrels on the way, shall you draw out your sword and protect me?”

  I looked down, as if looking for my sword. “Unfortunately, I fear I must have misplaced it somewhere. But do not fear, my lady, even though unarmed, I shall still protect you if I am called upon to do so.”

  “But perhaps I should be wary of you?”

  “I should hope not. But just to reassure you, I am visiting my friend, Charles Bingley, who has recently let Netherfield. He is in there, if you wish to have him vouch for my character.”

  Elizabeth smiled. “I do not think there is a need for that. I can see that you are a trustworthy gentleman.”

  As we walked out of the courtyard, Miss Bennet drew her arms tightly around her. She shivered slightly, and I immediately offered my heavy sea cloak to her. “Do you mind if I put this over your shoulders? You must be cold.”

  “Yes, I am; thank you.” Once I removed my cloak, I felt my shirt suddenly billowing like a ship's sail in the light breeze. She must have noticed it as well, as she gave me a curious look and smiled warmly. I slipped the cloak around her shoulders and hoped she would not find my informal attire offensive to her sensibilities. Thankfully, she did not seem to mind.

  I then removed the annoying patch so both my eyes could behold her beauty. As we walked down the long drive of the lodge, Miss Bennet asked me about myself.

  At first I knew not what to say. I could certainly oblige her with my net worth or describe in lavish detail my London town home and my estate in Derbyshire, but instinctively I knew she was only interested in who I really was.

  I talked of my family, my loving mother and good father, both deceased. I lit up as I talked of my younger sister, so sweet and shy, more than ten years my junior. I shared with her how I loved to read and discuss the books I have read, but rarely found anyone with whom to do the same. I enjoyed walking and spending time with close friends, but confessed I had a difficult time in the company of people I did not know well. Such as at the ball tonight. I told her how I wished to be more personable like my good friend Bingley, and not as reserved.

  “There is nothing wrong with being reserved,” Elizabeth said. “I would imagine, however, that some people might misinterpret that as snobbery if you do not take the time to put yourself out to be friendly.”

  She was not accusatory in her tone, but I suddenly realized that it was probably how people viewed me! I rubbed my chin as I contemplated her words. I looked down at her and wanted to learn more about her.

  “Now, would you tell me about yourself?” I asked her.

  Elizabeth sighed, and I hoped she would not think her life too uninteresting, too beneath mine to be of interest.

  “Well, today is my birthday.”

  “Truly? And how were you spending your birthday this evening?”

  “I stopped by the hall hoping to see someone very dear to me whom I had not seen in a long while.” She said this softly, almost as a sigh.

  I felt comfortable enough to gently take her hand and bring it around my arm. “And did you see them?”

  “Yes, I did.”

  “I am glad. Did you have a pleasant visit?”

  “Unfortunately, I was only able to see them… very briefly.”

  “Well, I am certain you will see them again.” I took her fingers in mine and squeezed them while whispering, “Happy birthday, Miss Bennet. Now, what else can you tell me about yourself?”

  Miss Bennet turned her head away and looked down. I felt her shiver again as the evening suddenly seemed to grow colder.

  “I, too, have read much. As a young child I was so eager to learn to read. I believe my father’s love for reading greatly influenced me. He is a good man, my father.” She paused again to take a deep breath. “I have four sisters and a mother who is very interested in seeing all her daughters marry well.” She laughed nervously. “But then, what mother is not?”

  I smiled as we began walking up to what I assumed was her home. It was a great deal smaller than Pemberley, but appeared well kept and maintained.

  “This is it,” she said softly.

  I stopped and turned toward her. She looked up, and I could only imagine the expression upon her face as the fog was now so thick we could barely see each other.

  “May I see you again?” I asked.

  Miss Bennet slowly shook her head. “I think not. We live in two completely different worlds, Mr. Darcy. You live in yours…” she nodded and looked toward the hall from which we had just come. “And I live in mine.”

  “And what if I do not care?”

  “I am sorry, Mr. Darcy. It is impossible. Thank you for escorting me home.”

  My hand grasped one of hers. “Please, Miss Bennet. You are like a shining star that brightened this otherwise dark evening. You are as enchanting as an angel! Please do not say you will not see me again.”

  Elizabeth stepped back and shook her head. “No, Mr. Darcy; it cannot be.”

  As she turned to leave, I brought her hand up to my lips. When I placed a kiss gently
upon it, I noticed tears glistening in her eyes.

  She pulled her hand away and brought it to her heart, covering it with her other hand. “I really must go!”

  She gave me one last look, an expression on her face I did not understand, and ran up the steps to the house, quickly disappearing inside. I stood outside for a while, unable to move my feet from where they were planted. I kept my eyes on the door, inwardly hoping that she would come back out.

  When she did not, I slowly turned to walk away. I had taken but a few steps away from the house when I remembered the cloak that I had draped around her shoulders. I stopped and turned.

  Taking brisk, long strides, I quickly made my way to the front door. I hoped my knocking would bring her back and not awaken anyone else.

  I lightly knocked, feeling that the sound of my beating heart was louder than my tap on the door. I stepped back and waited. When no one came, I knocked harder.

  When I heard steps approaching the door, I straightened up and eagerly waited. It seemed an eternity before it finally opened. Unfortunately it was not Miss Bennet, but an older man. He was not dressed as a servant, but looked to be a gentleman.

  “Excuse me, sir. Are you Mr. Bennet?”

  “I am indeed, young man. And may I wager a guess that you are a pirate?”

  I looked down at myself and mumbled, “The masquerade ball, sir.” The two of us stood staring at one another.

  I finally spoke. “I am sorry, sir, I did not mean to disturb you…”

  “Then what did you intend to do by knocking on my door at this hour?”

  “If you do not mind, sir, I escorted your daughter home from the Meryton Assembly Hall just now and she has my cloak. I thought perhaps I might retrieve it.”