by Blair Grey
Unbidden, I thought about Holly. My oasis, my friend beyond the MC business. I had walked out of the bar because I knew better than to get too close to her. I knew better than to put her in danger, and I knew that she would be in danger if she was around me. But at the same time, I needed that break from thinking about Ray and Braxton and the MC. I couldn’t ask Braxton to go for drinks with me, not with the way that things currently stood, and Cameron wasn’t the kind of guy who I’d normally go for drinks with either.
If I refused to call Holly, things were going to be pretty lonely, at least until Ray came clean about his cancer to his son. And even then, if Braxton realized that Cameron and I had known about his hospitalization before Ray told Braxton about it, he might refuse to go for drinks with me.
I knew I should steer clear of Holly, for her own sake as much as mine, but I was already reconsidering. I had promised that I would call her. Maybe I really should.
But for right now, I turned my attention back to Cameron. “I’ve been seeing some white vans around,” he said.
I frowned at him. “Another MC?” I asked, wondering what he was worried about.
Cameron laughed. “No,” he said, shaking his head. “If it was another MC, they’d probably be on bikes. White vans are police.”
I grimaced. “The sheriff’s decided that our grace period here in Las Cruces is up?” I guessed.
“Maybe,” Cameron said. “They haven’t tried to raid the clubhouse again, so that’s a good sign. But white vans mean that they’re definitely doing surveillance on us.”
“So what do we do?” I asked.
Cameron shrugged. “Keep your eyes open, and don’t say anything to anyone,” he said.
I rolled my eyes. “I never talk about Red Eyes with anyone outside of the club anyway,” I said, which was true. Who was I going to talk to about it?
“This is about more than just what the club is up to,” Cameron said grimly. “We don’t want them to find out about Ray. If they hear that he’s in the hospital, they’re going to realize that we’re leaderless, and that's the perfect time for them to go on the offensive.”
“You already made me promise not to say anything to anyone about Ray,” I pointed out, feeling a bit peevish. “And I’ve already had my eyes out for police spies in the recruits.”
“Good,” Cameron said, looking amused at how affronted I was. “Then just keep doing what you’re doing.” He clapped me on the shoulder. “Let me know if you have any problems.”
“Yeah, I will,” I told him.
12
Holly
I frowned as I got off the phone with Ryan. Emergency meetings weren’t unheard of in our profession, but I had to wonder what had happened. It certainly wasn’t anything to do with Grant. He hadn’t been up to anything of interest this week. And he hadn’t called me back either. I was worried that I had really botched things with him. I was going to have to find some way to fix things before Ryan found out that I might have failed in my attempts to seduce my target. I doubted that would go over well with the force. He’d probably think that I had objected to it because of my moral qualms or something, but really, I just didn’t know the first thing about seduction. I wished he had realized that before he assigned the mission to me.
When I got to the meeting, I found that most of the other guys were already there, but no one else seemed to really know what was going on either. Ryan came in, his hair tousled as though he’d been running his hands through it. He was full of suppressed energy, like he was right on the edge of the action and just waiting to get down to business. I wondered what could have happened to get him this way. Did he have some lead on taking down Red Eyes? Maybe my seduction of Grant wasn’t necessary after all.
“Thanks for meeting me here on such short notice,” Ryan said, nodding around at the group. “I’ve got a new assignment that I need all of you working on. It seems that one of the members of Red Eyes has been in the hospital for the past week.” He glanced over at me. “I know you’ve seen Grant and Cameron in there as visitors, so I’m assuming it’s neither of them. But we don’t have any leads on who it is.”
I blinked in surprise. I had assumed when I saw Grant and Cameron at the hospital that something was up with Red Eyes, but I hadn’t connected that with the idea that one of the members of the club might be in the hospital. I felt a bit foolish now.
I thought back to what I knew about the club. Who could be in the hospital? I doubted it was one of the core members of the club; we would have known that if it were the case. Ryan had guys posted at the clubhouse and at Ray’s house, as well as at some of the businesses that were known to be loyal to the MC. We would have noticed any unusual disappearances.
No, it had to be one of the other members. The guys that were only sometimes involved with the MC’s plots. Whoever it was, though, I secretly hoped that Grant would go visit him in the hospital again. I’d love to be the one who figured out who was in there. I only wished Ryan’s phone call hadn’t kept me from following the man into the hospital before.
“The surveillance is doing well, and we’re learning a lot of information about how the club operates and how they recruit new members and new business,” Ryan continued. “And Holly is making progress with one of the members that I hope will get us some information on how best to proceed with our takedown actions. But for now, I really want to know who is in the hospital. Any information could help us.”
“You don’t think it’s Ray, do you?” one of the guys piped up. “We haven’t seen him going in or out of his house since we started surveillance there.”
Ryan shook his head. “As far as my sources have heard, at the moment, he’s out of the state on some sort of business. Of course, I don’t have anyone on the inside, but I do have people who keep track of the club’s movements. He’s got a son down in Florida. It’s possible that he’s headed out there for a visit. He’s always kept clear of the area when we ramp up surveillance.”
He looked around at everyone and continued. “I know we don’t have much information yet, but I want to stress again how valuable everything you have been able to tell me is. We’re one step closer every day to taking these fuckers down. It’s only a matter of time before we put them in their place. In jail, hopefully.”
He brought the meeting to a close, thanking everyone again and telling us all to keep up the good work. I lingered while everyone else cleared out of there. “Something on your mind, York?” Ryan asked.
I shrugged, feeling embarrassed. But there was something that I needed to ask. “Are you sure that Red Eyes are the ones that we should be keeping an eye on?” I asked.
“What do you mean?” Ryan asked, narrowing his eyes suspiciously at me.
I held up both my hands. “Don’t get me wrong. I’m not trying to get out of my job or anything. I’m just saying that from what I’ve seen from Grant, these guys don’t seem so terrible. I know they’re stealing money from the local businesses, but it seems like Las Cruces has bigger issues to worry about. We haven’t found anything that links Red Eyes with the drug trade. There could be some other kingpin out there that we’re missing because we’ve got all our manpower focused on this motorcycle club.”
Ryan stared at me for a long moment, his expression somewhere between incredulous and exasperated. “York, I wouldn’t think that I would need to spell this out for you, but these people are the worst of the worst. What you’re seeing from Grant is different. Guy’s a fucking pansy. That’s why I’m hoping that you can weasel your way in with him. But the other guys in the club are stone-cold murderers. And Grant isn’t all that different in his heart. There’s a reason he’s running with them.”
“Do we have any proof of that? That they’re murderers?” I asked. I didn’t mean to challenge him. The words just spilled out of my mouth before I could stop them, but to be honest, I didn’t regret it. I was starting to wonder if Ryan’s obsession with the club was a little clouded. If maybe he wasn’t going after them for the
right reasons.
Ryan’s face practically purpled at my accusation. “York, I’m sure that I don’t need to remind you that insubordination could impact your ability to continue working on this task force,” he said, his tone clipped. “If you’re starting to feel like you aren’t fit for the position that’s been assigned to you, you need to let me know so that I can find someone else who’s willing to put in the effort to get these criminals off the streets.”
I ducked my head, suitably chastised. He and I might not see eye to eye on this issue, but I hadn’t expected him to basically threaten to fire me over something like that. I wasn’t willing to throw away my whole career on my first big undercover assignment. Especially since even though it was pretty clear to me that Grant wasn’t a terrible guy, that by no means made him innocent either. I just plain didn’t know what sorts of things he might really be involved with.
I needed to get closer to him. I’d been saying that for days, but it was time for me to put actions to my words. After this little back-and-forth, Ryan would be even more persistent about pressuring me for more information about Grant. And if I didn’t have anything to tell him, he might start to wonder if I was really trying at all.
Sure enough, Ryan was still frowning at me. “Is there some sort of problem with your assignment, York?” he asked.
I quickly shook my head. “No, no problems,” I told him. But inside, I was squirming. It had been days since I had talked to Grant, and I was starting to worry that he really wasn’t going to call me back.
I needed to go by the diner, I decided. That was the only place that I could think of that I could run into him without making it too obvious that I had been trying to run into him. I didn’t know exactly what I’d say when I saw him. Maybe I needed to apologize for the direction that the other night’s conversation had gone, but what if it wasn’t that at all? What if he just wasn’t interested in me?
I had to believe that he was interested, though. Why else would he have agreed to walk me to the library, given me his phone number, and agreed to go out for drinks with me? No, I must have done something wrong, and now I needed to make it right.
“Keep me posted,” Ryan said shortly before stalking out of the room, leaving me in there on my own.
I sighed, deflating a little. It felt like I had just failed my first test. And I hated that feeling. I hated that this was the way that things were going for me on the police force. This had been my dream for as long as I could remember, but what if I just simply couldn’t hack it? What if I wasn’t cut out for this?
What was worse, there was no one on the police force that I felt like I could really talk to about this assignment. Ryan clearly only wanted to hear about whatever information I could learn about Red Eyes. And the other guys all had their own assignments to worry about. Besides, someone like Bill would never have had an assignment like mine. He would never have been tasked with seducing his target.
I felt my blood start to boil. What a ridiculous assignment to begin with. I hadn’t been on board with it, not even at the start, but Ryan had basically blackmailed me into accepting it. Otherwise, I was never going to get undercover work. But that wasn’t fair. That shouldn’t be the way that this business worked. It definitely rubbed me the wrong way.
Could Vera possibly be right? Maybe I should find a different line of work. There were plenty of people who went through the police force and then turned to law or something else, but I wasn’t ready to give up just yet. The more I thought about it, the more determined I became to show Ryan that I could handle this. That I could get the inside scoop, and that I could get whatever information he wanted about Red Eyes. Starting with finding out which of the members was in the hospital and why Grant and Cameron felt the need to go there and visit whoever it was; I doubted that was just a social call. They had both looked too serious outside of the hospital afterward. There had to be something more to it.
I needed to start by getting back into Grant’s good graces. Maybe play the clueless newbie card again. He had seemed to respond to that. Maybe I could get him to show me around Las Cruces or something? He seemed like the kind of guy who couldn’t resist a damsel in distress. If I could get closer to Grant, maybe I would learn something about him that I didn’t want to know.
Maybe I would find out what a heartless criminal he really was.
I had to hope so. I didn’t like the idea of taking down an innocent man, even if it helped secure my place on the police force for the rest of my career. Even if I managed to make a name for myself, that wasn’t why I had joined the force.
13
Grant
On Wednesday, I went to the diner to have lunch on my own. I was still thinking too hard about the Ray situation. About the idea of becoming the next leader of the MC. It was starting to stress me out just thinking about it. Even though I hoped that Ray was going to be fine and that I wouldn’t have to worry about it for a long time.
I was starting to realize, more and more, that I couldn’t picture a future for myself in the MC. That I wasn’t meant to be part of Red Eyes for the rest of my life. But I didn’t know how to tell that to anyone else.
I actually considered talking to Braxton about it. I knew that he was slowly warming up to me, but I also knew that when he had first started training me, he had been sure that I shouldn’t have been part of the club. That I was too much of a pussy to ever amount to much. Even though he had warmed up to me since then, I had a feeling that if I told him that I needed to get out of the club, he wouldn’t be surprised at all.
The trouble was, I was still hiding Ray’s illness from Braxton, and I felt guilty about that. What if Braxton could tell that there was something I wasn’t telling him? The man had ways of getting people to talk, and I wouldn’t put it past him to use some of his most dangerous moves on me.
Besides, I didn’t want my brothers to feel like I was turning my back on them. I just didn’t have the mettle that I needed to remain in the club. But with recruits who still needed training, I was definitely still a much-needed asset for the club. I couldn’t leave that behind.
I knew I was going to the diner a little too frequently lately, that it was starting to become a habit. But I couldn’t help wanting that little bit of peace and quiet. Even though the rest of the guys knew they could find me here, they respected that this was my place. They didn’t bother me here. I could have lunch by myself and try to forget about everything to do with the MC.
When I got to the diner, though, I paused on my way to my normal booth by the windows. There in the back was Holly. She was sitting by herself, a cup of coffee nestled in between her hands, her gaze turned inward. She looked like she was struggling with something.
I had walked out of drinks with her because I knew that I couldn’t get involved with her, but she looked like she definitely could use a friend, and I could honestly use one as well.
I headed over toward her, leaning against the edge of the booth and folding my arms across my chest. “Are you following me?” I asked jokingly. “How do you seem to keep ending up here at the same time as me?”
Holly jolted, looking guiltily up at me. “Uh, Grant. Hi. Sorry?”
“I didn’t mean to scare you,” I said, genuinely feeling bad about the way that she had jumped. “I thought you would have seen me walk up. But you looked like you were pretty lost in thought.”
“Yeah.” Holly sighed, running a hand back through her hair. “It’s just been a rough day, I guess.”
“A fight with your sister?” I guessed because that was the only thing I could think of that would have her looking so morose.
Holly looked surprised and then shook her head. “Nah,” she said, but she didn’t elaborate further. Instead, she cocked her head to the side. “Are you here for lunch?”
“Yeah,” I said. “Are you here alone? Did you want some company?”
“I’d love that,” Holly said, looking relieved as I dropped into the seat across from her. “With the way that
you ran out of there the other night, I thought you must be mad at me or something. Or maybe just not interested?”
I raised an eyebrow at her. “Now you’re just fishing for compliments,” I teased. Because honestly, how could I not be interested? Even today, dressed in a simple blue shirt with her hair pulled back into a messy ponytail, she looked adorably attractive.
“I can’t help it,” Holly said, then laughed. “You’re the first friend I made in this town, and I sent you running within an hour of getting drinks with you. That must be some kind of record.” She shook her head. “People are just so different here than in Montana. I don’t even know how to act.”
“Having a hard time with the adjustment?” I asked sympathetically.
“I guess,” Holly sighed. “I wish that I could say that I wasn’t. I don’t feel like I should be. I mean, it’s not like I moved to another country or anything. It’s just a different state. But somehow, everything feels so different here.”
“I get that,” I said.
“Oh yeah?” Holly said. “I thought you were from around here.”
“I am. Born and raised,” I told her. I shrugged. “So maybe I don’t get it. I’ve never moved states. But I guess I can imagine all the things I would miss if I moved away from here.”
The MC, for one. Even though I wasn’t sure that I wanted to be a part of the club for the rest of my life, I also didn’t want to leave it behind entirely. There was no way that I could ever become the next leader after Ray stepped down, but maybe I could be an auxiliary member, only there if they needed me.
I just hoped that they wouldn’t ever need me.
“What do you miss most about Montana?” I asked. Even though I was sure it would be hard for her to talk about that, at the same time, I wanted to know more about her. And I definitely didn’t want to keep thinking about my own stress. Maybe it was selfish to ask her to tell me about Montana when I knew it might upset her, but I needed a distraction.