A Nurse and a Pup to Heal Him
Page 11
‘Me, too.’ He kissed her softly. ‘Can I see you tomorrow?’
‘I’d like that.’
‘Let’s go somewhere we can take Archie,’ he said.
‘That’d be brilliant.’ She paused. ‘Um—I...’
‘It’s our first official date,’ he said, ‘so I’m just going to kiss you goodnight.’
She stole a kiss. ‘I like your old-fashioned courtesy. Even though it kind of makes our relationship the wrong way round.’
‘Spending the night together before we started dating?’ he asked.
She groaned. ‘Does that make me a bit of a tart?’
He wrapped his arms around her. ‘No. You’re lovely. But I want to do this properly now. I want us to get to know each other better before we go to bed together again.’
‘To be sure we’re doing the right thing?’ At his nod, she said, ‘Me, too.’ She kissed him. ‘See you tomorrow. I’ll have a think about where we can go.’
* * *
In the end, they took a picnic and went further down the coast to Brancaster.
‘It’s like Great Crowmell in that the tide comes in really quickly, and a few people have been stranded while they were exploring the wreck,’ she told him. ‘But as long as we keep an eye on the sea, we’ll be fine.’
The beach stretched for miles, and Ben really enjoyed walking hand in hand with Toni, barefoot in the warm shallow water, with the dog splashing about in front of them.
There was something magical about the place, with the bright blue sky contrasting sharply with the pale golden sand, and the light of the sun on the waves lapping against the shoreline looked almost like fairy dust.
After Karen had left, Ben had been so sure he’d never get involved with anyone, let alone fall in love. But here, on the gentle East Anglian coast, he felt different—because Toni was beside him. Right now, the world felt filled with brightness and hope, an adventure to revel in.
And every moment of the day felt special—everything from the warmth and brightness in Toni’s grey eyes, through to the fun of finding pretty shells on the beach, buying ice creams from the kiosk by the car park and sharing a picnic on the dunes. Ben couldn’t remember when he’d last felt this carefree—this happy.
When the tide started to come in, they headed back to the car.
‘I’ve had such a great day,’ he said. ‘And I know it’s selfish of me, but I’m not ready for it to end just yet.’
‘Me neither,’ she admitted.
When she met his gaze, it felt as if his heart had exploded
‘Toni.’ He stroked her face, then rubbed the pad of his thumb along her lower lip. She caught his thumb gently between her teeth, and his pulse kicked up a notch. He leaned forward and kissed her, and it felt as if fireworks were going off around him, massive starbursts full of joy.
When he broke the kiss, he was trembling. And so was she.
‘I want to show you something,’ she said.
He nodded, and she drove them further up the coast.
The sun was starting to slip down the sky.
‘I thought this was the east coast so you’d see the sun rise over the sea?’ Ben said.
‘This is the only west-facing beach in Norfolk. The sunsets here are amazing,’ Toni said. ‘Stacey and I used to love it when Gran took us here. I wanted to share it with you.’
They found a space on a bench on the cliff top and watched the sun slide lower. The huge red ball cast a plume of red light across the silvery blue sea, and Ben slid his arm around Toni, with Archie curled by their feet.
‘I used to like watching the sunset from Primrose Hill when I was in London,’ Ben said. ‘You had the whole city spread out in front of you with all the amazing colours in the sky. But this is amazing.’ It wasn’t just the romance of the sunset, though. She made him feel amazing.
‘Do you miss London?’ she asked.
‘I grew up there, so I do miss it a bit,’ he admitted. ‘But I’m coming to love Great Crowmell. The people, the place, and it’s wonderful to live so near to the sea.’ He looked at her. ‘My sister’s coming to visit, the weekend after next.’
‘Uh-huh.’
‘I was wondering if maybe you’d like to meet her.’
Her eyes were very clear. ‘As your colleague?’
‘Or as my girlfriend.’ The words were out before he could stop them.
Her eyes widened. ‘So we’d be official.’
This was it. The moment to prove to himself that he could move on, ‘Official,’ he said.
And her answering smile made the world feel full of wonder.
CHAPTER EIGHT
MONDAY WAS HARD for Toni, walking into a building full of memories.
Ben sent her a text at lunchtime.
Thinking of you this afternoon. Here if you need me.
Toni had no intention of calling him, knowing that he would be busy seeing patients; but she really appreciated his support.
When she arrived, everyone at The Beeches was subdued, and even Archie couldn’t get a smile out of Julia.
‘Days like these, I hate my job,’ Julia said.
‘Hey,’ Toni said, giving her a hug. ‘You’ve made a real difference to the residents’ lives. You’ve got nothing to reproach yourself for.’
‘And death goes with the territory, I know. It’s like when you work in the emergency department and you know you can’t save everyone, no matter how hard you work and how much effort you put in.’
‘I brought you these from my garden,’ Toni said, handing her a bunch of golden roses. ‘These were Gran’s favourite. And they smell amazing.’
‘Bless you. Sunshine in a vase,’ Julia said.
The residents were all talking about Ginny, all missing her; though petting Archie seemed to help some of them relax a bit more. After her therapy dog session at the nursing home, Toni took Archie for a run on the beach before heading back to her house, needing the endorphins to lift her mood. Ben had left her a second text.
Hope things were bearable. Let me know when you want me to pick you up. Dinner at a dog-friendly pub or I’ll cook for you.
She called him. ‘Hi. I’m home.’
‘How are you doing?’ he asked.
‘A little bit sad,’ she admitted. ‘Julia gave me a photograph that one of the staff had taken of Ginny with Archie, a few months back.’
‘That’s nice. Something to hold onto—good memories,’ he said. ‘When do you want me to pick you up?’
‘To be honest, I don’t really want to go anywhere,’ she said. ‘I’m not quite in the mood for socialising.’
‘Then I’ll bring dinner to you, if you don’t mind me taking over your kitchen. Half an hour?’ he suggested.
‘That’d be nice,’ she said.
She splashed her face with water. Ben was so much more thoughtful than any of her exes had been. Sean couldn’t cook, so he would’ve demanded to go out for dinner—and he would’ve sulked at her refusal. Ben completely understood how she felt and he’d come up with a perfect compromise.
Why on earth had Ben’s ex fallen for someone else? Toni wondered. She couldn’t understand it. If he had some deep character flaw, it would’ve shown up by now. Even the most practised charmer couldn’t keep up the pretence all the time, and Ben wasn’t a charmer. He was genuine.
He turned up with an armful of sweet-scented stocks. ‘It’s a kind of cheer-you-up thing,’ he explained.
‘Thank you. They’re my favourites. I love the scent.’
‘I’m glad you like them.’ He gave her the cheekiest wink. ‘I thought the in-your-face pink ones would be perfect for you.’
‘Because I’m loud?’
‘Because you’re bright and lovely,’ he corrected, and kissed her lightly. ‘Right. Dinner is in ten minutes.’
‘Ser
iously? What did you do, buy fresh pasta and a jar of sauce?’
‘Yes to the fresh pasta,’ he said, ‘and it’s from the deli, so I know it’s the good stuff. No to the sauce. By the time you’ve got those flowers in water, dinner will be almost done.’
‘Can I do anything to help?’
‘Put the salad into a bowl,’ he said.
By the time she’d arranged the stocks in a vase, and shaken the bag of salad leaves and the tomatoes into bowls, dinner was ready.
‘It smells amazing,’ she said.
‘Scallops and linguini in garlic and lemon sauce,’ he said. ‘A nice recipe for our diabetics, if you take out the Parmesan.’
She tasted a forkful. ‘You could’ve been a chef. I think you’d give the posh Michelin-starred place at Little Crowmell a run for its money.’
‘Thank you. I’ve just always liked cooking,’ he said. ‘It relaxes me. I’m planning a barbecue for when my sister and her family come to stay.’
‘I’ll make pudding,’ she said. ‘What do they all like?’
‘I do know Jessie will do anything for cheesecake.’
‘That’s easy, then,’ she said.
‘And bring Archie with you,’ he said casually.
‘Really? Would that be OK with your landlord? Because you could always have your barbecue here if it would be easier.’
‘Unless Archie is going to dig a massive hole in the lawn or chew a chair leg, my landlord will be fine about him visiting,’ he said.
She grinned. ‘Then I’ll bring a tennis ball and a chew with us. He’ll be on his best behaviour—and so will I.’
‘Good.’
‘I really appreciate what you’ve done for me tonight,’ she said. ‘You’ve made a horrible day so much better.’
‘You’re my girlfriend,’ he said softly. ‘Of course I’ll be there to support you.’
Maybe she’d actually found Mr Right this time, Toni thought. Someone who made her pulse beat faster but who wouldn’t make her miserable.
He didn’t stay that night, but they managed to sneak in another date during the week—a comedy show in a tiny theatre in Norwich where they held hands through the whole show and just laughed for a couple of hours, forgetting their worries, and then back at Toni’s house they sat outside to watch the stars with Archie sprawled at their feet.
‘So you like museums if they’re about science,’ she said.
‘Clocks, space and rocks make my nerdy heart happy,’ he said. ‘I particularly like the display in the Natural History Museum where there’s a massive fulgurite.’
‘Which is, in English?’ she asked.
‘Lightning that has struck the earth through sand and turned it to glass—I guess it’s a kind of fossilised lightning,’ he said.
‘Fossilised lightning? Wow. The best I can offer there is to take you back to the stripy cliffs at Hunstanton to find fossils,’ she said. ‘Or West Runton, where they found a mammoth in the cliff.’
‘You are so on.’ He smiled at her. ‘So what kind of museums do you like?’
‘Textiles,’ she said promptly. ‘I love the V&A. All the pretty dresses. It’s my favourite place in London, and Stacey and I sometimes snatch a day there together.’
‘I should have guessed, given how perfect you looked on the nineteen-forties weekend.’
She could tell by his expression that the compliment was genuine, and it warmed her from the inside out. ‘Thank you.’ She paused. ‘What about nature reserves, that kind of thing?’
‘The nearest I’ve been to that in London is walking in one of the parks or alongside the Regent Canal,’ he admitted.
‘In that case,’ she said, ‘I know exactly where we’re going at the weekend.’ She refused to be drawn on the subject until they’d arrived and she’d actually parked the car—this time without Archie accompanying them.
‘A seal trip?’ he said, seeing the board in the car park.
‘This is one of the best bits of Norfolk,’ she said. ‘It’s the biggest colony of grey seals in England—and at this time of year we might be lucky enough to see some common seal pups.’
‘That’s amazing—I’ve never actually seen seals that close before,’ Ben said when they were on the boat, his eyes wide with wonder. ‘They’re gorgeous. They remind me of Archie, with those big eyes—except his are amber rather than dark brown.’
‘And he’s not quite as big as the grey seals,’ she said with a grin. ‘An adult male could be ten times his weight.’
‘Remind me of that, next time he plonks himself on my lap,’ Ben teased.
He was really relaxed with her dog now, Toni thought. Which was good, because that could’ve been a real sticking point.
But part of her still worried. Her relationships had all collapsed before. What was to say that this one would last? Would she find herself falling in love with Ben, and then he disappeared, like her exes? The fear brought an edge to her delight in their burgeoning relationship, but she couldn’t find the right words to talk about it with him, not without sounding pathetic.
He was right to have insisted on taking a step back from the night when he’d comforted her and stayed. Taking things slowly was a good move. And she could maybe keep a tiny bit of distance between them, protect her heart until they were sure where this was going. Neither of them wanted to face the heartbreak from their past again; and if things went wrong it could make life seriously awkward at work. Even though they were both professional and would always put the needs of the patients first, team meetings would definitely be a source of tension.
So when he kissed her goodbye on her doorstep that night, even though part of her was tempted to ask him to stay, she let him go.
Time. They just needed a little time.
* * *
The following week flew by; and early on Friday evening Ben opened his front door to his sister, brother-in-law, niece and nephew.
‘The sea air definitely agrees with you, Ben,’ Jessie said, hugging him. ‘You look happier than I’ve seen you in years.’
He was—and it was all thanks to Toni. She’d helped him to see the bright side of life again. ‘Yeah, yeah,’ he said. But he was smiling. ‘I’m being lazy and not cooking tonight; I thought we could eat fish and chips on the harbour wall, and then go for a walk by the sea.’
‘After the squash on the tube this week in London,’ Kit said, ‘and the traffic on the M25, that sounds amazing.’
‘Bring your stuff in, and we’ll go. You must be starving,’ Ben said. He showed them to their rooms, then took them down to the harbour. He ended up introducing his family to a dozen or so people while they ate their chips.
‘You’ve really settled in,’ Jessie said approvingly.
‘It’s pretty good here,’ Ben said. ‘I really like my team. We’re having a pot-luck dinner at the head of the practice’s house next weekend.’
‘That sounds like fun. Maybe I should suggest doing something like that with my team at the lab,’ she said thoughtfully.
Jessie, Kit and Kelly all loved the beach; Josh fell asleep in the baby carrier Kit was wearing.
‘Can I come and stay in the summer, Uncle Ben, and can we make a huge sandcastle?’ Kelly asked.
‘And collect shells,’ Ben said. ‘We can do that tomorrow morning, too, if you like.’
‘Yay!’ She hugged him. ‘I love you, Uncle Ben. You’re the best uncle in the world.’
‘I love you, too. And you’re the best niece in the world,’ he said. It made Ben feel a pang of guilt that he’d abandoned his niece, too, by letting his own misery get in the way. He needed to make it up to her.
‘I wish you still lived near us in London,’ Kelly said wistfully.
‘I’ve missed you, too, Kelly,’ he said, and hauled her up to sit on his shoulders. ‘But you can all come and see me any time you
like. Plus I can still read you a bedtime story over a video call. We’ll make it a regular thing. Every Monday evening.’
‘I love you,’ she said again.
‘You’re going to meet a very special dog tomorrow. One of the people I work with has a therapy dog who loves reading time, and he’d like to meet you.’
‘Would this dog happen to belong to the nurse practitioner?’ Jessie asked, her tone deceptively mild.
‘My colleague Toni, yes,’ Ben said, trying to keep his voice casual.
‘Hmm,’ Jessie said. ‘Colleague.’
He sighed. ‘All right. She’s my girlfriend, too, but we’re taking things steady and getting to know each other.’
‘I’m glad you’ve moved on,’ she said.
‘I’m in the process of doing that,’ he said softly. ‘There’s still a bit of me that’s scared it could all go wrong. And she’s been hurt in the past, too.’
‘Maybe you’ll be good for each other.’
‘Maybe.’ It was so hard to trust again. To let himself relax and take the risk of falling for Toni. To believe that this time it wouldn’t go wrong.
On Saturday morning, Ben took everyone to the beach again. They made a massive sandcastle, to Kelly’s delight, and collected a pocketful of really pretty shells.
‘I’m going to make a magic mirror,’ Kelly said, ‘and stick the shells around the edge.’
‘Great idea, Kelly,’ he said with a smile.
‘And I’m going to wish—no, I can’t tell you that, or it won’t come true.’
Ben knew what he wished for. But, like his niece, he wasn’t going to tell anyone, because he really wanted it to come true. For him and Toni to be together and have a happy-ever-after. For it to work out this time. For him to be enough for Toni, the way he hadn’t been for Karen.
* * *
Meeting Ben’s sister. Part of Toni was panicking about it. Supposing Ben’s family didn’t like her? Then again, Sean’s family had loved her, and look how badly that had turned out. All she could do was be herself. And she really ought to tell Stacey that she and Ben were more than just friends—though, given the indulgent smile on her sister’s face, Toni had a feeling that Stacey already knew.