I went over and tapped her on the shoulder. She turned around, red-eyed, and gave me a hug.
‘The last time I felt this rubbish I was hungover, remember? Maybe we should do another cheeseburger run?’ Eloise attempted to joke, but her heart wasn’t in it.
‘You’ll get snatched up for a great job, I know you will,’ I said.
‘I hope so,’ she muttered. ‘If not, there’s always PR. I’ve heard it pays more anyway.’
Gen, Carla and Sia rushed over. ‘Eloise, we’re going to the pub right now — you in?’
‘I’m technically unemployed, right?’ Eloise said. ‘Probably shouldn’t.’
Sia waved an envelope. ‘The beauty sale money will cover everything. And forget about cleaning up — Rae’s given us the okay to leave it.’
‘It’s the least this company can do for us,’ spat Gen, still fired up.
‘Josie, you in?’ asked Carla.
‘Ah, thanks, but I’d better get going,’ I said. ‘Thanks for everything, guys.’ I hugged them all, squeezing Eloise and Sia extra tight.
‘I’ll see you soon, colleague,’ whispered Sia, keeping her exciting new job a secret for the sake of the others.
I watched them walk away, knowing I’d never see them all together in the Sash office again.
Steph was standing alone in the corner. I walked over to tell her my news, but as I drew closer I realised her face was white. ‘What? What is it, Steph?’
‘Rae wants to see me in her office. Right now, apparently. Maybe she knows I stole Dad’s car the other night and drove up the coast.’
‘You stole your dad’s car?’
That made her giggle. ‘Shhhhh.’
The receptionist called over to us. ‘Steph, Rae’s ready to see you now.’
‘Okay,’ Steph replied. She turned back to me. ‘Will I catch you later? You’re staying at Tim’s, right?’
‘I’m meant to be,’ I said, ‘but I was thinking of killing time in the city. I don’t want to walk in on James and Summer hooking up on the couch.’
Steph wrinkled her nose. ‘Firstly, gross. Secondly, he’s working.’
‘Really?’
‘Yeah, take this key and let yourself in. I’ll be back later on and we can debrief.’
‘Sounds perfect,’ I replied. ‘Good luck in there. Hope you’re not done for grand theft auto.’
‘Me too.’ She rolled her eyes.
Goodbyes done, I left the office, soaking it all in one last time. On the street, I punched Kat’s number into my phone — I had to tell her my news. Then I wondered if she’d throw a hissy fit over the death of her favourite magazine, so I decided I’d only tell her about moving to the city for now, and the fact she’d get my bedroom with the larger wardrobe. The RIP Sash news could wait for a face-to-face chat.
‘What?’ she said when she answered.
‘Hey, how you doing?’
‘Pretty busy.’
‘Oh, okay … So how’s Mum?’
‘Same old. Reading books, napping in the garden, eating cake …’
‘Cool. And how are you? Coping?’
‘Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?’ The old Kat was back, and this time around she had extra bite.
‘Fair enough … So, I kinda have some big news. Is Mum there? Put me on speaker phone.’
Kat burst into laughter. ‘Oh, that’s hilarious.’
‘It is?’
‘Sorry, what did you say?’ She giggled. ‘Koby just sent me the funniest video. There’s, like, this dog who falls into a box of biscuits. Okay, it sounds lame but it’s awesome.’
I shook my head, confused. ‘Koby?’
‘Yeah. My boyfriend. Duh.’
Of course. I mean, I’d never heard of the guy, but of course.
‘I might call you back at a better time,’ I said.
‘Righto,’ she said and hung up before I could add anything else.
In the past, Kat blowing me off for a canine YouTube clip would have annoyed me — a lot. But after everything we’d been through, it just made me laugh. Some things never changed, and in the case of my feisty, larger-than-life sister that wasn’t such a bad thing. My news could wait.
At Tim’s, I lay full-length on the couch and daydreamed. Everything was falling into place. Finally. Uni was back on track, I had an amazing job lined up, my family life was on the mend and I had a group of awesome friends. Sure, there were still some murky areas — the whole James situation, for one — but generally life was kicking butt. And for once, not mine.
It dawned on me that I needed to tell Angel the news and I had no idea how she was going to react.
‘Hang on, I’m flossing,’ she said when she answered my call, her voice muffled.
After she’d finished, I rambled on about the magazine closing down, the amazing writing job at indi with Liani, and how she and Rae knew that Ava had set me up after all.
When I’d finished, rather than scream, shout or squeal like I’d been expecting, Angel’s voice softened. ‘Wow, Jose, it’s happening,’ she said. ‘The job in the city — you’re really doing it.’
I swallowed. ‘Yeah, it’s kinda scary, huh?’
Angel went quiet. ‘I’m going to miss you.’
‘Oh, shut up before you make me cry, I’m not going that far,’ I said, but it was too late. Warm, salty tears rolled down my cheeks and I wondered whether our friendship would ever be the same again. Together Angel and I had survived braces, bullying, parties (usually not being invited to them), crushes, broken hearts, exams, assignments and family dramas. But for some reason I couldn’t shake the strange feeling that things were about to change, big time.
‘So, actually, I’ve been dying to tell you something …’ Angel said.
I thought I had all her tones down, but this one was unreadable — it lingered somewhere between her I-just-made-out-with-a-boy voice and her I-just-heard-the-craziest-gossip-about-that-bully-we-hate voice.
‘Tell me,’ I said.
‘I’m dropping out of uni.’
Shocked, I sat upright on the sofa. ‘What? Does your dad know?’
‘Yeah, he’s not happy about it, but he knows,’ Angel said. ‘Uni wasn’t for me. I mean, arts. What was I thinking? Everyone knows an arts degree is just an excuse to wear a tea-cosy as a beanie and make out with your tutor.’
‘It is?’
Angel’s voice became more serious. ‘Look, you’ve done so well being away from this place, and if I don’t get out of here now, I’m never going to. I’ll end up stacking shelves at night like Tahnee’s aunt. I’m eighteen! I want what you’ve got.’
‘So what’s the plan?’ I asked.
‘I’m going to Europe,’ she squealed. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d heard her sound so happy. ‘Staying in hostels, overdosing on pasta, working in bars …’
‘Are you serious?’
‘Want me to save space in my backpack for you?’
I avoided her question. ‘When are you leaving?’
Angel paused. ‘Next week.’
‘Next week? No, you can’t. That’s so soon!’ Too soon. I couldn’t believe it. My hands were drenched in sweat.
‘You could come, too, Jose. Picture it: you and me taking on Europe. It’d be rad. We could get matching neck pillows for the plane.’
I bit my lip. Angel was my best friend, and it would be amazing to travel with her. But I wanted to write. I wanted to tell stories. I wanted to dig up facts and report them. I wanted to be a journalist, and Liani was giving me the opportunity to do exactly that before I’d even finished my degree. As awesome as it would be to have a picnic underneath the Eiffel Tower with Angel, that wasn’t going to make my dream come true.
‘I can’t come,’ I said, ‘I just can’t. But you’d better send me a buttload of postcards.’
‘Postcards! Haven’t you heard of Skype, grandma?’ Angel laughed, and I knew it was going to be okay.
‘Well, we can always Face-stalk each other. And you’d better
learn how to read a map before you go.’
‘You were always the navigation queen,’ she said. ‘I’d just get us lost in the dodgy part of town.’
‘Remember that time you took us down the wrong street and we saw that drug deal happen next to the butcher’s? We thought they were going to come after us and kill us.’
Angel let out a small snort of laughter, which set us both off.
‘Now it’ll just be me, all alone in big, bad Europe,’ she said when she could talk again. ‘Reckon they do map-reading courses for dummies over there? And what if I can’t understand any of the languages? Maybe I’ll hire a hot tutor or something. The only word I know in French is “hello” — “adios”, right?’
I almost didn’t have the heart to tell her ‘adios’ meant goodbye in Spanish, but then imagined her offending a sexy French waiter while ordering a chocolate-filled croissant, so I filled her in — and taught her a few French words. As Angel freaked out, it hit me like a sharp slap in the face: she wasn’t the only one who needed to brush up on her solo skills.
In a matter of days, I was going to know how it felt to be alone, really alone, without my beautiful, brave best friend to call on. Was I scared of losing her? Terrified. But I didn’t want to bring her down, so I gulped and forced a laugh as she ranted about her flight’s carry-on rules; and pushed aside the thought that my life was changing again and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it.
25.
When Angel had hung up, I lay down on the sofa, contemplating whether I could be bothered undressing, filling the bathtub with water and bubbles and chilling out properly. Easy answer: no.
The lounge room door opened and James poked his head in with a smile that … oh, you get the idea. The guy looked so cute I may have blushed just from breathing the same air as him. His dimples were dimpling, his shaggy hair was shagging and his jacket made him look like an indie rock star. ‘Hey, James,’ I said, struggling to concoct anything intelligible to say to the guy who’d turned me into a pining angst-ridden mess.
‘Hey, stranger,’ he said, walking into the room. ‘I thought I heard talking coming from in here. Having a party for one?’
‘How are you?’ I asked. ‘I thought you’d be at work.’
‘Yeah, I was.’ He shrugged. ‘Answered a few calls, wrote a few emails, served a few customers … got fired.’
‘No way! What happened?’
‘I called my boss a jackass,’ he said, leaning against the wall. ‘Oops.’ He bit his lip. ‘It’s for the best, though.’
‘Yeah?’
‘There’s a pretty cool music production course down the road. I won’t have money to eat, but who needs food when you’re a rock star, right?’ He grinned, showing off those dimples again.
‘Your dad will be so proud,’ I teased. ‘Seriously, though, it sounds really great … Oh, and thanks for the laptop, by the way. I love it.’
‘All good.’
James took a seat on the arm of the couch. Now that he was closer, I could smell his cologne — a light but masculine fragrance that made me think of an ocean breeze. With him perched so close and me lying down, it almost felt like we were breaking the rules. But we weren’t. Everything was innocent and above board and focused on safe topics like ‘work’ and ‘parents’.
Until I spoke again.
‘So, ah, Summer must be worried about you losing your job,’ I said, pulling my knees up to my chest. ‘I mean, not worried about the money, just, you know, worried about you. Like all girlfriends would be, or so I imagine …’
Shut up, Josie, I thought to myself.
James lowered his eyes. ‘I don’t know about that.’
‘Oh?’ I cocked my head to one side. ‘Why? I thought you guys were stronger than ever.’
‘Are you kidding?’ he said. ‘Jose, she convinced herself I’d been cheating on her for months and lost it.’
‘What?’
‘Constant phone calls at home, at work — she even hassled my mates about it.’
‘Oh,’ I said.
‘Then she hooked up with my boss.’
‘Oh! I can see why you called him a jackass.’
‘And two of my boss’s mates.’
‘That’s awful.’ The words sounded empty, fake, but I didn’t know what else to say. ‘I’m sorry, I had no idea,’ I rambled on. ‘Tim didn’t say anything.’
‘Tim? He wouldn’t know if his boxers were on backwards.’
I nodded. ‘True.’
I couldn’t believe James had been single and getting his heart run over by Summer The Bulldozer all this time.
‘The craziest part is, I wasn’t even cheating!’ he said ‘Not at all. Although …’
Uh-oh, I thought, my entire faith in guys was about to be shot here. If James turned out to be a cheater like Billy, I’d sign up to the nunnery that afternoon.
‘Well, the thing is, a while back Summer caught me … um …’
‘Caught you …?’ I almost didn’t want to know. But at the same time I had to know. I wanted — needed — to know everything.
‘I was sleeptalking, Jose, and, I, ah, may have said your name. Something about you being hot and wanting to kiss you. Allegedly.’
‘Oh.’ I gulped. ‘Allegedly, hey?’
‘Well, it got Summer all fired up and, yeah … didn’t go down too well.’
In shock over James’s confession, I swallowed, blushed and sighed all at once, which caused a spluttering coughing attack. One hand flew to my mouth, while the other clung onto the side of the sofa for support. I felt like a wheezy old man coughing over the carrots and broccoli in the supermarket.
‘Are you okay?’ James kneeled on the floor and stroked my back while I coughed.
I nodded. ‘Um, yeah, I’m good. You were saying …’
‘Summer and I were meant to be right for each other, you know? Everyone said so. I didn’t question it. And then I met you. You were so … so … annoying!’
‘Excuse me?’ I knew I was annoying, but I didn’t want Super Hot Guy Of My Dreams to think that, too.
‘But in a cute way,’ he went on. ‘Without even realising or trying, you got me.’
‘I did?’
‘I tried to ignore it. You were seventeen and —’
‘Eighteen now.’
‘Ahhh, would you let me talk?’
‘Sorry.’ I tried not to smile. I failed.
‘And then Summer and I broke up, and you told me that you — well, that you … you know what you said.’
‘Right.’ I sighed. ‘I know. I ruined it. But you’ve got to understand — I’m a battler. A dork. Seriously, I deserve some kind of award for making it through today without getting my hand caught in a door.’
James grinned. ‘But the thing is —’
‘This sounds familiar,’ I interrupted.
‘Would you just … I’m crazy about you.’
I gulped. ‘Can you say that again? I think I imagined you telling me you like me.’
James climbed onto the sofa so we were facing each other. His long legs were crossed and squeezed up toward his chin, like a praying mantis. ‘No, I didn’t. I said I’m crazy about you.’
‘But I’m so —’
‘It doesn’t matter.’
‘And what about my —’
‘I don’t care.’
‘But I like eating Nutella straight from the jar while watching musicals.’
He laughed. ‘Yeah, we can work on that. But when you’re not busting my balls for breaking in to my own apartment, or eating all my Hawaiian pizza, I can’t stop thinking about you.’
I stared at him in stunned silence as our entire history flashed before my eyes. (If my life were a movie I’d have cued eighties music for a montage scene at that moment.)
‘Well?’ he said. ‘Don’t leave me hanging out here.’
What was I meant to say to the guy I’d liked for months? I love you! Marry me! Have my babies! Maybe not. I settled for the truth.
<
br /> ‘James, I’ve never done this before —’
And then he leaned forward and kissed me. Our lips grazed softly and his hand cupped my face.
I pulled away. ‘This is really happening, right? If this turns out to be a dream …’
James laughed and pulled me closer so I was sitting in his lap. We kissed again, hesitantly at first, but the kisses quickly grew faster and more heated. Tingles surged through my body.
Suddenly, the front door burst open, causing me to squeal.
‘Josssssie!’ hollered Tim.
‘Oh, god, they’re kissing!’ yelled Steph.
We all looked at each other, swapping smirks and awkward smiles. Then we collapsed into laughter. As I cackled along with everyone else, I noticed James’s arm was still wrapped around me.
‘You guys!’ cooed Steph.
‘Oi, mate, am I meant to give you some kind of pep talk about hooking up with my little cousin?’ Tim asked.
James laughed. ‘If you want.’
With the awkwardness over — well, as much as it could be — I noticed the familiar scent of ham, cheese, pineapple and tomato wafting up my nostrils. ‘Is that …?’
‘Come with me, child,’ said Steph. ‘Dinner is served.’
I snuck a look at James, who grinned and helped me up. The passionate moment was over but I wanted to repeat it thirty times a day for as long as my lips could handle it.
The moon glinted through the lounge room window, casting its dull light over our group. Steph and Tim were curled on the couch, Tim rubbing his belly after taking on our challenge to devour twelve slices of pizza. James and I sat on the floor. Only our pinkie fingers were laced together, but it was enough to send shudders of electricity through my hand. I wondered if he felt it, too. The television hummed in the background.
‘Quick, turn it off,’ Steph hissed to Tim, pointing at the remote next to him.
He fumbled for it, but didn’t pick it up fast enough (his reflexes slowed down by all that cheese, no doubt) and I saw what Steph was desperate to hide from me. Billy and Kara were being interviewed on Your Night, a trashy tabloid news program. The caption ‘Billy: I can’t wait to be a dad’ flashed up on the bottom of the screen below footage of Billy rubbing Kara’s engorged belly.
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