Sister Dear

by Laura McNeill

  “Did you think I hadn’t heard?” Maddie knit her brow and almost sputtered the sentence, her voice just an octave above a whisper. Her face reddened and she rolled her eyes.

  Caroline sucked in a breath. She’d expected disappointment from Maddie, but not necessarily anger.

  “We’re supposed to be friends. Best friends. And you let me go on thinking I’d done something wrong?” Maddie stared at Caroline as if she were a specimen under a microscope. Bacteria. Something contagious.

  “You have to believe me. It wasn’t what I’d meant to happen,” Caroline struggled to explain. “I couldn’t talk to anyone.”

  “You don’t trust me.” Maddie traced the line of the desk with one finger.

  Caroline shifted closer, trying to get Maddie to look at her. “I didn’t know how to tell you. I’ve been sick about it. Every day. I haven’t talked to anyone.”

  But Maddie ignored that she’d said anything. Her eyes were icy blue, frozen over. “After all this time I’ve had your back,” she hissed and finally glared in Caroline’s direction.

  Stung by Maddie’s reaction, Caroline slid back in her seat and jerked her eyes away, willing herself not to break down.

  She swallowed hard with the realization that—right or wrong—she’d crossed the line with Maddie. Maddie, who lived to be the first to know everything, who prided herself on creating and controlling gossip with their circle of friends, and the entire school, for that matter. She operated, more than a bit, through fear and intimidation.

  “I’m sorry,” Caroline apologized, knowing it wasn’t enough.

  Maddie turned her head slowly and gave Caroline a sidelong glance. “It’s too late.” She paused. “And what you did to Jake’s Mercedes after he broke up with you? Cutting up the leather seats? Tearing up the ragtop? That’s not just juvenile . . . You destroyed his car.”

  Blood rushed to Caroline’s cheeks. “What? I-I didn’t!” Heads turned all around them at her exclamation.

  But instead of making things better, the denial only served to fuel Maddie’s fiery mood. She set her jaw and crossed her arms. “Really? So I suppose you don’t know anything about keying the sides of the car or the slashed tires either?”

  “I would never,” Caroline sputtered.

  “I’m beginning to think you were never really my friend.” Maddie scrunched up her shoulders and narrowed her eyes.

  “That’s not true,” Caroline pleaded.

  Maddie sniffed and turned her head away.

  Caroline shrunk down in her seat, trying desperately to hold back tears. She dug her fingernails into the soft part of her arm, focusing on the pain. She started shaking. She wouldn’t lose it. She couldn’t. Not in front of Maddie, God, and everyone at school.

  With all of the strength left inside her body, Caroline focused on breathing in and out. She stared at a mark on her desk and tried not to think about anything other than existing. Surviving.

  When the bell rang, Maddie stalked off.

  Caroline sat still and let everyone in the room file out first. When every seat was empty, she got to her feet. For a split second, her thoughts flitted to her mother. Was this how she felt? Alone? In a corner? Like everyone hated her?

  In a fog, Caroline pushed the thoughts away and stumbled to her locker. She put her hand on the lock and dialed the combination. Her fingers fumbled with the numbers on the dial. She couldn’t make them work. Finally, on the fourth try, the lock released and swung free.

  Breathe, Caroline reminded herself. Just get through the day.

  Maddie and all of her friends didn’t understand the kind of pressure she was under. Neither did Jake. How could they? If anyone else’s parents screwed up, they did it behind closed doors. Drinking, affairs, gambling. None of them were arrested and thrown in prison. Those names weren’t splashed in huge letters all over the local newspaper. Their parents weren’t on TV being shouted at by reporters. They weren’t ignored and ridiculed.

  And despite being upset, even angry, Caroline would never destroy someone’s car.

  As she yanked open the locker, rattling the thin metal door, the bell rang. Caroline would be late for class. The hallway emptied, doors closing like dominoes falling in a row. Another locker door slammed. Shoes clicked, staccato, on the tile. Caroline grabbed her textbook and hugged the weight to her chest, trying to slow her racing heart. Eyes drilled forward, she ducked into Spanish class and slid into her seat.

  At the disruption, her teacher grimaced, clapped her hands, and called the class back to order. Caroline flipped open her textbook, turning page after page. She clenched and unclenched her fists, picked up her pen, then glanced at the clock. Faster, she urged silently. Tick, tock. Tick, tock.

  She sunk down in her chair, forced her fingers to write. Muchas gracias. Thank you very much. Socorro! Help!

  Caroline bent her head and concentrated. No entiendo. I don’t understand.

  That was for sure.

  Caroline jumped when her cell buzzed in her pocket. She shifted in her chair, and as quickly as she could, drew out the phone, silencing the vibration. But as Caroline started to slip her phone into her backpack, she couldn’t help herself. After a moment, she looked at the screen and the text from a number she didn’t recognize.

  You missed our ice-cream date. Want to try for Saturday?

  It was Russell.

  He’d remembered.

  NINETEEN

  EMMA

  2016

  For ten minutes that morning, Caroline had hovered around the sink, rearranging cups and emptying the dishwasher. When the clinking and banging didn’t stop, Emma wandered into the kitchen, set down her coffee, and interrupted. “Hey, sweetie. What’s up?”

  At the sound of her aunt’s voice, Caroline jumped. After catching her breath, she turned around and leaned against the counter. “Hey, did you hear someone messed with Jake’s car?”

  Emma frowned, tamping down her internal satisfaction. “I had, as a matter of fact. His was one of a row of them in their neighborhood. The cops think some kids came through and vandalized them around three o’clock in the morning.”

  “Oh.” Caroline’s eyes had grown wide. “I had . . . no idea.”

  “Yeah, crazy, right?” Emma added, picking up her mug to take a sip and hide her smile of satisfaction.

  Caroline frowned. “I-I’ll bet he’s furious.”

  “Some people get what’s coming to them,” Emma added sharply, stirring sugar into her cup.

  “Well, Maddie actually thought I had something to do with it.” Caroline gulped, her eyes misting.

  Nearly choking, Emma sloshed her coffee on the table, spots of liquid splattering like dark raindrops. “What in the world?” She narrowed her eyes as she reached for a napkin to catch the drips.

  “Yeah.” Caroline shrugged. “She’s not really talking to me.”

  Emma hesitated, steadying her anger. Now she would have to set Maddie straight. The girl wouldn’t bother Caroline again when she was through with her. “I have a feeling that Maddie has found out by now that you didn’t have anything to do with it, Caro.”

  “Really?” Caroline’s forehead crinkled, but her pale face brightened. She leaned against the countertop, playing with the edges of her shirt. “I hope so.”

  “Let me know, all right?” Emma asked, ducking her head to catch Caroline’s eyes.

  “Okay.” Her niece tried to smile. “Um, and so, anyway, I need to go to the library for a little while, to work on a project for school. After that, I wanted to meet a new friend at the coffee shop. Can I go?”

  Emma reached for the newspaper, glanced at the headline, and pushed it to one side. Her eyes flickered to Caroline. “A new friend?” The corners of her lips edged up.

  Her niece flushed. “His name’s Russell.”

  “And who is this Russell?”

  “Just a boy I volunteer with at the nursing home.” Caroline’s face grew hot.

  “What? I need to know.” Emma grinned. “
And I am allowed to ask. I want to make sure you’re safe,” Emma said, playing at defending herself. “It’s my job.”

  Caroline ducked back, smiling, then scuffed the floor with the toe of her shoe.

  “Does he go to Mansfield?” Emma searched her brain, trying to remember if Caroline had ever mentioned him.

  “Brunswick. He’s a senior. He just moved here with his parents. He doesn’t know many people yet.” Caroline looked up at the ceiling and attempted a casual shrug.

  Emma tapped her fingertips on the countertop, gazing out the kitchen window. Inside, she turned cartwheels. This meant Caroline wouldn’t be moping around over Jake. “Blood type? Social security number?”

  Her niece folded her arms across her chest.

  “You know I’m teasing,” Emma said with a laugh.

  “It’s not really a date either.”

  “I wasn’t asking,” Emma replied, smoothing out the curve of her lips. She was desperate for the girl to get outside, see other people. Of course, she’d hunt down the new guy, too, if he even thought about wounding Caroline’s fragile heart.

  “All right.”

  Caroline grinned and slung her bag over one shoulder.

  “Have your cell phone?”

  “Yes.”

  Emma reached for her purse and pulled out a few twenties. She folded them in half and handed them to Caroline, whose eyes widened at the gift.

  “Thank you.” She flung her arms around Emma, giving her a quick squeeze.

  “In case you decide to go to the bookstore. Or whatever.” Emma winked.

  Caroline grinned and picked up her keys. She flew out the door a few minutes later, shutting it so quickly that the table quivered.

  Emma sighed and smiled to herself. She could hear Caroline’s steps across the porch. A few minutes later, with Caroline almost out of sight, her cell buzzed with a text from Allie.

  Need a needle and some thread. Have any?

  What in the world? Emma reread the message and sighed. She was tempted to ignore the text, but after thinking about it, now was an excellent time to find out what her sister was up to.

  Emma saved her work, shut down the computer, and headed for the storage closet inside her small garage. It was a small mess, as she’d never unpacked many of the boxes since they’d moved to the house five years earlier. After rummaging through a half-dozen containers, after moving Caroline’s roller skates and paint cans, she found her sewing box.

  On her way out the door, Emma grabbed a sheet of scrap paper, dashed off a note to Caroline. She added Allie’s address and phone number. Not that it was likely anything could drag her niece away from her coffee date, but in the event of a freak tornado or global crisis, at least Caroline would know where to find her.

  Emma tucked the small plastic container on her hip. Walking took less than five minutes, down the sidewalk, around the corner, and into the humid morning, the salty sea air tickling her nose.

  The yard looked freshly mowed and edged. Allie had put out potted plants—perky red geraniums—on the steps. Her sister yanked the door open before Emma raised her fist to knock.

  “Hey. Thank you,” Allie said, looking genuinely grateful. She held out her hands to take the sewing box. “I thought you might have one of these.”

  “No problem,” Emma replied, glancing around the small space. “I actually needed a break from work.”

  “It’s not what you think,” Allie scoffed and started to smile. “Stop looking so nervous. Nothing’s wrong.” She held up a dark pink scrub top with a ripped seam. “I got a job yesterday.” She waved Emma inside the house.

  “What?” Emma’s jaw fell open.

  “Yep.” Allie tapped her lip. “The vet who bought Dad’s office hired me.” She looked up at her sister and shrugged. “She had an ad online, so I went in and talked to her.”

  “Natalie Harper?” Emma tried not to squeak.

  “Oh, do you know her?” Allie perked up, smiling. “I guess it makes sense, considering Dad would have told you all about it.”

  A little shiver ran up Emma’s back. Her father had actually shared very little about letting go of the business. She tucked a stray hair behind her ear. She’d been so busy taking care of Caroline that she didn’t think about how strange it was . . . until now.

  “Emma?” Allie was staring at her.

  “Um, no,” she replied quickly. “He didn’t give me any of the details, other than it was sold,” Emma added. The truth was, her father had practically disappeared when he found out Allie was being released. But it was nothing her sister needed to know. Why would it matter? Emma shoved the thoughts out of her head and mustered as much enthusiasm as she could. “That’s great, though, about the job.”

  “Thanks, I’m pretty happy about it.” Allie’s cheeks flushed pink, the way they always did when she was particularly pleased about something. “I hear Caroline’s working . . . or volunteering.”

  “Yep.” Emma bobbed her head, glancing past Allie at the wall. She should have left right away. Such a mistake.

  “What’s she up to this morning?”

  “Having coffee. With a new guy,” Emma said, keeping her voice nonchalant. “He’s a physical therapy volunteer and works at the nursing home. And a senior at Brunswick.”

  Allie stiffened visibly. “So, have you met him?”

  Emma wrinkled her nose. She had it under control. “No. But, um, it’s just coffee. And it’s a Saturday morning. What do you think is going to happen? I know where she is, and Caroline has her cell phone. I made sure.”

  “Fine,” Allie muttered, opening the sewing box and examining the contents.

  “She’ll be home soon.” Emma glanced at her watch. “And, by the way, keep the sewing stuff. I don’t need it right now.”

  “Thanks.”

  A thudding silence filled the room before Emma could move to the door.

  “How is Caroline? I mean, how is she holding up? Emotionally.”

  Emma cleared her throat. “She’s okay. She’s good.” She wasn’t about to mention Jake or Maddie. She was going to be positive and chipper.

  Allie was suddenly a few shades paler.

  “Like you said, she’s doing volunteer work. She’s at the nursing home, building up her service hours,” Emma added. “I’m so proud of her.”

  Allie didn’t answer and struggled with a smile. The words had pierced her. She knew her sister felt like she should be the one saying those words. But Emma didn’t regret saying it. She had raised Caroline. She could and should take the credit.

  “I’ll tell her you asked about her,” Emma said, moving toward the door. She wanted to leave. She couldn’t stand the sad look, the pitiful expression.

  “Whatever she says . . . let me know,” Allie said, her voice low and tremulous.

  Emma nodded. “I really need to get going.” On the front steps, Emma waved and turned away. She headed in the direction of home, leaving Allie behind.

  Her sister was clinging to a thread of hope. She didn’t realize that her life now was like a maze with no exit, leading her only in circles. Pushing Allie and Caroline apart was for her sister’s own good. Caroline’s too.

  Really, Allie shouldn’t need it spelled out. All of the signs were there: Caroline wasn’t speaking to her, old friends ignored her, and her own parents were keeping a safe distance.

  With a few final steps, Emma flung open the door to her own house and closed it tight behind her, breathing hard and starting to perspire. Emotion she’d tamped down for so long—hurt, loss, anger, and heartbreak—rose in her throat, threatening to spill out. Her sister was a reminder. Now, here in Brunswick, she felt like a weight around Emma’s neck. Pulling her down. Suffocating everything.

  Sooner rather than later, Emma needed Allie gone.

  TWENTY

  NATALIE

  2016

  “You hired her?”

  Natalie watched Nick cough into his hand, eyes wide, as if he’d been told his home was burning to th
e ground. He paced back and forth, occasionally turning to glance at her. Nick was usually a go-along, get-along kind of guy, always comfortable with a prerogative to change one’s mind.

  “Really?” he asked again.

  “It’s temporary. We’ll see how it works out.” Natalie inhaled and blew out a big breath. “She’s qualified. She’s overqualified, actually.” She locked eyes with her husband. “And when it comes time, when it really matters, I want someone like me to give Russell a second chance.”

  “He’s doing all right,” Nick defended him.

  “He’s still living with us,” Natalie said. “What about when we’re not around? What if he starts hanging out with the wrong crowd again? Who’ll help him get away then?”

  “Maybe he’s learned his lesson.”

  A rap on the door interrupted them.

  Nick jerked his head toward the noise. “What the—”

  “Calm down and stop arguing, babe. It’s the sheriff,” Natalie said, bending sideways a few inches so she could wave for the man to come in. Her pulse ramped into overdrive. Please don’t let it be about Russell. He couldn’t be in trouble already. He’d promised.

  “On a Sunday?” Nick muttered.

  With the metallic scrape of old hinges and a groan of wooden floorboards under his boots, Lee Gaines removed his hat and lumbered into the office with a German shepherd panting at his side. “Hey, folks.”

  “Sheriff,” Nick replied, glancing at the dog and then back at Natalie.

  “Hello,” she added warily, her eyes just grazing his face. “Hey, boy,” she cooed to the dog, reaching out the back of her hand for him to sniff.

  “This is Chief.” Gaines released the German shepherd from his leash and fell silent, watching the canine. The dog proceeded to cautiously sniff at Natalie’s fingertips, followed by Nick’s knuckles. Once relaxed, the dog ran his nose along every inch and corner of the room.

  When he was finished, Chief came straight back to Natalie, who leaned down and scratched behind his ears through the thick, wiry fur.