The enchanted ring

by Lucy Gillen

  CHAPTER NINE

  DISCRETION, so Rowan had always understood, was the greater part of valour and she decided that discreet silence about her meeting with Michael Doran was the best course to take and the one likely to cause the least trouble. Sean would be almost bound to make a great deal of fuss if he knew, and Laura, although she was less virulent in her dislike, would view the incident with disapproval. It was quite obvious by now that Laura had her heart set on seeing Sean and Rowan married almost as determinedly as Sean himself, and she saw every meeting with Michael Doran as an obstacle to that end. Rowan missed Rupert even more than she had anticipated she would, and most of all she missed him as her confidant, for there was no one else she felt able to talk to quite so freely. Right now, she felt, she would appreciate a long, confiding talk to Rupert about her feelings for Sean and a little advice as to what her answer should be to his increasingly urgent requests that she should marry him. With Laura and Mary Donovan weighing in on his side Rowan wondered how much longer she could remain uncommitted. It was a beautiful mid-September evening with a full rosy sky that promised another fine day tomorrow, and Rowan felt. an unaccustomed flutter of excitement as she walked through the stillness of the garden with Sean. They paused beside the stone seat where she had so often sat with Rupert and she had the strangest feeling that, in the almost dark, the odd little man 141 sat watching them. "Are you cold?' Sean asked when a brief shiver trickled along her spine, and Rowan shook her head. 'No, I'm all right, thank you, I'm lovely and warm.' His arm tightened around her. 'I felt you shiver. I hope it wasn't revulsion.' 'Oh, Sean, of course it wasn't!' She looked up at the dark, good-looking face, full of shadows in the dusk, and smiled half apologetically. 'It it was just that for a moment I felt ' She laughed, a little breathlessly. 'I had the strangest feeling that Rupert was here with us.' 'Rupert?' She saw the dark gleam of his eyes as he looked down at her curiously. 'You're being fanciful, darling is it being out here in the half light? Perhaps we'd better go back into the house.' 'Oh no, please, I love it out here.' 'You're not feeling spooky, about Rupert Brady?' 'No, no, of course I'm not.' He turned her to face him, his hands about her waist, half serious. 'I'm even jealous of him,' he confessed. 'That's how much you mean to me, my darling.' 'You have no need to be jealous of anyone,' Rowan told him, foreseeing the inevitable proposal, 'and especially of poor Rupert.' 'You thought a great deal of him.' It might almost have been an accusation, the way he made it sound, and Rowan, not for the first time, wished he was not so touchy about the subject of other men, no matter who or what they were. She had always been so very independent and she resented anyone showing signs of restricting her freedom, no matter how flattering it might be. 'I didn't know him for very long, I suppose,' Rowan admitted, 'but I was very fond of Rupert and he was a very good friend to me in his own way. He had a 142 special sort of magic somehow that made him different from anyone else.' 'Very different,' Sean agreed wryly. 'I didn't realise quite how much he meant to you.' Rowan frowned, sincere in her assertion no matter what Sean might think. 'He was a good friend, Sean, and there was nothing like that between us, ever.' She stood silent for a moment, her eyes watching the pale shadow of the old stone seat. 'But I miss him a lot. I could always talk to Rupert.' 'But not to me?' he sounded resentful. 'Not in the.same way,' Rowan said. 'Rupert was my my father confessor, if you like.' She laughed unsteadily. 'He knew all my secrets, I think, without my ever telling him.' 'He liked to play the all-seeing eye,' Sean remarked a little sourly. 'Hence that fortune-telling act he tried to-impress you with when you first came.' 'I was impressed,' Rowan told him quietly, disliking his denigration of Rupert. T think Rupert really did possess a gift for seeing well, things that the rest of us can't.' She knew he was trying hard to see her expression in the almost dark puzzled and a little impatient as he had always been about Rupert. 'You mean you actually believed that tale he told you about your future? You really think he knew?' 'I'm not prepared to dismiss it out of hand as you evidently are,' Rowan retorted, and a second later laughed uneasily. 'And I'm sure Rupert would find the idea of us quarrelling about him highly amusing in the circumstances.' 'Then don't let's quarrel,' Sean said, and kissed her gently beside her mouth. 'I don't like quarrelling with you anyway, my darling, I'd much rather kiss you.' As good as his word,' he held her tightly and kissed 143 her until she laughingly protested. 'I'm breathless and a bit light-headed,' she told him, when at last she could say anything at all. 'Good,' he retorted. 'Now say you'll marry me before you come down to earth again.' 'I've a good mind to do just that,' she teased, 'just to teach you a lesson ' 'A lesson I'm ready and willing to leam,' he told her, strengthening his hold on her. 'Please say you will, Rowan.' Rowan could not deny that she felt light-headed and perhaps even a little hysterical as she heard the familiar words yet again, and something urged her to give' him the answer he had waited so often to hear. Perhaps it was the dark, slightly malicious shade of Rupert there on the stone seat that prompted her, but she suddenly heard herself saying in a voice she barely recognised as her own, 'Very well, Sean, on your own head be it.' 'You you mean you will?' She nodded, then realised that it was already too dark for him to see it. 'If you really want me to,' she said. It was obvious that he would rather have had her sound more enchanted with the idea, and she supposed she did sound rather off-hand and matter-of-fact about it, but to tell the truth, realisation was already begining to dawn on her what she had done and she found it discomfiting rather than reassuring. 'Darling!' 'Scan, perhaps ' 'Perhaps, perhaps!' Sean interrupted happily. 'You've at last said yes, darling. I knew you would if I tried hard enough.' He drew her even closer into his arms and kissed her over and over again, whispering her name and soft, 144 j gentle endearments that she could only just hear. It was obvious that Sean, having at last achieved his end, I had no desire to hear any qualifications of her answer, t but Rowan was again hearing Rupert's deep, beautiful i voice reading what he saw in her palm. 'A false love and then a true one. You will make a sad I mistake the first time you love, but in time when you -see more dearly ' i She would not remind Sean of the words, not now it would be too unkind to shatter his happiness with such a reminder. Although, she remembered, it would probably not matter so much to him, since he did not believe it anyway. Laura was so delighted when she heard the news that it was evident Rowan's guess had been right, and she had been as anxious for her and Sean to marry as Sean himself was. She kissed them both delightedly and insisted that some sort of celebration was called for. : Mary Donovan had been equally happy and only too pleased to prepare a special meal for them all and they even fetched champagne from Gallybom to complete the party. Only Rowan viewed the preparations with less than wild enthusiasm and she simply could not dismiss those warning words of Rupert's from her mind. Sean chided her for her quietness and tutted impatiently when she eventually confessed the reason for > it. 'Oh, for heaven's sake, darling, you can't still be taking that nonsense seriously.' He held her close and kissed her beside her mouth. 'I have no doubts at all that you're the girl for me, so why should you ? Rupert dramatised everything, you know that. Now stop worrying about it and try to look as if you're pleased to be going to marry me.' 'Of course I'm pleased, Sean.' She sought to reassure him and at the same time herself. 'I'm sorry if you think I'm being silly, but ' 'But Rupert Brady was a very convincing purveyor of blarney,' he smiled. "I know, my darling.' "It's just that I'd I'd hate to hurt you again,' she ventured, and remembered too late that he had never told her about the girl who had deserted him when he lost his home and all he owned to Michael Doran. She noted the swift frown that drew his brows together darkly. 'Should I know what you mean?' he asked quietly, and Rowan looked uneasy. ' I think you know what I mean, Sean, although although I hadn't meant to say anything unless you did.' 7 For a moment the blue eyes watching her had a dark, angry look and she realised he hated the thought of her knowing about Barbara Clooney. 'It seems I have no secrets,' he said at last, his mouth twisted into a caricature of a smile. 'I suppose Lau
ra told you about Barbara?' Rowan nodded. 'It wasn't just idle gossip, Sean, please believe me.' I He was not going to be easily placated, she could I see that. 'I hope I'm not too often the object of your I girlish chats,' he told her. "Not on that level, at least. I What's past is past and I don't relish having it all raked up again just to give you and Laura something to I gossip about.' I 'Sean, that's not fair! I was sorry about Barbara Clooney and I'm sorry you were so so shabbily treated.' I just don't want to hurt you again in that way, that's I all I spoke for.' 4 He looked at her sharply. "If you're feeling sorry for me, don't. I want your love, not your pity, for God's sake 1' . - I "Oh, Sean, for heaven's sake!' She found him exasper' ating in this mood and was very tempted to walk away and leave him. "Laura told me about it because well, because she said you were becoming fond of me and I doubted it. She said it was obvious you were arid that you hadn't well, she told me about your engagement and what happened when you lost your home.' "I see.' It was evident that he still found the idea of her knowledge not to his liking, but after a moment or two he apparently decided to accept the inevitable and smiled again as he kissed her. 'I suppose I can't be to cross with her after all the good work she's done on my behalf,' he said, "trying to persuade you to take me seriously.' � I only hope I can live up to your expectations,' Rowan told him, her misgivings returned. 'You will,' he assured her, 'I've no doubts at all on that score.' 'I'll try not to hurt you, certainly never deliberately.' 'You won't unless you have regrets about marrying me,' he told her, 'and I shall make quite sure you don't do that.' 'I hope not, but I'm well, I'm not sure I haven't been too impulsive.' He looked at her steadily for a moment. 'I know I love you more than I've ever loved anyone before and I'm going to make you as happy as I know how.' You're very sweet.' Rowan smiled and tiptoed to kiss him. 'And there's one thing I solemnly promise you, Sean, if ever I do change my mind about marrying you, it won't be because you haven't a fortune.' She could not imagine what had possessed her to even speak of changing her mind at this point, except that with the still persistent doubt at the back of her mind was the sudden and disturbing memory of a 147 meadow and a ring of stones. She dismissed it hastily along with the thought of the quite unreasonable seconds that had followed her childish wish. "Change your ' Scan stared at her tor a moment, his blue eyes dark with some expression she could not accurately interpret, then he scowled blackly at a remote spot above her head, his face grim and his fingers cruelly hard where he held her. "If you do change your mind,' he told her darkly, 'I shall know who's responsible, and as sure as I live he'll not get away with it this time.' Rowan wore no ring as yer, for one thing because there had been no time to go into Gallyborn and buy one and she found the fact almost a relief. Once she was wearing Sean's ring, she felt, she would be really committed and, even after three days as his fiancee, she was still in doubt about the wisdom of her impulsive step. She had always seen herself as being absolutely sure of her feelings when she married, or accepted a proposal, and her own uncertainty troubled her. Sean was so often busy these days with more work than usual, and this morning was no exception. In fact Rowan was not too disappointed to have her own company, more truthfully she was glad of some time on her own to try and gather her thoughts as she walked along the narrow lane, her thoughts far away. There was an autumn nip in the air and the first shading of gold on the trees. With September more than three parts gone already it would soon be too cold and wet tor her to venture tar and the fields could become dangerously bogged near the water, she knew. In the meantime she would take advantage of the remaining fine weather and continue to enjoy her walks. It was almost without thinking that she walked along the lane that led to the little church where she had seen 148 g Rupert laid to rest, and just as absently she went through the curved wooden gate and into the church yard. There was no disturbing 'new' look about the turfed mound now, only a kind of sameness with the surround'f ing earth that she thought Rupert would have approved of. It brought things down to the basic simplicity of just being that he had always preferred, but she wished : she had brought some flowers from the garden when she saw the sad state of the ones already there. She did not feel morbidly tearful, but she stood for several minutes remembering how often she and Rupert had talked and laughed, absorbing the quiet tranquillity of the place which even the brief sound of a passing car failed to disturb. Rupert had loved the quiet of the country. A faint shushing of approaching footsteps brought her back to reality and she turned to see who else was visiting the churchyard, starting nervously when she saw who it was. Grey eyes regarded her anxiously for a moment, then lightened in relief when she appeared dry-eyed. Hello, Rowan.' She hastily lowered her eyes and wished she could do something about the way her heart was behaving, thudding anxiously against her ribs. Even after several weeks she was always reminded of those few moments in the meadow at Thornhill, every time she met him, which was much less often lately. "Good morning, Mr. Doran.' His mouth curled briefly into a wry smile and the familiar mockery shone in his eyes as he looked at her steadily. 'You're very formal,' he told her. 'Is it your. new status lending dignity to your usual disdain?' Rowan felt the blood flow warmly into her cheeks and she tilted her chin, almost without realising it, at 149 the defiant angle he knew so well by now. 'I presume you're referring to my engagement to Sean,' she said. 'What else?' He cocked an enquiring brow at her and smiled. 'I haven't been misinformed, then?' She shook her head, trying again to still that unsteady beat that pulsed under her ribs. 'I am engaged to Sean in a way,' she admitted cautiously. 'In a way?' The brow rose even higher. "All right,' she admitted crossly, T am engaged to him, but I'm surprised you know about it. It's not public knowledge yet.' His smile was broader now and sent those intriguing little lines darting from the corners of his eyes and mouth. "Mary Donovan knows,' he reminded her, "and she's on speaking terms with one or two of my poor downtrodden tenants. Word gets around in a place like Bogmoor.' 'I see.' It was almost inevitable, of course, that Mary would gossip, especially as she was so pleased about the affair and, almost as inevitably, Michael's tenants would pass on the news to him. Despite her description of them as being in dire straits and Sean's condemning Michael Doran as the reason, she had to admit that the people who lived in the little stone cottages appeared to be on excellent terms with their landlord. 'You don't exactly look as if you're bursting with the joys of a newly engaged girl,' he remarked with a hint of malice. He glanced down at the green mound at their feet and sobered slightly. 'I didn't expect to find you here, either.' 'I do come sometimes,' she allowed. 'I was very fond of Rupert.' 'And you still miss him?' She nodded. 'I could talk to Rupert.' He cocked a quizzical brow again. 'But not to Sean Maxwell?' 1KO The accuracy of his guess was discomfiting as usual [ and she shook her head. 'It's not the same,' she said. , 'No,' he conceded, 'I suppose it isn't.' : She had expected further and more sarcastic comment on her engagement to Sean, but he appeared to i have forgotten the fact already and for some reason or I other his easy dismissal of it rankled. Heaven alone knew what made her say what she did, unless it was Rupert's mischievous spirit at her elbow, but she looked at him, half challenging, from under her long lashes. 'Isn't it usual to say a few appropriate words on these occasions?' she asked, and he arched a brow quizzically. 'What occasion?' he asked. Rowan wished she had left the impulsive question unasked for she could feel the warmth in her cheeks when she met his eyes. "My my engagement to Sean,' she told him. "People usually wish the girl happiness and congratulate the man, don't they? Or have I got it the wrong way round?' He shook his head slowly, the grey eyes dark and gleaming with something she could only guess at. 'No, you have it the right way round, Rowan, but saying it would be rather superfluous in this case, wouldn't it?' Rowan frowned. 'I don't see ' 'You should,' he interrupted with a smile. 'You must know I wish you every happiness, but congratulating Maxwell would, I feel, be rather premature.' Rowan bit on her lower lip, her hands curling tightly in the pockets of her coat. 'I don't understand you,' she said, and he smiled. 'I believe y
ou, but I understand you, better than you realise. Rowan.' 'Do you?' She was too surprised to be angry. He glanced down to where her hands showed bulkily, 151 pushed into the pockets of her coat. 'Are you wearing a ring yet?' he asked. "Or have you managed to delay that final commitment so far?' Again, his uncanny accuracy startled her and she gazed at him for a moment, wide-eyed, before answering. 'There there hasn't been time to buy a ring yet,' she told him. 'Sean's been very busy, and with the weekend in between ' She bit her lip again, a sparkle of anger in her eyes. 'I don't know why I'm telling you all this,' she said shortly. 'It's no concern of yours whether I'm wearing an engagement ring or not.' 'None at all,' he agreed, a devil of mischief lurking darkly in his eyes and reminding her irresistibly of Rupert in one of his teasing moods. 'Then then kindly mind your own business,' she said, and moved past him and along the path to the gate. She would have hurried on and out into the road, but, as she reached the covered shelter of the old lychgate a hand on her arm stayed her and she saw that the devilment had given way to something more indefinable and disturbing. 'I do wish you every happiness. Rowan,' he said softly, 'you know that, don't you?' 'Yes yes, I think I do.' It was suddenly terribly difficult to meet his gaze. 'Thank you.' 'May I kiss the bride?' The request was not only unexpected but apparently serious and she felt the blind, dizzying rush of blood to her head as she looked at him. He had kissed her three times in the past and had never bothered to be formal enough to ask her permission first, and the change made her even more uneasy. ' I don't think that's necessary to politeness, Mr. Doran.' 'Whether it's necessary or not, it's what I'd like to 152 do,' he told her, and Rowan stared at nun uncertainly. "Silence means consent,' he told her softly, and before she could say anything at all his arms were round her and his mouth covering hers so that she could not have voiced a protest even had she wanted to. It seemed secluded and curiously secret under the weathered old wooden archway, and there was a sense of security in her suddenly as he held her mouth, gently but with enough feeling to set her pulses hammering wildly. 'Michael, no!' It was too late to protest so vehemently now, she knew, she should have done so before he kissed her like that, but she had not expected to feel quite so helpless and unresisting. She should have remembered, of course, from the last time at Thomhill, and the thought of what it might do to Sean if ever he found out at any time lent strength to her protest. "Please let me go!' Rather surprisingly, he released her without argument and stood for a moment looking down at her with something of the old arrogance in his gaze. 'You don't have to look so self-righteous,' he told her, a bit impatiently, 'you haven't got Maxwell's brand on you yet, and you can't seriously claim that you disliked it all that much.' This time his accuracy had a cruel edge to it and she looked at him, feeling horribly guilty, but at the same time furious with him for being so blunt, her eyes sparkling angrily green. 'You're the most arrogant and insufferable man I've ever met,' she declared, clenching her hands tightly, 'and you have no right to say that to me I' 'Oh, come on!' he insisted, too quiet and self-confident by far. 'You're a very kissable woman. Rowan, and you can't blame any man for taking advantage of it.' 153 'You take advantage of anyone,' Rowan retorted, 'not just me.''Poor little village maiden,' he taunted, 'swep off her feet by the wicked squire.' He chuckled deeply, his eyes glittering. "I didn't notice you struggling to escape my repugnant clutches,' he told her. 'Admit it. Rowan, you're not as much angry as feeling guilty about Maxwell, are you?' Rowan stood, trembling and horribly uncertain, fearing what he said might be more than half true but hating to hear it put so crudely. " I wish I'd never spoken to you in the first place,' she told him. 'Oh, I can't agree with that,' he laughed. 'I love teasing you. Rowan, you react so beautifully and you really don't mind being kissed, do you?' Rowan could feel her hands shaking despite the way she held them clenched tightly at her sides, and she looked at him, half angry, half reproachful and shivering with uncertainty, then turned quickly and hurried back the way they had come. A few moments later she heard a car start up and realised for the first time how he came to be there. It must have been him that she heard arriving earlier when she was so preoccupied and he had seen her from the road. It was a blessing that Sean had not driven past while they had stood in the shelter of the lychgate. She walked slowly back to the little mound of turf with its sad scattering of yellow petals and stood for a moment looking down at it, her heart still fluttering uneasily and her gloved hands held tightly together. 'Oh, Rupert,' she whispered, "I wish I could talk to you. T think you'd understand, but I'm sure no one else would.' i54