Longing and Lies

by Donna Hill

  Through the window Bernard watched Elliot drive off and wondered if this would be the first time that Jean was wrong.

  Chapter 13

  When Elliot returned to the apartment, the achingly soulful sound of Billie Holiday’s “God Bless the Child,” greeted him. The tightness in his chest began to loosen as the music glided through his veins. He went through the foyer. The lights in the living room were muted, but he could make out Ashley curled up on the couch, a glass of wine at her feet.

  He walked all the way in. She didn’t move and when he looked closer he realized that she was asleep. He slowly sat down on the footstool and watched the even rise and fall of her chest, the way her long lashes fluttered ever so slightly when she breathed. She looked perfectly angelic, a halo of wild, cottony hair framing her heart-shaped face. As if drawn by some unseen force, he reached out and gently pushed aside a curl that hung by her eye.

  She stirred. Her eyes flickered then opened fully. When they focused on him, she scrambled to sit up.

  “Sorry.” He held up his hands. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

  Ashley ran her hand across her face. “I need to get up anyway.” She made a move to stand.

  “No.” He pressed her thigh with his hand, holding her momentarily in place. “Don’t leave.”

  Her heart banged in her chest. The thigh he just touched felt hot.

  “I’m…look, I’m sorry for earlier. I was trying to piss you off.”

  “Oh really. I hadn’t noticed.”

  Elliot gave a short laugh.

  They looked at each other and their tense expressions slowly began to soften.

  “I have my ways,” Elliot began. “It’s not personal.”

  The comment, though made as an appeasement, stung Ashley. She’d been holding on to the false hope that maybe, buried beneath the thick skin, that Elliot had felt something when they’d made love. But they hadn’t made love, she corrected herself. They’d had sex. Plain and simple. And she needed to stop being such a “girl” about it and move on.

  Ashley straightened up and forced a smile. “No worries. I finally realized that you were simply being your obnoxious self,” she said, nonchalant.

  The corner of his mouth lifted. “Touché.” He got up, stood over her. “Think I’ll take a shower. Long day. Then I’m going to go check the surveillance, see if we picked up anything.” He walked out.

  Ashley remained where she sat, fighting the urge to throw something. This man had her totally off her game. She needed to get on track and focus. She got up, took her glass from the floor and walked off to the kitchen.

  She stood over the sink and washed out her glass. If she was going to focus on the case and possibly uncover information about her sister’s abduction, there was no better time than the present. She put the glass in the drain, flipped off the light and began to retrace her steps.

  Elliot was coming from his room. The scent of his freshly scrubbed body preceded him.

  They met in the center of the apartment, the couch and tables separating them. The hallway light cast them both in shadow.

  “Still up?” He tightened the towel around his waist, crossed the open space and walked toward the kitchen. “I have a taste for something,” he said opening the fridge and looking deep inside, “just can’t figure out what it is.” He stood, turned his head and looked at her from above the open door.

  Ashley’s heart was inexplicably pounding in her chest. He closed the door and she would’ve sworn that his towel was missing, even though she knew it was just her imagination working overtime.

  He stared at her for a long minute. His stomach tightened. God, you’re beautiful.

  “Thank you,” she whispered into the security of the semi-darkened room.

  Damn! Had he actually spoken his thoughts out loud? Yeah, he was losing it, and quick. He rocked is jaw back and forth trying to think of a wisecrack comeback. He couldn’t. He ran his hand across the top of his close-cropped head. Now what?

  “Do you mean that?”

  Elliot focused on her, thought about his conversation with Carmen and earlier with Bernard. There must be something incredibly special about Ashley Temple that had dragged him out of his self-imposed prison and stripped him of the prickly armor he’d worn for the past six years to keep any and everyone at bay.

  “Like I told you earlier, I’m a man of my word.”

  Ashley’s gaze faltered for a moment. “I believe that,” she admitted. “And I swear I’m really not the wicked, short-tempered bitch that has taken over my mind. Ask my friends, I’m really likeable,” she cried, playfully.

  Elliot chuckled. “You definitely need to carry around your references.” He waited a beat, enjoying the look of happiness in her eyes. “My friends call me E.”

  A soft smile lifted her full lips. “Hello, E. My friends call me Ms. Temple,” she said with a mischievous light in her eyes.

  “Oooh, do they?” he chuckled. He stretched out his hand.

  Tentatively, Ashley moved toward him, walking around the table, past the chairs until she stood right in front of him. She looked into his eyes, then down at his hand. She placed her hand in his and his warm fingers closed securely around hers.

  “Pleasure to meet you, Ms. Temple.”

  “Nice to meet you, E.”

  The thermometer rose from room temperature to sizzle in zero point ten seconds.

  Inadvertently her lips parted ever so slightly as she stared into his eyes, seeing the same longing, the same desire that she knew he saw in hers.

  Elliot stepped closer, still holding her hand. “This is crazy.” Uncertainty mixed with possibility in his voice.

  “I know,” she whispered, captured by the caress of his smile. “We’re supposed to hate each other.”

  He stroked her cheek with his fingertip, setting off ripples of delight that shimmied through her body. Her eyes fluttered as she let the sensation have its way with her.

  “Hating people doesn’t ever feel this good, I can assure you,” he uttered, a moment before his warm lips brushed hers.

  Her soft moan of pleasure was like finding the key to eternal happiness. Elliot’s soul opened to welcome that little piece of joy. This was what he’d been afraid of—this feeling—and then have it taken away. That he knew he couldn’t do ever again, but maybe for the moment he could pretend that this feeling was for always.

  Elliot pulled her flush against him, his need for her pulsing against the towel that separated them. Her mouth was just as sweet and welcoming, taking him in like one who’d lost their way and had finally found the road home.

  Ashley wrapped her arms around his neck, her mouth, her tongue eager to meld and dance with his. For now, nothing else mattered except the inexplicable need that she had for this man that drove her crazy. She didn’t understand it, and probably never would. All she knew was what she felt: desire. She knew what she wanted, Elliot.

  She gasped in surprise when Elliot suddenly scooped her up into his arms.

  “Your room or mine?” he asked, his voice thick and heavy.

  “Let’s try your bed this time,” she answered him in a sultry whisper.

  “Say no more.” He kissed the tip of her nose, her cheeks, her eyelids as he carried her down the hallway with ease. He pushed open his bedroom door with his foot and crossed the room to his bed in long-legged strides and eased them both down on his king-size bed.

  “We’ll hate each other in the morning,” she said softly, her eyes wide and playful.

  “You’re probably right,” he answered. “But let’s not talk about it,” he said before taking her lips to his own in a long, deep kiss. Finally he eased back. “Why worry about tomorrow when we have this whole night to concentrate on?” He kissed her again, softly, almost tentative this time as if it was the first.

  The gentle exploration was more arousing than when their eager tongues were entwined. Ashley felt herself bloom like a flower awakened by the warmth of the morning sun. Her body grew full
as her veins filled with desire and it flowed through her with growing urgency. Every tight muscle loosened. Her thighs eased apart as Elliot’s strong and sure hands roamed her lines and curves.

  He lifted up and pulled the towel away from his waist. Staring into Ashley’s eyes he took her hand and placed it on his hardened shaft. They both moaned at the contact.

  “That’s how much I want you,” he groaned, squeezed his eyes shut when she tightened her hand around him.

  The feel of him in her hand was an erotic rush that defied explanation. It gave her a sense of power to know that she could make him feel this way—about her. Slowly she stroked him, feeling the veins and muscles tense and ripple beneath her fingertips.

  Elliot groaned deep in his throat, grabbed her hand, squeezed it once, then pulled her hand away from its hold. He eased her back onto the bed, unfastened her pants and pulled them off her, tossing them to the floor. He took off her sweater and it joined her jeans.

  He moved up on the bed and turned on the night light. “I want to see you,” he said, his gaze searing a trail along her exposed flesh. He removed her panties, inching them down her thighs and across her legs like some sexy cabaret routine. He let his fingers caress her, moving across her stomach until it quivered, her inner thighs until they trembled, and ever so lightly across the perfectly tapered curly triangle that shielded the epicenter of her need.

  Ashley moaned and gripped the sheet into her clenched hands when Elliot’s thumb pressed her swollen clit. He massaged it until it was rock hard and fully exposed from its protective sheath. She writhed against his ministrations, her hips rising and falling to capture the pleasure that he was putting on her.

  And then she was hot, wet, suckled and she cried out in blinding delight as his mouth and tongue intensified what his fingers had done. Her head spun and white light flashed behind her closed lids. Wave after shock wave of pleasure jettisoned through her. She tried to scoot away when the pleasure became so intense that it was almost unbearable. But Elliot had no intention of letting her get away. He gripped her hips, raising them higher, leaving her completely open to him and his hunger, to quench his thirst for her.

  Her head thrashed back and forth as his tongue flicked, laved and teased. Reason left her and all that remained was the driving need for release, which Elliot seemed intent on giving her.

  Elliot inserted one finger then another. Ashley groaned but he didn’t stop. He spread his fingers inside of her and gently slid them in and out, bringing tears of pleasure to her eyes. Her strangled moans spurred him on, and when her body began to tense, her thighs spread wider and her body open fully to him, he knew that she was on the brink of coming and he wanted to experience it with her.

  “Ohhhh,” she cried. “Ahhhh…E…yesss.”

  “In the drawer,” he urged in a voice that was raw and gravelly. “Open it,” he ordered as he continued to finger her toward ecstasy.

  Barely able to focus, Ashley reached out to the drawer of the nightstand and pulled it open. She felt around inside and found a condom package.

  “Put it on me.” He pressed his thumb against her clit and her hips rose and bucked against his hand. “Do it.” He could already feel the moisture forming on the tip of his penis and he knew it was only sheer will that kept him from climaxing.

  Ashley fumbled with the condom pack and finally got it open. Another wave of electricity shot through her. Her eyes rolled.

  Elliot came up on his knees and moved between her parted thighs, keeping his fingers in place. He was rock hard and at full attention.

  Ashley rolled the condom over the head and down as far as it would go, which was only halfway.

  With his free hand, Elliot pulled her bra down beneath her breasts forcing them higher. Her nipples were hard and full, calling for his attention. He lowered his head and drew the dark grape into his eager mouth and he pushed deep and hard inside her in one swift move.

  A whoosh of air expelled from her lungs as her insides instinctively gripped him, the muscles opening and closing around him.

  “Ahhhh,” he groaned, moving in long, slow strokes willing himself to extend the incredible feeling that rocked them both. He draped her legs over his arms and pushed them back and as far as her body would allow and sunk into the depths of her essence, tapped the spot, once, twice, three times and then heaven and earth collided.

  Ashley’s entire body undulated in wave after wave of unspeakable explosions, as Elliot rode out his own fantasy, his longings, his wants and needs and finally they merged into one long jet stream of release that erupted within her.

  For several joyous moments they bathed in the afterglow, entwined, joined. The rush of their breathing, the pounding of their hearts were the only sounds in the room. By degrees their breathing and racing hearts slowed to normal.

  Elliot kissed her along the ridge of her collarbone, making her squirm. “Hate me yet?” he asked, thrusting gently into her as he felt himself growing hard again.

  “Not quite,” she said, feeling his swelling begin to fill her. She rolled her hips. “Maybe we…need to…finish working out…our aggressions,” she said, halting between her words with each of his thrusts.

  Elliot suddenly turned onto his back and took her with him, his thoroughly engorged penis binding them together. “Why don’t you show me how aggressive you can be,” he challenged. He reached up and cupped her breasts in his hands and gently massaged them, teasing the sensitized nipples between the tips of his fingers.

  Ashley arched her back and braced her hands behind her on his muscled thighs. She milked him in a mind-blowing climax with quick up and down thrusts of her hips and the deep squeeze of her inner muscles that had them both seeing stars.

  Later they lay side by side, the cool sheet covering their damp bodies to the waist. Ashley’s insides still quivered and periodically Elliot’s shaft jumped. But they both knew that enough was enough for one night.

  “Since this is your room, I don’t expect that you’ll be getting up and leaving in the middle of the night,” Ashley said, half in jest.

  “I don’t plan to.” He paused a moment. “And I’m asking you to stay. If you want to.”

  She turned halfway toward him. “You mean that.”

  “Yeah,” he said after several beats. “I mean it.”

  “I want to,” she whispered.

  They were quiet for a while, absorbing the reality behind what had just been said between them.

  Ashley tilted her head to press against Elliot’s shoulder. Elliot slid his arm beneath her and drew her close to him and he felt warm inside, something he hadn’t felt in longer than he cared to remember. It was a comforting sensation, like everything was going to be okay.

  “This isn’t going to be easy,” she said softly, thinking about the enormity of stepping out in the ocean of a relationship with Elliot Morgan.

  Elliot exhaled slowly. “It never is.”

  She angled her head toward him. “You sound like you have experience,” she said, trying to sound light against his suddenly somber tone.

  Several moments passed and with each ticking second, Ashley felt the panic rise as if waiting for an impending explosion any minute. And it did.

  “Her name was Lynn,” he said quietly.

  Ashley’s heart thumped. She didn’t move.

  “We met about eight years ago during training.” Slowly he told her bits and pieces about his and Lynn’s relationship, how they’d gotten together and how he’d lost her.

  Listening to him tell her about another woman was difficult to hear, but it explained so much about who Elliot Morgan was and why he lived his life the way he did. This compounded with Bernard’s revelations told Elliot’s painful story. She understood all too well about loss and the devastating aftereffects it could have. She snuggled closer to him, listened to his heart. Maybe they weren’t so completely different after all.

  Chapter 14

  The following morning they sat down at the kitchen table together aft
er having prepared a breakfast fit for a crew of construction workers.

  They’d awakened in a tangle of limbs and twisted sheets. Ashley’s leg was draped across Elliot’s hip, his large hand was clamped securely around her plump bottom. They made slow and easy love, taking their time as if waking in each other’s arms was an everyday occurrence. The comfort and familiarity made the experience that much more enjoyable.

  After a long, hot, sudsy shower, they both agreed that they were starving and pretty much fixed everything available from omelets to pancakes, turkey sausage, grits with cheese, wheat toast and fruit.

  Elliot finished off his second plate and pushed it to the side. “Can’t take another bite.” He rubbed his stomach.

  Ashley grinned. “I was beginning to think you had a bottomless pit down there instead of a stomach.”

  “Trust me, that’s what it felt like.” He looked across the table at her and his eyes darkened. “You drained me of all my essence, woman. I had to replenish, build my stamina back up.”

  “Oh, sure, blame it on the new girl,” she joked while she collected the dishes, scraped them and loaded them into the dishwasher.

  “I never did get around to checking the surveillance. Seems like the new girl got all of my attention.”

  “If you ask me, you get distracted much too easy,” she said, sashaying past him.

  He reached out, grabbed her around her waist and deposited her on his lap amidst a fit of giggles.

  “A man is entitled to his distractions,” he said cupping her chin and stealing a kiss. “As a matter of fact I feel a distraction coming on now.”

  Ashley pressed her palms against his chest. “We have a busy day. You have surveillance to check and I have to go to work. I do have a job you know,” she added, teasing his lips with flirty kisses.

  “It won’t take long,” he said into the soft hollow of her neck.

  Ashley arched her head back to look at him. Her skin began to tingle.

  Elliot tugged on his bottom lip with his teeth as he watched indecision transform into action. Ashley reached between them and tugged on the loose knot of the belt on her robe. The soft sea-foam-colored terry robe fell open allowing him to feast on her beauty.