by Jenika Snow
They’d not even gone on a date and she’d been drunk when she’d made the proposal. What if it had been the alcohol talking and there was no way she was interested in him like that?
Running a hand down his face, he looked across the room. Her empty wine glass was still on the coffee table. Standing up, he pulled on his jeans, leaving them unbuttoned as he grabbed the glass and made his way into her kitchen.
Going through her cupboards and drawers, he found the coffee and began working the machine to start the day rolling. Opening her fridge, he stared at all the neatly organized food. Everything was labeled, vegetables already cut and stored, even food already prepped and in containers. The house was neat and clean, but this just screamed a little OCD to him in a cute way.
He saw the bacon and eggs and decided to file away the questions about her fridge for another day. She’d have a nightmare with his own. Cheese, beers, old pizza and Chinese was all in his fridge. He usually had to sniff milk before he dared pour it on his cereal. One day he’d just poured and curds came out. The stink had turned his stomach, and never again would he do that.
Checking the time, he saw it was a little after eight, and so he figured she was sleeping in, most likely hungover, so he was more than okay starting breakfast.
With a pan on the stove, he began to cook the bacon, the sizzle and smell having his stomach growling. Once that was working, he cracked eggs, getting ready to scramble them, and put a couple of slices of bread in the toaster.
The coffee was already going. The scents were driving him insane, and he knew it would only be a matter of time before his future baby mama made an appearance.
Baby mama.
Just the thought of her on his bed, legs spread, taking his cock, taking his seed, was enough to make him harder than fucking rock. He’d never said anything about wanting kids to his friends because they’d simply never understand. They were all about drinking, partying, fucking, and having fun. Settling down with a couple of kids, coming home from work, and enjoying time with his family wasn’t something they were ready for in their life. He’d thought about it a lot more than he liked to admit. He liked the idea of being called daddy by a little boy who looked like him, or a little girl who looked just like Alexis. Hell, he wouldn’t even mind being called her husband.
Marriage was so far off the cards though. Alexis didn’t mention anything about wanting that with the whole family thing. No, she just wanted a baby. There were a few things they needed to work out first, even if she didn’t remember. He couldn’t let this go.
Last night, he’d been so fucking happy even as he placed her on the bed, knowing that they could actually go through with this, that they could be together in every way that counted.
He heard a feminine groan and he turned to look toward the door. There she was.
“Headache?” he asked.
She gasped, looking up at him. She’d pulled the robe she wore tighter around her middle before coming down. She looked so sexy. Her hair was all over the place, and the look of sleep still clung to her. Even though she was probably hungover, she looked beautiful.
“Erm, did we … last night?”
“Did we what?”
“Did we have sex?”
He smiled. “No. We didn’t.”
“Oh thank God.” He raised a brow. “I don’t mean it like that. It’s just that I don’t make a habit of sleeping with men and then forgetting all about it and I wouldn’t want to forget about anything with you.” Her cheeks were now on fire. “Not that I want to assume you’d be unforgettable.”
“You’re cute when you babble.”
“Ugh, not really. You probably think I’m weird now.”
“Not at all.” He poured out some water and found some painkillers. “Here you go. This will help with any headache you might have.”
“I never drink that much. Like ever.”
“It’s okay. Don’t worry about it. I’m not.” He winked at her.
“So you stayed over, I presume?” She grimaced and clutched her head.
“Yeah. I wanted to make sure you were okay. I slept on the couch though. I hope that’s okay?”
She nodded and slowly opened her eyes.
“I’m curious if you remember what we talked about before you passed out.”
She wouldn’t look at him, but he noticed the way her cheeks turned red. He decided to leave her to think about it for a few minutes while he poured their coffee. Placing the mug in front of her, he took a sip of his own, and then got down to business finishing up breakfast. She still hadn’t spoken by the time he sat opposite her at the kitchen table.
“I didn’t know you cooked.”
“I don’t. This is not really cooking. Frying up some bacon and murdering the eggs. I can’t have scrambled eggs that are gooey, it’s gross.”
“These are fine, although my stomach doesn’t feel the greatest. I’m not sure how much I can eat.”
“Eat a little. You’ll feel better.” He took a bite, watching as she ate slowly. “So, last night.”
She glanced at him. “What about it?” She gripped her fork a little tighter.
Deacon waited a few seconds, enjoying another couple of bites of his food. He liked watching her squirm, especially as he knew he’d be the reason for it soon enough. Would her pussy be soaking wet, desperate for him?
Don’t get ahead of yourself.
She may change her mind.
If she did, he was just going to have to convince her to change it right back.
“Do you still want to be my baby mama?” he asked.
She coughed on a piece of food and quickly took a swig of her drink. He moved from his side to quickly rub her back. Having her choke on food wasn’t his intention, not at all.
“You okay?”
“Yeah, yeah, you just took me by surprise then. I wasn’t exactly expecting that.” She smiled up at him.
The temptation to kiss her lips was so strong that he knew he had to take a step back. Last night Alexis had been on the wine. This morning, it was coffee. Taking it one step at a time seemed the most logical to him.
Once he was sitting down, reluctantly without a kiss, he began to eat again.
“I told you about that?”
“Do you remember it?” he asked.
“Vaguely. I thought it was a dream. You know, that I imagined half of it.”
“No, you didn’t imagine half of it. Unless you thought we got down to the basics.”
“No. Of course not. I know you wouldn’t do that. Have sex with me when I wasn’t in my right mind.”
He smiled. “I’d never take advantage of you like that, but I can’t lie and say I don’t want you.”
Her eyes went wide.
“But when I do fuck you, you’ll be conscious and begging for more.”
With his food finished, he sat back, drinking his coffee. Her hand shook just a little and the robe had opened to show a large shirt she wore. Her nipples pressed against it, confirming that she was indeed aroused by him.
“I can’t believe I told you.”
“Don’t be embarrassed. I admitted to you last night that I wanted kids. I exposed a part of myself to you, too.”
“Yeah, but you’re a guy.”
“So? I’ve never told another soul that I want kids or a family. Hell, I’ve never even told you that I wanted that family with you.”
“You want a family with me?”
“We’ll come to that later. I wasn’t lying to you last night, Alexis, when I said I wanted you. I do. I’m attracted to you. I’ve never come over here because we’re neighbors and except for a few choice words, we’ve barely spoken. I don’t make a habit of chasing women who don’t want me.”
“I do want you. I’ve been attracted to you for some time but I didn’t know what to do. I’m not used to chasing guys like this, Deacon. Far from it.”
“I owe that wine a great deal. I want you to have my baby and for us to come to some kind of deal or arrangeme
nt that suits us both. So long as you meant every single word you said last night and it wasn’t all lies.”
“No, it wasn’t lies. None of it was. I want a baby. I had thought about going to sperm banks and seeing about everything but I can’t do that.”
He wasn’t about to tell her the cost of those things either. They were pretty expensive, but he wanted this with her. Not some faceless fucking donor that had no right to be near her. He lived next door. If she wasn’t ready for a relationship, then he’d wait. He’d do whatever he had to do to prove himself to her.
“My first rule then: I don’t want to do this the medical route.”
“You don’t?”
“No. If you’re having my kid, we’re going to do it the good old-fashioned way. The natural way.”
“You want us to have sex?”
“I want you. You want me. Why not let this happen between us? I want to fuck you, Alexis. I want to know how tight you are as I slide my dick deep inside you. I want to be the one to shoot my cum deep in you until it takes.”
“Wow,” she said.
“Are you wet right now?”
“This is—”
“Are you?”
“Yes.”
“That is one of my conditions if we agree to follow this through.”
“We’re going to negotiate?”
“Yes, we are.”
7
One week later
Alexis stood in the aisle of the grocery store, staring at the wall of wine, her mind on other things besides picking a bottle. It had been a week since she and Deacon had come to their baby arrangement. It was still so weird thinking about that, knowing what they’d decided on, what they planned on doing together. And as much as this seemed intense and fast, it’s what she had wanted for a long time.
Five years, to be exact.
But if Deacon hadn’t been on board with this then she knew she would’ve gone other routes. She didn’t need a man to have a family, but she wanted him in her life, wanted him by her side.
She wanted him as the father of her child.
And tonight they were starting on that.
Her hands shook as she exhaled and reached up to grab a bottle of white wine. She didn’t really need any more alcohol, not when it was liquor that had gotten her into this situation. No, the wine had helped her grow a set of balls and be honest. The wine had finally allowed her to do what she’d been thinking about for years. Her inhibitions had been lowered and she’d just finally done and said it. And even if she cared about Deacon, wanted him as more than a sperm donor, if this was all he wanted as well, this baby deal, then she’d accept that.
But she loved him, whether she’d ever admit that or not. For five years she’d had these feelings for him, her emotions growing stronger each passing moment until they consumed her. The very thought of not going through this journey with him was a hard pill to swallow, but she’d desired one person long enough to face reality.
If he didn’t want this as more than her being the mother of his child, then so be it.
Alexis was an adult and could handle the truth. But that didn’t mean it would make it any easier or less painful.
Love—that fickle bitch of an emotion that claimed people and tore them down.
She picked up two bottles of wine and put them in her cart. She finished shopping, getting items to make dinner, hoping that she didn’t ruin whatever was going to get started tonight. It wasn’t like they’d for sure have sex tonight. He was coming over so they could really talk about it, really set down the “ground rules.”
This wasn’t just two people randomly deciding to have a baby because they had nothing better to do. At least that wasn’t the case for her. She wanted to be a mother, had for a long time, and with her nearing thirty she knew time was ticking by. And doing this, going on this journey with Deacon, was something she’d always wanted, even if it seemed crazy.
Later that evening
She stared at the pot of boiling water, bubbles threatening to spill over the top. She’d made a nice home-cooked meal for Deacon. After hearing him say he didn’t get many of those, she’d wanted something even nicer than their last get-together. Or maybe Alexis was just trying to keep busy.
It’s both. God, it’s both.
She’d never been this nervous before—well, when Deacon had first come over last week she had been, but the nerves wracking her right now were on a totally different level. They’d be talking about babies, plans, and how to go about making that their reality.
Alexis would have thought this was the craziest fucking idea in the world, and maybe it was, but it was her reality. It was her dream. And even if Deacon didn’t want her in his life as more than the mother of his child, well, she’d still get her dream. Love or not, she’d finally get a baby. She’d finally be a mother.
She poured the pasta into the water, letting it get al dente before she drained it and added the homemade creamy butter sauce. Once that was done she set everything on the table and took a step back. Baked chicken, a fresh salad, a bottle of chilled wine, and a few other side dishes covered the table. He’d be here in about twenty, which gave her just enough time to head to her room and make sure she was still presentable.
Heart thundering and mind whirling, Alexis went to her bedroom and stared at herself in the mirror that hung behind the door. She’d opted to wear a black formfitting dress, one that was casual but had some lacy detailing so it didn’t look like she was headed to a funeral.
Exhaling, she smoothed her hands over her hips. She’d always thought she was on the thicker side, with bigger thighs and a booty that didn’t quite fit all that well in jeans. But she’d always loved the way she looked, liked how she had a woman’s body, one made for a man.
Made for Deacon.
Her heart started racing at the thought of tonight, of how they’d smooth everything out, discuss how this would all go. Of course it was obvious what would happen, especially since Deacon wanted to do this the good old-fashioned way, but what about after? What if she did get pregnant? How would things go after that? How would he act?
Although she might not have been the most social with Deacon these past five years, she knew him. He was a good guy, one who was loyal, who was genuine. She knew he wouldn’t knock her up then hit the road. He’d stick by her. She just knew it deep in her marrow.
She lifted up the long fall of her hair, turning to the side and seeing if she should leave it up or down. Alexis decided on the former since it would just get in her way, or she’d be tempted to tug at the ends as her nerves grew during the night.
“We are two adults making a deal, one that will change our lives, but a responsible one nonetheless,” she said to her reflection. “What’s the worst that can happen?”
If those weren’t famous last word she didn’t know what was.
8
“It’s just sex.” Deacon stared at his reflection.
They had decided to wait an entire week before actually having sex. That was easy. He was always so busy with work and then there was his friends, who seemed to come over more than ever. He couldn’t figure out a way of getting rid of them, even though all he wanted to do was talk with Alexis. This was a big fucking step, huge.
He didn’t know what had happened, but since coming to an agreement with Alexis over this baby-making thing, he’d seen them everywhere. It was like every single woman had a kid, or grandparents had their grandkids.
Up and down the street, in supermarkets, on the news, on the radio. Even his damn television seemed to be filled with kids, and baby birthing programs. Had it always been there or did he only just notice now after he had agreed to put a baby inside Alexis?
“Kids are natural,” he said to his reflection again.
Then of course, he’d been able to listen in on people’s conversations. He remembered being in the café just days ago and listening to two women talk about their kids.
“I don’t know how they do it,” she said.
>
“Do what?” This came from her very put-together but still a little tense friend.
“All these people that have like ten kids. I have two and they drive me crazy. Dillon, he’s been trained to use the toilet and he took a dump in the corner of the playroom, on the only piece of carpet there!”
“Kids are crazy sometimes.”
“What’s worse is he looked at me, pointed at the spot, and told me to go and clean it. I mean, like I was his maid or something.”
“You’re his mother.”
“I know but please, it’s like he was mocking me.” Another espresso went down.
“You’ve got to clean up shit, I’ve got a cock blocker for a daughter,” the put-together woman said.
“No!”
“Yep. I haven’t had sex in three months because of her. She decided to change the channel and some horror movie was on. I’m the bad mom because I left her alone for like two minutes to take a piss. She ends up terrified and the night my man is not too tired, we’re about to get to the good part and she screams. But that’s okay, it’s my fault.”
“I hate it when that happens,” the crazy mom said.
That wasn’t all he heard. Of course there was also the angels, and they wouldn’t trade them in for the world, but kids couldn’t be put back on a shelf, or traded in.
Kids were for life.
And despite all of that Deacon still wanted kids. He wanted them now and he wanted them with Alexis.
It was a huge responsibility and having a baby, he wanted one. The thought of Alexis being pregnant made him hard as rock and it hadn’t even happened yet, but it was like everything that could go wrong was constantly going around his head, taunting him, and he didn’t know what the hell to do.
The sound of his doorbell drew him out of his thoughts. Checking the time, he saw he had ten minutes before he had to get to Alexis.
Making his way downstairs, he spotted one of his friends’ vehicles through the front window. Their laughter could be heard through the door and Deacon found his frustration growing.