Mine Until Morning

by Samantha Hunter

  “Don’t let him get away this time.”

  12

  1:00 p.m. (24 hours later)

  JONAS TURNED AS the door to the back room of the office opened, and he saw Garrett approach where the brothers had congregated to catch up.

  “Lunch,” he said approvingly as the aroma of food permeated the space. His sense of smell was still serving him well, but he was hungry for everything he could see, which, granted, at this point, wasn’t much. Mostly blurry blobs moving around, shadows and shapes, but he absorbed every nuance completely, eager for his full range of vision to return.

  Matt said he should be back to his full eyesight within a week, but that he might need some glasses, depending on how well his vision recovered. Jonas was fine with that. Anything was better than the complete darkness he’d been living in.

  “Chinese. I didn’t get breakfast, and I’m starving.”

  Several minutes later, as they consumed the food with no small bit of teasing about Jonas missing his target as he tried to eat the noodles and chunks of meat in the lo mein he loved—he felt more renewed and ready to dig in again. Irish purred profusely on the floor next to where Jonas sat, content to have all of them there, and happy with whatever chunks of food were being offered.

  “Irish really likes that pork lo mein,” Ely observed.

  “He has good taste.”

  “Anyone know where Ely took off to?” Jonas asked, reaching down to scratch the cat behind the ears, rewarded with even louder purring.

  “Any egg rolls left?” he asked.

  “Let me get that for you,” Chance said matter-of-factly, putting an egg roll into his hand. “He took off with the tattooed chick, Tessa’s friend.”

  “Lydia?” Jonas said, surprised.

  “They were heading to the hospital cafeteria, but that was the last I saw of them. Maybe Ely got lucky,” Chance said, and Jonas could almost see his younger brother’s grin.

  Jonas wasn’t completely happy to hear that.

  “Lydia’s a friend,” he said, sending his brother a look. “She doesn’t deserve to be Ely’s rebound lay,” he muttered, hoping that wasn’t what his brother was doing.

  It didn’t seem possible. Lydia and Ely were about as different as he could imagine.

  “Rebound?” Chance asked. “What did I miss?”

  Ely had told Garrett and Jonas in the hosptial about the encounter with Chloe. Jonas had wanted to talk about anything other than his own issues, and noticed right away that his younger brother was out of sorts.

  “She was getting married?” Chance said, clearly outraged. “That sucks.”

  “Yeah.”

  “How about you, Gar? You never said how your night went last night,” Jonas prompted.

  “I helped Mel with her flooding, and then I went home. Nothing to tell,” his older brother reported. “It seems like you guys were getting into enough hot water for all of us combined.”

  “That’s too bad. I like Melissa. She’s had a thing for you for a while.”

  “She’s just a friend. And I’m not interested in going there,” Garrett said in the older-brother voice he used when he was telling his brothers to back off.

  “It’s been three years now, Gar,” Jonas said gently.

  “I know how long it’s been, Jon. Eat your lunch.”

  Jonas nodded. He wasn’t in the habit of poking at his brother’s wounds, but maybe his own feelings about Tessa had him wondering whether any of them would find happiness in love.

  He ached, and set down the egg roll that Chance had given him, suddenly not hungry at all.

  “You okay?” Garrett asked.

  “Yeah. Tired.”

  “And you miss her.”

  “Yeah.”

  “You could call. Go to her,” Garrett suggested.

  Jonas shook his head. “No. It has to be on her terms, what she wants, even if it’s to be left alone. I really screwed it up the first time, so I’m just going to have to wait.”

  He was hurting, missing her more than he had ever missed anything, including his vision. But he meant what he said. It had to be up to her.

  It did feel good to talk about it with his brothers, though. One thing he had learned with Tessa, and from being blind, was that he didn’t need to do it all on his own. Part of that was probably because he knew now that his sight was returning, but also because accepting help in general was suddenly not such a huge deal. It cemented his connections with others, and he’d never really thought about it that way before.

  The defensiveness he’d felt for the last month seemed to go away, and it was a relief. He felt stronger for having shared his problems with his brothers—and for his time with Tessa—not weaker.

  “Well, maybe you won’t have to wait as long as you think,” Garrett said while unwrapping a fortune cookie.

  Jonas took a bite of his egg roll, and chewed thoughtfully. “I’ll wait as long as it takes.”

  “I’m glad to hear that,” someone said behind him, and he immediately knew it was Tessa’s voice.

  He heard his brother chuckle. Garrett had known she was there.

  “Tessa?”

  “Yes,” she said.

  He felt her hand on his shoulder, and he reached up, covering it with his own.

  “How long have you been there?”

  “Long enough,” she said, and he could hear the tears in her voice. “Thank you,” she whispered, leaning down to plant a kiss on his cheek.

  It was all Jonas could do not to pull her down into his arms, and not let go. But he let her set the lead.

  “For what?”

  “For understanding,” she said simply.

  Jonas was silent with surprise. A part of him was sure she’d never come back, never forgive him. He tightened his grips on her hand, to make sure she was really there.

  “Here, have a seat,” Chance said at the same time Jonas heard Garrett offering his chair, too, and the guys scrambled around him as they all tried to make Tessa welcome and comfortable.

  Jonas smiled, and heard Tessa chuckling and thanking them as she took a seat beside Jonas, her hand still wrapped in his.

  “I’m sorry about this morning. The note, scaring you. I wish it had gone down differently,” he said.

  “No, that’s the point, Jonas. I’m so tired of everyone trying to protect me from everything,” she said, tilting her forehead against his. “I know it’s your job, and your nature, to do that, but I don’t want you, my father, or anyone protecting me when it means not being honest or letting me know what’s going on in your head, or your heart.”

  Before he could say anything else, his brothers, as if coordinated ahead of time, rose and briskly left the room.

  “There’s one thing you’re missing.”

  “What’s that?” she asked.

  “I did want to tell you, and I should have. About my blindness, the job—but I was afraid. It wasn’t as much about protecting you as protecting myself,” he said with no small amount of self-disgust.

  “How so?”

  “Howie’s threats were an issue, but it was easier to use them as an excuse and to pretend it was all your fault than to face you and have you see me as…diminished, I suppose.”

  “You thought the loss of your vision would matter to me?” she said in surprise. “How could you think that?”

  “Because I felt that way about myself, not just because I was blind, but because I had let the attacker get the upper hand, had failed to protect you…I don’t know, it all wrapped up together in some way in my head. And then, when your dad offered me a chance to be with you again, I took it, but the lie ate at me. I knew it was wrong, but I did it anyway, because I knew when you found out, you’d be gone.”

  “So instead, you decided to leave first?”

  “I thought I could try to find a way to make things right.”

  “You’re doing that right now. But I was part of this, too,” she said. “I saw what I wanted to see, followed my own selfish desires—
”

  “I love your selfish desires,” he said.

  “You know what I mean. We have a lot of time to make up for…just getting to know each other. Really know each other. I want to know everything about you.”

  He definitely loved her, and leaned in, toward her scent.

  “I can’t believe you’re here,” he said, sliding a hand up into her hair, pulling her in for a kiss, feeling as if it had been days, weeks, instead of just a few hours.

  Her hands framed his face in a tender gesture as she kissed him back, and the mood wasn’t one so much of desire—though he certainly wanted her—as it was of…gratitude.

  And something much, much deeper, he realized.

  “I do love you, Tessa,” Jonas confessed, the words so easy to say it almost surprised him.

  She let out a shaky breath. “That’s all I needed to hear. I love you, too. And we’ll make this all work out, somehow.”

  “What about your father?” he said.

  She laughed. “Jonas, he clearly likes the idea of you with me, so no worries there. I like that idea, too,” she said. “But I’ll talk with him, too. Maybe this can be a fresh start for me and him. His heart was in the right place, and maybe it always has been, but I was too defensive to see it.”

  “I know that feeling,” he murmured against her throat, suddenly wishing they were alone, not here with his brothers nearby.

  Where he had ever gotten the idea that she needed his protection in the first place now mystified him. She’d taken out the attacker in her apartment, and she’d taken on her father, and him. She’d been strong enough to tell them to leave, to stand on her own and still to come back, to forgive.

  Her lips found his again, and it was long, rich moments before either of them spoke again. Jonas saw the shape of the window behind her, and lifted his hand to follow the shadowed contour of her head.

  Soon, though hardly soon enough, he’d be able to see her again, fully and clearly, but until then, he was more than happy to use his hands, and all his senses, to compensate for what his eyes missed.

  ELY OPENED HIS EYES, not quite sure what he was looking at as he stared upward at the brick red ceiling. He’d been in so many places over the last week, he’d lost track.

  Red satin sheets rubbed against his naked skin, and then he remembered.

  Lydia.

  Pushing up on the bed, he heard voices sounding as if they were coming from the floor below, and it came back to him.

  Going without any sleep for forty-eight hours had finally caught up with him, and he’d completely passed out—after discovering that Lydia did, indeed, have tattoos in places where only lovers could see.

  They’d ended up going for a drink instead of for coffee. A couple of drinks, actually. Not smart when he was already tired, but he was sick of worrying about it. He’d been raw inside from seeing Chloe, and even told Lydia the whole sordid story.

  She’d taken him by the hand, took him home. Undressed him.

  Told him it was just for the moment.

  He’d needed…something. Someone to wash away Chloe’s touch, and Lydia had done a fine and thorough job of that. She was the complete opposite of Chloe in every way, and that was what he’d needed.

  He rubbed his wrists, noting a few bruises.

  Right. The handcuffs.

  Sliding off the side of the bed, he looked around, noting how her bedroom reflected the woman. Leather clothing hung over a chair, and an assortment of S and M paraphernalia adorned the walls.

  He pushed past the black lace curtain that surrounded the huge four-poster bed, and took in the classic French boudoir decor mixed with modern-day dungeon.

  It was feminine, sexy and…more than a little kinky. Black and white nudes were framed on the walls, though the faces weren’t visible, and he wondered if it was Lydia in the photos. He looked at them, finding them incredibly erotic, which was probably the point.

  It was all new to him, and suddenly, for all of his experience, he felt completely vanilla, as if there were a whole lot of sexual horizons this Marine had never explored.

  Lydia had helped him see that. Why did he want to get tied down—so to speak—with one person?

  He was an idiot to think he wanted anything long term. He’d seen his brother Garrett suffer a terrible loss, and who knew how things would end up with Jonas. He’d almost lost his sight, and his life, over Tessa.

  And Chloe had proved that his romantic notions were an illusion.

  Lydia seemed to understand that, too. As she said, they only had the moment. It was how he was going to live his life from now on, he thought, hiking up his jeans and slipping his shirt on.

  Walking out into the main room of the apartment, he found nothing like the bedroom. The walls were painted in strong colors, but there weren’t any chains or shackles on the walls. In fact, the place could belong to a librarian, with all the books that lined the walls.

  He heard voices coming from below, where she was probably working. She’d left some doughnuts out on the counter with a carton of orange juice, but he wasn’t hungry. Checking the back, he was happy to find stairs leading down to a rear alley.

  No need to disturb her while she was with a client.

  Finding his way out, Ely put everything from the previous twenty-four hours or so behind him.

  Epilogue

  November, three months later

  “ARE YOU sure you’re okay?” Tessa asked again as Lydia helped her manage her dress.

  “You’re the bride—aren’t I supposed to be asking you that?”

  Tessa laughed, but she wasn’t at all nervous. She’d been so excited to finally be marrying Jonas that she couldn’t wait to walk down the aisle.

  “I know something happened with you and Ely, Lydia. You two avoid each other like the plague. What did he do?”

  Lydia smiled, but didn’t meet Tessa’s eyes.

  “Nothing that I didn’t want him to.” The tone of her voice communicated that she wasn’t going to say more. “You look perfect. I’m not such a fan of white, as you know, but this is one of the prettiest dresses I have ever seen.”

  They were doing everything very traditionally for the wedding—in deference to their parents’ wishes—though it was a small ceremony. Jonas’s parents were wonderful, and she had loved them immediately. Emily Berringer had wasted no time taking Tessa under her wing and helping her make wedding plans, for which Tessa was so grateful. It was overwhelming, in a good way, but she loved the Berringers’ hands-on way of doing everything.

  There would be some media at the event, a few hand-selected reporters and one photographer from the paper that her father had approved. Tessa was okay with it—it was part of being the daughter of a politician.

  The pretty Quaker church that was set among the hills of the Pennsylvania countryside was perfect, their guests few but special to her and Jonas.

  Tessa looked in the mirror, studying the dress. The full-length silk felt wonderful against her skin. It was fitted, strapless, with hundreds of tiny pearls and rhinestones arranged in flowering patterns that caught the light as she moved. The design was in some ways plain, but stunning. She wore only gardenias in her hair, and her bouquet matched the special scent she had created just for the wedding—and the honeymoon.

  She’d blended something special for Jonas, too, a more subtle, masculine scent that would promote stamina, she thought with a smile. He was going to need it. Not that she had any complaints.

  If she thought the sex the night of the blackout had been intense, what they had shared since openly declaring their feelings for each other had been off the charts. She couldn’t wait to see what new levels of pleasure marriage would bring. She knew that all the cynical comments people made about being lifetime partners with someone were wrong, at least for them.

  Far from losing the heat of the initial meeting, everything just got more intense the closer they became, not less so.

  She shifted in the dress, slightly, her nipples beading in
anticipation.

  “Geez, you’re worse than me,” Lydia said, laughing and meeting her eyes in the mirror. “You’re already thinking about the honeymoon, aren’t you?”

  Tessa grinned. “Guilty as charged. I mean, I’m looking forward to this, to marrying Jonas, but the wedding is really for our parents, and everyone else. I just want him.”

  “You two are amazing. You almost make me believe it can happen,” Lydia said. “Though it’s not for me.”

  “It might be, when you meet the right man.”

  “You know my philosophy on that.”

  Tessa did, and it made her a little sad. She hated being one of those brides who went around wanting to see all her friends married, too, but she wanted Lydia to be as happy as she was, someday.

  “Jonas is going to go blind again when he sees you, you’re so gorgeous,” Lydia, her only attendant, said, stepping back.

  “Well, let’s hope not,” Tessa said with a smile. She had some treats planned for Jonas, and he very much needed to be able to see.

  Uncharacteristically sentimental, the women hugged, and Tessa was determined not to cry, or she’d ruin her makeup again for the second time that morning.

  It had been bad enough when Chance, Ely and Garrett had all come to see her and welcome her to the family, each presenting her with a small gift of their own.

  She’d noticed, though, how when Ely came in, Lydia had gone, the two not even sharing a glance.

  “Ready?” Lydia said.

  “So very, very ready,” Tessa replied, taking her flowers and heading out to meet her father, who was giving her away.

  As the music cued, and Tessa saw Jonas at the other end of the aisle, heart-stoppingly handsome in his tux, she swallowed hard.

  Oh, these were the nerves everyone talked about, she thought, freezing for a second.

  But then Jonas smiled, and her father took her arm in his, and everything was okay again.

  Lydia led the way, and took her place on the left side of the judge—a prestigious friend of her father’s—and Garrett stood on the right with his brother.

  She knew this was hard for Gar, her heart breaking. The last wedding he had attended had been his own.