Inky

by J. B. Hartnett

  “Yes.” I said quietly. “I know I’m killing the mood but maybe we can rid the room of elephants.”

  “Good call. Okay, my life didn’t belong to me. For as long as I can remember, I was never given a choice about anything. I was allowed to have hobbies but even things I excelled at, if it wasn’t what my father wanted me to do, if it didn’t suit his needs or the needs of the business, then it wasn’t important. There were a couple of things I excelled in that I wanted to pursue. My mom tried not to antagonize my father if she could help it. He used to drink heavily. He still drinks but not like he used to. His temper would get out of control; he only got physical once when I was eight. My mother threatened to leave him but she knew he would never let her take me.

  When I was in college I arranged a meeting with him and decided to try to speak with him man to man, tell him I had no interest in his business. He told me he should’ve let my mother raise me as the bastard I always was to him, that he doubted I was even his blood because I resisted being part of what he’d built. Before I knew it, he’d closed the door to his office and locked it. When I turned around to face him, trying not to cower like I had my entire life, he held me in a choke hold. It was like I was eight years old again. Everything was the same. He had me face down on his office desk and I was ready to feel his belt against my back, except this time I felt something hard and cold pressed to my temple. He told me, as calm as you’d be ordering a drink, that he didn’t invest twenty years in anything that he didn’t think would pay off. When he let me go, I had no emotion at all. I was completely numb.

  I walked out of his office and went back to my apartment just off campus. I wrote my mom a letter. I explained to her exactly what happened while it was fresh in my mind. I wanted her to know I was sorry, that I loved her but I couldn’t seem to find another way out. I cleaned the apartment and packed everything, not wanting to leave a mess for my mom to deal with on top of everything else. I laid garbage bags on the bathroom floor and a couple of layers of towels…”

  “Why did you…?”

  “Easier to clean. Then I used a box cutter. I have to say, the first one hurt, but the second one hurt like a mother fucker.”

  “Jesus, Cole.”

  “I thought one of my buddies would find me. That was one of the reasons I had the towels there. I knew it would be traumatic enough to find the dead body of one of your friends, but to find them in a pool of blood…I couldn’t do that to anyone.”

  “Please don’t tell me it was your mom.”

  “You’ll never guess.” He paused and took a breath when I didn’t answer.

  “I lost consciousness pretty quickly but I was being jerked awake by someone telling me, ‘I’m sorry’ over and over. It was my dad. To this day I have no idea why he was there but he was the one who found me. My mom and I never discussed the letter. He left me alone after that and she helped me get through the darkest parts. When I was a kid, his rages used to throw me into a full blown panic attack and my mother would take me into my room, lock the door and sing to me until I calmed down. But the suicide attempt…I thought I was making a choice between freedom or death. I didn’t see any other options.”

  “I don’t know what to say, Cole.”

  “It’s really okay, Anika. He wasn’t the kind of dad that takes you out to the yard and throws the ball around with you. I can tell you about the cut and clarity of most precious gems. My mom pushed for me to run the hotels on my own, without my dad’s input. I agreed because even though I don’t want to follow in my dad’s footsteps, I’m good at it and I needed to do something. I arranged it so Trinity pays back the purchase price to Carlyle Corp, like a business loan. I go to a board meeting once a month and sign things here and there. The people who oversee the company have done just fine so I kept them in their jobs. They like me, they hate my dad, and they keep everything running smoothly but I’m the ultimate decision maker. If I need business advice, I ask my friend, Olaf.”

  “Are you happy doing that?” I asked.

  “It’s a job. There were some issues when I took over but I resolved them pretty quickly, gained the trust of the board and didn’t make them feel insignificant like my father would have. I’ll make it strong again, then finish paying out Carlyle Corp and maybe do something else. I’m not sure what.” He looked beyond me for a second and I worried that he might slip into one of his dark times again. “Whatever I do now, whatever decisions I make I do so independent of my father. I hate feeling like I owe him anything.”

  “I kinda hate your dad.” It was the only thing I could think of to say.

  “Me too.” He said with understanding. “Me too.”

  Chapter 23

  Cole barbequed garlic prawns on the deck and we watched the sunset together. I didn’t call, nor had I thought about Aimes the entire day. Somehow, I had found someone who I knew without a doubt, I could be myself with and the best part was, he felt the same way. We were more alike than I ever imagined. After he told me about his past, I felt even more at ease. I was happy right here, watching the sun disappear, leaving an orange glow across the sky.

  We sat there, enjoying each other’s company, happy with the silence between us. Our peace was interrupted by the ring of his cell phone. “Of course” he smirked. “Sorry, I have to take this. I’ll be right back.”

  He disappeared into the house and slid the large door closed behind him. I could just hear him above the crashing waves. I couldn’t make out what he was saying but I knew he was not happy about it. I had no intention of eavesdropping. I was sure if there was something I needed to know, he’d tell me. I didn’t turn around when the door opened again.

  “Anika... No, hang on, Anthony.” He held the phone away and pressed what I assumed was a mute button. “Do you mind coming with me to an event this evening?”

  “What kind of event? I don’t mind, I only ask because I’m not sure if I have anything appropriate to wear. Oh! I can wear the dress I wore to the Gillies Exhibition. I had it dry cleaned and everything; it’s all ready to go.”

  “Well, as much as I hate to say this, some of the same people from that Exhibition will be at this event as well. It’s a cocktail party thrown by Olaf Evist. He was at the exhibit and, well, I’ll tell you the rest in a minute. I’ll arrange a dress and everything. Is that okay?”

  “That’s totally fine.” I smiled.

  “God, thank you. What a relief to hear you say that…yeah, Anthony? Okay, size…I’m gonna say ten?” I nodded yes. Oh, he’s good.

  “Black, cocktail, everything…what size shoe, Anika?”

  “Eight.”

  “Do you prefer a low heal or something that defies gravity?” He asked with a mischievous grin.

  “Doesn’t matter as long as I don’t have to go jogging in it.”

  “Bring a couple of options. I’ll send you a photo of her so you can get the skin tone as close as possible,” he whispered to me, “makeup?” I shook my head back and forth smiling, “Just go to Macy’s or something. I don’t care who the designer is, really. No, not through the business, through me. Yes. See you soon.”

  “Are you wearing a tux?” I asked as he approached me. I made sure I was lying as seductively as possible.

  “Smile, I have to send him your picture.” I did as he asked and listened to the phone whoosh the picture into the void. “Yes, I have to wear a tux.”

  “Would it help to know I’m looking forward to seeing you in a tux? And would it also help that I’m looking forward to taking you out of said tux later?”

  “The idea is growing on me.”

  “If anything else is growing on you, I’d be happy to assist you with that too, if there’s time.” I laughed.

  “You’re a little vixen, aren’t you?”

  “Maybe a teensy bit.” I grinned.

  “Follow me. I have a surprise for you and it isn’t sexual. Maybe a little anticipation would be good for us. We could get to know each other better or something like that. A little late in
the game, I know.” He casually walked me toward the stairs to his bedroom.

  “You’re so boring, geez.” I said sarcastically, eye rolling and all much to his amusement.

  “Before I really freak you out, are you okay? I mean about this?” He lifted his exposed wrists to me.

  “I really am.” I gave him a genuine smile.

  He closed his eyes and stopped for a moment taking a deep breath and continuing. “I’m glad. So, glad. Come on.”

  He led me up the stairs but continued to the back of the room. On the left was a door I’d previously thought was a closet. It turned out there were two doors; one was indeed a closet but the other was a stairway to another level.

  “Wow, this place has all sorts of nooks and crannies.”

  “Okay, now I want you to do your best to not freak out. If you feel like you need to freak out, that’s okay. But I think you’ll like this surprise. It’s not food by the way or coffee for that matter.”

  “I’ll try to hide my disappointment.” He chuckled and continued up the stairs.

  When he opened the door in front of me, it flooded with natural twilight, a square room with floor to ceiling windows on each side and another smaller deck that surrounded it. He walked across the wooden floor boards and opened two large glass doors that look to the sea. In the center of the room, taking pride of place stood a large wooden easel and what looked to be the contents of an art supply store. “Wow.”

  “Wow good or wow bad?” I sunk down into a crouching position and looked around. It was my dream. Somehow Cole Carlyle had gotten inside my head. “Don’t answer that just yet. I had intended on keeping the telescope here and moving it onto the small deck when some celestial event was going on. I thought it would be a nice place to read or just be with the ocean, daydream, what have you. I wanted to gift you with paint and a new easel. I noticed the one you use at home looks like it might be on its last legs…no pun intended…it’s my way of thanking you for sharing your process with me. But as it stands, this room is unused. If you want to, you can paint here. It’s yours.”

  Wow good.

  I was freaking out a little bit. But this was a different kind of anxiety. This was butterflies in the stomach, not a reaction I was familiar with. I should have had stalker-alarm bells going off in my head but I didn’t. It was sweet. I also couldn’t believe he’d offered me my own little space in his home. Instead, I told him a story.

  “So, a few years back, Aimes and Lisa were watching daytime TV and this talk show comes on. Eventually they called me in to watch this episode about a book called The Gift of Fear. All these people had bad things happen to them: one girl was being stalked, and the other one discovered a hidden camera in her home…things like that. They all got this feeling that something wasn’t right, hence, the gift of fear. My Spidey senses work overtime and you know what? This is not one of those times. So in answer to your question, wow good.”

  He walked over and lifted me up and into his arms, “God, Anika. You are wonderful.”

  “Back atcha.”

  “Oh, you might not be saying that after tonight. I didn’t tell you everything yet. I thought I’d take a risk and soften the blow with your gift first.”

  “Continue…” I raised my eyebrow, teasing him. What on earth could he possibly tell me that would change my mind?

  “My parents will be there.”

  “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Did you say your parents?”

  “I did, yes.”

  I can do this. I can meet the parents. I think I’ll like his mom as long as she doesn’t think I’m trash but his dad, well, it might be my second physical altercation in a week.

  “Cole, it might not be a big deal to you but I’m not from that world. I don’t know what to say or do, who’s who…I might be an embarrassment to you and I’m not saying that in a self-deprecating way either. It’s the truth. I think you know that.”

  “That’s part of the reason I like you. You’re nothing like them. I can’t stand these things, but having you there with me will make it tolerable. One thing I can tell you is that my mother will love you just as much as I do. She hated Emma by the way. I can also tell you that she’ll be your ally. My father will barely glance at you, if he does approach us at all. We try to give each other a wide berth. The other thing you should know, you might get recognized from the exhibition; the man throwing the party, Olaf, he tried to outbid me for your painting of the seaside.”

  “You’ve mentioned him before.”

  “His father and mine always ran in the same circles. We’ve known each other since we were kids although he’s a bit older than I am. He’s a good guy, a friend. His parents died in a light plane crash when he was twenty. His dad was a good man, always good to me. A story for another time.”

  Well, isn’t that interesting. I remembered the group of men looking at my painting. “As long as I don’t have to sing, I should be fine. I don’t have a problem with crowds or anything. My anxiety is song-specific.”

  “I put that together already, Anika. You can tell me when you’re ready.”

  He didn’t miss a thing.

  “Hello?” A voice called out from downstairs.

  “Up here, Anthony. Just wait in the bedroom. We’ll be right there.” Looking down at me, his face was just shadows in the quickly darkening room, “I’ll look forward to taking you home with me.” He began to lead me to the stairway back to his bedroom when he stopped and pulled me to him. He cupped my jaw in one hand, “Thank you, Anika.” He said softly. “Thank you for being exactly who I thought you were.” He brushed his lips against mine and gave me a soft, sweet kiss. “We’d better get ready. The car will be here…with my mother…at 9:30.”

  “That’s probably something you should also have mentioned.”

  We entered the room to see five large Macy’s bags and three garment bags lying across the bed. I was pretty sure my jaw dropped from the rest of my face.

  “Thank you, Anthony. You’ll help Anika? Anthony used to be a personal assistant to a Hollywood Starlet so this is something he’s good at. I’ll leave you two alone and shower downstairs and get dressed. I’ll make a cocktail for us. Do you have a preference?”

  “Ah, no. Maybe a sedative of some sort?” I joked. Well, half joked.

  “I’ll just grab my things and see you down there.” He winked and I stood in the room, still in shock.

  When we were alone, Anthony properly introduced himself. “Anthony Campos. It’s a pleasure, Anika. Would you prefer that or Ms. Redding?”

  “Anika is fine.” Funny that I was known as Inky to anyone else in the world. Maybe this was a turning point for me.

  I couldn’t be 100% sure but I was thinking that Anthony might be gay. Then he confirmed it by saying, “Oh, you are beautiful. He said you were beautiful but after that Hagatha Emma, I don’t know if Cole hot-cock Carlyle is a good judge.”

  “Hot cock?”

  “Oh, if only he would look my way. Sadly, straight as the pole my momma dances on.” The strength it took to hold back my laughter was worthy of a medal.

  “I like you, Anthony.” I smiled, hoping I didn’t have to elaborate. I was nervous and might just say something completely inappropriate.

  “Uh, Anthony?”

  “Yes, doll?” He answered as he began sorting through bags.

  “I’m having a hard time with my real life Pretty Woman experience right now. I get that Cole has money and his family has money but this…” I waved my hand over the stock pile of Macy’s swag, “is a little, uh, I kind of want to jump out that window.”

  “Oh, don’t worry about any of that. Here’s how it works. I’m a haggler. I get the best deal I can. I wheel and deal, got the makeup for nothing and managed to get them to throw in a dress for free. The shoes were on sale too. But the thing is, this has never happened before and I mean, never. My job is normally very boring. The gossip I’ve heard about your Cole” he whispered, “before Hagatha, he’d been single for ages. His mom tried to
fix him up but she told me he hated that so she stopped. So, you must be something pretty special. Even if it doesn’t work out, he’s a nice guy. Just have a good time and let him have this, yeah?”

  No pressure or anything.

  I didn’t respond.

  “Okay, for your coloring, I decided on this dress. Beautiful isn’t it? Now, there’s a boring black thing and a wispy pastel number but this one” he unzipped the garment bag and yes, it was looking very nice, “is perfect for formal cocktail meet the parents…what do you think?”

  On closer inspection, it was lovely. A rich sapphire blue, off the shoulder number. He opened a box with matching shoes – not too high either but gorgeous. “Beautiful.” I breathed.

  “Great! We better get you ready for the ball then, Cinderella. So, here are some under-things. Don’t worry about showing some skin around me. When I worked for Miss Thing, I saw every perfect puckering pink part that girl had. Burned into my brain forever unfortunately. I’ll get everything ready for you. Don’t wash your hair; it’ll be easier to style if you don’t.”

  “Oh, I do a mean chignon, Anthony.” I walked toward the bathroom.

  “Me too. Let me dress you up. It’s your big night after all. I insist.”

  I was having quite a few big night events in my life as of late. At quarter past nine, I was perfectly primped and coiffed. There wasn’t a hair out of place. Anthony had tidied up the room from its Macy’s explosion and I was ready to make an entrance.

  “Anthony?”

  “You okay?” he asked concerned.

  “I feel like I’m about to walk into the lion’s den. Can you give me some inside information, on the down low?”

  “First off, you look fantastic, don’t worry about that. You’re wearing designer everything. Cole has your jewelry downstairs. Second, Mr. Carlyle senior is an asshole. He’s very intimidating. Hold your ground and you’ll be fine but be yourself. He’ll try to find your weakness and bring you down. Be nice but not fake with him or he’ll smell it on you. Mrs. Carlyle is a gem. She married into money; she’s not born from it so she’s down to earth but knows how to play the game. My tip? Be a united front.”