Summer Skin

by Kirsty Eagar

  And Jess realised he wasn’t wanting to hurt Mitch, but to help him. ‘The bouncers threw him out! But I can’t even find the way—’ She broke off. Tipene wasn’t waiting for her to finish, but barging his way through the crowd, and, before she lost him, Jess grabbed hold of the bottom of his tuxedo jacket, getting pulled along. As the crowd thinned, Jess let go, keeping pace with him, the coldness she’d felt when she’d first seen Sylvie inside her now, spreading through her chest. She bolted past security and pounded her way down the length of red carpet that led to the building’s main entrance. Outside, things seemed compressed, the air too quiet, too still. Jess’s ears were ringing so loudly that she couldn’t hear anything at first, and she turned back for a moment when she realised Tipene wasn’t with her. She saw him coming through the doors, bringing two of the bouncers with him, maybe the same two from before.

  Then Jess’s ears cleared enough to hear the sound of a scuffle, swearing. She whirled, spotting them. Someone was shouting: ‘What kind of man does that?’ It was Dud, egging the others on. A soft thud, thud, like someone plumping a pillow.

  Then Jess screamed, a loud, piercing noise, wanting to cut through the pack of them.

  Make them stop.

  CHAPTER 43

  TOUGH LOVE

  Late the next morning, someone knocked on Jess’s door.

  ‘It’s open,’ Jess called in a dull voice, not moving. She was lying on her bed, still in the corset and tulle skirt she’d worn to the ball, wishing she could sleep, wanting to crash out of reality for a while, but the world was too noisy: Allie’s empty room blasting out Jessie Ware, a group of gamers engaged in an energetic discussion on the floor below, the sounds of distant traffic as the campus’s day trippers came and went. How amazing that life just carried on as usual.

  It was Farren. Unlike Jess, she’d showered and changed, and looked none the worse for wear after the night before. For some reason, that annoyed Jess greatly. She rolled over, facing the wall. But then Farren lay down beside her, boots and all, and hugged her ferociously hard from behind.

  Jess swallowed. Every time she closed her eyes, she could see it: Mitch pinned, arms pulled back behind him, while a guy punched him in the stomach, in the face—the others crowded around, looking on. And every time, she felt the same overwhelming sense of panic, helplessness, and she had to remind herself it was over.

  ‘You all right?’ Farren asked after a while, raising herself up to rest her chin on Jess’s shoulder.

  Jess glanced round, giving her a wan smile.

  •

  Two days later, Jess met Adrian for coffee down at the Ville. She’d been typing up lecture notes while she waited, just trying to keep her mind occupied, but when she noticed him coming, she froze, her fingers poised over the keyboard. It was odd to see him in casual clothes—jeans and a jacket. He’d tucked his T-shirt in, and it made him seem thinner than ever.

  He ordered, and then collapsed into the chair across from her, placing a stand tagged with the number twenty-seven on the table. ‘Well, I’ve packed up his room. Got everything. He won’t have to go back there.’

  ‘What about the master? Did you talk to him?’ Jess asked.

  ‘Yeah. That was a bit tricky.’ Adrian gestured to her empty cup. ‘Should I have got you another one?’ Jess shook her head impatiently. ‘I know him from my time there, so that helped. I told him that Mitch, unfortunately, felt he needed to leave. That he hadn’t lived up to the standards set by some of his fellow knights.’

  ‘Being human?’ Jess asked, disgust in her voice. She snapped her laptop shut. ‘You shouldn’t have made it sound like it was his fault.’

  Adrian didn’t react, just rubbed his eyes, looking tired. ‘I think he could read between the lines. He asked me if there was anyone or anything he needed to be made aware of.’

  ‘Did you name names?’

  ‘No. I promised Mitch I wouldn’t.’

  ‘Why’s he protecting them?’

  ‘I think he wants to move on, Jess. And for some of those guys, it was just the situation. Alcohol plus shock. They’d all been good mates with Julian.’ Adrian frowned, cleared his throat. ‘Actually, I did give him one name: Owen McCaffrey.’

  ‘Who? Oh. Dud.’ Jess’s face clouded. ‘I hate him.’

  ‘Only met him once and couldn’t stand the guy. Felt like fucking him up for fun.’

  ‘He hit Sylvie.’

  ‘Class. I’m not surprised. I don’t think the master was surprised to hear his name either. Young Dud might find himself under a bit of scrutiny from now on.’

  ‘Won’t change anything,’ Jess said dourly. She systematically ripped her empty sugar sachet into small pieces and let them blow away in the breeze.

  Adrian watched her do it. ‘Don’t you want to know how he is?’

  Jess and Tipene had taken Mitch to Adrian’s in a taxi, and Adrian had dropped them back at uni the same night, after he’d got Mitch sorted with ice packs. The next morning he’d sent Jess a photo of what Mitch looked like: one that clearly showed his black eye and swollen, split lip, the bruising to his cheekbone. So Jess already knew the physical damage, knew that wasn’t what Adrian was referring to.

  ‘Of course I do,’ she told him. ‘It’s just that he hasn’t rung and—’

  ‘His phone’s broken. They smashed it.’

  ‘Pretty sure there’s a landline in that flat of yours.’

  ‘Exactly. And we’re listed. So you could have called him.’

  Jess shook her head. ‘I’m scared.’

  ‘And he’s not?’

  ‘Of what? Me?’

  ‘Absolutely. At a guess, I’d say he’s pretty terrified about what you think of him right now. Because, as we all know, you’re a woman of strong opinions.’ Adrian smiled as he said it, more teasing than trying to provoke her. ‘You are still into him, right?’

  Jess gave him a look.

  ‘Good,’ Adrian said.

  ‘Yeah, but that’s why it’s scary! Because when he just disappeared, I kept thinking that I should have known better, I was an idiot. What if it happens again?’

  Adrian’s chai arrived, and he stuck a finger into the foam, then licked it. ‘Why would it?’ He sipped. ‘Having everyone see you for who you used to be might be a hard thing to face up to, but he’s done it now. The only person left to face up to is you.’

  Jess shook her head, suddenly firm. ‘No. That is not true. And that’s the other reason I haven’t called. The person he’s got to face up to is Sylvie. Because I’ve talked to her, Adrian. She’s a human being. She deserved to be treated so much better. And she’s been damaged by this.’ Jess took a deep breath, exhaled. ‘But I can’t say that to Mitch, because I don’t want him doing it just because I said so. If he has changed, he’ll do it himself. I know he’s talked to her already, but I’m worried it was because of me … or maybe just to keep her quiet. I want him to face her now, after this, after what she did, by his own choosing. That’s my bottom line. Because I don’t think what happened to Julian was Mitch’s fault, even if he does. Julian chose to drive—God, Mitch drives like a fucking idiot sometimes and that’s when he’s sober. But what I really hate is the way he’s treated Sylvie.’

  Adrian studied her for a moment, his face hard to read. Then he leaned back in his chair, his hands behind his head, reminding her of Mitch. ‘Yeah, I forgot to mention that,’ he said casually, glancing around at the other tables. ‘He caught up with her yesterday. Asked her to meet him for coffee. Bub drank his through a straw, apparently.’

  Jess was quiet for a long time. ‘That’s good,’ she said finally.

  ‘I know,’ Adrian agreed, his voice placid. ‘For both of them, I’d say.’ He met Jess’s eyes then, and they shared the kind of look that only two people who love the same person can share. ‘Does that change things a bit?’

  ‘I missed him so much, Adrian. It still fucking hurts.’

  He nodded. ‘Well, be angry, but don’t be stupid. Anyway, I told
you Mitch is immature.’

  ‘You know who sounds immature? You, right now.’

  He arched an eyebrow, looking knowing. ‘But you missed me, too, right?’ Jess laughed, surprising herself. ‘That’s better,’ he told her, warmth in his voice.

  Jess took a sip of his chai, made a face. ‘So what happens now?’

  Adrian clapped his hands together, suddenly all business. ‘Well, for the rest of the year, he’ll live with me, focus on his course, try and get his head together. At least the rugby season’s over, that’s one good thing. He’s not keen to come to uni for a while, though, so I’ll find out what he needs in the way of lecture notes and readings next week, but it won’t be hard with so much online.’ Adrian paused, then cleared his throat, suddenly seeming shifty. ‘But if you meant as far as you and he are concerned …’ He leaned forwards in his seat, taking something out of his back pocket and placing it down on the table like he was laying down the winning card. A couple of sheets of paper, neatly folded.

  ‘A letter?’ Jess asked, eyeing it warily.

  ‘For you.’ Adrian’s eyebrows twitched. ‘Jessie.’

  Jess blinked. She stared at him, her face incredulous. ‘Adrian! I can’t believe you! You’re as bad as he is! What is it with you guys and other people’s letters? It must be hereditary.’

  ‘Possibly,’ Adrian said, sounding thoughtful. ‘When I told Mum about it on the phone, she made me read it to her, too. I wasn’t going to, but she insisted. She said it was okay, because in a way she’s kind of dated you.’ Adrian grinned at Jess’s shock. ‘Don’t worry, it’s not dirty or anything. Just soppy. When Mitch least expects it, I’m going to quote key sections back at him.’

  ‘That’s disgusting, Adrian. A complete betrayal of trust.’

  ‘I know,’ Adrian said, sounding quite pleased with himself. He glanced at her, his eyes amused. ‘Welcome to the family.’

  CHAPTER 44

  SUMMER

  ‘And here we are. Same bat time. Same bat place,’ Leanne intoned. ‘Same bat sheets.’ She was stretched out along the ventilation housing on the roof, her head on Allie’s lap, a beer resting on her belly. She was wearing a swimsuit and shorts, and had fashioned her sheet as a turban.

  ‘Why don’t you let me do your toga for you?’ Allie asked. Her toga, of course, was immaculately wrapped. ‘You’re a third year now. Time to grow up.’

  ‘Hell, no. Then I’d be like them.’ Leanne cocked a finger at the large gathering of girls on the section that looked across at the river, the hum of their voices competing with shrilling cicadas and a sound system booming out Calvin Harris. Leanne sat up. ‘Have you talked to the freshers this year? They’re not even the same species as us. Seriously conservative. Those two girls on our floor? Fucking scary.’

  ‘Imagine what they make of you then,’ Jess said from her position on the siding. Unlike the other two, she was sheet-less, wearing a floaty little cotton dress, her hair piled on top of her head in an effort to stay cool. She swatted at a fly. ‘I miss Farren.’

  ‘We miss you,’ Leanne said dryly.

  ‘Give me a break,’ Jess said, picking at the label of her beer. ‘Things will settle down.’

  ‘Come tonight then.’

  Jess shook her head firmly. ‘Not the toga party.’

  ‘Farren’s not that far away,’ Allie said, lagging a little in the heat. What she said was true, geographically speaking—Farren and two girls from her course had rented a house in Indooroopilly, only a couple of kilometres away. But they all knew it signalled the end of an era.

  ‘You know how the Z-floor boys are in the next street?’ Jess asked, and Leanne and Allie nodded. ‘I went round there with Farren the other day. Instead of washing up their plates, they just put them in the fridge and re-use them.’

  All three of them shuddered.

  ‘Actually, maybe it’s better if you’re not there tonight,’ Leanne said to Jess a short while later. ‘You might blow our cover.’

  Jess frowned. ‘What are you talking about?’

  ‘Knight Rider challenge, phase two.’ Leanne took a large swig of her beer.

  ‘You can’t! You know Michael’s clamping down on that stuff,’ Jess said sternly. ‘He’s pushing an avoidance policy. He’s getting Farren and me to talk to the freshers later this week. Boys, too, not just the girls—thank Christ. About choosing wisely, looking after your friends, that sort of stuff. Treating people the way you’d like to be treated yourself. And we’re going to talk about sex—someone has to. Get it out in the open. Because pretending people are sex toys isn’t doing anybody any good. Farren’s so impressed. His heart is definitely in the right place.’

  Allie sat a little straighter, smiling proudly. So today was a good day then. At other times, from what Jess could gather, there was some niggling tension over the demands of Michael’s new role.

  Leanne burped. ‘That’d be right. What this college really needs is a good war. Bloody Mikey.’

  ‘Michael,’ said Jess and Allie.

  •

  Z-floor seemed deserted, the place eerily silent. It was probably because most people were at pre-drinks, but right then it seemed appropriate to Jess: the place a graveyard without the Z-floor boys. She started down the long, gloomily lit corridor, enjoying the coolness after the heat of the roof. Every door was closed except for one midway down. The door belonging to Z6—Callum’s old room.

  Jess knocked on the slatted wardrobe door blocking the doorway, calling, ‘It’s just me.’ Then she slid the door across. Late afternoon sun flooded the room, filtered by the blinds, making everything golden. Mitch was lying on his bed, holding a battered-looking book with a rose on the cover: Shakespeare’s Sonnets.

  Jess stopped dead. ‘Are you for real?’

  ‘Nuh,’ Mitch said, throwing the book on the floor. He picked up the book he’d really been reading: Ponting: At the Close of Play. A sports biography. ‘Found it in the wardrobe when I was unpacking.’

  ‘Very funny.’ Jess slid the slatted door closed again. ‘Wow, there’s just no breeze, is there?’ A small fan was swinging lazily from side to side on the desk, but it didn’t seem to be doing much more than causing dust mote flurries.

  Mitch shifted closer to the wall, making space for her, and patted his shoulder in the way that meant, Your head here. Jess kicked off her scuffs and lay down.

  ‘Your hair’s hot,’ he told her.

  ‘Trapped sunshine. I’ve been up on the roof. You’ve got to come up there sometime.’

  ‘Yeah, four storeys up. Not going to happen.’

  ‘You get up to my room, all right. And it’s three storeys up.’

  Mitch looked at her, giving himself a double chin. ‘There’s an incentive.’

  And in that moment Jess was struck by the changes in him. He seemed older. Thinner, too—although uni’s pre-season training had already started, so he’d soon regain the condition he’d lost during the off-season. His hair was longer and she liked it that way. And there were other, more subtle, changes. The guy she’d met in the laundry a year ago had gone. Mitch never seemed intimidating to her anymore. His face was calmer, warmer, and there was something in his eyes that hadn’t been there before: humility.

  Grief, it seemed, was something carried, not spent.

  Mitch noticed the way Jess was studying him and kissed her on the lips—but quickly, just a peck. Eager, she realised, to return to his book. He did just that, murmuring, ‘Your hair’s hot, and you taste like beer.’

  ‘I had one with the girls. Pre-drinks. I shouldn’t have, though. It’s made me sleepy.’ Jess reconsidered. ‘Well, really, it’s your fault I’m sleepy.’

  ‘Are you sure you don’t want to go tonight?’ Mitch asked, not listening.

  ‘Couldn’t think of anything worse. Listen to that traffic. I’d hate to live on the first floor. So much road noise.’ Jess yawned. ‘God, I’m tired.’

  ‘Why don’t you sleep then?’ Mitch said, an edge to his voice that made
Jess figure his motivations weren’t completely selfless.

  She smiled. ‘Too hot.’

  ‘Well, how about you just lie there and be quiet instead?’ Mitch said. ‘I’ve only got a couple of pages to go.’

  ‘You know, I never really believed you were a reader,’ Jess mused. ‘I thought you were just trying to impress me.’ Mitch grunted, turning a page. She grinned. ‘Is it any good?’

  He ignored her. But after a minute or so more, he interrupted himself anyway. ‘I had some visitors today.’

  ‘Who?’

  ‘First, Michael Azzopardi—’

  ‘I meant to tell you that,’ Jess said with a jolt. ‘He’s totally in love with you, you know. He was asking me about you yesterday. Wants you to play rugby for Unity. I think that’s why he went with Farren to put a word in for you at the office.’

  It was Farren, though, who’d largely been responsible for getting Mitch into Unity. As the outgoing president of the student council, she had a bit of pull, but Jess suspected it mightn’t have been that much of a hard sell. Everybody at Unity, even those in the office, probably liked the symbolism of a Knights golden boy moving to Unity.

  ‘Yeah,’ Mitch said. ‘Michael mentioned that. I think I will.’ Jess stiffened, about to argue, but he cut her off with: ‘You don’t have to worry if I do. Tipene dropped by, as well. Said to say hello.’

  Jess sat up. ‘Really? I would have liked to have seen him.’

  ‘We’ll catch up. He was here on an official capacity.’

  Jess tensed. ‘You mean as a knight?’

  ‘Well, as a messenger, anyway. The others wanted me to know that there were no hard feelings. That sort of stuff. They thought things went too far. So, it’s done. Move on.’

  ‘You mean the ones who did it?’ Jess asked, her voice hard.

  He shrugged. ‘Some of them.’

  ‘Is Dud back there this year?’

  ‘No, that was funny. Tipene said he didn’t get his residency approved. It couldn’t have just been what Adrian said to the master. I don’t think Jarrod Keith ever liked him either.’