Twice Dead

by Caitlin Seal

  Naya’s eyes snapped open. This wasn’t right.

  “What are you doing?” Corten asked.

  “I can’t do this, I’m sorry.” She stood up. “It isn’t going to work.”

  Corten stood and took a step toward her. “But you haven’t even—”

  “Please, just leave me alone.” The sensations weren’t going away. She could feel them pushing in from all sides now. The boy, and now an old man lying in the gutter somewhere far to her left. The sickness in him oozed like slime on her skin. Naya spun, scanning the edges of the plaza until she caught sight of the man. She took a hesitant step toward him, but then another sensation slammed into her. In one of the houses nearby a couple fought, their bitter anger making her vibrate with the need to be away from them. She covered her ears and stumbled sideways. What Corten had called the pulse assaulted every one of her senses. It intensified by the second. She tasted sorrow, like pepper and vinegar, and felt excitement like goose bumps on her skin. The worst part was that she wanted nothing more than to draw it in. There was power there, life, and the opportunity to lose herself in that chaotic surge.

  Monster. Those lives weren’t hers to steal from. Maybe aether really was excess energy. Maybe none of those people would ever miss what she took. But that didn’t make her feel any less like a beast preying on them.

  “Blue, you need to focus.” Corten’s hand was on hers. He was leaning in close, his fingers surprisingly warm against hers. “Don’t get lost in it.”

  She took a step, and then another. She could feel Corten moving with her, but it was getting harder and harder to pick her own thoughts out from the maelstrom. Her legs wobbled, and the bones in her hand burned with hunger. Corten spoke, but his words were nonsense in her ears. If she didn’t do something soon, the press of all those emotions would destroy her.

  The last shred of her will snapped and Naya drew in a deep, shuddering breath. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.

  Naya opened herself to the wild, pulsing energy and gulped it in. For an instant it felt like the flood of foreign emotions would sear her away to nothing. Then the world snapped back into focus. Her exhaustion vanished, and the pain in her hand dulled to a barely noticeable ache. She was kneeling next to the bench. She could still sense the city’s pulse, but her own thoughts were clearer now. Corten knelt in front of her, his gold-flecked eyes wide with shock.

  “Well…” he said after a long silence, during which Naya struggled to gather her scattered wits. “I guess you don’t do anything halfway.” He stood up. After brushing off his dusty pants, he held out his hand. “I think maybe that’s enough for today.”

  Naya followed Corten back to Lucia’s shop in a daze. Her body hummed with aether, and the city’s energy swirled around her in a distracting mix of sensations. Sometimes she felt it brush against her skin, like heavy, damp mist. Other times it was a pale-blue light condensing around the rune bindings on door frames, lamps, and other undead she walked past. When the emotions in that energy were strong, they overwhelmed her every sense.

  Corten was a single spot of calm in the shifting torrent. Though a faint blue outline sometimes glowed around him, she could sense nothing of his emotions.

  A few blocks from the shop, they passed a grocer’s where two men argued over an upturned cart of cabbages. Before, Naya would have walked right past without a second glance. But now she stumbled under the sudden force of their frustration and anger. It twisted at her and filled her mouth with the acrid tang of smoke and iron. Corten helped her to her feet, and after a few more steps the sensation faded. “How do you manage it? How can you pretend something like this is normal?” Naya asked, her voice shaking.

  Corten’s face was pinched with worry when his eyes met hers. “You need to stay focused. Try to concentrate on the physical world. You shouldn’t be able to sense other people unless you’re pulling aether from them.”

  The shop’s front door was locked when they got back. Naya noticed the same faint glow around the edge of the door that she’d seen that morning. Now she realized what it must be—aether collecting around the door. Had Lucia guarded her shop with some sort of rune ward? Naya had heard of wealthy lords and merchants in Talmir who purchased wards that could produce a loud noise or light if anyone tried to break into their homes.

  “Are you all right?” Corten asked.

  Naya blinked, realizing she’d been staring at the door. “I’m fine.” She pulled out the key Lucia had given her, but her hands were shaking so badly that it took her three tries to fit the cursed thing into the lock.

  Once inside the shop, she shuffled through the tiny front reception room and into the workroom. When she turned she saw Corten standing on the threshold. His face was carefully blank and his stance tense. Naya didn’t understand what had caused the tension between him and Lucia, but it was obvious he didn’t want to linger. “You don’t have to stay,” she said. The energy she’d absorbed raged inside her, making her hands shake. At least the city’s pulse felt weaker inside the shop.

  Corten shook his head. “You shouldn’t be left alone like this.”

  Naya clenched her teeth. “I’m fine.”

  “You’re shaking.”

  Naya crossed her arms over her chest and tried to sort her own emotions from the storm inside her. One part of her wished Corten would just leave her alone. He was the one who’d made her do this. He hadn’t warned her what would happen. For all she knew he’d done it on purpose to laugh at her suffering.

  A more logical part pointed out that Corten’s concern seemed genuine, and so far all he’d tried to do was help. “It’s the aether,” she said. “I feel like someone made me drink a dozen cups of tea.” She paced to the far side of the room and turned back. “Or maybe a hundred.” A hundred cups of poison tea stolen from the minds of the men and women around her.

  Corten gave her a sympathetic smile. “That happens when you draw too much. It takes practice to learn your limits.” He looked around the room and seemed to come to a decision. “I know something that should help.” He walked toward the little furnace at the back of the workroom and motioned for her to follow. “Put your hand here.”

  Naya backed away. She’d noticed the rune furnace before. Such things existed in Talmir but were uncommon outside the homes of the wealthy or those with connections to the Academy of Magics. Her father had only managed to get one installed last year and at first she’d found it strange to see one in Lucia’s otherwise modest shop. But she remembered her father once telling her that rune scribes in Ceramor weren’t organized through a single institution the way they were in Talmir. Anyone with a bit of knowledge and the right skills could try their hand at carving runes. It made things like Lucia’s stove, and the ward on the door, cheaper and easier to acquire, but also meant they lacked the sophistication and consistency of Talmiran creations.

  Naya eyed the stove warily and saw a circle of wavering blue runes that seemed to glow from somewhere inside its metal belly. “What will it do to me?” she asked.

  “It will draw out some of the extra aether.” Corten held out his hand to her.

  Naya looked from the furnace to Corten. A part of her still wanted to curl up in a ball and scream. Everything was happening too fast. And despite what she’d said to Celia, she wasn’t at all sure she could become what Valn needed. But what other option did she have? She could feel her father’s letter where it rested in her pocket. He was counting on her to help protect Talmir. Naya locked away her fear and took Corten’s hand. His fingers brushed against hers as he guided her to a spot on the furnace. The metal was hot against her palm, but not unpleasantly so. Corten turned the dial on the side of the furnace. A faint click sounded as the metal plates inside shifted. Moments later a second circle of pale-blue runes began to glow from within.

  Naya felt a pull. It was the same as what she’d felt waiting for the tram with Lucia, only not as strong. The buzzing
inside her lessened as she watched wisps of blue energy flow from her hand to the runes. She peeked through the window at the stove’s front. The dial obviously worked the same as the one on her father’s furnace. By turning it, Corten had shifted two rune plates together to create a second circle of heat runes. When those runes activated, they’d somehow begun drawing energy away from Naya’s bones.

  After a moment Corten turned the dial back down. The plates separated and the light faded from the second set of runes. Naya looked down at her hand, rubbing one finger over the spot where her bones rested.

  “Better?” Corten asked.

  Naya nodded. “I—”

  The workroom door opened. Corten’s head snapped up and the smile left his face. “Lucia.”

  Lucia paused on the threshold. “Corten, Blue. I didn’t expect you back yet.” She carried a parcel wrapped in brown paper under one arm. “I trust her aether is now stable?”

  “She should be all right for a while. But I need to speak to you in private.” Corten’s tone became suddenly formal.

  Lucia paused, her eyes darting between Naya and Corten. “Of course. Blue, why don’t you wait here?” She smiled, but now that Naya was aware of the aether, she could feel Lucia’s unease. Naya looked at Corten, but he avoided her eyes and followed Lucia up the stairs. What could Corten want to say to Lucia that he didn’t want her to hear? He’d acted friendly enough. But what if he’d realized she wasn’t what she claimed? What if he meant to warn Lucia? The two obviously weren’t on good terms. But Corten must have still felt some loyalty to her, or he wouldn’t have agreed to help. Naya needed to know what they were saying.

  She snuck up the stairs, pausing halfway when she heard raised voices coming from the second floor.

  “—against her will. What were you thinking?” Corten asked.

  Lucia’s reply was softer. Naya inched farther up the stairs, but before she could catch anything else, a door slammed above her. Naya scrambled back down the stairs, just making it into the workroom before Corten descended. He gave her a look she couldn’t interpret, then headed for the exit. Naya tried to follow, but Lucia caught her arm.

  “What are you doing?” Naya asked.

  “You will be staying here,” Lucia said with surprising firmness.

  Naya pulled free. “You don’t get to decide where I go.”

  Lucia pushed her glasses up her nose, her lips tightening with irritation. “I know. Your master has made me painfully aware of that fact. But I would have thought you’d have a vested interest in keeping this mad business a secret. Go after him now and you only risk poking more holes in the story we are trying to establish.”

  “Why? What did he say?”

  Lucia shook her head. “He doesn’t know the truth, but you seem to have given him the impression that I’m holding you here against your will. For now he’s not a threat. But I suggest you steer clear of him in the future.”

  “If you’re so worried about me speaking to him, then why did you send me there in the first place?” Naya asked.

  Lucia rubbed her temples. “Because it was the natural thing to do. If we are to make others believe this farce the ambassador has concocted, then I must treat you as I would any other patient. Had I truly resurrected you and purchased your contract on a whim, and had I later found you were having difficulties adapting, then Corten would have been my first choice for assisting you. My other option was to risk your bond fading entirely. I think the ambassador would agree that avoiding that outcome was worth a small gamble.”

  Lucia’s reasoning made sense, but it didn’t satisfy Naya’s doubts. “If having him teach me was the natural thing to do, then won’t avoiding him now make us look more suspicious?”

  Naya thought she saw a muscle under Lucia’s eye twitch. “He’s obviously angry with me, but he isn’t the sort to spread rumors. Now that he’s taught you what I asked, we’ll both be better off if you keep your distance and avoid giving him any more reasons to ask questions.”

  For the next four days Lucia kept Naya busy with errands and mundane tasks. Every time she wanted to snap at the necromancer, Naya reminded herself of Celia’s warning. She swallowed her pride and did her best to adopt the manners of the quiet servant she was supposed to be. As she worked, she kept an eye out for Corten, but he didn’t return after his fight with Lucia. That was probably a good thing. If he didn’t come back, then he couldn’t ask inconvenient questions. Still, Naya was surprised to feel a twinge of disappointment. She told herself it was only because Corten’s explanations had been so much clearer than Lucia’s. That, and it would have been nice to learn from someone who didn’t so obviously distrust her. Lucia always seemed to be watching Naya when she thought Naya wasn’t looking. And the answers she gave to Naya’s questions were either so vague, or so technically complex, as to be useless.

  Despite Lucia’s reluctant help, Naya began to adjust to the aether and the extra sense that Celia had called the sight. She’d been seeing snatches of aether ever since her resurrection, but learning to spot it on purpose took practice. It was a matter of unfocusing her eyes, and convincing herself that what she was seeing wasn’t impossible.

  When she finally mastered the trick, the world lit up with a subtle glow that was both beautiful and frightening. Pale-blue energy drifted constantly from the living, concentrating to a brighter glow where it was drawn into rune bindings.

  While the sight came easily enough, learning to change her features was another matter entirely.

  “It’s too complicated, especially given your rudimentary understanding of aether. Some wraiths never master the change,” Lucia said when Naya asked.

  Naya thought of several snarky answers but kept them pinned behind her lips. “You’re a necromancer. Surely you of all people could explain it.”

  Lucia’s eyebrow twitched, but her voice didn’t betray the smoky anger Naya felt in her aether. “If you wish to master the subject, start with Sellencio’s Aether and Will.” She gestured to a set of thick books near the top of one of the shelves.

  Naya smiled, though it felt more like a grimace. “Ambassador Valn thinks it’s important I learn this.”

  “Then you’d best start reading.” Lucia turned her attention to refilling one of the many jars of herbs lined up on the counter.

  “Or,” Naya said, keeping her tone light, “perhaps I should go ask Corten for help.”

  Lucia froze. “Don’t. There’s no reason to involve him further.” She took a deep breath. “I promise, Sellencio’s works are as thorough an explanation as you could ever hope for.”

  Naya’s heart sank as she eyed the massive books. She wanted to push further, but she wasn’t sure what would convince Lucia to be more helpful. Maybe she could speak to Celia later about Lucia’s uncooperative attitude. For now she’d learn what she needed with or without Lucia’s help.

  Naya spent her nights trying to master what Lucia wouldn’t teach. She struggled through dense books, stopping every few hours to stare into a mirror and try to force her features to change. In some ways it reminded her of her days back at the academy. There she had stayed up late almost every night, reading until her eyes blurred and trying to ignore the loneliness that hung over her, as stifling as a heavy cloak in summer.

  Though she didn’t need sleep, she sometimes found her thoughts drifting into a dreamlike state. She imagined herself home in Lith Lor, or learning knots from the sailors on the deck of the Gallant. The familiar memories were a welcome refuge from the strangeness around her. In the last week it seemed everything had turned inside out and upside down. Her father was a spy. The Talmiran ambassador kept a necromancer under his thumb. And when Naya closed her eyes, she saw the smile of a boy who should have been her enemy.

  She knew necromancy was wrong. The dead were supposed to stay dead. But the more she thought about it, the harder it was to reconcile that truth with the kindness sh
e’d seen in Corten’s eyes. He could have left her alone. Instead he’d helped her, and he’d seemed truly angry when he learned Lucia was supposedly forcing Naya to serve against her will. Those weren’t the actions of a monster.

  Two days before her meeting with Celia, Naya climbed onto the shop’s roof to take a break from her studies. She was just settling down to watch the stars when she heard the front door open. Naya frowned. Hadn’t Lucia already gone to sleep? She peeked over the edge of the roof and saw Lucia walking down the darkened street. Where could she be going at this hour?

  Celia claimed they could control Lucia. But how secure was that control? Naya hesitated, then hurried to follow Lucia. Her new identity felt like such a fragile thing. If Lucia proved untrustworthy, then all of it would fall apart. She had to find out where the necromancer was going.

  By the time Naya reached the front door, Lucia was already at the end of the street. On her way out, Naya grabbed a simple green shawl from the hook by the door and wrapped it loosely over her hair in a style common among the local women. It was barely any disguise at all, but until she learned to change her features, it would have to do.

  Naya followed Lucia down their narrow lane, past the flower seller’s shop, and onto one of the wider streets, where a few people still lingered outside restaurants and cafés. At night the aether around Lucia’s shop usually settled into a sleepy haze so subtle Naya didn’t notice it unless she concentrated. But here the air was alive with a peppery unrest that made the back of her neck itch. Men and women held animated conversations over tables scattered with empty glasses. Naya ignored the tightness in her chest as she hurried on, trying to keep her focus on Lucia.

  The necromancer was obviously nervous, glancing back over her shoulder every couple of minutes and forcing Naya to stay far back or risk being seen. Lucia continued to the end of the street, then disappeared into a shabby-looking café. Naya hesitated, tugging her shawl a little tighter. She doubted it’d be easy to avoid detection inside, but if she turned back now she’d learn nothing for her trouble.