Gemma pushed Daisy’s buggy to the lake. Daisy scrambled out and together they began taking bread from the packet, crumbling it between their fingers and throwing it into the water. Daisy squealed in delight as the birds dived for the bread, squawking and squabbling as they pushed each other out of the way.
‘It must be all the best people in the park on a Sunday morning.’
So intent had Gemma become on the task in hand that she jumped when someone spoke at her elbow. Looking up sharply, she found Stephen by her side. The sheer unexpectedness of his presence caused her heart to turn a somersault.
‘Stephen! This is a surprise! ‘ She threw a wild glance at Daisy who was bending over, unashamedly showing the gingham panties that matched her dress as, with Daffy under one arm, she encouraged a moorhen to brave the presence of the other, bigger birds and come forward for his titbits.
‘It seems like we all had the same idea, it being such a lovely day and our day off as well,’ Stephen observed.
‘We come over here quite often…’ Suddenly she was quite at a loss as to what to say. ‘I…I live quite near here…’ She trailed off lamely. Her heart had settled again but it still seemed to be beating much louder and much faster than it usually did.
‘And this is your daughter.’ It was hardly a question, more the statement of an obvious fact.
Gemma took a deep breath. ‘Yes,’ she said at last, ‘this is Daisy.’
At the mention of her name Daisy looked up, first at her mother then at the man who stood by her side. ‘Hello, Daisy.’ Stephen crouched down until his face was on a level with Daisy’s. ‘And who’s this?’ he asked, touching the toy duck under her arm.
‘Daffy,’ Daisy replied, suddenly turning coy and hanging her head in the presence of this stranger.
‘Well, hello, Daffy, I’m very pleased to meet you. I’m Stephen.’
‘Seeven…’ said Daisy looking up at him from beneath her lashes. Turning away, she took more bread from the bag and went back to feeding the ducks.
Stephen watched her for a moment then, rising to his feet again, he half turned to Gemma. ‘She’s beautiful,’ he said quietly, ‘just as I knew she would be, although she’s older than I expected. I imagined a baby.’
Gemma felt as if her legs might be in danger of giving way and was thankful for a bench a few paces behind them. As she sank down Stephen sat beside her, stretching his long legs out in front of him, linking his hands behind his head and lifting his face to the sun. ‘Ah,’ he murmured, ‘this is the life.’
‘You mean it compares favourably with Dubai?’ She’d said it before she could stop herself.
‘Oh, yes,’ he replied. ‘Yes, definitely.’ Then he sighed. ‘Dubai was a means to an end, Gemma. It was never meant to be permanent.’
‘It certainly seemed like it…once,’ she said quietly.
‘It was a golden opportunity,’ he said thoughtfully. ‘But that was all it was—an opportunity which has led to other things. I’m certain it was the experience I’d gained in Dubai that led to my appointment on Bjorn’s team.’
‘So you don’t regret going to Dubai?’ She turned her head and looked at him. He was dressed in jeans and a T-shirt and looked rugged and incredibly handsome with slight stubble on his jaw.
‘Not from a career point of view, no.’ He paused. ‘But personally, I regret that my going brought our relationship to an end. It was never meant to do that, Gemma. If I’d known then that everything was to change…’ He looked at Daisy as he spoke and the little girl looked up at him, giving one of her sunniest smiles. As Stephen smiled in response, Gemma’s heart twisted painfully in her chest.
‘Yes…?’ she said hesitantly at last when it seemed he was still struggling to find the right words. ‘What would you have done?’
‘I doubt very much whether I would have gone,’ he said at last. Then softly, and leaving her slightly shattered by its intensity, he added, ‘Nothing could have justified losing you.’
CHAPTER TEN
GEMMA swallowed and looked away. So why did you go? she wanted to scream at him. Why didn’t you stay? Then you would have known that you’d fathered a child and you would have been here when I gave birth to Daisy.
Almost as if she sensed the anguish of her mother’s thoughts, Daisy turned and toddled to the bench where she thrust her toy duck into Stephen’s hands then began crumbling the remainder of the bread and solemnly sharing it between Gemma, Stephen and Daffy.
‘You’ve scored a hit,’ said Gemma weakly at last as she sought to control her feelings of rage and frustration. ‘It isn’t often that Daisy takes to anyone so quickly. She’s usually shy, especially with men.’
‘She must recognise a friend,’ said Stephen. ‘My two nieces always seem to make a beeline for me as well.’
‘How are your family?’ asked Gemma after a moment.
‘Pretty well.’ Stephen nodded. ‘Dad retired.’
‘I didn’t know that…’ She trailed off. How would she have known? ‘And your mother?’
‘Same as ever.’ He smiled. ‘Still living in hopes of more grandchildren.’ He looked down at Daisy. ‘Does she like the swings? I believe I saw a playground for very young children on my way in.’
‘Yes.’ Gemma forced herself to sound normal. ‘She adores them.’
‘In that case, seeing that the rest of this bread has been reduced to crumbs…’
‘All right.’ Gemma rose to her feet and Daisy looked up expectantly. ‘Time for a swing, Daisy.’ She swept the crumbs onto the ground with one hand and manoeuvred the buggy in the direction of the toddlers’ play area with the other, but when she turned back to take Daisy’s hand it was to find that the little girl had reached up her arms to Stephen.
‘Carry,’ she said. ‘Want carry.’ After only the briefest moment of hesitation Stephen bent down and lifted her up. There was something about the sight of Daisy nestled in Stephen’s arms that stopped Gemma in her tracks. And even as she stared at them, wrestling now with a whole new set of emotions, Daisy wound her little arms around Stephen’s neck and looked intently into his face. He grinned back at her, clearly delighted at the way Daisy was responding to him.
Without a word Gemma led the way to the play area where for the next fifteen minutes or so Daisy insisted that Stephen push her on the swing, Stephen wait for her at the bottom of the slide and Stephen hold her whilst Gemma worked the other end of the see-saw.
When at last Daisy tired of the amusements, Stephen suggested ice cream from the small café. Glancing at Gemma, he added quickly, ‘That is if Mummy says you can.’
‘Yes, all right.’ Gemma couldn’t help but smile. Somehow it seemed inconceivable that she should refuse, that if she did these two would gang up on her and she would find herself doing battle with the pair of them. Together they sat at a table in the shade of a lime tree, and as they ate strawberry ice cream from brightly coloured cardboard tubs, for all the world like any normal family, Gemma gradually felt herself relax.
‘It can’t be easy for you,’ Stephen observed after a while, ‘looking after Daisy and working the hours you do.’
‘I doubt whether I could do it without my mum,’ Gemma replied. ‘She’s great. Daisy goes to a nursery crèche each day and Mum will either take her or pick her up depending on which shift I’m working.’
‘It still can’t be easy. You must get tired.’
‘Don’t all mums?’ she said lightly. ‘I think it comes with the territory.’
‘Even so. Your job is very demanding.’ He hesitated as if unsure of what he was about to say next, then, throwing her a sidelong glance and at the same time taking his last mouthful of ice cream, he said, ‘Before…you were working towards ward sister. Is that still happening?’
Gemma shook her head. ‘No, I had to put my career on hold when I had Daisy.’
Stephen was quiet for a moment. ‘I wish you’d told me, Gemma,’ he said after a while.
‘Told you what?’ She threw him a st
artled glance, wondering exactly what he meant.
‘That you’d had a baby.’
She gave a little shrug. ‘Like I said, Stephen, it was a very difficult time after you left. What with my father dying and everything…and then, well, I guess I just got it into my mind that our relationship was over anyway and then…’
‘Then you met someone else—’
‘I really don’t want to talk about that, Stephen.’
‘OK.’ He shrugged. ‘I can understand that, especially if it didn’t work out. But I suppose the only consolation is that you have Daisy…’ He looked at Daisy sitting next to him at the table as she solemnly spooned ice cream into her mouth. ‘Mind you,’ he went on, ‘I have to say it’s beyond me how anyone can go off and leave a child.’
Gemma swallowed then turned to Daisy, desperately trying to find a way of changing this subject, which appeared to be rapidly moving into very dangerous waters. Daisy’s mouth was covered with pink ice cream and while Gemma was rummaging in her bag for tissues the little girl suddenly gave a shriek and began pointing in excitement.
‘Look!’ she cried. ‘Gwanma! Gwanma!’
Gemma turned sharply and was in time to see her mother walking towards them across the grass. Initially she felt a surge of relief that attention would now hopefully be drawn away from herself, but immediately the relief was replaced by a new anxiety as from the expectant look of surprise on her mother’s face at finding her and Daisy with a stranger Gemma realised there could be a whole new set of questions to cope with.
‘Mum,’ she said faintly. ‘This is a surprise.’
‘I got finished sooner than I thought,’ Jill replied, dropping a kiss on Daisy’s head. ‘As it’s such a beautiful morning I thought I’d stroll across to meet you…’ She trailed off, her gaze coming to rest on Stephen who had risen to his feet at her approach.
‘Mum…this is Stephen,’ said Gemma, aware that the colour had rushed to her cheeks, ‘Stephen Preston. Stephen, my mother, Jill.’
‘Oh, hello, Stephen,’ said Jill brightly, taking his outstretched hand. ‘Didn’t we talk briefly on the phone one day?’
‘We did indeed.’ Stephen smiled. ‘I’m very pleased to meet you at last, Mrs Langford.’
‘Call me Jill, please. Everyone does…’ She paused. ‘You said “at last”. But haven’t you only just come to Denby General to work?’ She frowned, glanced at Gemma who was looking down at Daisy, then added, ‘You are the new registrar that Gemma told me about?’
‘Yes, that’s right.’ Stephen nodded. ‘But when I said “at last” I was referring to not having had the opportunity of meeting you in the past.’
Jill frowned again and with a laugh shook her head. ‘I’m sorry,’ she said, ‘but you’ve lost me. Should our paths have crossed in the past?’
‘Well, I would have thought there was a very good chance,’ Stephen replied. ‘After all, Gemma and I go back a long way.’
‘Really?’ Jill’s eyes widened. ‘I’m sorry, I didn’t know. You didn’t say, Gemma…’ she turned to her daughter with a slightly reproachful look.
‘Oh, I’m sure I did.’ Gemma murmured the reply lightly almost flippantly, but inside she could feel a wave of panic rising. ‘Stephen and I were at St Jerome’s at the same time,’ she added in what she hoped would be sufficient explanation.
‘Oh,’ said Jill. ‘Oh, I see.’ She still looked faintly bewildered.
‘I was terribly sorry to hear about your husband.’ Stephen drew a chair forward and Jill sat down. ‘It must have been a dreadful shock.’
‘Yes, it was,’ Jill replied quietly. ‘And it’s taken a time to pick up the pieces—but somehow we got through, didn’t we, Gemma?’
Gemma was still fussing over Daisy, but as the little girl began to squirm and squeal at the excessive wiping of her mouth she reluctantly sat back in her chair and glanced at her mother. At the same time, out of the corner of her eye, she was aware that Stephen was watching her closely.
‘Gemma tells me you’ve been a tremendous help to her with looking after Daisy,’ said Stephen.
Jill shrugged. ‘Let’s just say we’ve helped each other. I doubt if I’d have got through the last few years without Gemma.’ She paused. ‘So tell me, are you on Mr Van Haelfen’s team, Stephen?’
‘Yes, I am.’
‘He’s a wonderful man,’ said Jill. ‘He treated my late husband when he was so desperately ill in Denby General—unfortunately it was too late for Ken. But from what I heard, it seems Mr Van Haelfen is very highly thought of, by staff and patients alike.’
‘Oh, he is,’ said Stephen unhesitatingly. ‘I was extremely fortunate to get a place on his team when I came back from abroad.’
‘You’ve worked abroad?’ asked Jill innocently.
‘Yes, Dubai—for three years.’ He paused. ‘I’m sorry, Jill,’ he said. ‘Would you like an ice cream—or maybe a cup of coffee?’
‘No, thank you,’ she replied. ‘It’s getting very close to lunchtime.’
‘Yes.’ Gemma leapt to her feet. ‘Yes, it is. We should be going.’
Stephen also stood up. While Gemma helped Daisy into her buggy, he said, ‘I’ll walk back to the road with you.’
Slowly they began to stroll back past the lake and across the common to the main road. Gemma stayed mostly silent but Stephen and her mother seemed to be in animated conversation about everything from the state of the NHS to Stephen’s loft conversion and Jill’s job as a children’s librarian. They had almost reached the road when Jill looked at Stephen and said, ‘Do you have to rush away?’
‘Well, no, not really…’
‘In that case,’ said Jill enthusiastically, ‘how about you come and have a spot of lunch with us?’
Gemma’s heart sank. If Stephen came to the house, how many more questions would she have to contend with?
‘Oh, no, really,’ said Stephen. ‘I couldn’t impose.’
‘Don’t be silly—you wouldn’t be imposing at all,’ said Jill firmly. ‘Besides, it’s nothing elaborate—only a chicken salad in the garden. It’ll make a lovely change to have a friend of Gemma’s with us. I keep telling her she doesn’t have enough social life.’
‘Well, if you’re sure…’
‘I insist,’ said Jill firmly.
They reached the house with Gemma dazed over what was happening. She felt as if her emotions were being torn to shreds as on the one hand she battled with the incongruity of Stephen actually being right there in her home alongside Daisy with all that implied, and on the other hand her own almost overwhelming feelings at being so close to him again.
On entering the house, she immediately made the excuse that she had to attend to Daisy and, despite the little girl’s protests that she wanted to stay with Stephen, she whisked her away and up the stairs to the comparative safety of the bedroom.
As she removed Daisy’s sundress, which was now stained pink with ice cream, she could hear her mother and Stephen chatting amiably together downstairs. They really did seem to have hit it off, she thought, then wildly wondered what they were talking about. Was Stephen asking her mother questions about Daisy? Would he ask when her birthday was?
Suddenly, she was desperate to go downstairs again so that she could try to deflect any awkward questions as they were asked. Grabbing a clean cotton T-shirt, she attempted to pull it over Daisy’s head. ‘Come on, Daisy, hurry up,’ she urged as the little girl began twisting and turning.
When at last they went downstairs it was to find that Stephen and Jill were seated on the patio, enjoying a drink together.
‘Stephen was just telling me about his time in Dubai,’ said Jill as Gemma sat down beside her and Daisy toddled off to play in her sandpit.
‘Really?’ Gemma tried to sound noncommittal but feared that she failed dismally.
‘It sounds absolutely fascinating.’
‘Quite,’ said Gemma dryly. ‘So much so that I’m amazed he ever wanted to come back.’
A
n awkward silence followed then Jill got swiftly to her feet. ‘I must go and see to the lunch,’ she said.
‘Do you want any help?’ Gemma half rose from her chair as if to follow her mother but Jill held up her hand.
‘No,’ she said firmly, ‘I can manage. You stay and talk to Stephen.’ As she disappeared into the house through the French doors, Gemma sank back into her chair and turned her head away from Stephen to watch Daisy as she sat among her toys, playing happily in the sand. Suddenly she could think of nothing to say.
When the silence between them had almost become unbearable, Stephen spoke. ‘I thought she would have known about us,’ he said quietly.
It was perfectly obvious to Gemma what he meant, but her only response was a slight shrug as she continued to watch Daisy.
‘Why didn’t you tell her?’ he asked after a moment.
‘I don’t know. It was a long time ago, Stephen. I can’t remember.’
‘It wasn’t that long ago.’
‘OK.’ She took a deep breath. ‘Well, I probably did tell her I was seeing someone…’
‘Seeing someone?’ He looked hurt. ‘Is that all it was? I rather thought it was more than that.’
‘You have to remember, Stephen,’ she went on, deliberately ignoring what he’d just said, unable to cope with either that or the wounded look in his eyes, ‘I wasn’t living at home then. We were in the Midlands…I didn’t see much of my parents. I also knew from previous experience that I only had to mention that I’d had a date with someone and my mother was planning a wedding.’
‘But for a while there,’ he protested, ‘we were practically living together.’
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