Absolution: A Dominion Novel

by Lissa Kasey

  “Just in time for the final fight of the night,” Max said. He smiled at me. “If you ever feel the blood lust getting to you, come here and the smell will kill it fast enough. Shifters stink, though their blood tastes all right. Not as good as witch blood, but better than those punks in the alley.”

  The stench made me a little queasy. I hadn’t blown blood chunks since the first night of my change and wasn’t going to do it now.

  “It’s really awful,” I agreed. I didn’t think I could get past the stink to try tasting a shifter. Did they all smell that bad? Like wet, sweaty, dog piss?

  No one noticed us as we stepped in close to the last cage. I moved around to the edge, away from the others in case I needed to bolt. I had to breathe slowly to filter out the smell. Not like I had to breathe it was just habit. But, God, the smell. Gross.

  Inside the wire ring something that looked like an overly muscled version of a horror movie wolfman stood, flexing his semi-furry arms and throwing spittle from his elongated snout. He wore nothing. His oddly bald sex hanging large and heavy between his legs, showing arousal. Maybe the fight got him off like that guy in the alley? His hands curled in a mix of human and wolf with long sharp talons and his legs hunched, bent wrong like a dog. Nothing about him was appealing. I wondered where all the romanticism with shifters came from. In comparison, a witch who changed flawlessly like Seiran, Jamie, or Kelly was so much more beautiful. Perhaps it was magic that made the difference. Science could only make humanity uglier, but magic—that was a dark beauty that created some of the most heavenly and devilish things in the universe.

  A man moved across the ring, yanking off his shirt and pulling on a pair of boxing gloves. I couldn’t imagine how they’d help him against the shifter. He looked scrawny compared to the hulking, fur-covered monster across from him. He couldn’t be human though, since Max said this was a non-human event. Fight clubs for supes. The gambling portion of it probably made it as illegal as hell. The man in the corner with fists full of money probably worked for Max. But local law enforcement wouldn’t care. So long as none of the norms were hurt, they’d turn a blind eye.

  “Who’s the human-looking guy in the ring?” I asked Max. “He’s not really human, right?”

  “Not hardly,” Max replied. “Almost vampire, but not quite.”

  Was that even possible? The man was handsome enough, broad in the shoulders, medium brown hair, and just the slightest of red haze to his eyes. A vampire then, even if Max said no. Did any other creature have that red haze when they let the monster out? I couldn’t recall anything from all of Seiran’s lessons.

  The bell rang and the fight began. I didn’t watch. The beautiful man would fight the beast. Would he live or die? Did it matter? We were all monsters here. I turned away overwhelmed by my depression again. I was just like them, wasn’t I? I may not look so scary on the outside, but the monster inside had claws just as sharp and bigger fangs.

  I made my way out, sucking in the deep cold air.

  “No one dies,” Max told me, having followed me out. “At least not often. Accidents do happen.”

  “I don’t want to be just another monster,” I told him.

  His smile was sad and somewhat self-mocking. “But we are, aren’t we? I do a lot just to feel. You’re young. You still pulse with emotion. What you saw inside scared you, depressed you, and yet excited you. I long for all of that.”

  Was that all I had to look forward to? An eternity searching for emotion? “I don’t want to be like that.” It was probably rude to say so, but the truth. “Empty.”

  “Happens to all of us in time. We live so long the world kills us from the inside out.”

  “Are you looking for a way to die, Max?” I had to ask. Gabe mentioned he’d been nothing but a walking corpse before he’d met Seiran. Max probably wasn’t any younger.

  “Looking for a way to live, my young friend. Call if you need me. I can show you things that Gabe would not dare.”

  Because Gabe was one of the good guys and Max was just fire I’d already burnt myself with twice. “Thanks,” was all I offered as I headed back out into the night. It was getting late, and I had to get to the club before midnight. Gabe expected me to meet with the cibo I’d approve before the night was over.

  I stopped at a gas station to clean up. The attendant didn’t say anything about the bottle of water and chewing gum I bought. Though he did give me the stink eye when I asked for the bathroom key. Did he think I was gonna camp out in the crapper for the night? I would rather have found a dumpster to sleep behind.

  When I stepped inside the stink nearly had me hurling again. Did they ever clean this place? I went to the sink and washed my face, taking time to scrub away small bits of blood spatter. The hunger must have been bad to make me so messy. At least my shirt and jacket were still clean. I could only imagine what it would be like to go meet the cibo with some other guy’s blood on me. Sort of like paying for a second whore when the come of the first still stained the skin.

  The mirror made me look so ordinary. I’d fed so my eyes wouldn’t turn red even if I willed them to for at least a few more hours. Though I did try. Sometimes I let the monster out and just stared at him for hours. It still shocked me when I’d fall out of a weird trance and find only myself in the mirror.

  I popped a half dozen pieces of gum. The strong cinnamon of it would kill any lingering blood and it burned my tongue. The stuff was nasty, but it was the one thing that Gabe swore by that I always used.

  I made my way to the club hoping that the guy I’d spoken to online a couple dozen times wasn’t some clingy jerk who wanted to be my vampire groupie. Gabe wanted me to have a regular blood source. Someone to feed on that would help me build a bond with humanity. I didn’t care either way. Humans weren’t all that great. I’d spent most of my life being one. Vampire wasn’t much of an upgrade.

  The last thing I needed was someone fragile that wanted me to be his savior. I was no one’s hero dammit. No matter what Gabe and Sei tried to convince me of most days. I was okay being the bad guy. At least the role fit.

  Chapter 2

  The wailing pulse of music reverberated through my spine and the lights flashed in time to it. A headache was forming behind my eyes, and in my gut a tingling need grew. Gabe often reminded me that I was young and everything made the bloodlust worse. He hadn’t been wrong so far, no matter how much I wished for a reprieve.

  I shifted in my seat, turning to get a better angle of the crowd. Men and women gyrated, clothes almost non-existent. Pulses raced with lust and excitement. If I had been human it might have been appealing to join the crush of bodies, heat, and sweat. But I wasn’t human anymore and they all reeked.

  Still I wanted to gorge on them all.

  The bottle of QuickLife in my grasp should have taken away the edge. Older vampires swore by the stuff. I could barely tolerate it. It tasted like I imagined liquefied shit to taste like. And really wasn’t that what blood was? At least real people tasted better. Maybe it was the warmth or even something as spiritual as the soul, but I’d rather dine on the lowliest of people than drink the shit they put in a bottle. That was why I was here. Even nibbling on the two thugs earlier had only dulled my hunger. I really longed to drink deeply of someone but feared killing them. Norms could only take a few gulps before they got dizzy and there was a chance they’d die. Witches, shifters, and vampires lasted longer but weren’t exactly ideal prey since they fought back.

  Sitting on the fringes watching the crowd made me feel like the predator I was. Gabe had frowned on my choice of seats. He wanted me to interact, seduce, and relate to them. I often wondered where the romance was. Books and movies made vampires sound so great. People didn’t have a romance with their cheeseburger. Why did I have to have one with my food?

  Being a vampire drew the hanger-ons like flies. Gabe warned me they only wanted to use me to be turned and that wasn’t allowed. I didn’t want any of them anyway. Couldn’t imagine being stuck with any of
them through whatever semi-immortality was granted via vampirism.

  My old high school bullies would have laughed themselves hoarse at the thought of me being the guy everyone wanted. Little dorky Sam Mueller with his slanted eyes and dark clothes. They’d always called me Goth, though I’d never been. I guess now I really was.

  My phone buzzed with a new text from my roommate Constantine. Games?

  Waiting for Cibo, maybe l8er, I texted back. Con was a super-hot playboy covered in tattoos who just happened to land as my roommate when his sister had gotten involved in some shit. She’d been executed a month ago for trying to kill the Pillar of Earth, Seiran Rou. Now Con and I lived together and spent most nights playing video games until he was too tired to move off the couch and I had to hide from the light of the sun. He played viciously, killing everything in his path and sometimes screaming at the TV. I played stealthily, trying to rid myself of some of the internal demons I refused to tell Gabe about. If the cibo didn’t get here soon I’d be finding other prey for the evening so I could get back to the exorcism.

  Life was good when it was narrow. Despite Gabe’s protests I didn’t want a constant. My luck with lovers had been 0 for 3. It was probably better for everyone if I stayed on the edges and fed only when I needed to from random strangers. I’d been texting the cibo for a few weeks, talking to him online. One chosen out of dozens who had contacted me. I thought if it was someone I could get along with, it would be easier. Now I questioned the wisdom of that. If I didn’t know them, I could bite them and leave them. Feeding was sort of like a one-night stand. I didn’t need to get their name to suck on them for a while.

  The smell of blood permeating the club warned me that my hunger had just about reached its limit before it would take over and choose for me. No matter how much I drank it wasn’t enough, which was why Gabe asked the Tri-Mega—the ruling body of vampires—for help. They sent me a volunteer, a cibo, someone I could feed from regularly to stem the need. All I knew about the donor was that he was Italian, and a half vampire named Luca. I hadn’t known anyone could be a half vampire until I asked Luca how that happened. He said his dad was a vampire and his mom was human, which apparently meant that when he died he would transition to vampire without having an official sire. I hadn’t really pushed for more details.

  When we talked online it was about books, movies, or video games. All the others had wanted to role play me biting them, which was why I’d chosen Luca. He hadn’t talked about it at all until we arranged this meeting. And no pictures exchanged. I’d rather see his expression in person than get the brush off because I was nothing special.

  Luca better be worth the wait, as I’d been waiting almost an hour. I hated places like this and stuck out like a sore thumb. The internal noise was worse than the music. For some reason becoming a vampire had tuned me into the human psychic network or some shit, because I could feel their emotions, and hear a lot of their thoughts. In the beginning I’d basked in the new ability. But now it was an incessant chatter that never stopped. Often, I didn’t know whether I was feeling someone else’s emotions or my own. Gabe claimed it was because I lacked focus, which was because I was always hungry. I didn’t agree. I could pick a single person out of the room and get inside their head, shift their emotions if I needed to. Focus wasn’t the problem, though hunger was always an issue.

  No, the real issue was my ability to amplify other people’s powers. Proximity to me could make even a null’s expanse of power triple. After an incident where a guy doing a trick with his lighter set the bar on fire, I avoided clubs like this on general principle.

  “Sam?” a voice broke me out of my brooding.

  I glanced up at a handsome man. He was probably only a few years older than me—human years—with dark, bed-head messy hair, and dark brown eyes. His faded blue jeans hugged his hips instead of hanging off his ass as was the style, and a snug T-shirt outlined strong shoulders and a lean waist. The stubble at his jaw was more arty than natural. He probably spent a lot of time trimming it to be just perfect which annoyed me because I couldn’t grow facial hair if I wanted too. Overall, he was good looking, the kind of guy who would never have looked my way twice before I’d been turned. It instantly irritated me.

  Was this my cibo? Had I been played and he was just some sort of junky looking for his next vampire fix? But that was sort of the point right? I sighed. Maybe I could use that to my advantage. Keep from getting attached.

  “Yeah?”

  He held out his hand. “I’m Luca Depacio.”

  I took his hand, waiting for the touch to amplify his internal dialogue or emotions so I could read him better. But there was nothing. Just a vague hum of energy more intense than with other vampires and less annoying than humans. He also smelled heavenly. I don’t mean his cologne—his blood. Did that mean he had some sort of power? Seiran smelled good, so did Kelly. Hell, even Con smelled like a steak dinner with a slice of New York cheesecake at the end. Luca’s scent was mouthwatering. Maybe I was just that hungry. I took a deep breath and let go of his hand to keep from attacking him where he stood.

  He slid into the booth beside me. All I could see was the sun-kissed skin at his neck pulsing in time to his heartbeat. The vein stood out like a sign in the desert pointing to a spring. Were all cibos like this? If they were then shit, sign me up for a dozen of them.

  “God,” I whispered unable to focus on his face, words, or anything but that jumping little river of life. I’d waited too long and he smelled too good.

  He dragged me into his lap and pressed my face to his neck. “Feed, then we’ll talk.”

  He didn’t need to tell me twice. I latched on, sinking my sharp fangs into his tender flesh, sliding into the vein with a practiced ease and let the heat of him fill my mouth. He tasted like a thick red wine flavored with a hint of strawberries and chili peppers. Each swallow I drew from him poured through my body and straight to my groin. I had to shift away from him to keep my erection from pressing into his stomach. Feeding had become a turn-on the second I woke up from the death that completed my transition. Survival instinct Gabe had told me, because really who gets off on blood other than serial killers? Only I did now. And God did I want Luca bad.

  I had to yank myself away and take a deep calming breath before I drained him dry while humping his corpse. Crap, he tasted good.

  “You don’t have to stop. I can handle you taking more.”

  I shook my head. No need to get addicted, and he tasted so damn good I was sure that had already happened.

  “I can take care of your other need as well,” Luca’s softly accented words breezed by my ear. He pressed his palm to my cock, squeezing me through my pants. “A full feeding often makes the young very horny.”

  I let his touch linger a moment as I debated with myself on the pros and cons of taking him to the bathroom and letting him have his way with me or better yet bending him over a sink and filling him. He smelled so good. Slightly of blood and sweat—a shower, and vaguely wet dog. Shit, he’d been the guy in the ring with the shifter. I hadn’t been close enough to see his face then, but the body type was right. His reason for taking so long made sense. Oddly enough there was no smell of injury on him. Had he won?

  I sighed to myself. In the end, the choice was easy. I licked his wound willing it to shut and hoping it wouldn’t look like more than a hickey since my healing skills weren’t all that great yet and leaned away from him. His hand fell away from my traitorous dick. “I didn’t ask you here for sex.”

  “No, you asked for a cibo with experience. I have cared for several new vampires.”

  The guy looked all of twenty. He couldn’t have cared for that many vampires. My doubt must have shown on my face because he said, “We didn’t discuss trivial things like this online because you find feeding and sex uncomfortable, but I’m not inexperienced with either.”

  And I was? “I have no problem with feeding or sex.”

  “Unless they go together?” He raised a brow in
question.

  I didn’t need some stranger analyzing me. “This was a bad idea.” I slid around him to the edge of the seat.

  “Have I offended you? I didn’t mean to. I’m only trying to be what you need.”

  “A blood bag? How is that good for either of us?” I shook my head. “You should go back to Italy or whatever. I’ll figure something out. This was stupid.” Even if I had to keep stalking the bowels of the west side to eat. The last thing I needed was another man I didn’t want to say no to.

  He put his hand on my arm. “Sam, your hunger won’t be fulfilled by any normal human. In the old days new vampires slaughtered entire towns just to quiet the need. How will you continue without someone like me to help? Perhaps if one of your witch friends would let you feed from them…”

  “Sei or Kelly? Fuck no.” And I was pretty sure Jamie would rip my head off if he could. I’d hurt his kid brother, and nothing anyone said could make him like me. I got that, but I wasn’t about to play hard up vampire just to suck on him a bit. And Con would freak.

  “Then let me help you.”

  I stared at him. His words sounded genuine. He hadn’t been a groupie like the others. But sadly, I hadn’t known a lot of good people in my life. Trusting a stranger sent to me by the royal pains-in-the-ass of the Tri-Mega didn’t sound smart the first time I heard the idea. Gabe told me food was food. And willing food even better. But he had donors lined up out the door with just the snap of his fingers.

  I pulled out my phone. “I’ll text you.”

  “I’m glad you changed your mind. But maybe you’d let me take you home tonight? Be sure you’ve fed properly?”

  “I haven’t. Changed my mind, I mean. I want you to think for the next twenty-four hours about why you really want to be here. If you’re into getting bitten, then fine. No more games. Just be real. I’m no one’s charity case, and we won’t be fucking.”