by Brenda Ford
“There is something about you,” he whispers to me as I scream loudly. I can barely hear him, but the words get to me just enough to make this even better. I haven’t ever felt as close to another human being as I do Wesley right now and it’s amazing. “Something about you that I never want to let go of.”
Chapter 7 - Wesley
What am I playing at? I think to myself as I send Zoe yet another flirty glance across the office. It hasn’t ever been like this before; I have always been hateful of her… but last night changed everything. So did this morning. Waking up in her bed and having her arms around me was a surprisingly nice sensation. I didn’t want to get up. I didn’t want to come to work, I wanted to remain with her just talking and kissing and…
Oh my God, you soppy bastard. I smile and drag my eyes away, questioning myself about how I have ended up here. I never get all sentimental and emotionally involved in any woman, but with her I can’t seem to stop myself. I guess it’s true what they say, that there is a very thin line between hate and… well, I don’t know about love exactly, I don’t think I am quite there yet, but you know, pleasant feelings. It seems to have switched over so quickly that I don’t know which way to look my head is spinning so much.
The more that I looked around her apartment this morning, the more I knew for sure that me and her couldn’t be more different if we tried. I’m definitely not a scented candle and dream catcher type of guy… but that stuff doesn’t have to define her. There can be more to her than a person who is the opposite to me.
And there is more to her. So much more. I don’t know everything about her yet, far from it really, but I’m excited to learn more. For the first time since I laid eyes on her I want to get to know what’s deeper within her. I guess we will have all the time in the world now, since we’re having a baby together.
The idea of me and her doing it together, not just co-parenting, but actually being in it for real, makes it much less scary. I can already kind of see us as a cute little family. Okay, so maybe we didn’t exactly have that conversation, we didn’t decide definitively that we’re going to be together, there wasn’t much time for that this morning, but it feels like it’s headed that way. It has to be, doesn’t it? Otherwise what are we doing?
I glance around the office, wondering what people will say when they find out the truth about us. A tight, small, close knit office like this is rife for gossip. It we make it work then it will die down and just become normal eventually, but there will be a time when the pressure will be hard to bear for the pair of us. Will we be able to wish stand that? I would like to think so, but I don’t know… or am I just worrying about too much? Trying to run before we have even walked? Seeing issues in the future when we haven’t even dealt with the right now?
“Dude, what the fuck is going on?” my friend from the accounting team, Court, demands as he perches on the edge of my desk like he belongs there. It does drive me mad when he interrupts me like this, but right now I need something else to focus on other than the mess I’m in the middle of creating in my brain. “Because this place is rife today. There are rumors going around that you and Zoe turned up together today.”
“Oh… there are?” Yeah, we probably should be a bit more careful about that if we don’t want to be the subject of gossip, invited in by ourselves. “I don’t know anything about that.”
“Well, is there something going on, or what? Because there was all that arguing yesterday…”
“That’s just normal for me and Zoe.” I shrug, trying to play it off. “You know we’re always that way.”
“About work, yes, but I heard that it was a personal life argument. As in you two are hooking up.”
Fucking hell, news travels ridiculously fast in this place. I roll my eyes and shake my head. “Well, I don’t know what you have heard but it’s crazy. Nothing has changed in this place.”
“So, I didn’t just catch you smiling at her? Because I have never seen you smile at her before?”
Urgh, well that is something that I can’t deny because he has seen it with his own eyes. “I can smile.”
“Not at your enemy, no. Unless she isn’t really your enemy anymore.” He slaps me on the shoulder. “Come on, you can tell me. Tell me anything. I will keep it between the two of us.”
Yeah right! I almost declare loudly. As if he will keep whatever I tell him to himself. There isn’t a chance in hell of that. Court loves gossip just as much as everyone else. I need to just get rid of him already. I thought that the distraction would help, but if anything, he is only making it a million times worse.
“I don’t know. I guess she isn’t too bad, that’s all. That must be what has people talking because we aren’t going to be at one another’s throats anymore. But that will just make everything so much easier for us here, won’t it? I don’t exactly want to spend my time in this office dealing with drama.”
“Hmm, yeah, I guess not.” Court is disappointed, but that’s because he loves drama. Well, he can create his own drama if that’s what he wants to do because I absolutely refuse to get in the middle of it. For the first time ever, I am going to rise above it all and focus on what needs to be done instead. “I just thought…”
“Well, it seems like everyone is doing too much thinking,” I snapped. “Not enough working.”
“This is about work actually… I thought that it might be something to do with the promotion.”
That gets my attention. I snap my head up and narrow my eyes at Court. “What do you mean?”
“You heard about Old Bill retiring at last, didn’t you? Apparently, he has some retirement home in the Bahamas and he’s ready to take his brand new Thai bride there for the rest of his days…”
“Old Bill?” Oh my God. He’s the guy in the job above me. And damn good at it as well. Things will definitely change if he goes… but it also means that there will be an opening. An opening for the job that I have wanted for years. Not that I have been wanting Old Bill to retire… well, maybe a little bit.
“So, someone will be getting a promotion then?” I ask Court desperately. “Am I up for it?”
“You and Zoe, yes. Which is why all of this new stuff worries me. If you guys are hooking up… well, what if she’s doing it just to throw you off track because she wants to have the job and not you.”
I part my lips, wanting to come back with some sort of witty retort, but I don’t have anything to say. Just because me and Zoe have always competed, it doesn’t mean that she would do this, does it? She doesn’t seem like that sort of person to me. Although I suppose I don’t really know her that much…
“This is crazy.” I jump up. “I’m going to see what the fuck is going on from Andy.”
I stalk in to his office and swing the door open. Andy looks like he has been preparing himself for this outburst because he isn’t surprised to see me at all. He smiles and indicates for me to sit down.
“Andy, is Old Bill retiring?” I demand. “How does everyone know about this but me?”
“No one is supposed to know what’s going on, but it’s impossible to keep secrets here.”
“So, he is going? Am I going to be up for the position? Because you know that I want it…”
“You will be considered, along with other people in this office, and we will open it up to outside candidates as well because you know that’s something we have to do. It’s company policy.”
That isn’t the reassurance that I would like to hear, but I suppose it’s enough. “So, who else? In the office, I mean. I would like to know who I am up against. I think that it’s only fair.”
“The people who are at the same level as you,” Andy replies diplomatically.
“So, Zoe.” He can beat around the bush as much as he likes, but I know the truth. “That’s great.”
“She is as good at her job as you. I just need to work out who will be better at managing people. Old Bill is a great guy and he has kept the operations running smoothly the whole time. He has big s
hoes to fill.”
“I know, and I can do it,” I insist. “I prove myself every single day, Andy.”
I think that we both know I will be kicking up a stink if I don’t get this job. I have been working towards it for a long time and I know that I deserve it. Zoe might be good as well, but I will be better.
“I know that you do, and I see it all the time.” Andy nods knowingly. “Don’t think that your hard work is missed here, because I am very aware of it. But it isn’t just about that. Not at all.”
“So, what else do you need from me?” I practically beg. “Because I want to show you that I can do it. Whatever you need. I might be young, but I am ready for this promotion. I can do this.”
“I’m not doubting you at all. I just have some time to think about it.”
That pisses me off. It really does wind me up because I want him to just tell me that everything that I have put in to this company is worth it. I want to know that I am going to get what I want, what I have been working towards. I’m worth it, and I can do it. I just need the chance to prove myself.
“Well, fine.” I stand back up suddenly. “If you aren’t going to let me have more then I will get back to it.”
“I will let you know what we’re doing as soon as I know…” Andy calls behind me as I walk off.
I head straight towards the bathroom to calm myself down because I really can’t lose my shit in the office again. Not after yesterday, not if I am up for a promotion. I need to spend every moment continuing to prove myself and yelling isn’t a great way to show that I can manage people.
Zoe wouldn’t do this; I tell myself firmly. She probably doesn’t even know about the promotion.
I mean, I didn’t so it’s possible. Even if she is close to Old Bill. And there is a baby in the mix anyway, one that neither of us were expecting, that was conceived months ago. That couldn’t be planned. Plus, it was me who came on to her anyway. She didn’t make the first move. This can’t all be some tactical bullshit. It just can’t.
I make the decision to not believe the rumors, to accept that what me and Zoe have shared is nothing to do with the promotion, just because I can’t believe that about her. I’m not going to get all up my head about it and run something that could potentially be amazing. In fact, what I’m going to do is talk to her about it like a damn grown up. Yes, that’s the right thing to do. Keep on having this open and honest communication. That’s been working for us and I don’t want to stop that now.
Chapter 8 - Zoe
“Don’t you care?” Hannah demands in a sharp tone of voice. I don’t even know why she’s talking to me about this, I thought that she was pissed off with me. But I guess the idea of more gossip has pulled her back in. To be perfectly honest, I would much rather work in a place with less toxic people, but the job is good. “Old Bill is retiring, and you could be running the department. Isn’t that awesome? You’d be a boss.”
I smile and nod. “Yeah, I guess it would be cool. I don’t know why I’m being considered though. There are people who have been here for a lot longer than me. They should get the job, right?”
“Oh, Andy doesn’t work that way. He will give it to the most talented and deserving person.”
“What? And you think that’s me?” I cock a curious eyebrow at Hannah. “Really?”
“Of course.” She shrugs as if this is obvious. “But I’m sure that Wesley will put himself forward for it as well. He likes to think that he’s the best of the best and he will see this as a way to prove that.”
Hmm, that will be interesting. It might well bring out Wesley’s hyper competitive side once more, but I’m sure that after last night things will be different between us. It isn’t going to be just me and him worried about work anymore, is it? We have our up and coming little family to think about. It will be good if either of us get the job, especially if it comes with a pay rise because that will benefit our baby.
“Oh look,” Hannah hisses. “He’s coming over here now and he looks mad. Don’t let him talk you down and put you off the promotion because that’s what he does. He rules the roost with bullying.”
I roll my eyes as Hannah stalks off, but she doesn’t go so far that she can’t hear what’s going on. She will want to gather up every nugget of this conversation so she can use it amuse her throughout the day.
“Hey, Wesley.” I smile openly at him, trying to ignore the expression that Hannah noticed. He does look a little angry. “What’s going on? Have you heard about all the gossip going on today?”
“About Old Bill? Mhmm. I sure have. I have actually just spoken to Andy about it.”
“Oh!” Yep, clearly he is taking this far more seriously than I am. “What did he say?”
“Basically, that it’s between me and you.” He shrugs. “They will open it up to outside candidates as well, but that’s more of a company policy thing. He prefers to promote internally if possible.”
“Well, you will obviously get it.” I grin. “Not only have you been here much longer than me, but you are far more organized and better at dealing with people than I am. So, I guess congratulations are in order.”
But he doesn’t return my happy smile. “I can assure you that it definitely isn’t guaranteed.”
“Er, right.” I tuck a stray strand of hair behind my ear. “Well, I don’t want the promotion. It definitely isn’t really the right time at the moment.” I glance downwards towards my belly. “So, I will step down.”
“Oh no.” He hangs his head low. “No, I’m not going to be one of those guys who is threatened by the success of the woman in his life. That isn’t me. It isn’t that, I just want it so badly, that’s all.”
“If you want it, you have it because I really don’t need the added stress.”
“If I get it, I want to earn it. I want to get it because I’m the right person for the job.”
I don’t know what to say. Right now, I’m confused as to what Wesley wants from me. It doesn’t help that we’re in the office so I can’t exactly be open and honest anyway. I wish that I could find the right words, but they are lost inside of me somewhere. So, all I can really do is to nod as if I get it.
“Urgh, well I better get back to work.” Wesley finally seems to notice that everyone is watching us. It seems like we’re the talk of the office which I half blame Hannah and half blame Old Bill for. Still, at least they are worrying about which one of us is going to get promoted and they aren’t looking any deeper in to me and him.
“Yep, okay. Well I will see you later on then.”
He walks off without answering me which leaves me a little cold and confused. I know that we haven’t yet made any specific plans to meet up tonight, but we are going to, aren’t we? Especially now when we have so much to talk about. I refuse to just sit back and wait to see what he’s going to do. I’m not the sort of woman who will just leave it and let him make all of the choices. He must know that about me. I don’t know what sort of woman he is accustomed to, but I refuse to change for anyone. If my Grandma, and my failed engagement, has taught me anything, it’s that. I am always going to be myself no matter what.
I grab my cell phone out of my bag and massage him, asking him to come to mine for dinner tonight. I don’t want us to have this weird atmosphere between us because of work, that isn’t right. Not when we have finally gotten to a good place with our personal life. Particularly over a promotion that I don’t even want.
It takes a while, but he finally messages back and agrees to come over, which I decide to take as a good sign. Whatever the hell is going on, we can sort it out tonight. I’m pretty sure that we can overcome everything.
Knock, knock. The sound of someone arriving makes me nervous. Genuinely fearful. I don’t think that I have ever been so flooded with anticipation before, but there is just something about Wesley that makes me feel this way. Before I can even rush to the door, I have to check my appearance one more. Knock, knock.
“Coming!” But as I tug the door open with
a smile on my face, it isn’t Wesley. It’s the take out delivery guy with the food I have ordered for tonight. It isn’t me cheating, I am going to be honest, I just haven’t had the time to get anything cooked. It has been one hell of a manic day. “Oh right, thank you.”
I take the bags and pay, but just as I am about to close the door, I see a familiar face grinning at me. It’s Wesley, but he doesn’t look like himself right now. He’s in a blood red tee shirt and jeans rather than his usual uniform of a suit. I have to admit this change in him is sexy as hell. He’s really hot all casual.
“Wesley.” I extend my arms out to him. “Come inside. How are you?”
“Good,” he replies, thankfully looking much more relaxed than he did before. It seems that he has left the stress of work behind him which is good because I don’t really want it to be a problem. “You look nice.”
“Oh, thank you,” I shoot back with a coy smile. He leans down and kisses me softly on the lips as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. The funny thing is it actually feels that way. “So do you.”
He comes inside and waits in the kitchen patiently while I get all the food plated up for the pair of us. He’s leaning against the counter looking sexy as hell, causing bolts of anxiety all the way through me. I want to be cool and calm, so he doesn’t see me freaking out, but I don’t know if I’m pulling it off.
“I love Chinese food.” He inhales deeply. “Thank you for sorting this for us.”
“I know. You always order the same thing when we stay late and Andy orders for us.” I laugh and send a wink a wink his way. “So, I knew that I would at least be on the safe side to order all of this.”
“You noticed?” He smiles at me. “I never knew that you were looking at me.”
“Don’t flatter yourself. I notice everyone.” I roll my eyes. “I don’t know why, I just do.”
Actually, I do know why. I’m an observer because I haven’t ever felt like I am on the inside, so it’s become a part of my nature. But I don’t exactly need to get in to that with Wesley. He doesn’t need to see the sadder parts of me that I prefer to keep hidden away from the rest of the world.