Tender Torment

by Jane Archer

  Alexandra turned around to see the girl throw herself against Jake, sobbing, clutching at him.

  Alexandra met Jake's eyes, turning crimson as he regarded her with amusement. Lamar stood away from the group, reluctant to join the fight.

  "Do your words mean you're not willing to share me, Alex?" Jake asked as his hands pushed Rosa from him.

  "Oh, no!" Alexandra cried, furious that he should have heard her threat, and embarrassed as well.

  Rosa fought Jake's strong hands to regain her position against his chest, pushing her bare breasts toward him, tempting him, begging him to take her.

  "Jake, Jake, this woman has hurt me. Just look what she has done to my blouse," Rosa said, her head back, to better reveal her full breasts.

  "Yes, I see," Jake said wryly, looking down at the two twin mounds arched towards him. "You do seem to have a problem, Rosa." And he pulled the torn fabric over her breasts. She pressed against him again.

  "Jake, Jake, send her away. You don't need that gringa woman. I'm warm. I'm yours. You wanted me before. Take me again."

  Jake looked down at her, then back at Alexandra, as if making a choice. Watching Alexandra's rising fury, he smiled, his teeth a startling white against his tanned face. He raised his hand and cupped Rosa's chin, gazing down at her pleading face.

  "Leave, Rosa. I suppose I belong to the victor and Alex seems to be the winner."

  Broiling with rage, Rosa stormed out of the hacienda, and Alexandra, humiliated and herself enraged, followed her out of the room and locked herself in her bedroom.

  In the days that followed, Jake did not let Alexandra forget the incident for he found it amusing, especially since it was sure to raise Alexandra's temper. He told her many times how she had to take good care of him since she'd won him in a fight and promised to mar any woman who tried to steal him. Alexandra had no retort for this. She still could not believe she had been crazy enough to say those words. But for some reason that she couldn't understand, it had helped make Jake and her closer.

  He was even teaching her to shoot, for as he'd told her one day, "As often as you need to defend yourself, Alex, I'd better teach you how to shoot. Someday I might not be around to save you from the lusts of other men."

  He also thought that was funny, but after the incident with Pecos, he always made sure that at least one cowboy was near the hacienda when he was away. Even that was cause for his humor and teasing. He told her that all the cowboys could hardly work for pining over the beautiful Alexandra. It was true that whichever cowboy was left at the hacienda was forever trying to help her in the kitchen, or with the washing or cleaning. Of course, they were more trouble than help, but they did it with such good humor and delight that she'd usually let them haul water, or bring firewood in for her. And Jake didn't seem to be so jealous of them, although he kept a close eye on her and her attitude with them. It was all perfectly innocent and they treated her like a great lady.

  The days slipped by easily, one into the other, until she realized that it had been three weeks since she'd arrived in Texas. She was made very aware of the time by something she could not ignore. Alexandra could no longer deny the fact that she was pregnant.

  Her time had come and gone, a month since New Orleans. She knew the child was Jake's. Should she tell him? What would he do? Oh, why did it have to happen now, of all times? But it wasn't her fault. Jake had continued to take her every night, as if it was his due.

  She paced the patio, trying to think, trying to reason. The baby should have a father. She couldn't give birth to an illegitimate child. That wouldn't be fair to the helpless baby. If Jake loved her, then it would be different, but he didn't. He didn't seem to hate her any more and he had even questioned her about her past, wanting to know everything, especially about New Orleans, but she'd been stubborn. After he'd rejected her story originally, she'd not told him another word. Now she wished she hadn't been so proud.

  There was a sound in the house. Alexandra looked up to see Jake walking toward her, a frown puckering his forehead. She caught her breath. It was mid-morning, and he was never home at this time of day.

  "Jake?"

  "Everything's all right, Alex. I came back to talk with you. Can I sit a minute?"

  She looked at him, concerned. She rarely saw him this serious.

  Jake turned a chair around, pushed his sombrero back, then let his intense blue eyes fall on her.

  He reminded her of the time in the cabin of The Flying J when she'd first talked with him, not knowing what to expect. She felt that same way now.

  "What am I going to do with you, Alex?" he asked slowly.

  "What do you mean, Jake?"

  "The herd will be ready to leave for San Antonio in two days."

  "I'm glad. I know that's what you want," she said, trying to keep her fears from her eyes. "Jake, before you go on, there's something I'd like to tell you."

  His eyes grew more intense, focusing on her full. "Go ahead."

  "Well, I've been stubborn. I want you to know about me. I should have told you before—when you asked."

  "It's been up to you, Alex. I am curious. You just don't act much like a whore. I can't figure you."

  "Oh, Jake, I'm no harlot. You see, the men, well, it really wasn't my fault. I was raped the first time, just as I told you. The second was by Captain Sully on his ship."

  "Alex, I don't want to know about the men."

  "Yes, damn you, you're going to hear. You've been condemning me ever since we met. Well, now you're going to hear the facts. I'm Alexandra Clarke. Your grandfather in New York City was my guardian. He raised me after my parents were killed, after you and your mother left him. When he died, he asked me to find you and Eleanor in New Orleans. So I hired Captain Sully and his schooner. You know what happened there. He raped me and was going to let his crew have me. I jumped overboard. You saved me."

  "Christ! Alex, stop this."

  "No, I want you to hear it, all of it. You took me to New Orleans. You frightened me. Our, our lovemaking frightened me. I was so inexperienced. I escaped. I, I somehow got on to Gallatin Street."

  "Good lord, Alexandra," Jake cried, standing up and pacing as he ran his fingers through his golden hair.

  "Yes, Gallatin. Rather stupid of me, but I didn't know—not at first. Three sailors raped me—they also paid me."

  "I don't want to hear this, Alex," he said once more, his voice deadly quiet as he sat down again.

  "I was desperate. I walked the street, trying to get out, but a man carried me into a dance house. I was raped again by a bouncer."

  "Oh God," Jake moaned, hunched over, his face in his hands. "If I'd only known."

  "The next day I was sent to Madame LeBlanc. I only sang and played the piano there, Jake, please believe me. That last night they gave me something in the champagne and Giles took me. It was the only way he could get me."

  "And to think what I believed! That damned Bella and her tricks. She set it up, and Giles too. I see it all now." He paused, staring at her intently. "I'm sorry, Alex, can you ever forgive me?" he said in a pain-filled voice.

  Alexandra looked deeply into his eyes. He did believe her. She smiled. "Yes, Jake, I can. They fooled us both. I suppose they were jealous, and then they wanted the money."

  "Money?"

  "I, I'm an heiress, Jake."

  He laughed. "You mean I'm breaking my back over these damned longhorns when you've got a fortune?"

  She let her long lashes cover her eyes. "You'd want my money?"

  "Hell, Alex, you know me better than that. I don't give a damn about your money. It's yours, keep it. A lot of good it's done you so far."

  She opened her eyes wide, the green depths softening. "Giles took me to the plantation. I stayed with Eleanor until she died. It was her lungs. She didn't want you to stay with her."

  Jake got up again and paced. "I knew she'd been sick, but she should have told me. I'd have stayed. The ranch could have waited."

  "She knew that, Jake
, but she wanted you to go on with your life. She loved you very much."

  "It all could have waited."

  "She wanted me to tell you that she loved you and that she was happy at the last to have me with her and to know that her father had loved and forgiven her, as well as you. That's partly why he sent me—to tell you that he loved you and that he'd been a stupid old man."

  Jake smiled. "I wish I could have known him better. I wish Mother had stayed with him."

  "Jake, Eleanor gave me this," Alexandra said, pulling the medallion out of her blouse and up over her head to show Jake. She held it out to him. "I believe it really belongs to you."

  Jake crossed over to her, then looked down at the medallion. "She gave that to you?"

  "Yes, she looked upon me as her daughter."

  "Then keep it. If she wanted you to have it, then it's yours," he said, closing her fingers over it. He sat back down and watched her intently, his blue eyes hard.

  "After your mother died I came here because I'd promised her I would and also because Giles was trying to force me to marry him. I thought I would be safer here. Ebba left the plantation with me, but she went up north when I came here.

  "I'm no whore, Jake."

  His eyes held hers for a long moment, then he said, "No, you're not, but damn it, Alex, in bed you're sure no lady."

  Alexandra's eyes widened, then she laughed. He looked at her in surprise, then they both laughed together.

  Finally Alexandra said, "Well, damn it, Jake, in bed you're no gentlemen."

  He shook his head. "I don't know, Alex. You've got me in such a lather. Do you want to go home? Do you want to stay in San Antonio? I can't take you on the trail drive, it would be impossible."

  "Then, when you go, you'll leave me somewhere," she said coldly, her heart beating faster as she waited for his reply.

  "All right, if that's the way you want it, Alex," he said just as coldly.

  Alexandra stood up, knowing that he wouldn't send her away if he loved her. She could never tell him about their child now.

  Her face a mask to hide her emotions, she said, "Very well, Jake. My promises to Olaf and Eleanor have been completed so nothing holds me here any longer. I'll go with you as far as San

  Antonio, then we'll part company."

  She looked at him quickly, then stepped around him and through the door.

  "Alex?" he called but it was too late. She had grabbed her hat and hurried outside. She heard Jake calling, but ignored him as she quickly mounted her horse and struck out on her own, riding hard and fast away from the hacienda, away from Jake.

  Jake! Jake! her heart cried out as she rode. Now that the cattle were ready to drive, he was willing to throw her away, discard her. How could she ever have thought that she could win his heart. She was a fool! She would leave him and never return. And he would never know about his child. Never! Once they parted ways in San Antonio, he'd never see her again.

  Chapter 22

  Alexandra continued to ride away from the hacienda, determined to outdistance her anger, her hurt, her discontent, and slowed only when her mustang began to tire.

  Soon the coolness of sunset descended and as the wind whipped against her face, she pushed her hat back so that it was held only by the leather thong around her neck. She felt exhilarated with the wind in her hair and the strong pony beneath her.

  She found that she'd grown to feel a part of Texas in the weeks she'd lived there and no matter how furious she was with Jake, she still loved the Bar J, the life on a ranch. She would almost hate to leave it, but leave it she must. Jake no longer wanted her and so she had to make a life for herself and her child somewhere else.

  Suddenly, her pony snorted, shying. She looked up, alarmed. She'd come to depend on the instincts of her mustang. Not far away was a group of men riding toward the Bar J herd. Rustlers? Had they seen her? She pulled the mustang quickly to a stop and watched the riders.

  They hadn't seen her for they rode straight ahead, intent on their destination. She could see them start to round up Jake's herd. No matter how she felt about Jake, she wouldn't let anything happen to the ranch and the cowboys if she could help it.

  Jerking the mustang around, she flicked her lightly with the reins. She had to warn Jake and Lamar. Her pony seemed to understand the urgency and was soon running swiftly back toward the hacienda. Alexandra held on tightly, urging her mount, unaware of the brush and mesquite that tore at her clothing in her desperation to warn the Bar J.

  At last, the hacienda was in sight and she pulled the heavily breathing mustang to a quick stop in front of it, her own breath coming in gasps, her hair blown loose and billowing out around her like golden fire with the last rays of the sun striking it, her clothes torn and her body scratched from the brush.

  Before she could jump down, Jake was beside her, helping her down. "Jake! Rustlers! A group of men riding for the herd. They aren't far away. I saw—"

  "Hell! You're sure, Alex?"

  She nodded at Jake and then noticed the saddled ponies in front of the hacienda, several of the cowboys standing around, and then Lamar, a worried frown puckering his face.

  "I'm sure, but what's going on here?"

  Jake grinned sheepishly, then said, "We were about to go in search of you. I told Lamar that we'd wait until sundown, and if you weren't back by then—"

  "I can take care of myself, Jake. I always have," Alexandra said, cutting him off coldly before turning toward Lamar. "What can we do?"

  Lamar had motioned to the cowboys the instant he'd heard the news, and they now stood close by, ready for orders.

  "Jake?" he asked, anxious to move.

  "Got to head them off. If they stampede the herd, we're lost. Lamar, you warn the boys on watch. Have them ready in case we can't stop the rustlers. I'll take these men and try to stop them. Take Alexandra with you. I don't want her left here alone."

  "No! I want to be in on it. I can use a gun," she said stubbornly, determined not to be left out.

  "Damn it, Alex. Go with Lamar. I'm not going to have you along."

  "Well, I'm going," she said, climbing back on her pony.

  Jake glared at her, but he didn't have time to argue.

  In a few minutes, they had reached the herd. They all stopped their mounts. The animals shied, sensing the impending danger. Alexandra held her horse close to Jake's. These men wouldn't get off lightly if they dared to test Jake, she thought, glancing up at his stern, hard profile.

  She looked back toward the rustlers, coming closer now. They were galloping, having seen Jake waiting for them. When they were close, Alexandra instantly recognized their leader— Pecos! Revenge? Hate? The banditos brought their horses to a halt a few feet from Jake's group of cowboys, then Pecos walked his pony closer.

  "Gringo, you have come to welcome us?"

  "What are you doing on the Bar J, Pecos? I thought I told you to stay away."

  "There's a little matter unsettled between us," he said as his black eyes flicked over Alexandra, insolently.

  "There's nothing to settle between us."

  "No? Your herd. It is very fine. It is ready for the drive. The cattle are nervous, verdad? They are ready to move. If a sudden sound, or an accidental shot was fired into the herd—"

  "Don't threaten me, Pecos," Jake said, his voice hard.

  "Threaten? Me?" Pecos asked innocently, his palms turned up as he expressed his innocence.

  "Take your boys, Pecos, and get off Bar J land now! Don't come back, or you won't get off so easily next time."

  "Gladly. We came only for the pretty señorita.

  We would have her for a time—to settle old scores, then she would be returned, only a little used," he said, chuckling deep in his throat. His men laughed behind him, their rough, loud voices harsh in the evening air.

  Alexandra sat very still, her face a mask revealing nothing. She would not show fear, whatever Jake did, whatever happened to her. She had lived through a lot and she would survive this night, to
o.

  "You're beginning to anger me, Pecos," Jake drawled, his hand lowering to his gun.

  "Am I? I cannot understand this, gringo. I merely came for the woman," Pecos said, his own hand dropping toward his gun.

  "The woman's mine, Pecos,"

  "So, you will have the fight, hombre?"

  And then the world seemed to explode into a horror of belching guns, cursing men and plunging horses. Alexandra heard Jake holler, "Get to Lamar, Alex. Warn the others!"

  She wheeled her pony as she saw several men fall from their mustangs, only to begin fighting on foot for the two groups had merged into one struggling, panting, fighting mass of desperation. She could not discern Jake from the others and she couldn't tell how many were dead, or wounded. She pushed her pony on, away from the scene of death and blood and toward the restless herd, toward the others who must be warned.

  She galloped furiously up to the chuck wagon, pulling her pony to an abrupt stop in front.

  Cookie rushed out, a long gun in his hands, and said, "Lord, Miss Alexandra, thought you were the rustlers. Almost shot you."

  "Cookie, where's Lamar?"

  "Out with the herd."

  "I must warn the others. It's Pecos and his ban-ditos. They're fighting with Jake and the cowboys. I don't know what—oh no! Look! The barns are on fire. Oh, Cookie!"

  The dark night had suddenly exploded into bright lights and leaping flames coming from the direction of the hacienda. Alexandra felt a small fury grow in her breast. So—Pecos had brought two groups: one for the hacienda and one for the herd!

  "What will we do, Cookie?"

  "Look, miss, Jake'll take care of those banditos. You warn Lamar and I'll come with you. Then we'll see if we can save the hacienda, if it ain't already too late."

  Alexandra and Cookie told Lamar what was happening, they rode as close to the hacienda as they dared. Cookie checked the gun on his hip, then jerked his rifle from its saddle sheath. He nodded at Alexandra and they ran, crouching low, toward the hacienda. The barn, bunkhouse and outbuildings were already ablaze, but Alexandra was relieved to see that the hacienda was as yet undamaged. They ran on until they were close to the hacienda. Loud voices came from inside and Alexandra leaped forward, determined to stop the banditos, but Cookie grabbed her roughly and pulled her back into the shadows.