Cherish and Simon- the First Year

by Eva Morian

  Cherish was completely terrified which showed with the short-breathed pants she took. She gazed down both sides of the rarely traveled road and began crying out loud. She should have told Simon, she shouldn't have lied, and now she was stranded without transportation, with her infant child, and no way to contact anyone. Breaking down, she wrapped her hands around her neck and hunched over. Every fiber of her being was stressed because she didn't know what to do, what would happen, or who would find them.

  In the distance, thunder rumbled and over the trees, along the horizon, the sky had already darkened. Now, she couldn't walk. Back stepping towards the scrap heap that would ultimately protect them from the elements, Cherish returned to Jasmine's wails and rolled up the windows. Leaving a slight crack for airflow, she locked every single door, before she climbed in the backseat.

  Unbuckling Jasmine, she held her daughter close and rocked from side to side with her. Though she tried to console her baby, she felt just as helpless. Unable to truly break down and give up, Cherish sighed breathlessly and kept a tight grip on her child while the world quickly darkened around them.

  Several hours passed on the way to winning the jackpot. The men began taking the game seriously and called for second matches. Ten games became twenty, twenty into thirty, and Simon was already well behind with three chips to his name. The men just didn’t want to give Simon Sr. the satisfaction of a victory, but Simon looked at his watch and how dark it was outside. He wasn’t in for another round.

  Inevitably many of the men were drunk and rowdy which caused Jack to speak up, “Who’s up for another? First one to steal it from old man Simon wins.”

  Simon stood and waved his hand while he shook his head, “I think I’m going to skip out. It’s late and I have to get this one in his crib.” He said picking up Jr.’s carrier.

  There were hums of understanding from around the table as they waved back, “Thanks for coming and the twenty bucks!” Gary taunted.

  Simon cut his eyes at them which only made them roar out in laughter, “I’ll take it back from you next poker night. You can count on that.” He replied.

  Simon Sr. got to his feet, “Make that forty. He’s my ride.” He added. There was a sudden cheer that reverberated around the table. He realized the constant rematches were to wear them out until they left, and the others could win the cash.

  Leaving on a good note, they stepped outside and saw an entirely different atmosphere than inside. The sky was covered in dark clouds and the wind whipped rain against them in heavy fall. Simon shut Jr.’s carrier and hustled out to the car. A crack of thunder crashed through the sky and Simon expected to hear choked little cries of his little guy.

  Once he got Jr. locked into his seat and belted in, he saw his little boy was still sound asleep. Getting into the car with his father, he turned the ignition and saw the time was a little past 8 P.M. Knowing he was supposed to meet Cherish at home, he sighed, “I hope she isn’t too worried about us.” He said.

  Father and son cleaned their clouded, wet glasses off on the end of their shirts in sync as Simon Sr. comforted him, “She would have called by now.”

  His father was right.

  Simon felt a bit more at ease as he drove to his parents’ house. Seeing the lights on and his mother standing in the front window, he waved to her while his dad ran to the front door. He hoped that Cherish got to relax and enjoy herself after working so much lately. He knew Imani deserved it as well, plus Miriam. He knew Cherish was thrilled and had a feeling that Jasmine would be asleep before he got home. He was hoping to change out of his wet clothes and watch a movie with Cherish; together.

  Pulling up to his house, Simon pressed on the brakes abruptly. Something in his gut told him this was wrong. It was dark. He tried to make sense of it by convincing himself that Cherish was so relaxed she went to sleep early, but when the garage door lifted, he felt as though his heart was snatched away.

  Her car wasn’t there.

  With an unsettled feeling brewing in his stomach, he brought Jr. inside and turned on the kitchen light, “Cherish?” he called out loud. His voice echoed through the empty house into nothing. He set the carrier down by the couch and rushed upstairs two at a time; ignoring Jr.’s gentle grunts, “CHERISH?!” his desperate tone called again. Common sense would have told him they weren’t home, but he was in a panic.

  Pushing the door to their bedroom open, he saw that the bed was untouched from morning. Quickly, he stormed into the twins’ bedroom and came face to face with Jasmine’s empty crib, “Jasmine!” he said breathlessly. His stomach turned, and his heart sank. There were several possible explanations. She could still be out with the other girls, but deep down he knew better.

  His mother had been home when he dropped his dad off.

  Fear and anxiety started to grip him when he pulled out his phone and called her cell. Not one ring went off before he heard music behind him and saw it face down on the changing table. Going downstairs again, he paced around while he called his mother.

  Making herself, Miriam, and her husband tea in their kitchen, Margaret was in the middle of talking to them about the party and why Jack wasn’t home yet. Miriam was in the middle of telling them that Jack would never leave a table until he was completely broke when Margaret’s phone began to ring. Picking it up with a laugh, she pressed accept and the phone up to her ear. The fear and concern in Simon’s tone was beyond obvious, “Hey, mom…are Cherish and Jasmine over there? I just got home, and they aren’t here. Her car isn’t here and all I’ve found is her cellphone.”

  Almost immediately her smile dropped, and she shut off the burner with the tea, “No, no Simon neither Cherish or Jasmine are here. Miriam and your father are the other only ones.” She said looking at them. With a hand pressed to her stomach, she blew out, “We left the spa three hours ago, Simon and you’re telling me that Cherish isn’t home?” She asked while Miriam clenched her jaw, “I knew we should have followed her home. Today when she was leaving, her car was squealing, and it had a nasty rattle. Your father is going to go and get Jack, so they can search around for her. Miriam and I will stay here and call the sheriff’s departments. I’ll…ask if there have been any accidents.” She whispered quietly. Rubbing her fingertips across her forehead, she licked across her lips, “Simon, I love you and don’t panic but, get out there right now. Be safe.” She ordered before hanging up.

  Margaret’s answer only amplified how dire the situation was. Three hours. That was too long to be lost especially when no one knew where she was. His heart felt as though it was in a tight squeeze as he pushed his phone in his pocket, picked up his son, and returned to the car.

  He wiped his glasses again, took a few calming breaths, and tried to clear his thoughts. Pulling out of the driveway with the co-ordinates of the spa in the GPS, he retraced her route and looked for her car anywhere on the side of the road. He stopped at every auto-repair shop along the way and found that nearly all of them had closed almost an hour before.

  He began seriously regretting the extra time he stayed with the guys. He should have checked on her or tried to call sooner. He blamed a lot on himself. With each mile closer to the spa, the lower his spirits became. With the storm getting worse, he rubbed a hand over his forehead when he found it closed and empty. Jasmine was terrified of thunder and storms. The thought of his baby girl lost somewhere in the weather ate away at him.

  Driving the back roads home with the storm lurking overhead, there were less cars out from the severity and Simon’s mind began running away with him. He couldn’t go back home without them, he couldn’t. Every haunting possibility that he’d suppressed began to bubble to the surface. Slowly, his car crept down the streets before the bright headlights illuminated a sign: “Fresh Strawberries for Sale NOW!” An arrow pointed down a small side road which led off path. A gut feeling overcame his senses because strawberries were Cherish’s favorite. He had nothing else to lose.

  Turning down the road, Simon was unnerved by h
ow isolated and dark it was aside from the cracks of lightning in the sky. The farmer’s market seemed too far away on the never ending, winding street. Finally coming up towards the shrouded area, there wasn’t a sign of Cherish or Jasmine. Gripping the steering wheel, his knuckles were white as continued to crawl down the road. He couldn’t stop looking on each side and would take a couple of glances at Jr. in the backseat. Thankfully, his son was asleep through the chaos and was none-the-wiser that his mother, another mother, could be lost.

  Simon couldn’t comprehend being without them.

  Another two miles down the road, he felt completely hopeless. He called his parents through the Bluetooth in his car, “Please tell me you found them.” He stated desperately. Hearing that they hadn’t, the feeble words of comfort and assurance that Margaret tried to instill in him meant nothing. Just as he was about to lose his mind, pull over onto the side of the road, and cry, he saw something big and black in the distance. His heart was in his stomach when he realized it was Cherish’s car. The lights were out, and nothing moved from what he could see, “I found the car! I found the car, I have to fucking go!” he exclaimed quickly hanging without waiting for a response.

  Parking on the side of the road, he rushed out, shut the door behind him and slid down the slight slope. Running over, he slipped twice and stumbled to his feet without any regard for the mud. Soaked from head to toe, his eyes stung because a part of him tried to prepare to see something he couldn’t handle. His heart stopped. His feet numbly carried him closer to the car before he heard his child shrieking and screaming uncontrollably, “CHERISH! JASMINE! CHERISH!” he yelled. He pulled on the handle and slammed his fists on the window to get inside or see through the fog.

  Throughout the night, the chaos that spiraled in the car only went from bad to worse. Jasmine was over tired, and nothing Cherish could do calmed the little girl down; leaving her to feel hopeless. She held onto Jasmine with her eyes shut and pressed against Jasmine’s little shoulder. Rocking back to forth, the sound of sudden slams on the car caused Cherish to shriek. She’d seen enough scary movies in her mind to know that stranded, on the side of the road, in the dark, and the rain meant death.

  Hearing her name from a voice she wasn’t sure she’d hear so soon caused her to set Jasmine down on the seat. Simon could see their outlines as he said her name again, “CHERISH!” When she looked up at him, it was clear that she was just as terrified. Her eyes were wide and scared with tears streaking down her face, “It’s Simon. Open the door!” he called.

  Hearing his name only confirmed to her that somehow, someway, he’d found her. A complete mess in her emotions, her shaken hands fumbled with the latch of the door before she finally clicked it open. As Simon yanked the door, she saw his soaked, dirtied form looking right at her. Lightning only cracked behind him and he could hear that Jasmine’s wails were hoarse and desperate. Breaking down, Cherish climbed out of the car and immediately wrapped her arms around his torso. Her cries mixed with Jasmine’s as she bawled against his shoulder. Her hair and clothes grew heavy with the water while she clung to him seemingly out of her mind.

  Embracing her in return, his hand held against her head and the other wrapped around her back. His heart was racing but his shoulders were lifted. He was washed over with relief that she was alright, but he was shaking with his face against her hair with his eyes shut. After a moment, he pulled her back and rubbed the side of her face, “Get in the car.” He said.

  Staring into Simon’s eyes, Cherish nodded quietly to herself. She was mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted. To see him there, to know that he looked for and found her, was beyond her. Rushing up the incline, she yanked the door open and sat down in the front seat. She panted out shaking where she sat and stared ahead at Simon.

  Opening the backseat, he picked Jasmine up and held her close while she screamed in his ear. Back in the car once he strapped Jasmine into her seat, his interior was soaked through and he didn’t have a care. Jasmine’s crying caused Jr. to wake up shell shocked to not being in his bed with his sister soaking wet. Now that she saw Jr., Jasmine’s cries quelled down to blubbers.

  Unmounting his cellphone, he turned the heat up and dialed a number. He placed the receiver to his ear and waited for a woman to pick up, “Hello, I’d like to order a tow truck. Yeah. Uh…” He couldn’t think straight while he wiped his face with a dripping wet arm, “Hold on.” He used the GPS and gave the address, “Thank you.” he sighed.

  Calling his mother, as it rang, he let Cherish know about the truck, “They’re twenty minutes away.” He whispered. As Margaret picked up, Simon was bombarded with question after question, “They’re fine. We’re fine and we’re waiting for a tow truck…” He didn’t want to mention that his father and Jack were out looking for them in front of her. He knew her personality and understood that information would upset her, “We love you too. We’ll call you back later.” He said hanging up.

  Staring ahead at Cherish’s car, he found himself growing more frustrated as his emotions settled down. His irritation came through his tone, “I’m getting the stuff out of your car.” Leaving before he had an answer, he shut the door hard.

  Cherish didn’t emote any expression. She sat in the seat and stared out at the car from hell in silence. She hardly heard what he had to say before he left the car but winced at the force he used. Slowly, she lifted her hands to the vent before she glanced back at Jasmine who still whined. She put her sweet baby in danger and placed Simon into a situation of complete fear for what?

  All his swirling thoughts came undone and to the forefront of his mind as he gathered anything important and of value from the front seat. He carried the baby bag, her items, and the car seat to his trunk. Locking her car, he returned inside with an awkward silence between them. He shut his eyes and rubbed his brow before he metaphorically put his foot down, “Cherish. This is it. Tomorrow we’re getting you a brand-new car with a phone built in. All the safety features and you will be getting maintenance on your car the same damn day I get it on mine. This is never, never happening again. I warned you about this damn car, but you insisted on getting that old run-down tin can. Why? For your pride? Even though I wanted you to…” Stopping himself, he released a sigh and knew he was playing the blame game. He was being too harsh, but wanted to get his point across, “…Do you have any idea how terrified it was not knowing where you were? I thought something…” He caught his breath and shut his eyes, “…I thought something horrible happened to you. I didn’t know what to do without you, I looked everywhere. It was like I lost you too…” He shook his head and lowered it, “…If I didn’t find you, Cherish. What do you think would have happened to you and Jasmine? What if someone else found you with bad intentions? Or Jasmine being in a hot car when the sun comes up? God damnit, that fucks me up just thinking about it.” he whispered.

  Fresh tears mingled with the water in her eyes. He was right, what was she thinking? Slowly, her gaze traveled to him before her head dipped back in a sign of complete and utter guilt; weakness. Her hair hung limply over her face and shoulders. She couldn’t find the words to justify what she’d done. All of it was inherently her fault.

  Lights appeared over the hill which signaled the tow-truck had arrived. Getting hooked up and ready to be taken away, the driver told Simon which shop it was being brought to and went on his way.

  Cherish crossed her arms silently to herself and leaned against the door; staring out of the window. Everything he said messed with her head. She would have left he and Jr. behind to pick up the pieces again. Jasmine could have died just as easily as she could have. Anything could have happened in that time and the outcome could’ve been dire. She could feel how upset Simon was at her and that’s what tore her up the most. This man had been through enough and now could’ve lost a little girl he considered his. How could she do that to him?

  Driving home, the interior was terribly silent, and the guilt weighed on his shoulders. He felt as though he w
as far too rough on Cherish. She was, after all, abused by angry, disgusting men and the last thing he wanted was for her to be afraid of him.

  As they pulled into the driveway, she inhaled a deep breath and wiped her eyes with a chilled, damp hand. Jasmine had exhausted herself to sleep in the backseat. Now Jr. was up and hungry. Cherish’s mouth twisted to the side, “I’ll feed Jr. after I change my clothes. I’m so sorry.” She whispered.

  This multiplied his regret by ten.

  Without another word, as if running from her shame, she got out of the car and leaned into the back for Jasmine. Lifting her little limp body from the back, she held her close and hurried for the side door of the house. Unlocking the door with her own set of keys, she disappeared into the house. Tossing the keys in the dish, she should’ve felt washed with relief, but she was filled with nothing but disappointment in herself. She didn’t deserve the home she’d been lucky enough to receive. She didn’t deserve the man who cared for her with a wonderful family who felt the same. She didn’t even deserve the baby in her arms. After all this time, she still couldn’t take care of her. Cherish trudged up the steps, beating herself up in her thoughts.

  Simon Sr.’s car pulled in the driveway with the parents unbeknownst to her. Margaret was the first out while Miriam and the others went inside of the house. She could hear the sleepy cries from Jasmine up the stairs. She pointed to the formula on the countertop and glanced back at her husband, “Make a bottle for her, would you? I’m going to go and help Cherish.” She whispered before she trailed up the steps.

  A sliver of light from the baby room was the only thing visible in the hallway. Miriam pushed the door open and saw Cherish struggling with stripping her daughter from the wet clothes. The creak from the door caused Cherish’s head to snap in Miriam’s direction and the latter was able to see just how haggard and worse for wear she was. Silently, she stepped into the room with her hands out, “I’ve got her. Don’t worry about a thing, sweetheart. I’ll change Jasmine, but you need to get out of those clothes before you catch a cold. Alright?” she asked.