Heart of the Wild

by Rita Hestand

  "To find him, of course."

  "What for?"

  "To tell him exactly what I think of him."

  "Good girl," John suddenly smiled into her eyes and let her go.

  Tanka and Gina smiled at each other, knowingly.

  And Rosie, who was sitting in Corky's lap, laughed aloud, "I knew it. I knew I was right about that one. It's a boomerang. That's what it is."

  John Douglas looked at Rosie and smiled. "Rosie, old girl, I think you just hit the nail on the head."

  Return to Contents

  * * *

  Chapter Thirteen

  The cabin was surrounded in darkness when she arrived. Kasie slowed the new jeep to a crawl as she glanced about. Most of the snow had begun to melt, and it looked entirely different now. Not that it had been so long ago. There was a light mist in the air.

  Kasie knocked on the door, but there was no answer. The thud of her fist made a lonesome sound in the night, like the dull thudding of her heart as she realized she had somehow missed Amory.

  Dear God, had she traveled half the night, and he wasn't here? She sighed heavily, cursed under her breath, stomped one foot and turned to get back into the jeep.

  "You know you cuss too much? And that stomping has definitely got to stop," came a voice from the edge of the forest, as she was about to put her foot up to the jeep. She stepped down, and looked about.

  It was only a shadow, but a big shadow, one she recognized easily, standing against a tree, smoking a cheroot. She took one step closer to the shadow.

  "And you smoke too much."

  "So we both have bad habits," he said with a curious smile.

  "Y--yes,"

  Then suddenly she noticed a dark shadow beside him. She moved closer and then squealed aloud. "It's the lab, isn't it?"

  "That's why I was late getting in, I stopped off at Homer's and picked him up. Decided I needed a little companionship. It seems a little lonelier up here now."

  "Oh," she murmured and backed away, "he's beautiful."

  "I thought I'd call him Brat."

  "That's mean."

  "Oh, I don't know. I'm rather fond of the word. What would you call him?"

  She stammered a moment, then crunching down in a squat position, she petted the animal and smiled, "I'd call him Blackie."

  "I like Brat better."

  She shrugged, and stood up again. "He's your dog."

  Amory nodded, and took him to the cellar. "Here's a bone for you, Brat. Now you stay put until I can get your feed and water and a rug for you in the house."

  "You're not going to leave him out here in the cold, are you?"

  "For a little while, yes." He glanced at her, his eyes raking her with one glance. "You know you're very sensitive to the wilderness, aren't you Kasie? In fact, you are sensitive to everything around you, except maybe me. But animals and nature especially. You like it here, don't you?"

  "Sensitive? Like it here?" she repeated.

  A long silence prevailed, and Kasie began to pace about, not sure whether to just leave or have it out with Amory.

  "So why'd you come?" he finally asked.

  When she didn't answer, he moved to go past her. "Look, it's getting late, you should be home packing."

  "Should I?" she challenged.

  He was at the front door, unlocking it, but glanced over his shoulder. "Yes."

  "You were getting even all the time, weren't you?" she demanded, stomping her foot into the ground without thinking.

  He turned around and looked at her, "You've got a bad habit of doing that."

  "Doing what?" she asked with impatience.

  "Stomping your foot, like a child."

  "Amory!"

  "My name is Chay! Say it!" he demanded, as he came closer. He was right in front of her. Those bedroom eyes seem to sizzle. She felt herself weakening in his presence.

  "Chay!" she managed in a small voice, as other emotions began to take hold of her. His eyes seemed to devour her, but his words didn't acknowledge her. She couldn't think straight with him this close.

  "Better," he said with a grin, lifting her chin so the moonlight shone in her face. "That's much better. And yes, I guess I'm a little guilty in that regard. I deliberately planned that moment at the Inn. Right down to the nail, Kasie. You've got me dead to rights. I wanted some strange kind of revenge for the torture you've put me through. I thought it would be sweet. I thought it would wipe you right out of mind and heart."

  She gasped.

  "Now, did you ever ask yourself why I might have done it?"

  "Because you loathe me. You wanted me to hurt--like I hurt you."

  "No, I never loathed you." He almost turned away, then glanced at her again. "I wanted to knock some sense into your head. Shock you. But why, Kasie? Why does anyone want revenge?"

  "Be--because I hurt you," she heard herself admit, the air rushing out of her lungs.

  "Right again, sweetheart. You stole my heart eight years ago. You took all my dreams away. I was crazy in love with you, but like a jug head, I couldn't tell you. Pride, fear of rejection, stupidity. I didn't know then what I do know now."

  She looked deep into his eyes, searching. "You should have said something. You never--"

  "I know." His voice grew distant as he turned away, his shoulders tensing. "You were so damn young though, and it all happened so fast. I wasn't sure you'd believe me."

  "I don't know. Maybe if we had talked about our feelings a little more. Dad was a wonderful man, but he didn't know much about raising a girl. I knew very little about being a woman, and I've got to admit that was part of the reason I ran away was because I wasn't sure of myself. I didn't think I could be enough woman for you. I wasn't ready for marriage." She glanced at him sadly. "So now, your revenge is complete. I'm in love with you." She cried, a tear slipping down her cheek. "You asked me to marry you, asked my father for my hand, but you never said the words. And now--"

  He turned around, hearing the hurt in her voice, seeing the truth in her eyes, and he gathered her against him. "Don't you see, Kasie? You never believed in those words until now."

  Her mouth flew open, and he suddenly covered it with his own. "God, how I've wanted you, Kasie. Missed you," he muttered raggedly against her lips. A wild unleashed kiss sweeping away doubts, full of old hurts, new joys, and a promise.

  When his lips moved against her cheek, he uttered the words she had so longed to hear. "I do love you, Kasie, I always have. And I always will."

  "I'd hoped, I wanted--to believe, but my father had done most of the arranging in my life back then. I couldn't even think for myself. When I heard him talking about wanting you in the family as his son-in-law. I thought the wedding was all his idea. I couldn't face you. But, I've done a little growing up since I've been here," she said slowly, keeping her eyes closed as he continued to kiss her nose, her eyes her cheeks, her chin, and finally her lips again.

  "Yes, I guess you have at that. And a little forgiving, too." He finally whispered as he held her tightly in his arms.

  "Yes--."

  "And love, Kasie?"

  "Love is an emotion that hurts most of the time. It's so elusive you're never sure if it's there. It's like the emotions I feel about my parents. It's there, but it's so vague, sometimes. I'll admit I'm afraid of it. Afraid to be too happy. Oddly enough, it was my mother that taught me that. I love her so, and I'm not sure she's ever noticed. I wanted her to forgive me for choosing to live with dad. It wasn't that I loved one more than the other, it was that I liked his lifestyle better. And I guess I'm as guilty as you, I never told her."

  "I'm sorry, sweetheart, I never really realized what a girl must go through, especially without a mother there to help her."

  "She was so beautiful, so talented, and so unapproachable. I knew love existed, I saw it in other people. My father loved me, but he's a busy man. He never took time for love. I'm just afraid of it. Afraid of never having it for my own."

  "It doesn't have to hurt--if you g
ive into it a little. And you've had it for a long time, sweetheart. I'm just sorry I never told you in so many words before. I thought it was the Indian in me that kept you so removed from me."

  "Chayton, I never dreamed that's what you thought. You must have thought that's why I left. I think being Indian is wonderful. It's the most romantic heritage a person can have."

  Chayton stared into her eyes, and a slow burning smile crept upon his face. "You know, a man doesn't seek revenge when he doesn't feel anything. I didn't want to marry you because of your father. In spite of, not because of. In fact, in the beginning I fought the urge to even ask you." He shook her in his arms and smiled into her questioning face. "I fell in love with a naive little tomboy. Crazy in love. I'll admit I was afraid to touch you back then, but only because my hormones were raging out of control."

  "But I was such a mess back then, such a tomboy, how could you possibly love me like that? Mother said men don't love tomboys, they feel sorry for them."

  "You were beauty and innocence rolled into one. I loved your spirit for life, your love of nature, everything about you, Kasie. Not just the way you look on the outside, but the way you look on the inside. I wasn't out to buy a package. I wanted you, the girl I fell in love with."

  "And now--."

  "I still can't keep my hands off you. We wouldn't even be having this conversation now, if Tanka and Gina hadn't showed up. We'd be married by now."

  It was all she needed for courage. A slow invading smile formed on her lips as his expression softened on her, and he began to pull her slowly into his waiting arms. Deliberately, her arms floated up and around his neck, and she pulled his head down to meet hers. "Oh, Chay," she barely whispered, just before their lips met in a steamy kiss that threatened to melt the rest of the snow. This was where she belonged.

  He pulled away enough to look into her eyes, his expression serious, contemplating. "But Kasie, can you handle living here in this wilderness, alone for days at a time? I don't have many luxuries here, like you are used to. My business is just now starting to show a real profit. I might be gone half the time."

  "Handle it? I love it here, just the way it is." She looked around her, then at him. "In the city you have to worry about burglary, rape, murder, car theft. The worst thing that can happen here is an ornery old bear."

  "You left out kidnapping." He winked. "Kasie, I want no more doubts in your mind about how I feel. Besides, as much as I care about your father, I don't want him having the upper hand on me. I wouldn't pull such a stunt for anyone else."

  "I do love you, Chayton. How I love you." She kissed the big powerful hands that held her. "I don't understand why it's so easy to say now, but it's true. I'm not afraid anymore."

  It was all the reassurance he needed as a slow invading smile warmed her heart.

  "Thanks for keeping Ole Blue's story quiet." she whispered as his lips trailed down her neck in a tempting manner, and she lifted the delicate necklace for him to see. In the center of the glass was Ole Blue's hair. "It's the sweetest gift I've ever received."

  "Some things are private, between two people. The way you fell in love with Ole Blue made me want you all the more. Lord, I wanted you when I came back that day and found you chopping wood, too. It sounds a little crazy but you reminded me of my mother. She was a beautifully stubborn woman, too. Dad and her fought every day. But even I knew it was a good kind of fighting." His voice grew throaty as his eyes devoured her. Then slowly, his hands began to thread through the long silky strands of her hair in a caressing manner, while his lips tantalized.

  "I was scared to come up here. And scared not to."

  "It was a gamble I took. There was no need to worry though, sweetheart. I realized driving back that I couldn't leave you down there. I wanted to give you some thinking time. I'd have been back. Why were you scared, sweetheart?"

  "I thought this was the way you might have planned the revenge, to hurt me. To make me want you and throw it in my face. I wouldn't have blamed you. It was a gamble I had to take. It was my last chance to erase all the bad between us."

  He looked deep into her eyes, and shook her gently, "There is no bad between us. All love is different. Just because we know what we want now, doesn't mean the fighting will end. It won't. I hate to tell you this, but I've enjoyed every skirmish, and it's deepened my respect for you, too. But at least now I'll look forward to it. Don't ever be afraid of me, sweetheart. I'd never hurt you."

  "I know," she sighed, her lips finding his once more. "As long as you love me, I'll never hurt again."

  "Is a lifetime long enough?" He pulled away once more after a long, drugging kiss. "I'll kill that Springer if he ever touches you again. I knew he had, you didn't have to tell me. And I wanted to go down there like a caveman and knock his block off. That's why I was so determined to keep you here. I'd never let you go back to him. I would have given you until morning to come to me, maybe. Then I would have stormed back down there and carried you off again."

  "How were you going to stop me?"

  "Easy, kidnapping really isn't that hard, you know. I think I've got the knack of it now. Oh God, there's always been too many clothes between us," he grumbled lowly after another earth-shattering kiss.

  "Funny," she purred in his arms. "I never noticed. When I'm in your arms, I feel there's nothing between us."

  Suddenly, in one lithe movement he lifted her up, and carried her through the open doorway of the cabin. His boot heel kicked the door shut behind them. "I think I better tell you right now, I want lots of babies. A whole houseful. I want to fill this place with love and family. I want what my parents had, what we can have, Kasie."

  "Me, too," she said, with a full-blown smile as her lips found his once more. "I only wish I could have met them."

  "They would have loved you. And kicked me for being so insensitive. I guess we'll have to settle on building our own little brood."

  "Wanna start now," she murmured for his ears only.

  "Oh, Kasie," he shuddered with the unspoken needs of a man too long without his woman.

  Gently he laid her against the softness of his bed, and looked down into her sea-green eyes, "You better find a preacher fast, sweetheart. Because I've had about all I can stand of being a gentleman around you. Besides, this is a marrying bed."

  Her eyes roamed the room, "Before Tanka and Gina showed up. Why did you stop me?"

  He made a funny sound in his throat and a face. "It was the first signal I had that my plan for revenge wouldn't work. I loved you too much to compromise you like that. Hell, I wasn't about to settle for just your body. I wanted you!"

  "Chayton," she opened her arms to him again, then glanced about the cabin. Strange, but it was lit with tiny candles, and the bed had been turned back. There was a bottle of wine on the table and a rose, too. "Expecting someone?"

  "Only you."

  "Pretty sure of yourself, weren't you?" She tested.

  "'Bout time, wouldn't you say? Now," he murmured, as he chucked his jacket, and began peeling hers away. "I like talking, but I'm a man of action. I won't compromise you completely, I'll save the best for our honeymoon, but a few kisses aren't going to be enough, that much I can tell you right now."

  She giggled with delight. "Don't worry, Dad's on his way, and I let him know he'd better bring a preacher," she sighed happily, pulling him into her waiting arms, knowing at long last she was home, and that their marriage was taking place right now, in her heart--for he had kidnapped her heart so very long ago, and that she had captured the heart of the wild!

  THE END

  Return to Contents

  * * *

 

 

 
; -ms-filter: grayscale(100%); filter: grayscale(100%); " class="sharethis-inline-share-buttons">share