The Ghost

by Danielle Steel

  I suggest you give it all to his sister-in-law and his four nieces. They're his most direct heirs now. But she wanted nothing to do with it, not a penny, not a plume, not even a souvenir of Edward. And she said exactly that to the attorney.

  I see, he said, looking dismayed. He had been hoping for a little business if she decided to contest it. According to his counterpart in England, the Earl had had an enormous fortune. But Sarah didn't want it. And the lawyer from Boston left as soon as she said so, and thanked him.

  They watched him ride away and Sarah stood there, thinking about Edward for a few minutes, but she felt nothing. It had been too long, too hard, and too awful. And she was far too happy now to have any regrets over Edward. It was finally over.

  But as far as Fran+oois was concerned, it was just beginning. He had thought of it the moment he'd heard the lawyer. And he turned to Sarah as soon as they were alone again and asked her.

  Will you marry me, Sarah Ferguson? There was not even an instant's hesitation. Just a tinkle of laughter, as she nodded.

  They were married on April first, in the little log church in Shelburne in a simple ceremony, and no one was present except the two boys who worked for them, and Alexandre, who was seven months old. Their baby was due in only three months.

  And the next time they went to the Deerfield garrison, Fran+oois bowed formally to the colonel and presented Sarah to him. And he looked startled for a moment.

  May I present the Countess de Pellerin to you, Colonel ' I believe you've never met her, he said, beaming.

  Does this mean what I think it does? he asked kindly. He had always liked diem both, and felt bad for their situation, although his wife thought it quite shocking. She had stopped writing to Sarah as soon as she'd heard about the first baby. And others had had the same reaction. But now suddenly everyone wanted to know them, and they were invited by some of the nicest people in Deerfield. They stayed at the garrison for a while and Sarah visited Rebecca. She had four children by then, and was expecting her fifth one, which was also due that summer.

  But Fran+oois was anxious to get home this time, he wanted to see how their new house was coming. And once they got back to Shelburne, he worked feverishly on it with the men he hired, and the Indians whom he taught to do the kind of work he had once seen in Paris. Everyone said it was going to be beautiful, and Sarah beamed when she went there. She loved watching them build it, and it was a passion with her too now. She was already planning her garden. They expected to have the outside of the house done by August, and be able to move into it in October, before the first snows came. And they could work on all the interior details all winter. Sarah was so excited she could hardly wait, and she worked there daily all through June, in spite of the encumbrance of the baby, but this time, even she was less worried. She was taking all the herbs she knew she was supposed to, and getting a lot of rest, and walking as the Indian women had told her to. Everything felt right, and she had little Alexandre to prove to her that miracles could happen.

  But by July first, there was no sign of a new arrival, and Sarah was restless. She couldn't wait for the baby to come, so that she could see it and move around more freely. She felt as though she had been pregnant forever, and she said as much to Francois.

  Don't be so impatient, he chided her, great works take time. And this time, he was more nervous than she was. It had been difficult the time before, as far as he was concerned, and he had been lucky to save the baby. He dreaded another terrifying experience like that one, although he was as excited as she was. But he just hoped it would go smoothly. He had even considered sending for the doctor in Shelburne, but Sarah insisted she wouldn't need him. And she seemed very lively in the first week of July, which convinced them both that the baby wasn't ready. Last time, she had slowed down visibly as her time came closer, and could sense herself that the baby was coming. But this time, as tired as she was of lugging a big belly around, she felt as though she could go on forever. She wasn't even tired. And he had to discourage her from riding over to the new house constantly, to attend to some detail.

  I don't want you riding over there alone anymore, he scolded her one afternoon as he saw her returning. That's dangerous, you could have the baby by the side of the road, but she laughed at him. The last time she had plenty of warning, it had taken twelve hours, and the others far longer.

  I wouldn't do that, she said primly, every inch the countess.

  See that you don't! He wagged a finger at her, and she went to make dinner. But they were both thrilled with the little gem of a house they were building. And everyone in the neighborhood was talking about it. They thought it was very fancy for Shelburne, to say the least, but no one seemed to mind it. If anything they liked it. They thought it added importance to the area, and was a real feather in the cap of Shelburne.

  Sarah made dinner for him that night, and Fran+oois went to pore over some more plans in their sitting room, while she cleaned the kitchen, and after she'd washed their dishes, it was still daylight, and she tried to convince him to go walking with her.

  We haven't been to the waterfall all week, she said, obviously in good spirits as she kissed him.

  I'm tired, he said honestly and then smiled at her, I'm having a baby.

  No, you're not, she parried with him, I am. And I want to take a walk. You heard what the Iroquois women said, it will give the baby strong legs. She was laughing at him and he groaned.

  And me weak ones. I'm an old man. He had just turned forty-one, but he didn't look it. And she was twenty-seven. But he followed her outside to humor her, and they had only walked for five minutes when she slowed noticeably, and stopped walking. He thought she had a rock in her shoe perhaps, and stood beside her as she clutched his arm, and then he realized what had happened. She was having the baby. But he was grateful they hadn't gone far from the house, and could turn back easily, but as he was about to suggest it to his wife, she fell to the ground beside him. She had never felt such pain in her life, and she could hardly catch her breath as he knelt beside her. Sarah, what happened? He wondered if it was a bad sign, as she lay on the grass by the roadside. Are you all right? He was terrified, and he wasn't even close enough to the house to call for the boys to get the doctor. He felt trapped there.

  Frangois ' I can't move ' she said with a look of terror as the pains ripped through her. But this was not the beginning, it was the middle and the ending, it was the worst pain she could remember, and then she suddenly knew the familiar feeling as he held her. Francis ' it's the baby ' it's coming ' She looked panicked as she clutched him.

  No, it's not, my love. Would that it were that easy, he found himself thinking, but she knew better. She was suddenly gasping in agony and he could see that she was almost screaming. Remember last time, how long it took, he said, trying to convince her. He wanted to pick her up and carry her back to the house, but she wouldn't let him move her.

  Don't! She screamed out in pain, and then writhed in agony beside him, as he knelt helplessly beside her.

  Sarah, he said, feeling helpless, you can't just lie there. You cannot have the baby so quickly. When did this start? he asked, suddenly suspicious.

  I don't know. She started to cry. I had a backache all day today when I went to the house, and my stomach hurt for a while, but I thought it was from carrying Alexandre. He was a healthy size now at ten months and still loved to be carried.

  Oh my God, Francois said with a look of panic. It's probably been all day. How could you not know that? She looked like a child suddenly and he felt sorry for her, but he wanted to get her back to the house now, no matter how much she said it hurt if he moved her. He would not leave her here, lying in the grass to have their baby. He tried to scoop her up again, and she screamed and fought against him, and then suddenly her entire face was clenched and she was pushing. He had never seen anything like it. She was delivering her baby and there was nothing he could do to stop her or help her, and then suddenly he realized how badly she needed him and h
e held her shoulders and tried to assist her. She was totally intent on her work, and making little sounds as she fought the pain, and then suddenly she began to scream as though a terrible force were tearing through her, but he remembered that sound, and he let her down gently on the grass, and lifted her skirts, and ripped off her pantaloons, and as he did, she screamed again, and he could see the baby coming into his hands, with its bright little face screaming at him in outrage. And within an instant, he was holding the baby. It was a little girl, and she was perfect and breathing, and screaming blue murder at her father.

  Sarah, he said, looking at his wife, lying on the grass in the twilight with a peaceful smile on her face, you are going to kill me. Don't ever do that to me again! I'm too old for this! But neither of them were. He leaned over and kissed her and she told him how much she loved him.

  That was much easier than last time, she said simply, and he sat down next to her and laughed as he put the baby on her chest. He had used his hunting knife again, and tied the cord neatly.

  How could you not know she was coming? He was still overwhelmed by the experience, and it amazed him to see how peaceful she was after so much pain. She and the baby looked completely content, and he could still feel his knees shake.

  I was busy, I guess. I had so much to do at the new house, she said, smiling at him, as she opened her blouse and the baby found her breast easily and nursed there.

  I shall never trust you again. If we ever have another child, I will chain you to your bed for the last weeks, so I won't end up delivering a baby by the side of the road somewhere. But he kissed her again as he said it, and let her rest for a while as they lay beneath the stars that had just come out, but it was getting chilly. Now, may I carry you home, Madame la Comtesse? Or would you like to sleep here? He didn't want the baby catching a chill there, and neither did Sarah.

  You may carry me home, Monsieur le Comte, she said grandly, and he bundled her up carefully, and carried her the five minutes back to the house as she held the baby. It was not terribly comfortable for her, and she wanted to try to walk, but he wouldn't let her.

  This is the kind of thing the Indians talk about, he said in an undertone as they reached their farmhouse, but I never believed really happened. But with that, the two boys had just seen them, and asked what had happened to Sarah. They thought she'd fallen or sprained her ankle, and hadn't realized she was carrying the baby. It was sleeping, exhausted by its hasty arrival. We found the baby in the field, Fran+oois explained with amusement. It's amazing, she looks just like her, he was laughing and the boys looked stunned.

  Did she just have her like that, on the way to the waterfall? one of them asked incredulously.

  Right on the way, he assured them. Never missed a step, she's very good at this, he said with a wink at his wife as they admired the baby.

  Wait til I tell my mother, the younger of the two said, she always takes forever, and by the time the baby comes, my dad's so drunk he falls asleep, and then she gets mad at him because he can't see the baby.

  Lucky devil, Fran+oois said as he carried his wife and daughter inside. The boys had been baby-sitting for Alexandre but he had fallen asleep before he could see his sister.

  What'll we call her? Sarah asked as Francois lay beside her on their bed. She was looking more tired than she admitted.

  I've always wanted a daughter called Eug+!nie, but it's not as pretty in English, he confessed.

  What about Fran+ooise? Sarah asked, grateful to be on her bed again, she was feeling a little woozy. With the speed of the delivery, there had been a fair amount of bleeding.

  It's not very original, he said, but he was touched, and finally agreed on it. They named her Francoise Eugenie Sarah de Pellerin. And she was christened in the little church in Shelburne along with her brother in August.

  Their house was nearly ready by then, and Sarah had her hands full with her children, but she went there as often as she could to observe their progress. And by October, they were in it.

  The entry in her journal that day sounded jubilant, as she talked about every detail of the house. It made Charlie smile to read it. The house had scarcely changed since she and Francois had built it, from the sound of it, and as he set the journal down, he felt wistful thinking about their children. How lucky Sarah and Francois had been. What a full life they had had. He wished he had been as wise and as fortunate as they were.

  He was feeling slightly sorry for himself, as the phone rang, and he almost didn't answer it. But he wondered if it was Francesca, reporting on her first reading of the journal. And with a small smile, he picked the receiver up, and spoke into it.

  Okay, Francesca, how is it? But it was Carole, and Charlie was shocked when he heard her.

  Who's Francesca? she wanted to know.

  A friend. Why? What's up? He was completely confused to hear her. What could she possibly want from him? She had already called to tell him that she and Simon were getting married. Their divorce wasn't final till late May. So she wasn't waiting any longer than she had to. Why are you calling? he asked, still embarrassed at having called her Francesca. It made him feel very foolish, and even more so when he wondered if it would make Carole jealous. That was just plain stupid.

  There's something I want to tell you, she said sounding awkward, and he had a major case of d+!j+ vu.

  Didn't we already have this conversation? We just went through this. He didn't sound overly pleased to hear from her, and she noticed it. But she still, had this obsession about being decent to him, which Simon told her was cra2y. He said she didn't owe Charlie anything anymore, but Carole knew better. You already told me you're getting married, he reminded her. Remember?

  I know. But now there's something else I think I should tell you.

  He couldn't imagine what it was, and he wasn't even sure he wanted to hear it. He didn't really want the intimate details of her life with Simon. Are you sick?

  Not exactly, she said, and he was suddenly worried. What if something terrible had happened to her? He was sure Simon wouldn't take care of her the way he would. I'm pregnant, she continued, and knocked the wind right out of him. He was stunned into silence. And I'm sick as a dog. But that's beside the point. And I thought you should know, Charlie. I didn't know how you'd feel about it. And it's going to show before the wedding. He wasn't sure if he hated her or loved her for telling him, a little bit of both, but he was really shocked, and it really hurt him.

  Why Simon? he said, sounding unhappy. Why not me during all those years? You never wanted kids, and suddenly zap, you get yourself a sixty-one-year-old boyfriend, and you're pregnant. Maybe I'm sterile, he said, and she laughed gently.

  Hardly, she said. She'd had one abortion before they were married. I don't know, Charlie. I just turned forty, and I'm scared the opportunity will never come again. I don't know what to tell you, except this time I know I want it. Maybe if it had happened to us, I would have felt that way too. It just never did, that's all. But it was more than that and she knew it. In the last few years, Charlie hadn't been right for her. She wasn't happy with him. He was a relic from her youth, and Simon wasn't. He was the man she wanted to marry, and have children with. He was everything Charlie wasn't. I didn't call you to hurt you, Charlie. I just thought you should know. Even if it was awkward to tell him.

  Thanks, he said, trying to absorb what she had said to him, and thinking about the future. Maybe if it had happened to us, we'd still be married. It was impossible not to think that.

  Maybe, she said honestly, or maybe not. Maybe this all happened for a reason. I just don't know.

  Are you happy about it? he asked, suddenly thinking about Sarah, and her babies with Francois. Maybe there was a Sarah out there, waiting for him. It was a nice fairy tale, but he didn't really believe it.

  Teiah, I guess I am happy, Carole said, honest with him again. I wish I didn't feel so sick. It's really rotten. But the idea of a baby is kind of exciting. Something about the way she said it moved him deeply.
He could tell it was important to her, and for an instant, she sounded like a different person.

  Take care of yourself, he said, worried about her. What does Simon think about all this? He must feel a little elderly to be folding diapers again, or does it make him feel youthful? It was a mean thing to say, but Charlie couldn't resist. He was jealous of the guy. He had walked off with his wife, and now they were having a baby. It was a little hard to stomach.