Pretty Wicked

by Georgia Le Carre

  Two

  I returned to the office fractionally calmer, but filled with a restless unease. I couldn’t figure out what he was doing miles away from home at my local coffee shop.

  I put Natasha our receptionist’s coffee on her table.

  ‘Have you been…crying?’ she asked tactlessly.

  ‘Got some dust in my contact lenses,’ I explained, and walked toward the lift. Stopping by Jen’s desk I put her cappuccino down and she gazed intently at me.

  ‘What’s with you? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.’

  That stopped me cold. She was right. I had. I had just seen a ghost from my past. One I thought never to see again.

  I smiled weakly. ‘Didn’t sleep very well last night.’ I turned away and began to walk toward my office.

  ‘Hey, you know all those mysterious negotiations to buy out our firm?’

  I turned back. ‘Yeah?’

  ‘It’s done. I just got the email. We’ve been acquired. Some American firm. The big head cheese is in town, and we’re all going to get a chance to meet him at two p.m. in the green room.’

  My blood ran cold. What were the chances?

  ‘Who is he?’

  ‘Miko Barokas.’

  ‘Right,’ I said slowly and walked toward my office. It seemed the most incredible thing that after all this time he was entering my life with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer. I went into my office, sat down, put my coffee and purse on my table, and tried to think.

  To dissect the situation.

  Could it be a coincidence? One of those bizarre synchronicities that sometimes happen—someone wants to buy a plum Toyota 2.2 and the next day a man they once met calls them up telling them he is selling his plum Toyota 2.2. Just stupid luck, coincidence and random events colliding like logs in a river.

  It had to be.

  One thing for sure, he had definitely not recognized me. No one from my past could. Not after all the plastic surgeries I had been through. I could barely recognize myself. The big nose was gone and in its place a narrow, straight as a blade little cutie. So: if I had no fear of being recognized as the date he took to a freak party—the memory was surprisingly fresh and bitter—all I had to do was play it cool.

  He would only be at that one meeting to introduce himself anyway. After that, a jet setting, highflyer like him would be gone for good. Miko Barokas had better and more important things to do than hang around one of the firms he had acquired.

  I picked up the phone and dialed my sister.

  ‘What the hell was that all about?’ she demanded.

  ‘I was standing in front of Miko Barokas when you called.’

  ‘What?’ she shouted so loudly into the phone I had to hold the receiver away from my ear.

  ‘I bumped into him at my local coffee shop.’

  ‘No way!’

  ‘Hmm…’

  ‘Are you all right?’

  ‘I’m still in shock.’

  ‘Did the bastard recognize you?’

  ‘Of course not. I’d shoot myself if he did. The girl he remembers is overweight, with dark hair, a big nose, and metal braces in her teeth.’

  ‘But what in heaven’s name was he doing in your local?’

  ‘Apparently he seems to have acquired our firm.’

  ‘Wow! Talk about bad fucking luck.’

  I sighed.

  ‘Are you going to be working for him?’

  ‘I don’t think so. But he is holding a meet and greet this afternoon.’

  ‘Are you going?’

  ‘My absence will be far more conspicuous. I’ll just quietly sneak in and find a seat at the back of the room.’

  ‘You’ve changed your first name, but will he recognize your last name.’

  ‘First off, Willow, I don’t think I made any kind of impression beyond being the perfect date to a freak party. So I’m willing to bet my entire month’s wages that he has totally forgotten the entire episode. And if for some reason he possesses outstanding memory skills that allow him to remember every name he has ever heard, Johnson is actually the second most common last name in America. So I’m pretty safe with that one too.’

  ‘Lexi?’

  ‘Yeah?’

  ‘You don’t…er…care about him anymore, do you?’

  ‘Are you kidding? I hate the guy!’

  ‘Right. Good. Just checking.’

  There was a pause and then she awkwardly asked, ‘How’s Nigel?’

  ‘Fine,’ I answered quickly. ‘Ah, I better get back to work. I’ll call you tomorrow and fill you in.’

  ‘Good luck, babe.’

  I killed the connection and sat staring at the phone as if it was a scorpion.

  Fuck it! I was not over him. Not by a long shot. That was as obvious as hell. The way I had reacted to him was more than just shock. The truth was I had swooned like a lovesick teenager. Oh God, if he ever found out! I covered my face with my hands. I would have to die with embarrassment. I looked at the time. It was eleven a.m. I had three hours to get my act together. I picked up the phone and dialed.

  ‘Hello, darling,’ Nigel said.

  ‘Hey,’ I said softly.

  ‘Is everything all right?’

  ‘Mmnn… Just wanted to hear your voice.’

  His voice deepened. ‘Oh, darling. How long I’ve waited to hear you say that.’

  Immediately I felt a pang of guilt. I didn’t love him and what I was doing was cruel. I had the sensation that my life was spiraling out of control. I clutched the phone harder and closed my eyes.

  ‘I’m taking you out to dinner tonight,’ he said cheerfully.

  ‘That will be nice.’

  ‘Where would you like to go? I’ll make reservations.’

  ‘Could I decide in a bit and call you back, Nigel?’

  ‘Of course.’

  ‘All right. Speak soon.’

  ‘Lexi?’

  ‘Yeah?’

  ‘Nothing. I’ll tell you tonight.’

  ‘OK, talk later.’

  ‘Bye, bye, darling.’

  I replaced the receiver and stared out of the window. My phone buzzed. I looked at it and took a deep breath. I depressed the buzzer and Janey Masters’ glib, self-serving voice, a voice that knew how to put my teeth on edge, filled my office space.

  ‘Come in here, can’t you?’ she whined.

  ‘Be right in, Janey,’ I said, and getting off my swivel chair made for her office.

  Janey Masters was reed thin and very chic. She wore her hair in a shining bob, painted her lips and nails French red, and loosely draped exorbitantly expensive scarves around her scrawny neck. She had decided many years ago to retain only a small portion of her soul.

  ‘Close the door,’ she said, not taking her eyes away from some papers on her desk.

  I closed the door and went forward.

  ‘Have you seen the email about this afternoon’s meeting with Miko Barokas yet?’

  ‘No, but Natalie told me about it.’

  She raised her head. ‘The takeover was all very cloak and dagger. Bit odd if you ask me. Have you heard anything on the grapevine?’

  I shook my head.

  ‘Right. Well, will you go a little earlier and save me a seat up front?’

  I bit my lip. Shit. There went my plan to sneak in and hide somewhere at the back. ‘Of course.’

  ‘Thanks,’ she said and dropped her head to her work.

  I stood there uncertainly. ‘Was there anything else?’

  ‘No, you can go now.’

  Honestly, she could have told me on the phone. Sometimes I didn’t feel like middle management at all, more like her girl Friday with her constant efforts to make me get her lunch and pick up her dry cleaning ‘since I will be in the area anyway’.

  ~~~~~

  Three

  I closed her office door and made my way to the toilets. There was no one else there so I rested my palms against the tiled wall and looked, really looked, at myself in the mirror. I l
ooked pale, but it was impossible to decipher the expression in my eyes. It could have been hate as much as it could have been pain or a terrible, terrible love. All kinds of unfamiliar emotions ran wild inside me.

  I stepped back, away from my own expression. I had nothing to be afraid or ashamed of. I was not the one who had behaved badly. He may have been drop dead, hold all the phones gorgeous, but he was also a shallow jerk and I hated him. What he did to me was unforgivable.

  It pushed me into therapy for years and caused me untold emotional pain. The end effect was a path of needless cosmetic surgeries. The doctors had already warned me that if I carried on I would become a real freak, like those celebrities with the hideously swollen cheek implants, balloon lips, and eyes that slanted upwards into their foreheads.

  I lifted my chin and stared into my own reflection. I was not going to run from my past or my old demons anymore. I was here first, and I did a first rate job, even if Janey Masters would rather die than admit it. I squared my shoulders, tucked in a corner of my plain white blouse that had come out of my brown, pencil line skirt and left the bathroom.

  At one forty-five I made my way to the green room and left a note on one of the front seats to book it for Janey. Then I left the room and went back to my office to wait nervously for another nail biting ten minutes.

  At one fifty-five I slipped into the meeting room to the sight of a furious Janey gesturing to me. Great, somebody had removed my note and taken the seat. In a panic I ran out of the meeting room into one of the nearby offices. I borrowed a chair from behind one of the tables and rolled it into the corridor. I glanced at my watch. Two minutes to two. I lengthened my stride, but three yards away from the door to the green room I saw Miko striding toward it from the opposite direction.

  For a moment I was torn between getting a strip or two torn off me by Janey or running into him again. I decided to have a strip or two torn off me and I slowed right down, but instead of opening the door and going in, he stood with the door open waiting for me. If he was surprised to see me he didn’t show it. Instead his face was totally impassive, and his eyes black and impenetrable. Cursing inwardly, I pushed the chair toward him.

  ‘Mr. Barokas,’ I said civilly, my face bright red as I sailed through the door he was holding open for me. Everybody turned to look at me and Janey was giving me the evil eye, until, that is, she saw Miko, and then she melted into a puddle. I pushed the chair right to the front of the room and Janey walked to it, smiled tightly, and sat down.

  Hastily, I made my way to the back next to one of the guys in Accounts. He grinned at me and made space. I leaned against the wall and watched Len from Human Resources welcome and introduce Miko to everybody.

  Then Miko stood and took the floor. He spoke about his vision for our company in the future. Riveting stuff. He was articulate, focused and utterly charming. The charisma was oozing out of him. In fact, he was so smooth he reminded me of oil pouring from a bottle. No gaps, no coughs, no ums or ahs while his brain found the right word to buy our loyalty. His tone was actually hypnotic.

  The room was totally silent. Captivated by his dynamic energy, I watched as he prowled the floor restlessly with the taut grace and power of an animal in the wild. I looked around. Like me, everyone else in that room was staring at him. But for different reasons. They all wanted to be as smooth as him. He made them think they could be as smooth as silk.

  Once, he turned suddenly, caught, and held, my eyes for some seconds. The intensity of his gaze was searing. It made me feel almost giddy, and I dropped my gaze hastily.

  By the time he thanked everybody and said how much he looked forward to working with us all, he had everybody eating out of his hand. He reminded me of Leonardo DiCaprio in the Wolf of Wall Street. After he had requested senior management to join him in the boardroom, he broke into a grin, boyish and confident.

  ‘That’s it for today,’ he finished, and the room erupted into enthusiastic applause. He walked toward Janey and said something to her, and she swiveled her head around and stared at me. Oh shit. Now what? I began to edge toward the door.

  ‘Ms. Lexi Johnson.’

  I stopped and slowly turned my head in the direction of his voice. He was smiling at me and Janey was scowling. ‘Could you come here one moment please?’

  I steadied my nerves and started walking toward him.

  ‘Are you feeling better now?’

  I cleared my throat. ‘Much better. Thank you.’

  I felt my cheeks become warm at the way he was staring at me. I darted a glance at doesn’t-laugh-hardly-smiles Janey, and she was looking at me with a mixture of fury and envy.

  ‘I didn’t realize you two had met,’ she said sweetly.

  ‘I…er…bumped into Mr. Barokas at the coffee shop without realizing who he was.’

  Janey smiled coldly. ‘Were you poorly earlier?’

  ‘It was nothing really. I felt a bit faint at the coffee shop. I thought I might be pregnant. But...’ I smiled brightly. ‘False alarm. Must have been something I ate.’

  Her eyes flickered. She was a cunning fox. She knew I was up to something.

  I took my eyes away from her and looked at Miko. He was gazing at me with a look I saw in men’s eyes all the time. Wow! He wanted to fuck me. A part of my brain celebrated. The idea that he found me, the freak, attractive was so heady I almost felt high with pleasure and confidence.

  I had successfully reinvented myself. Made myself someone the great Miko Barokas actually desired.

  ‘Well,’ I said looking up through my eyelashes shyly and slyly at him. ‘Thank you for rescuing me.’

  ‘Not at all.’

  ‘I guess I better be going then,’ I purred and turned to leave.

  ‘Ms. Johnson?’

  I turned around slowly. ‘Yes, Mr. Barokas.’

  ‘Do I detect a slight American accent? Have you spent time in America?’

  ‘Yes, I spent a few years there,’ I confirmed vaguely, and then smiled knowingly.

  He would have said more if Janey had not interrupted. ‘Please come this way, Mr. Barokas. The rest of the senior management are waiting for you.’

  For a few more seconds he stood looking at me, then he nodded, and followed Janey out of the meeting room.

  The breath I had been holding came out in a whoosh. I watched them walk away with a small smile. I had enjoyed that. Flirting with him. Playing with him the way a cat plays with a mouse. Once he had done that to me and now it was my turn. I turned away humming to myself.

  It was just the two most important laws of the universe working. As ye sow, so ye shall reap, and another little known one, the law of giving and hospitality: if you believe something to be true, then sometime in your life you will be called upon to demonstrate that particular truth.

  I believed myself to be out of love and in hate with him. Now was when I demonstrated what I claimed. Now was when I took revenge. My palms were sweaty. I went back to the bathroom to wash my hands. When I looked at the mirror I was surprised. What a difference three hours could make. I watched the expression on my face. It was full of cold intention. I would make him suffer as he had once made me.

  I was at my desk when Janey came in, more than an hour later. She looked put out, but was trying not to show it.

  ‘Have you finished with that McCallum report?’

  ‘Nearly.

  ‘Good. Um… Are you doing anything tonight?’

  ‘I’m having dinner with Nigel.’

  A triumphant smile slid across her red mouth. ‘Oh, what a shame! I was going to invite you for drinks at Jamie’s, but you’re obviously not going to stand up Nigel for the likes of us. We’ll go out another time.’

  Jamie’s was the local restaurant bar in the next street. I looked into her thin face and knew exactly what had happened. Miko had asked her to invite me along.

  ‘What a coincidence,’ I said smoothly. ‘That is exactly where Nigel is taking me.’

  She looked at me as if she was seei
ng me for the first time. The way a woman does when she is sizing up her competition. She drew herself up to her full height. ‘Super. We’ll see you and…Nigel there, then.’

  ‘That’ll be nice.’ Something told me I’d soon be out job hunting, but I was not backing down. Miko was getting what he gave even if I lost my job in the process. I needed closure and this was closure.

  Utterly unrepentant, I watched her rigid body stalk out of my room.

  ~~~~~

  Four

  Nigel picked me up from work, and shame on me, I was too caught up in my own twisted thoughts of revenge to see just how excited he was. The man had a secret and he was dying to spill it. And when I finally realized it was too late.

  We walked into Jamie’s, and Luigi, the manager, danced his way up to us. I loved Luigi. He was so over the top and so Italian he was almost a parody. But he made the place tick. Gave it drama. That evening he let his bold eyes travel admiringly down my body. I didn’t take offense. It was part of his job.

  ‘I have the best table saved for you,’ he smilingly whispered to Nigel, and then turning around hissed at one of his waiters.

  From the corner of my eye I could see my work colleagues gathered around Miko, hanging on his every word as if he was some prophet. God! People are such sheep, so easily led, I thought disgustedly. Just as I was about to turn my eyes away, Miko looked up and caught me looking. And suddenly it was as if there was no one else in the room but us. Something passed between us. As if he had reached out and touched me.

  I shivered and broke the connection.

  This was not the way it was supposed to work. I took a long breath and looked again at him. He was still gazing at me. I smiled slowly. A come hither look. An invitation. Something shifted in his eyes. He had caught the invitation. Good. That was more like it. I turned away. Nigel put his hand on the small of my back and led me away to our table.

  At the table we ordered our food and as I leaned back in my chair I saw Miko make his way toward us. His eyes were on me and I realized he was as helpless as a moth to a flame in the wake of his desire for me. For the new me. The me that was tucked and nipped and dyed into perfection. When he stood at our table, he seemed very darkly handsome compared to Nigel’s fair and proper English features.