“How did you know I paint?”
“You mean, how did I know you’re an artist?”
“Semantics, but yes.”
“I came in to the bar again, hoping to see you. Your friend, Lisa…” He stopped and just looked ahead of him.
“Lisa? What did Lisa…” but I knew already. She told him. She told this stranger I’d been attacked. “What did she say exactly?”
He answered by wrapping his arms around me and holding me in a tender embrace. All at once I felt confused and cherished and safe. I felt safe. I lifted my own arms and retuned his affection and held him as close to me as I could. This was wrong, I shouldn’t be doing this. I was playing with fire, tempting this handsome man and myself. The only problem was it felt so comfortable and natural. I didn’t feel like I was doing anything wrong at all. I was exactly where I wanted to be.
Quite slowly, his hand glided up my spine, across my exposed skin. He grazed his fingers down the side of my neck across my collar bone, brushing the tops of each breast, sending a heat between my legs.
“You look beautiful. The dress, the color, it shows everyone what I saw that first day. You’re strong and determined but fragile at the same time, something you don’t want others to mistake as a sign of weakness.” His lips hovered over mine as he spoke, never quite touching me, filling me with a desire, just on the edge between pleasure and pain. “I want to kiss you so much. I want to show you what a beautiful woman you are. I want to appreciate you for you but I don’t want to add more pain to your life. Tell me what you want, Anika.”
I pressed against him, moving my neck into his lips, letting them kiss me, a preview of the undeniable pleasure I knew he was more than capable of giving me. How could I do this? How could I betray Evan? I was so caught up in the moment. Why couldn’t I have met him months ago, years ago? Why did he have to show up now?
“Stop,” I whimpered, pulling my body away but still wrapped in his arms. “Please, take me home. I’m a few blocks from Rusty’s. Make a right at Capo Park.”
His kisses on my flushed skin were lighter. He cupped my face in his hands and kissed my forehead, “You’ve done nothing wrong here, Anika. This was all me. I had to take the chance. Don’t for one minute feel guilty about this, okay? I think you and I have an inexplicable connection. I know you feel it. I felt it that day when you had that panic attack. I had to know if it was just me but then I saw the painting. Tell me…was it just me?”
“Please, I... I can’t. Please take me home.” I shook my head back and forth, “I love Evan. He’s my future.”
“He’s your now. He’s your safe but he doesn’t understand you, does he? You hold back with him?” How did he know me so well? Just from that brief moment, the unspoken hurt from our pasts, he knew me better than Evan or Aimes. He knew me better than anyone.
“Please take me home.”
He kissed each of my cheeks, took my hand and led me to the car. After he closed my door, I looked out the window and saw how black the ocean was. For a brief moment, I wished it would just swallow me whole. I was swimming in my own emotion. One of the happiest nights of my life had just become one of the most confusing.
“Hey…” he asked. I turned my head to him, trying once again to stop the tears from falling. He brought a thumb under each eye and brushed them away. “I took a chance,” he said, resigned. “I want you to be happy, Anika Redding. I have a piece of you that I will always treasure and that just has to be enough. Thank you for sharing your gift with me. I’ll take you home. Promise me though, if you ever need me, please call me. Any time at all. Just call me.”
***
I closed the door behind me and breathed deeply. I took a compact from the little bag I’d brought and checked my appearance and was actually surprised I still looked great. I could just say the champagne got to me, that’s why my eyes were tired and red.
I walked into the quiet house. Aimes and Lisa were still working. Gus would be at the bar with Aimes and Evan wasn’t back from L.A. yet. I didn’t even look for anyone’s car. I just walked in. I wished Evan could have seen me dressed up so I decided to leave my ensemble on as long as possible. I was proud that even though I’d been faced with such an incredible temptation, I didn’t give in. I hadn’t kissed Cole Carlyle. As much as I wanted to deny it, he’d been right. Everything he said to me about my relationship with Evan, he was right. But I also knew he and his wife had only recently split. Maybe he was just really good at reading people. No, that wasn’t it and I knew it. This man knew me. We had our moment, our shared connection but it was over before it even began. I was engaged to Evan. I loved Evan and I just needed affirmation. I would tell him just how much when he walked in that door.
***
My buzz was wearing off. It was only one o’clock in the morning and I knew I still had some time before Aimes and Gus came home. If I stayed in my room, I’d just fall asleep so I decided to have some wine, await their arrival and tell them all about my big night. I made quick work of the cork and took a few glasses out of the cupboard and wiped them until they sparkled. My job as a bartender ensured this would happen for the rest of my life. I took a sip of the chilled Chardonnay from the glass and set it down when I heard a thud coming from the end of the hall.
I wasn’t alone in the house. My room-mates were not home. Panicked, I knew I had to hide and fast. It occurred to me then that Papa Joe could have easily been watching me, waiting for another opportunity to have his way. He never took no for an answer and the fact that he was interrupted last time would ensure his determination to make me suffer and get what he wanted. Please God, I can’t take any more tonight.
I padded lightly to the slatted pantry door in the kitchen and opened it. Once inside, I tried to calm my breathing while I looked for something I could potentially use as a weapon. I just had to stay quiet. Every slight movement I made rustled the thick fabric of my dress. It seemed to amplify in the tiny space. I didn’t know if it was Papa Joe but hopefully an intruder would never look in the pantry. They’d look for jewelry or cash. I heard a door open at the end of the hall and another loud thud, something hitting the wall. The sound grew closer but I couldn’t see anything. My heart raced, waiting to catch a glimpse of him. Reality struck when I realized that whoever it was, that person was here when I came home. I could have been killed. I was sure the door was locked though, I used my key. Ah fuck, you idiot, Inky! What intruder uses the front door to break in? It was probably through a window. All these thoughts raced through my head as the sound grew closer.
I heard a stifled gasp…Oh my God, Lisa! That’s Lisa! What do I do? I looked around again, maybe a heavy can of something, soup or chili. I could just start throwing them until I got the phone and called nine one one. She gasped again, she can’t breathe, he must be choking her! Oh my God! I felt a cold sweat forming on the back of my neck. I can’t be a coward. Maybe Joe couldn’t find me and got Lisa instead. I had to help her. I could hear her trying to say something. Let me just hear you talk, Lisa. Just let me hear your voice! If something happened to her, if Joe hurt her…I would never forgive myself for bringing more drama to my friends. Her breathing was getting heavier and more irregular, fuck! What do I do, what do I do?! I couldn’t control my breathing any longer, little tears slid down my face. Then I heard her speak.
“When do you think she’ll be back?”
Huh?
“I don’t know? That’s the fun of it though, right?”
Evan?
“Does she ever let you fuck her like this?”
“Let’s not talk about her. You promised.” I could hear him thrusting into her as my heart was breaking in the pantry. I gripped the shelves on either side of me to hold me up as my legs threatened to give way. He moved her against the kitchen island and I had a front row seat to their betrayal. They’d slowed their amorous deceit to carry on a conversation.
“Why did you even ask her to marry you?”
“I got caught up in the moment.” He
said it like it was no big deal. I was surprised he didn’t shrug his shoulders.
“Did you ever tell her about us?”
“Of course not, baby. She would never have trusted you.”
Baby. I called all my lovers baby. But it was ours, me and Evan, not them.
“She must be a pretty bad judge of character to trust either one of us.” They both laughed. They were laughing at me while they fucked in our kitchen.
“Ahh.” She cried out.
“Say it, baby. Say it.” He asked her. It was right then that I realized that night at the beach, he wasn’t having sex with me, he was having sex with her. He’d played us both. Lisa used to get high all the time; she would have brought a pipe to the beach with him.
“You’re…the fucking…best!” She cried out.
Seriously?
“That’s right, baby. I’m the fucking best!”
He pulled her to the edge of the island, went to his knees and started to eat her out. She threw her head back and grabbed the edges, “Oh my God, Evan, yes. Oh, that is so. Fucking. Good.”
I heard the front door slam.
“What the fuck is this?” Aimes. It must be after two. I watched Lisa hop down and hide behind the island, grabbing a dishtowel to cover her breasts from Gus’s view. Evan stood next to her to hide his nakedness. I had a clear view of Evan’s semi-erect dick while he turned to the side to try and cover her and a perfect view of Lisa’s perfect ass.
Bitch.
“I knew it!” Aimes screamed. “What the fuck is wrong with you, Lisa? How could you do this to her? You were there, drying every tear she cried over this cock sucker!”
“Aimes, I... ” Evan tried to talk but Aimes was clearly not going to allow that.
“Fuck you, Evan. Shut the fuck up!” Her voice was high and shrill.
“Honey, do you want me to…”
“Are you fucking kidding me right now, Gus?” I could see how hard she was breathing. I had never seen Aimes this mad, not once.
“Honey, I was just gonna ask if you wanted me to kick his ass a little bit for you.” It was nice to know Gus the Marine had my back.
“No, I can do it myself.” I saw Evan physically tense up.
“Well?” Aimes asked.
“Look, Lisa and I had a thing before I ever asked Ink if she wanted to get married. I was just trying the idea on for size. I thought that’s what I wanted at the time but so much shit has happened in the last few months, I just…”
“You just what, you stupid fuck?”
“Hey, watch it Aimes. It’s not his fault she’s bat-shit crazy.” I swear Aimes suddenly had super human strength. She flew over the counter and the sound of flesh and bone meeting horrified me. I couldn’t move. I was paralyzed, letting the events of my life play out. Gus pulled Aimes off of Lisa, taking a chunk of golden hair with her. Evan tried to place his body in front of Lisa.
“You fucking bitch! She thought you were her friend! Get the fuck out of this house, Lisa, you fucking whore!”
“You’re one to talk, Aimes. You’ve fucked half the United States Marine Corp!” She spat, holding her hand to where the hair had been ripped out, her perky breasts exposed. Aimes tried to throw herself at her again but Gus held her tight.
“Aimes!” Evan was yelling at her now. “Take it easy. Okay? We didn’t mean for this to happen.”
“Like fuck you didn’t!” She spat.
Gus still held her against him, her head resting just below his sternum. “Evan, I know this is not the ideal situation, but you better not raise your voice to my woman.”
“But it’s okay for her to call Lisa a whore?” Evan bit out.
“Like I said, don’t speak to her like that.”
“Get out! Both of you. Lisa I want your shit gone, you hear me? I don’t care where you go but you can’t stay here. I’m gonna be the bearer of bad news for both of you assholes. I thank fuck she didn’t have to see this.”
I decided now was my big moment.
I opened the door and appeared behind Evan and Lisa. Gus saw me first, then Aimes, whose eyes immediately welled up with tears. I saw Evan’s head drop, his entire body sinking with realization. Lisa stood there like a defiant child, never looking back.
“In all my life…” I said calmly, “I never imagined I would have a front row seat to my fiancé fucking one of my best friends in our kitchen, and then eating her out where we have coffee every morning. Aimes, get your keys and your toothbrush. I’m treating you to room service at the resort. If we can’t get a room there, we’ll go to that awesome dive motel I lived in for a while. Gus, you think you can handle a night away from your beloved?”
“I reckon I can, Inky. You look real pretty by the way.”
“Thanks, Gus.” It was then that Evan finally turned around. I saw the pain in his face and I did feel for him, but I was mostly numb at that moment. I just needed to get away from him. “Get your shit out of my room, Evan, and help Lisa pack and put it in your truck.”
“You know I’m standing right here, Ink. Oh, and my name’s on the lease too.” Lisa didn’t want to be ignored.
“Hang on. Don’t move…either of you.” Maybe it was my attire or my attitude but they didn’t budge.
I went into my room and opened the bottom dresser drawer and pulled it out completely. Wedged against the frame were stacks of bills bundled into thousand dollar bundles. I had over ten grand saved, not to mention the sale of the painting. I didn’t need to go to Rusty’s for a while. I put the drawer back and grabbed a backpack, shoving a few items I needed for an overnight stay and some other things I didn’t want Evan to take.
“Here.” I said to Lisa, handing her a stack of cash. “That’s first and last and your share of the security deposit. You’ve just been evicted. Have a nice life.”
I turned and walked right up to Evan who was still standing naked in the kitchen. I took a step back and looked at him, really looked at him. What was it about him that I just couldn’t resist all these years? I took one more step back, I looked down at my beautiful dress, recalling how all I wanted was to share this experience with the man I loved and without any more hesitation, I slapped him across the face, sending a stinging pain that shot up my arm and echoed through the kitchen. He looked at me, completely stunned. I looked at him, completely empowered.
He held his face with his hand, shock draining the color from his body, “I’m so sorry, Inky. It wasn’t supposed to happen this way.”
“Oh, is there a better way to break someone’s heart?” It could’ve been the slap, but his eyes were filled with tears. “Shouldn’t you be packing, Lisa?” I asked. She stomped away and still looked beautiful doing it. “Evan, you probably did me a big favor. You probably did us both a big favor but the worst part of this? You were one of my best friends. I let you in and you couldn’t handle it. I knew better but I did it anyway. So the joke’s on me. I’ll know better next time. If there is a next time.
I’ll stay away from Rusty’s for a while. If you forgot anything, I’ll take it there. Don’t call me. Don’t contact me. Stay away from me. I walked out of the kitchen and opened the front door. “Tell Aimes I’ll be waiting in the car.”
“Inky?” Evan said, “I do love you. I just can’t do forever with you. I don’t want to lose your friendship.”
I closed the door. I wasn’t going to start crying there in the kitchen. I had so many conflicting emotions going on all at once. I just needed to get out of there. Aimes was out the door a minute later. We started to drive and she said nothing for a long time, her eyes wide with fury.
“Aimes, can you please pull over for a minute?” I had my seatbelt off before the car stopped. I opened the door, leaned out and started to throw up. The alcohol, the adrenaline, my fiancé fucking Lisa in the kitchen, Cole. It all took its toll.
Cole. I should’ve kissed him. Aimes pulled my beautiful dress out of the line of fire and rubbed my back. When I was done, she handed me a bottle of water.
&nb
sp; I rinsed my mouth and spit into the gutter, “How’s my hair? Does it still look good?”
“You want to know how your hair looks?”
“Yes.”
“Well, Ink, it looks surprisingly great. Uh, did you have too much to drink tonight?” She asked cautiously.
“It was spread out over several hours. No, I think shock and the fact my heart is trying to jump out of my body is what made me puke. Not to mention, even before I got home, I had a pretty eventful night.”
“Where do you want to go?”
“Vegas? Just kidding. Can you ask Gus to call us when they’re gone?”
“Of course, honey. You seem oddly okay.”
“Like I said, I’m in shock I think. It’s strange but I thought I’d be more upset than this.” I stared out the window as she started driving again. “Such a strange night. It was amazing. The first three quarters of it anyway, were absolutely amazing. On second thought, let’s just go hang out at Denny’s and drink vast amounts of coffee. Is that okay?”
“Awesome.” Any time was a good time for Denny’s.
“Aimes?”
“Yeah?”
“It was pretty kick ass how you laid into Lisa and Evan. Thanks.”
“Anytime, Ink. Any time.”
Chapter 14
“Fuck, my head is killing me.” Gus, the morning coffee fairy handed me a fresh cup. “Gus, maybe we could just pay you to be our house boy. You can cook and make coffee. You don’t have to do laundry or clean, just supply us with delicious food and fresh coffee.”
“I think we can work something out.” He laughed shyly.
“How ya feeling there, Ink? Here, have some make-it-ache-less pills.” She handed me two orange tablets.
“For which part? My head or my heart?” Ah, yes. I was single again, wasn’t I?
“Even hung over, you’re creative. Well, at least the smell of whore and cock sucker is gone.” This is why it’s great to have a friend like Aimes.
“I can still kick his ass if you want me to, Inky. Aimes won’t let me but you say the word and I’m your man.” I noticed that just about all of Lisa’s things were gone when we got back. I’m sure Gus must’ve helped but they worked quickly.
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