Close Relations

by Lynsey Stevens

  ‘I had someone else?’ Georgia asked bitterly, and her brother nodded. ‘I don’t suppose it occurred to you it might have been Jarrod who had someone else?’

  Lockie met her hard gaze and slowly shook his head. ‘No, Georgia. Jarrod worshipped you.’

  Anger and pain rose inside Georgia until it almost choked her. Worshipped her? That was the joke of the century. If Lockie only knew. She sighed and just as suddenly her anger died. With a negating movement of her head she turned away from her brother, feeling ridiculously close to the tears she hadn’t allowed to fall for years.

  ‘Oh, Lockie. You couldn’t be any further from the truth,’ she said softly.

  ‘I don’t think I am, Georgia. Jarrod was in love with you and I thought you loved him.’

  ‘You were half-right. I did. But he didn’t!’

  ‘Come on, Georgia. I was there too. I saw it all. I knew you went off to meet Jarrod, or at least I thought it was to meet him. But it wasn’t, was it? There was another guy, wasn’t there?’ Lockie stepped closer to her. ‘How could you do that to Jarrod, Georgia, when he loved you so much?’

  She spun around to face him. ‘There wasn’t anyone else, Lockie; that’s the truth. Not that it’s any of your damn business, then or now.’

  Lockie frowned. ‘I can’t believe you’d lie, Georgia. It’s not like you. But I heard what you told Dad that night. I heard you say it wasn’t Jarrod.’

  Lockie had overheard! Georgia felt panic rise. She couldn’t talk about that night. She wouldn’t. It was far too agonising to remember, more than she would be able to bear.

  ‘I don’t want to discuss it, Lockie. I won’t talk about it,’ she finished, feeling hysteria rising and fighting it down.

  ‘Georgia—’

  ‘No, Lockie. Please.’ Georgia held up her hand to halt their conversation. ‘I’ve had enough. Now, just back off.’

  She hurried past him and into her room, turning the key in the lock. A few minutes later she heard Lockie’s door slam, and she sank tiredly onto her bed.

  Georgia walked through the stock room of the bookshop, her nerveless fingers moving unconsciously on the strap of her shoulder bag.

  ‘See you on Monday, Georgia.’ Her workmate, Jodie, smiled a farewell. ‘I’d say you’ll be pleased to be going home; you’ve been a little distracted all day. Are you sure there isn’t anything wrong?’

  ‘No, Jodie, not exactly.’ Georgia sighed. ‘At least, nothing I can blame on anyone but myself.’

  Jodie raised her eyebrows. ‘Don’t tell me.’ She grinned. ‘You allowed one of your family to talk you into something or other.’

  ‘How did you guess?’ Georgia gave a rueful laugh and Jodie’s grin broadened.

  ‘ESP. Or maybe you’ve just been wearing your “worried about my family” look all day.’

  ‘It’s not exactly the family. Well, indirectly. I’m afraid I’ve been a little more selfish than that. Today I’ve been wholeheartedly worried about myself.’ Georgia glanced at her watch and swallowed the wave of nervous agitation that rose in her throat.

  ‘Sounds ominous.’ Jodie leant against her desk and folded her arms. ‘You are going to tell me about it, aren’t you? I mean, I can’t stand the suspense.’

  ‘Mandy’s away and I’ve let Lockie talk me into taking her place and singing with his band tonight. I’m a mass of nerves just thinking about it. I don’t know how I allowed him to do it but-well, I’m stuck with it now. Unless I develop a sudden virulent strain of laryngitis.’ She pulled a face. ‘But Lockie would never believe me.’

  ‘Where will you be singing?’ ‘At the Country Music Club.’

  Jodie straightened in surprise. ‘In Ipswich?’

  Georgia nodded and Jodie gave a low whistle.

  ‘Wow! That’s really something, Georgia. If I’d known I wouldn’t have promised my parents I’d go over for dinner. I wonder if I can cry off? I’d love to hear you sing.’

  ‘Oh, Jodie,’ Georgia appealed. ‘Don’t make me feel more nervous than I am. I have this dreadful fear that I’ll open my mouth and nothing will burst forth. Besides, you know you can’t disappoint your parents.’

  ‘I suppose not. But you’ll be great, Georgia, and if I can I might be able to make it after dinner. What time do you go on?’

  Georgia’s brows drew together. ‘I’m not sure of the exact time we start. They have a couple of guest artists as well. But we’ll be on most of the night by the sound of it.’ She glanced nervously at her wrist-watch again. ‘I’d better go. Lockie’s picking me up. But there’s no need to go rushing up to Ipswich after work, Jodie, because the band’s contracted for at least a month so there will be plenty of time to catch the show.’

  And by then Lockie would have contacted Mandy and she would have flown back to Australia, she added to herself as she headed for the door.

  ‘Georgia?’ Jodie’s voice had her pausing and turning back to face the other girl. ‘Break a leg, OK?’

  Georgia gave a wavering smile and continued out through the door.

  Once outside the bookshop, she scanned the parking lot for Lockie’s battered kombivan. As it wasn’t there waiting she walked around to the front of the building to catch Lockie as he drove along the main street.

  Five interminable minutes later there was still no sign of the van. Where was Lockie? Surely the kombi wouldn’t choose today to break down again, would it? If Lockie was much longer she’d have to ring a taxi.

  Nervously she paced the street, glancing again at her watch. She’d have to have some time, a little breathing-space, to sit down and calm herself before she had to take the stage. Otherwise she was going to let Lockie down by making a mammoth fool of herself.

  The three practice sessions they’d had had gone really well considering, she tried to reassure herself, but her nervousness refused to heed her attempt at rationality.

  Georgia groaned softly. Damn Lockie! Ever since they’d been children he’d managed to wheedle her into his wretched schemes. And always to her detriment. They’d always been caught out and now, with a surge of annoyed self-pity, Georgia acknowledged that she had been the one on the receiving end of the chastisement most of the time. Although Lockie was older it seemed to be acceptable that he was a daredevil. She was the sensible one so she should have had more sense.

  Now she’d allowed Lockie to talk her into this-this nightmare. She could feel her knees tremble just at the thought of the evening ahead. And if Lockie didn’t put in an appearance soon Georgia had the sneaking suspicion she’d either steal spinelessly into the night or faint dead away right here on the pavement.

  A white station wagon drew to a halt in front of her and the driver’s door opened. The emblem on the side of the car instantly removed what little composure she had left, and her eyes flew panic-stricken to the man who climbed from behind the wheel.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  ‘GEORGIA, come on. Get in,’ his deep voice bade her as he stood half-in and half-out of the car.

  Georgia was transfixed, standing stock-still, her thoughts swinging momentarily in limbo. She swallowed and unconsciously drew an uneven breath. What was he doing here?

  ‘I’m illegally parked, Georgia. Do you want me to get a ticket?’

  Like an activated puppet Georgia stepped mechanically towards the car and Jarrod subsided into the driver’s seat to thrust open the passenger door from the inside.

  ‘I’m waiting for Lockie.’ Georgia’s hand clutched the doorframe, and she made no move to climb in beside him. ‘He’ll be here any minute.’

  ‘No, he won’t. Lockie’s van has a flat tyre so I offered to pick you up and drive you to the club,’ he said shortly. ‘Now, get in, Georgia.’

  A car swung around the parked station wagon, tooting impatiently.

  ‘Georgia, I’m going to create a traffic jam.’

  Reluctantly she slid into the car, and with controlled movements Jarrod drove away.

  ‘I thought it would be quicker for me to take you
up to the club as Lockie’s in the middle of setting up the sound and I don’t suppose he’d want to take the time to change his tyre now.’

  ‘Lockie never has time for the more mundane things like tyre-changing,’ Georgia muttered, making a mental note to have stern words with her brother. They were falling into the habit of depending on Jarrod to come to their rescue when any plans came unstuck. Lockie had to realise that the less she saw of Jarrod, the better she’d like it. Hadn’t she told him so?

  ‘Lockie has the charm to get away with sidestepping those more mundane things.’ There was a slight smiling tone in Jarrod’s deep voice and the sound set Georgia’s ragged nerveends shuddering with a wave of sudden, sharply bitter-sweet memory.

  Angrily she pushed them aside. ‘I’m sorry Lockie had to disturb you,’ she began stiffly.

  ‘I was coming up to the club anyway. And actually I’m glad he did ask me to give you a lift, as I want the opportunity to talk to you.’

  Talk? Hadn’t they said enough four years ago? Georgia wanted to throw the words out at him. ‘And what exactly did you want to talk about?’ she asked him succinctly.

  ‘About you.’

  ‘Me?’ Georgia was too stunned to stop her voice squeaking. ‘In what context?’ she questioned as she got her breathing under control again.

  ‘Lockie’s band,’ he said casually as he accelerated to join the traffic on the highway.

  Georgia turned to gaze unseeingly at the passing scenery. Didn’t he realise she was het up and nervous about tonight’s performance? Surely Jarrod of all people would know how anxious she always was before she went on stage? He would remember…Why should he remember? she asked herself cruelly. If he had he wouldn’t be trying to start an in-depth conversation with her now.

  ‘What are you trying to say, Jarrod?’ she asked flatly.

  ‘I’m trying to say you’d be better off sticking with your job at the bookshop than trying to make a living at something as unpredictable as show business. It’s all right for Lockie,’ he continued. ‘That’s his bag. But it won’t do for you, Georgia. I don’t think you could cut that type of life.’

  ‘Oh.’ The anger began to build, pushing Georgia’s nervous agitation to the back of her mind.

  ‘And the singing, Georgia. Do you really enjoy it? I still say you weren’t so keen in the old days.’

  Don’t, Jarrod! Don’t talk about then. Not now, please, something inside her begged him. She just wanted to end this conversation. It might lead down a path she couldn’t bear to travel with him.

  ‘Would I be doing it if I didn’t enjoy it?’ she asked, not trying to hide the irritation in her voice.

  ‘What about this demo tape Lockie wants to make? How do you feel about that?’ Jarrod persisted, obviously not sensing her displeasure.

  ‘That’s all in Lockie’s mind, just wishful thinking on his part at the moment. He can’t afford it anyway.’

  ‘He gave me to believe it’s a distinct possibility. So are you interested?’

  Georgia shrugged as he sent a sideways glance at her.

  ‘Then why get involved in the band if you’re not interested in this recording thing of Lockie’s?’ he asked flatly.

  Quite honestly at that moment Georgia couldn’t have cared less about Lockie’s recording hopes. She just knew she was going to have a blazing row with her irresponsible brother in the very near future.

  And as for her involvement in Lockie’s plans-well, the sooner Mandy got back the better. Georgia was well aware she had her job at the bookshop and it was definitely more her style. But before she could admit this to Jarrod he was continuing his unwanted observations.

  ‘The recording business isn’t something you can do part-time. Lockie has plans for the band to do a national tour, and quite frankly I can’t see flitting about the countryside suiting you, Georgia. Living out of suitcases. Hitting three towns every week. You said you were studying. What happens to that and your career then? Are you going to throw it away on the chance that the record will sell?’

  Georgia’s urge to demand why Jarrod thought any of this was his business warred with the sudden suspicion that perhaps her brother might have misled her again. Lockie hadn’t mentioned Mandy’s return since he’d convinced her to take the other girl’s place. Had her brother really tried to contact Mandy? Or was he just going to expect her to stay on with the band after the weekend?

  ‘I’m sure Lockie didn’t say I was going to give up my job—’ she began.

  ‘The way Lockie’s been talking, your job doesn’t enter into the scheme of things.’ He shifted exasperatedly in his seat. ‘Be realistic, Georgia. How many home-grown records make the grade here in Australia? What security for your future is there in that?’

  How dared he talk to her about security or her future when he’d brutally snatched that same security, that same future coolly, cruelly out from under her?

  ‘Aren’t you overreacting?’ Georgia bit out between her clenched teeth. ‘Lockie’s a dreamer, you should know that. Even he would have to admit it. And this fellow Delaney he’s been talking about-he may not even show up at the club. I can’t see a man as busy as he must be hot-footing it into the sticks to check out a group of unknowns. I mean, this is the first decent engagement that Lockie’s pulled off for Country Blues.’

  Jarrod rubbed his hand along the line of his jaw, the sound rasping in the confines of the car. ‘I just don’t want to see you getting dragged along on Lockie’s enthusiasm. Before you know it you could end up on a merry-go-round that won’t and then can’t stop.’

  Why are you so worried about me now, Jarrod? Her inner self screamed at him and then challenged her. Ask him why? Why the interest at this late date? Was he so perturbed four years ago when he must have known he was breaking her heart? Ask him that.

  ‘Why this sudden concern for my welfare?’ The words tumbled from her lips.

  ‘Sudden?’ He raised an eyebrow as he pulled the car to a stop at a red light. ‘Haven’t I always been concerned? We’ve always been sort of family, after all, Georgia.’

  ‘Family? Have we?’ Her eyes met his and held them. ‘And yes, I’d say sudden concern. You didn’t find it necessary to be worried about me when-’ her voice wavered slightly before she regained control of it ‘-when you were overseas.’

  ‘Isabel kept me informed,’ he said evenly, and Georgia gave a short laugh.

  ‘Aunt Isabel did? We see Aunt Isabel once in three months or so under her sufferance. Even when I visited your father she was rarely there. She spends most of her time on the Gold Coast. What could she tell you about any of us? She’s never shown any interest in Lockie, Morgan or me since we were born.’

  Her interest was in you, Jarrod, she wanted to scream at him. Don’t you remember?

  She had always felt that relations between Jarrod and his stepmother had been uneasy, and as he’d grown older they had seemed to deteriorate. Or so she’d thought. In her naivety she’d totally misinterpreted the situation until the night it had all fallen so agonisingly into place.

  An undercurrent of volatile tension seemed to fill the car. Discussing her aunt, of all people, with Jarrod had the capacity to unlock a torrent of painful memories and she desperately forced them back before they took shape and cut her to the depths of her soul.

  ‘I was in touch with Peter too,’ Jarrod said flatly.

  A brooding silence sat heavily upon them.

  ‘Peter always told me how he enjoyed your visits,’ Jarrod continued on a different note. ‘He looked forward to you coming over to see him,’ he added softly, and then that same shuttered look shrouded his face again.

  ‘I enjoyed talking to him too,’ Georgia conceded, wondering just how accurately Uncle Peter had reported their conversations over the past four years. There was hardly anything her uncle could have said anyway, for while Jarrod had been away they had talked about everything except her uncle’s absent son.

  ‘But we’re getting away from the point.’ Jar
rod’s words cut across Georgia’s thoughts. ‘And I can’t drive and talk about this at the same time,’ he said exasperatedly, and pulled off the road onto the verge, switching off the ignition and turning to face her.

  Georgia glanced at her wrist-watch. ‘Jarrod, I don’t think we have time for this-’ she began, and he moved one hand negatingly.

  ‘A few minutes won’t stop the show. All I intended to do was ensure you were aware of the pitfalls of the recording industry, and I’m speaking from firsthand experience.’

  In her mind’s eye Georgia had a fleeting glimpse of Jarrod all rigged out as a punk rocker, and a long-dormant spark of her old sense of humour struggled to the surface, taking her by surprise as her lips curved upwards at the corners and a soft, almost rusty chuckle escaped.

  Jarrod’s eyes appeared to be locked on her mouth and the muscles in his throat contracted as though he was having some difficulty drawing breath. The air between them crackled and Georgia’s smile died.

  Then Jarrod moved slightly, his hands adjusting the sash of his seat belt. His actions drew Georgia’s attention to their nearness, to his taut, muscular thighs, the pale denim of his jeans not disguising the contours of his hard body, and it was her turn to fight for a steadying breath.

  ‘What was so funny?’ he was asking, seemingly unaware of the effect he had on her, had always had on her. And she must have imagined the tension that had momentarily seemed to hold him just as rigid as it had held her.

  Georgia drew herself together. ‘You said you had firsthand experience in the recording business. Why weren’t we told you could sing?’ Georgia raised her eyebrows enquiringly. ‘Did you dye your hair purple and wear eye make-up?’

  Jarrod blinked and then pulled a face. ‘Not my own experience. A girl I knew in the States.’

  A white-hot pain stabbed through Georgia as all her humour died, sliding back into the empty void of the last four years. So there had been girls. She’d have to be pretty naive to imagine there hadn’t been. Jarrod was a virile male, she knew that-knew just how potent he was from some firsthand experiences of her own. Yes, of course there would have been women.