Bad & Bold - A 7 Book Bad Boy Romance Collection!

by Rhodes, Ashley

  Lauren nodded, but her expression was serene. “It was really scary, and it still is. Right now, she’s with me all the time, but there will be a time when she has to go to school and find her own way in life, and I know I’ll worry and fret dreadfully. Still, I can’t imagine life without her, and neither could Patrick. Neither one of us were willing to give up having a family just because he’s in the family.”

  She said it in a meaningful fashion, and it confirmed Tara’s speculation. “I just don’t see how you can have a normal family life with someone who does what our husbands do.” It still felt strange to say the word husband, especially since she had spent more time apart from Alexei that she had spent married to him, now that she had been with the Murphys for five days. She had spent three days as Alexei’s wife. Technically, they were still married, but it was hard to feel that way when she hadn’t seen her husband. Especially when their ceremony had consisted of a simple signing of a certificate with no words of love exchanged.

  “It’s difficult sometimes, but I love him and he loves me. When you get down to it, that’s really the most important thing. The rest of it is just trappings or obstacles, depending on what you’re talking about. You have to decide how much you can accept, and then you have to focus on what you want and try not to be overly fearful of what could happen.” Her lips curved softly into a gentle smile, and she said, “Patrick likes to say plan for the worst and hope for the best. When it comes to being married to a man like ours, that’s really all you can do.”

  Her new friend made it sound so easy, distilled down to one simple sentence on how to live her life. Plan for the worst and hope for the best. That made sense, and perhaps she could embrace the ideals someday, but having her husband far away and with no idea if or when he would send for her, or if he even wanted to try to make their marriage work now that the threat was out of the picture, made it impossible to embrace the principle today.

  It might not have been his intent, but she felt betrayed and abandoned, as though he had dumped her on someone and forgotten about her. She hadn’t been able to glean more than a few barebones details from Patrick Murphy with her incessant questions, so she had no idea exactly what was going on with Alexei, other than he was still alive. Patrick had said he seemed safe, but they hadn’t had direct contact for what he had succinctly summed up as reasons. He was as maddeningly ambiguous and tightlipped as Alexei could be.

  At least her fears of sex slavery had been unfounded, and she almost snorted aloud when she remembered that silly thought. It hadn’t taken five minutes seeing him in the presence of his wife to realize no other woman in the world existed for Patrick Murphy besides Lauren. She was his entire world, and Maddie was the center of both of their existences. He seemed like a tender and loving family man, so it was difficult to reconcile that he headed up a criminal empire when he wasn’t with his wife and child.

  It was the same with Alexei though. When she was in his arms or his presence, it was a lot easier to forget what he did for a living, to ignore her disapproval of his criminal activities and to forget he could be a ruthless murderer, even though she’d seen that with her own eyes. On the other hand, she was obviously a murderer too, though she considered it more self-defense than anything.

  She hadn’t been just defending herself, for that matter. Alexei’s life had seemed at risk, and it was possible Vasile’s grudge might have extended to Tonya after he did away with Tara. She wasn’t sorry she had shot the other man, but she still experienced nightmares and sometimes woke with a scream trapped in her throat as the memory of the encounter played through her mind night after night.

  She wasn’t sleeping well, and she knew she had lost a few pounds just in the five days she had been there, because it was difficult to focus on anything besides her misery. It wasn’t guilt that brought on the nightmares, and she was surprisingly at peace with her decision to kill Vasile, so she wished the nightmares would just go away.

  During the day, they didn’t plague her, and she wasn’t crippled with doubt or brought to her knees by random memories of the moment assailing her. It was only at night, as she lay alone in the large bed provided by the Murphy family, that the thoughts weighed her down, following her into sleep and haunting her dreams. She sensed all she needed was Alexei’s arms to hold them at bay and banish them forever, but until she was back with him, the nightmares would haunt her.

  “What if he’s forgotten about me?” She hated how weak and vulnerable her voice was when she uttered the question, and she hated feeling gutted by the notion of losing Alexei. Their relationship was strange and dark, but somehow, she had grown to love him, and she wanted nothing more than to have him walk through the door and take her home. But as the hours passed, and the days ticked by, that seemed less likely all the time.

  ***

  Alexei stared at his guests across the desk, keeping his expression polite but guarded. Vadim was a person he’d never wanted in his home again, but when the other man had come in the company of Igor Leshenko, the Sovietnik from Moscow, he couldn’t refuse him entry. Now, he sat stiffly, waiting to see what they wanted. This wasn’t his first interview with Leshenko, and he had thought the other man had accepted his accounting of the events well enough.

  Leshenko had certainly had his men crawling over the estate for several days, digging into everything, including Alexei’s computer files and financial documents. Alexei had maintained an air of cooperation the entire time, pretending he shared their concern for the location of his missing uncle.

  It had been a relief when two days ago, hikers had discovered the car over the cliff, and rescue workers and recovery teams had moved in. There had been a news story about it, and he had immediately known it was Vasile’s car, of course, but he hadn’t been able to tell anyone that. It had been several hours later when Leshenko had come to his house to share the bad news.

  Alexei had taken the supposed shock of his uncle’s car accident well, even managing to ask if Leshenko suspected someone had been involved in the accident. His answer had been relatively reassuring.

  “Of course there’s always the possibility,” he’d said, “But a contact at the morgue didn’t see any sign of foul play. It appears it was simply an accident. Such a tragic loss to the family.”

  Alexei had nodded, knowing the man referred both to his immediate family and to the vory at large. From his perspective, it was no loss at all, but he couldn’t very well admit that. With surprising tact, the other man had left him to grieve shortly thereafter, not returning until this afternoon.

  “How can I help you, Igor?” He didn’t bother addressing Vadim, or even do more than glance in the other man’s direction.

  “We conducted our own investigation, and we’ve concluded your uncle was definitely in a car accident. We still aren’t certain why he was in that area, but there appears to have been no one else involved, and there are no skidmarks to suggest he was run off the road.”

  Alexeia exhaled, not having to fake his relief, though for different reasons than the one he stated. “I’m glad to hear no one was trying to kill him, though of course it’s terrible that he’s gone.”

  Igor nodded. “It leaves an opening on the East Coast, Alexei. I’m going to need someone heading up Brighton Beach.”

  Alexei braced himself for the offer, searching a way to tactfully decline. The last thing he wanted to do was move into the nest of vipers in Brighton Beach, even ostensibly as their Pakhan. Fortunately, or unfortunately since he and Vadim did not get along, Igor’s next words removed the need to be diplomatic.

  “My nephew Sevastyan, the current Sovietnik, will take over Vasile’s position, and Vadim will be moving to Brighton Beach to act as Sovietnik. It appears your uncle had already promoted you to the Pakhan of your city, so I don’t intend to make any changes there. You’ve been a good and loyal follower, and full authority of the city rests with you.”

  Alexei nodded, keeping his expression neutral even as joy surged through him. Finally
, he officially had the power to make the changes he wanted. Human cargo would no longer move through their city, at least not through the Russians, though he couldn’t stop the Italians. Yet.

  Perhaps he could even find a way to curb some of the drug trade as they switched their focus to money laundering. If it proved successful for them, perhaps other branches of the bratva in other cities and countries would adopt their model. He wasn’t optimistic about that, but he reminded himself that he could only change so much, and now he had the power to do something.

  It didn’t sit well with him that Vadim would technically be higher than him, but it would take a lot for the Sovietnik of a different branch to overrule him as Pakhan. At best, he would never see Vadim again, though he wasn’t that optimistic. “Thank you, Igor.” He extended his hand to shake the other man’s. “I appreciate you coming from Moscow to thoroughly investigate my uncle’s disappearance too and ensure no one murdered him.”

  Igor nodded. “Of course. Vasile was one of us.”

  “Now what will you do, Igor?”

  Igor looked happy for a moment. “I’ll return to Moscow and my life there. I’ll be glad to leave this business and this country behind me.” He shuddered slightly. “I don’t know how you both stand it here. America is nothing like Russia.”

  Alexei nodded, but didn’t share that he considered that a plus rather than a minus. When he had still lived in Russia, they had been bratva, with power and money, but there had been many people around them who’d had nothing. As a young and self-centered Boevik under his father, he hadn’t paid much attention to the suffering, but now he remembered it sharply and was glad to be far away from there. It also didn’t hurt that his bride was an American, and he never would have met her if he hadn’t been here.

  As soon as Leshenko and Vadim departed, he was on his feet and moving out of his study, calling Yuri as he went. Finally, he could bring his wife home.

  It was only as he slid into the limousine that Alexei remembered the decision he had arrived at a few nights before. He wanted Tara home at his side. It was where she belonged, but it had to be her choice.

  There was no longer any reason to have to keep her captive, and he owed it to her to allow her to make the decision for herself. If she chose him, it would make the relationship that much stronger anyway. He refused to think what he would do if she didn’t choose him. He would have to let her go, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t set about changing her mind.

  ***

  Tara rushed out of the Murphy mansion and down the marble steps as the limousine crested the hill. Patrick had told her less than a minute ago that Alexei was arriving, and here she was running to greet him. She didn’t care if it made her look like a pathetic puppy. She couldn’t stand to be away from her husband a moment longer.

  As soon as the car stopped, she opened the car door before either Alexei or the driver could. Tara didn’t wait for him to get out. She simply climbed over his lap, closing the door behind her as she went. She sat on the seat beside him, suddenly feeling nervous and a bit shy in spite of her enthusiasm. “Hi.” That was it? After six days, that was all she had? She shook her head at her own lack of articulation.

  His lips twitched, and he echoed her greeting with a hint of teasing. “Hi.”

  She clasped her hands in her lap. “Is it over? Am I safe now?”

  Alexei nodded. “You don’t need the details, but suffice to say they believe Vasile was in a car accident. No one knows you shot him.”

  Relief rushed through her, but she couldn’t help saying, “I didn’t really have a choice about shooting him, you know? Are you angry that I did?”

  Alexei’s eyes widened, and he burst into laughter. “Angry? No, of course not, lisichka. I’m proud and amazed, but I’m certainly not angry. You probably remained unaware, but I had a gun on my lap and was preparing to do the same thing a second after you shot him. You simply beat me to it.”

  She sighed with relief, her eyes closing as she dragged in a harsh inhalation that threatened to turn to a sob when she exhaled. “If you aren’t angry, why did you send me away?”

  He said something in Russian she didn’t understand, but it sounded gentle. She opened her eyes just as he lifted her onto his lap, his knuckles brushing against her cheek to wipe away the stray tear that had escaped.

  “I didn’t send you away, Tara. I simply sent you to safety for a few days. I knew bratva would be crawling through the area in search of him once they realized he was missing. I didn’t know they would send someone from Russia, but they did. I didn’t want you exposed all those vory, simply because you’re better than that, but also because I didn’t want anyone to suspect you had something to do with Vasile’s death. Patrick kindly offered to allow you to stay for a few days until everything died down and they all went home.”

  Her heart lifted at his words, and she bent her head to kiss him. She was surprised when he put up a hand between them, his fingers brushing her lips, but his hand providing enough force to keep her from bending forward. “What…?”

  “I want to take you home with me, Tara.” She started to nod, but he ignored her sign of affirmation. “However, it has to be your choice. You’re no longer a risk to me. I know you would never testify against me, but I have something on you now too. In the world I live in, we hold each other over the same barrel, so to speak, so there’s no reason to keep you my captive.”

  She frowned, confusion whirling through her. Her heart had jumped at the idea of returning home with him, but now he seemed reluctant to take her with him. “I don’t understand what you want, Alexei.” Lyosha seemed too intimate in the moment, with the uncertainty between them.

  He wore a sad expression. “It’s not what I want, lisichka, but what you want this time. I’m offering you the choice of going home and forgetting about this, of returning to the life you had before, where you’re safe. If you choose to come with me, you’re choosing everything. I won’t be leaving the bratva, and we’ll never have a typical life. There will always be danger to you and to me, and even danger to any children we might have. It’s a fact of our life. Before, I was prepared to force you to accept all that just to be able to keep you, but now…”

  Her lips trembled, and she forced back the reaction, drawing on a reserve of inner strength. “Now you can change your mind and don’t want me anymore?” she supplied for him in a tone that was almost lighthearted, and almost hid the pain underscoring her words. Almost.

  Alexei shook his head, and his hands tightened on her hips. “I’ve never changed my mind, Tara. I want to keep you forever, to make you my wife in every sense of the word, including a ridiculous ceremony packed with people we barely. I want to give you everything, and that everything includes the ability to choose. Until now, that’s one thing you haven’t had from the night I first took you. I’m simply giving you back the power to decide what you do with your life. I hope it will include me, but it isn’t right not to let you pick for yourself.”

  Tears burned her eyes again, and she blinked heavily to keep them in check. This time, they were one hundred percent happy tears, with no sadness or ambiguity. “I don’t know how it happened, Alexei, but my heart chose you a long time ago. I appreciate the gesture, and I’m thrilled to know that I have autonomy restored, but if it really is my choice, then I choose for you to take me home.”

  His expression was tense, and he seemed partially confused. “Your home or my home, lisichka?”

  She smiled at him as she burrowed closer, bridging the gap between them now that his hand had dropped to her hips. “Our home, Alexei. Take me home, and then just take me.”

  They moved together simultaneously into a deep kiss, his mouth ravaging hers as they learned the taste of each other all over again. It had only been six days, but it felt like six years to her, and sitting on his lap, her mouth pressed against his, was like coming home again.

  He lifted his head. “To hell with waiting until we get home for that.” He took a moment to spea
k into the intercom, relaying directions to the driver to return them to his home.

  Tara thought briefly about returning to the Murphy household long enough to thank them for their hospitality and let them know she was going home, but she knew Lauren would understand why she had left so abruptly. Later, much later, she would connect with her new friend again and thank her for everything. She hoped Lauren would continue to be part of her life, but right now, her thoughts were too consumed with being near her husband to be concerned about manners.

  As they pulled away from the Murphy household, she was already stripped below the waist and in the process of taking off her shirt. Alexei wriggled around on the seat to slide down his slacks, letting them pool at his feet, clearly too impatient to remove more than that.

  She was already dripping for him, feeling like she had been waiting forever. Just being near him was enough to make her wet and prepared for his cock, and she sank onto him with no resistance despite a lack of foreplay, other than their kiss.

  As she rode him, moving slowly and gently to prolong their connection and enjoy the simple pleasure of just touching him, their gazes locked, and she stared deeply into his eyes. She was certain she recognized the emotion there and was just as certain it was reflected in her own gaze.

  Apparently, Alexei wanted to ensure she had no doubt. “I love you, lisichka.”

  She flexed her in her muscles around him as she sped up her pace, digging her nails into his shoulders as she clung to him. “I love you too, my big bad vohlk.”

  ******

  Other Stories Available in This Mafia Universe

  Shane: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B015C74KME

  Cormac: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B015C8H0WU

  Patrick: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B015VE6JDG

  Click on the links to buy or borrow for free with Kindle Unlimited.

  About R.E. Saxton