The Finest Line

by Catherine Taylor

  Her first words since the attack were able to be spoken. “Why should I?”

  Lewis seemed very amused as he spoke his next words very slowly, “Because a young man is dead because of you.” He was more delighted when he received a terrified gaze from her. “You should be more responsible Mairead. Unlike you, not everyone can walk a thin line of balcony hundreds of feet in the air without falling... but he certainly tried.”

  The realisation of what Lewis was implying struck Mairead harder than the assault. Even with the pain in her neck, she shook her head vigorously.

  He continued, savouring every word. “You impressed the world Mairead with your dance of death to save a little dog. Would they still love you if that same dance caused a man to die? Think about it and I’ll see you noon, Thursday.”

  He kissed the top of her head, got up and walked away leaving Mairead contemplating the apocalypse of her world. When she vomited the pain in her neck was horrendous but not nearly the agony she wished upon herself. Her tears were intermittent rivulets running down her face.

  It just didn’t seem possible. Surely it was something she would remember but why should she? Walking on heights had long been a habit. Had Josh returned to find her up on the railing and wanted to impress her? It was too awful to contemplate. Mairead cried bitterly. Josh was dead because of her.

  She had to get back to James. He would help her. Somehow he would make it all go away so that they could just go on being happy together. Yet the more she tried to convince herself the clearer the situation became.

  James was good and moral. He had been awed by her gift of virginity for him, the very gift she had put up for auction. He had comforted her when she had grieved for Josh, the wonderful young man whose life she had destroyed. Everything she had done was tainted. There wasn’t an ounce of decency in her.

  How long before she would drag James down with her? She had no doubt that he would support her but how would he ever be able to respect her? One look at her selling herself on video would make everything they shared seem like a lie.

  It was incredibly sad to think that he was only metres away, waiting for her, probably getting annoyed that she was late, beautiful sweet James that had given her so much happiness in so very little time.

  She couldn’t go back and face him. To lose any of the love he had for her would be far too painful. James deserved better.

  He would be terribly anxious about her when she didn’t return. She would eventually have to get word to him that she was okay.

  Her mission now was to collect her remaining belongings from Kylie’s place and get into some hotel where she would stay until Thursday. After that her future was indefinite and bleak.

  Getting up from the ground, Mairead brushed herself off and put her cap and sunglasses in place. She walked slowly along the alley until she reached the street. In the distance she could see the buckets. She turned and walked the other way until she found a taxi stand.

  The driver was patient as he weaved in and out of the streets of Aro Valley. Kylie lived there somewhere but Mairead had no idea of the address. Eventually she spied some familiar landmarks and then the timber framed building of three flats, two dividing the bottom level and Kylies’ above them, a long stairway leading to it.

  The door was locked and Kylie was still at work. After trying a couple of windows, Mairead sank down onto the front doorstep and waited. For the first time in an hour she allowed herself to cry again. Clutching her knees, she buried her face into her arms so that she was unaware when Miranda came up the stairs.

  “Oh my god, Mairead,” the shrill voice got her attention and Mairead tried desperately to wipe at her tears, but when the girl’s arms embraced her she dissolved once again. Miranda held her tightly until she could speak again.

  “You mustn’t tell them,” Mairead pleaded.

  “Tell them what?” Miranda looked terrified. “My god, Mairead what’s happened?”

  “It’s nothing really, but you have to promise me that you won’t tell Kylie how upset I was.”

  “Oh my god, it’s that bastard, he’s hurt you, hasn’t he?”

  Mairead shook her head clearly. “No, he hasn’t. It’s nothing to do with him. James has been incredible and wonderful, it’s just that...” The lie had to be set in motion. “I just realised that I didn’t really love him and I’m sad because I don’t want to hurt him.”

  Miranda nodded with understanding. “Oh Mairead, you poor thing; nothing worse than having to tell a guy it’s over. The guys take it so much worse than we do.”

  “I just want to go home.” Mairead accepted some tissues from Miranda and wiped at her face. “I don’t want to burden Kylie anymore either. She’s done enough for me. I don’t suppose you can recommend a good cheap hotel for a couple of days till I can change my flights?”

  “Hotel nothing,” Miranda told her firmly. “You come and stay with me. I’m right in the city in a really nice place with two really cool people. Heaps of room and we sleep right into the afternoon and work all night so you’ll have plenty of privacy.”

  The idea sold itself to Mairead on many levels. It would mean that she wouldn’t have to face anyone, not even Kylie who would see through her lies in seconds. She would be close to the hotel where Mark was staying and somewhere close to escape to if things got out of hand. She could be alone where she might be able to make a plan to salvage something of her life.

  The only problem was Miranda. Mairead grasped her hand. “Could we go there now so I don’t have to see Kylie and Miranda you wouldn’t be able to tell her, not until I’m gone.”

  Miranda looked thoughtful. “I’m supposed to be having coffee with her. She’s going to be home soon and...”

  “I’ll leave a note.” Mairead searched through her bag and found a pen and scrap of paper. “I’ll let her know that I am fine and have just gone home.”

  “I suppose I can text her and tell her something come up but we’d better do it like right now.”

  Mairead quickly wrote on the paper: ‘Kylie, it didn’t work out with James. I’m going home. I will ring you in a few days. I love you and I’m so sorry, Mairead.’

  She used her hair band to tie the note to the door handle and followed Miranda downstairs to her car, trying to assure herself that this was the best course of action.

  Only when she was sitting in Miranda’s old Volkswagen did she begin to see the flaws. She had no luggage and would have to buy underwear at least. Although she liked Miranda dearly, could she trust her and her flatmates to keep away from the media?

  “Who do you live with Miranda?”

  Miranda beamed, “Amiri and Diana, two of the coolest people on the planet. Diana can be a bit of a bitch but you’ll fall in love with Amiri. He is so beautiful. He has these fucking gorgeous dreads, body of a slut and more camp than a row of tents.”

  “Will they mind me coming to stay?”

  Miranda laughed, “Are you kidding, Mairead Kavanagh, staying under our roof? When I told them about what you did the other night they were completely blown away, especially Amiri.”

  That was not what Mairead wanted to hear but she let Miranda continue.

  “Amiri does pole dancing competition stuff. You should have seen him.” Miranda employed her interpretation of a stereotype gay voice. “Can you imagine... me and Mairead on a pole together in perfect synchronization? We would blow the bitches out the water.”

  It was a welcomed distraction. “He does competition? I didn’t know pole dancing was so involved.”

  Miranda groaned. “Just don’t get him started. He’ll be showing you all his videos and he’ll be dragging you down to the car park all day and you won’t get a minute’s peace.”

  Mairead frowned. “What’s in the car park?”

  “It’s the one under our building. Part of it has been fenced off to be used as storage. Amiri suffers a little from agoraphobia and doesn’t like to go to a gym so he flirted with the manager and she let him put up four dancing
poles there and that’s where he spends most of his time, when he’s not working or sleeping.”

  Every cloud had a silver lining and in the storm that raged within her, Mairead managed to find hers. Until the gods found a way to destroy her body along with her heart, she still would be able to dance.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  Mairead was thinking that Miranda’s description of Amiri had not done him justice when she entered the apartment. He was lovely in both physicality and personality. Wearing only cargo pants which hung low on his hips, Amiri jumped up from a lounge chair when they entered.

  “No fucking way!” He stood frozen in a stance with his feet apart as if to offer a view of his lean and muscled coffee coloured body. The only hair visible was the long dreads that hung about a very handsome face. Everything else was just smooth and contoured.

  Miranda was giggling and looking very proud. “Guess who’s coming to stay with us for a couple of nights.”

  “Who’s fucking coming to stay?” The voice belonged to a short, heavily tattooed and pierced girl who came marching out of a bedroom. Like Amiri, she froze when she saw Mairead.

  Miranda was relishing the impact on her flatmates. She took Mairead’s hand and drew her into the lounge. “Mairead Kavanagh, I’d like to introduce you to my dumbstruck flatmates Amiri Tairi and Diana Holden.”

  Mairead smiled and held out her hand. Diana took it tentatively and continued to hold it while she stared. Amiri smacked her arm away so that he could have his turn.

  “My life is now fulfilled. I’ve met the Goddess and I can die a happy man.” He too held onto her hand.

  Mairead blushed. “I’m so pleased to meet you both and hope it might be alright if I could stay two nights.”

  Amiri freed her hand and danced about. “You can stay forever. I’m stripping the bed, cleaning my room and doing whatever I can to make you a suitable temple.”

  Diana groaned. “Stop being a fucktard Amiri.” She looked at Mairead who was grinning. “What the big douche bag is trying to say is that we’re happy for you to stay as long as you want.”

  The more sober welcome touched Mairead deeply and tears cascaded from her eyes as she suddenly felt very vulnerable and tired. Immediately she was embraced from all directions and led to the couch where she struggled to get her crying under control.

  “Fucking man trouble,” Miranda explained to the others as she embraced Mairead. Her flatmates sighed and nodded in perfect understanding.

  Mairead felt ill. Her thoughts were heavy and dark and if she didn’t do something soon she feared that she would just start to scream and not be able to stop.

  “I am really sorry about this,” Mairead sniffed and accepted tissues from Amiri. She smiled weakly and looked into his large brown eyes. “This is going to sound really weird but... could I please use your poles?”

  Amiri’s face lit up as if she had just told him that he had just won a million dollars.

  The underground car park housed several cars under a low concrete roof, supported by concrete pillars. The parking area ended at a cyclone fence beyond which was a brick area with a higher roof, lit up by a single naked bulb. The space was empty, except for some broken furniture, paint tins and rubbish, and four chromed poles bolted into the roof and the floor.

  Mairead was dressed in a black aerobic shorts and bra top which Miranda had eagerly lent her. She gazed at the poles with Amiri who was still naked above the waist and holding a portable disc player. Miranda and Diana sat down on the floor in a corner and lit up cigarettes.

  “Would you please show me,” Mairead looked up at Amiri, who smiled and nodded.

  Setting the disc player on to the floor, he pushed some buttons until the pretty sounds of an Elvis Presley ballad filtered through the space. On bare feet he approached one pole, taking hold of it and squatting down and stretching his legs.

  Rising, he leant back against the chrome. His eyes closed and his face was the picture of content as his spine stretched up the length. Lifting his arms, he brought them back over his head and took hold. In a slow precise movement his legs were brought up and his arms lengthened until he was perpendicular to the pole and further on still until he was vertically upside down.

  From there came a set of stunning twists, spins and poses which defined his muscular physique and very masculine grace. In awe, Mairead studied every foot and hand movement employed and was aware of which muscle group gave power to his performance.

  The ballad was just entering its second refrain when Amiri, high on the pole, stretched out horizontally and held out his hand to her. Drawn to him, Mairead came forward and took hold and recreated his introduction perfectly. Amiri stayed up high while she did her own series of movements, before twisting down to join her in a spin.

  When Amiri began another slow upside down vertical, Mairead did the same until they were facing each other and together they slid down the pole. Anchored by their feet they let go with their hands which caught their gentle slide to the floor, where they finished their dance in a handstand and a slow backward cartwheel.

  Amiri screamed and picked up Mairead, holding her high at arm’s length by her hips before tossing her and catching her in his arms. Cradling her, he looked deep into her eyes. “If you don’t marry me this very moment, I will go crazy!”

  Mairead laughed and hugged his neck, planting a kiss on his cheek.

  “Fuck sake Amiri,” Diana’s voice boomed. “Put her down and try to remember that even if you weren’t fucking fag, she’s still way too classy for you.”

  Amiri put Mairead down gently and spun to Diana. “Well at least I have some class bitch.” Ignoring Diana’s upturned finger, he turned back to Mairead. “Totally amazing but there’s some serious flaws going on there Sweetie.”

  Mairead grinned. “I am new at this.”

  “I know and that in itself blows my mind. You got some serious talent going on there and with the right training... oh my god...”

  Mairead shrugged and gave him one of her innocent smiles. “I am here for two days.”

  Amiri gaped and then became very serious, placing his hand on his hip and walking a circle around her, studying her. “I must warn you Mairead, that this totally gorgeous and sexy exterior hides a driven and dedicated fanatic for his art. I can be brutal.”

  His last remark made her grin. “I’m actually really good at doing brutal.”

  “Maybe so,” Amiri gave her an amused smile. “But the pole can be a much meaner bitch than the bed.”

  Mairead blushed furiously, astonished that he had picked up on her private pun. “I meant that I’ve had some really mean trainers in gymnastics before.”

  “Yeah right,” Amiri grinned and turned to Miranda and Diana. “What do you think bitches?” He tried hard to stay casual. “Can I really be bothered?”

  His flatmates nodded excitedly and he could no longer hide his enthusiasm, and took a flying leap, swivelling powerfully around the pole before tossing his body upwards and backwards and landing perfectly on his feet.

  “Sweetie, you have yourself a new trainer.”

  The afternoon dissolved into early evening. Mairead was able to set her troubles aside enough to listen eagerly to Amiri’s instruction. She endured his impatient sighs whenever she did not perform to his standard. He was very hands on and even swatted her backside when she hesitated about retrying an ominous move.

  “Ouch!” Mairead rubbed her bum and glared at Amiri who showed no interest in her temper.

  “Then get up the fucking pole and try it again.” Amiri crossed his arms and waited.

  Mairead reluctantly obeyed, slightly amused that he could get far more co-operation from her than any of her gymnastics trainers ever had. In her content, she thought how James would probably approve of Amiri’s firm hand tactics. As quickly as his face filled her thoughts, she pushed them aside and used the emotion elicited to attack the pole.

  Only when Miranda and Diana brought pizza to them, did she allow herself to re
lax. Sitting on the floor, sweating and stuffing her mouth, Mairead enjoyed the company of her new friends.

  Their humour was infectious and she learnt that behind the snide remarks to one another was a deep and trusting friendship. Amiri was a barman at one of the nightclubs and Diana did piercing at a tattoo parlour.

  None of them questioned her about her situation and simply accepted her presence among them, to which she felt very humbled.

  By eight o’clock the trio were preparing for work and Mairead felt her gloom descend. Amiri told her that under no circumstances was she to train alone in the car park at that time of night and Mairead had to agree. She’d already encountered one nasty creep that day and was in no mood to meet any more.