Sleeping Dragons

by Phoebe Ravencraft

  “Agreed,” Scott said. “If you’ll excuse me, I’ll arrange quarters for you tonight.”

  “Oh, to hell with that,” I said. “I may be working with you, but I am not spending the night here.”

  “Ms. Kincaide,” Brinson said. “The Guild will not stop. We’ve already explained that. You need to be where we can keep you safe. Until the mission is over, you should stay here.”

  “I am not giving up my life for this!” I said. “I don’t trust you people. And Big Brother Ephraim does not want me involved at all. You think I’m sleeping where he’ll have access to me?”

  “You can’t stay where Mk’Rai and his agents can get to you,” Ash said.

  “Look, I have a full day tomorrow,” I explained. “I have students in the morning and work in the afternoon. I am not giving up my life because you assholes accidentally convinced a dragon I needed killing.

  “You want to send a security detail to watch over me? Fine. But I am sleeping in my own bed, far away from Brother Ephraim and a bunch of magical shit.”

  Everyone stared at me in shock. They all thought I was crazy. I’m not sure I wasn’t. But I did not trust these people. There was shit they weren’t telling me. I could feel it. And Ephraim hated me too much. There was something there I didn’t know about, and it scared me. It might not have been the smartest thing, but I was determined to stay as far away from Order HQ as I could.

  “Ms. Kincaide, I don’t think you appreciate the delicacy—”

  “We can manage it, Director,” Ash said. “It won’t be easy, but we have the personnel and the ability. We can put an observation team on the street, and use scrying to observe the apartment.”

  I turned and gave him a surprised eyebrow raise. Why was this guy being so nice to me? Did he have the hots for me? And why did I want him so bad? This was definitely very inconvenient and dangerous.

  Scott opened his mouth to protest. He shut it again and thought for a moment.

  “Very well,” he said. “It’s not ideal, but if you think you can manage it Agent Shinoch, that’ll do.”

  “Wait,” I said, looking at Ash, “you’re gonna manage it?”

  “Ash is one of our security experts,” Brinson said. “He’ll be on your team when you break into the dragon’s lair. You’re in good hands with him.”

  Ash looked embarrassed. I felt uncomfortable, but not for reasons that had anything to do with the mission.

  “I’ll take good care of you, Ms. Kincaide,” he said.

  That sounded like a promise – the kind of promise you make outside of work.

  “Okay, so I need to get going. How about we make whatever arrangements you need to, so I can get the hell out of here.”

  “I’ll leave it all to you, Agent Shinoch,” Scott said. “Ms. Kincaide, thank you for your help. With a little luck, we’ll have this over with and you back to the life you desire in no time at all.”

  “Heh,” I said. “We’ll see.”

  Scott excused himself. Brinson followed him out. Ash turned to me with a nervous smile.

  “All right, Ms. Kincaide, tell me what I need to know about your building.”

  I shook my head at him.

  “Listen, if we’re gonna work together, you’re gonna have to drop the formality,” I said. “Call me ‘Sassy.’”

  “Very well, Sassy. Tell me everything I need to know.”

  My heart fluttered. There was a lot to say. I confined it to security concerns on my apartment.

  He definitely did not need to know how much I wanted him.

  Nine

  T he next day, I was in a pretty damned bad mood. Partly, it was because I was embarrassed at what went down the night before. I’d effed up in a fight. I let that damned demonic behemoth fall on top of me. I was really lucky to be alive.

  Worse, I’d had to be rescued. And I didn’t exactly like the people who’d done me the favor. They were the ones who started all this shit in the first place by involving me without my knowledge or consent. I didn’t want to be magical, and I sure as hell didn’t want to join their club, especially if it meant people wanting me dead. Living was hard enough without someone trying to kill you.

  On top of that, I’d had another shitty dream. My father – I guess that’s what he was; I mean, does he get to be called father if all he did was sire you and then leave you alone for your whole life? – appeared again. We were walking along some ocean shore – which is weird, because I’ve never been to the coast – and we were chatting and talking like we were old friends. I can’t remember any of the conversation but for one line. He said, “I’m sorry.”

  You’re sorry for what, asshole? For never being there whan I was a kid? For turning me into some magical half-angel and not teaching me what that meant? For spawning a brother I never knew, who hates me for no reason? For deciding I was the perfect person to slay a dragon and getting a contract put out on me as a result? What? What exactly are you sorry for?

  And why is it fair that I have all these questions I can’t ask you, because you’re dead?

  So, yeah, that put me in a foul mood when I woke up in the morning.

  Then of course, there was the whole pain in the ass of being watched by The Order. They had one of their black vans parked outside my complex, with a couple of sword-wielding stooges ready to leap to my aid if this Guild of Assassins or whatever they’re called decided to take another shot at me.

  And Ash said something about them using scrying magic to spy on me in my apartment. If some perv was using a crystal ball to watch me take a shower or sit on the toilet, I was gonna kick me some divining ass. I tried not to think about that too much so it wouldn’t make me uncomfortable, but it was pretty much the first thing that leaped into my head as I sat down for my morning piss.

  When I left for the studio, an Order agent tailed me from about a hundred yards back and then got on the bus with me. He made sure to sit as far away from me as possible so as not to draw attention. But he kept half an eye on me the whole way and changed buses with me as I headed across town to the donjon. Fortunately, he didn’t go in with me. He parked himself outside and called for backup, presumably another unmarked van.

  By the time my first student arrived, I really wanted to beat the shit out of someone. Maybe what happened shouldn’t surprise anyone.

  I was working with Amy Wassenberg, a nice young woman, who was looking to protect herself from unwanted attention. It’s funny the lies we’ve come to believe. People think thieves and rapists are just lying in wait for some innocent, defenseless woman to walk by, so they can pounce on her like lions jumping a gazelle on the Serengeti. The fact is, the vast majority of people who are raped or assaulted or shot know their attacker. Violence is an intimate thing, for the most part.

  I’d successfully convinced Amy that, statistically, she was in more danger from her boyfriend than she was from walking home at night, and she’d become an eager student.

  We were working on a standard purple-belt technique designed to take care of an attacker who puts you in a bearhug from behind. In this scenario, your arms are pinned. I was playing the bad guy, so Amy could practice hammerfisting my groin and then knocking me over.

  “Keep your back straight,” I said. “If you bend over, he’ll end up on top of you.”

  “Okay,” she said.

  Amy was a petite blonde. She probably weighed ninety-five pounds after stuffing herself for two hours at an all-you-can-eat buffet. Definitely not before.

  She tried again, stepping out to her right into a squat, and firing a controlled hammerfist into my cup, followed by grabbing hold. But like she had the previous two attempts, she bent forward when she threw the hammerfist before circling her left leg behind my back to knock me over.

  “Amy,” I said, letting go. “You have to listen. When you hit the family jewels hard and then grab and squeeze, his natural reaction is going to be to move his groin away from you. If he’s bigger than you, which is likely, and you bend over, you may en
d up with him on your back. That’ll knock you down with him on top of you, and then you’re in real trouble.”

  “Okay,” she said, clearly not internalizing what I’d said at all.

  “I’m serious,” I said. “Believe me. You can take a bad situation and make it worse by performing the maneuver wrong. You don’t want to do that. You have to get it right now, so you can practice it correctly.”

  “Okay,” she said again.

  This time she looked more sincere. I nodded.

  “All right, let’s try it again,” I said.

  I got behind her and locked in the bearhug. Amy stepped out to the left and bent over at a near-forty-five-degree angle to throw her hammerfist.

  “No,” I said, letting go. “You’re still bending over. Here, let me show you again.”

  Amy dutifully moved around behind me and put me in a bearhug. As soon as she did, my brain closed down. I was back in front of my complex last night, with the demon holding me so his partner could kill me.

  I stepped out left and hammerfisted Amy hard in the groin. She yelped and unclenched her hands.

  But I was too fast. I swept my right leg around her left and drove my elbow up towards her jaw. Because she’d let go of me, I got lucky and missed with the elbow strike. But she still went over my leg backwards and landed hard on the mat.

  “Ow!” she cried. “God damn it, Sassy, that hurt! What the fuck is the matter with you?”

  My heart beat wildly. I hadn’t intended any of that. I was only trying to show her how to keep her back straight. What the fuck had just happened?

  Before I could explain anything or even think up an excuse, Kai came running over. It’s his studio, and despite the lessons being private instead of in big classes, we’ve got an open floor plan, so he could see the whole damned thing from where he’d been teaching himself.

  “Sassy, what’s the matter with you?” he asked.

  Kai’s a handsome guy. Asian, short hair, perfect almond eyes, and a body that’s cut out of wood. He looked the part of kung fu badass standing there in his black gi and black belt with six gold stripes on it. He’d shown a little interest in me in the past, and I was tempted because he’s the very definition of hot. But sleeping with your boss is a bad idea, and his politics were a shade too conservative for my taste.

  Regardless, I felt like a schoolgirl who’d said the stupidest thing imaginable in front of the hot guy and his friends. I wanted to hide in the bathroom for about six hours.

  “Sorry, Kai,” I said. “I was trying to demonstrate ‘Rising Elbow’, and I was a little too rough.”

  “A little too rough?” Amy said. “You knocked me down hard! I’m lucky I didn’t hit my head!”

  “I . . .” I began, but I couldn’t come up with any more words.

  “I’m sorry about that, Amy,” Kai said. “Tell you what. We’ll comp your lesson for today. I’m sure it was an accident, but I don’t want anyone getting hurt.”

  “Yeah,” I managed. “I don’t want anyone getting hurt. Sorry about that, Amy.”

  She looked mistrustfully at me. Like she couldn’t tell if I was being sincere. I don’t know if I was or wasn’t. I was really confused.

  But it was the first time a student had ever looked at me like that. Like I was someone to be feared instead of someone who knew how to help them. I’m not sure I’ve ever felt worse.

  I offered a hand to help her up. After a second, she took it. I pulled her to her feet.

  “Damn, Sassy, I think you bruised my vaj,” she said. “That’s gonna be hard to explain to my boyfriend.”

  Kai turned crimson at that remark. I suppressed a laugh. I’m not sure Amy would have understood I was amused by Kai, and I know he’d have been pissed.

  “Sorry again, Amy,” I said. “Let’s call it a day. I’ll give you some extra time next week to make up for it. I’m really sorry.”

  Amy studied me for another three seconds. Then she nodded.

  “Okay,” she said. “I’ll see you next week.”

  “Remember to keep your back straight,” I said.

  “Yeah,” she said. “I guess so.”

  She turned and headed for the locker room, limping ever so slightly. Kai watched her go until she’d disappeared into the women’s changing rooms.

  “You want to tell me what happened?” he said.

  “She kept bending forward when she delivered the hammerfist,” I said. “I switched places with her to show her how to do it right, and . . .”

  And what? I went batshit crazy on her, because I’d fucked up a similar technique the night before when my life had been in danger? How did I explain that to Kai?

  “Sassy,” he said, sounding a little too accommodating. “If we hurt the students, they won’t come back. That woman is right at the point where things start to get harder. If you destroy her confidence, she’ll quit. You know as well as anyone how important control is, particularly with novices.”

  “Yeah, I know,” I said. “But really, Kai, we keep telling the women they need to wear cups too, and they never listen. They think their privates are safe because they don’t have balls. Maybe this will help convince her.”

  He folded his arms and stared at me. I tried to meet his gaze, but I couldn’t do it.

  “Are you really going to try to justify this?” he asked.

  “No, I . . . no.”

  He nodded at my acquiescence. Then he stared at me searchingly.

  “What’s wrong, Sassy?” he asked. “You’re not yourself.”

  “Sure, I am,” I said. “Who else would I be?”

  “You tell me,” he said. “Look, the Sassy I know is bouncy and sarcastic. You’re irritable. What’s going on with you?”

  “Nothing,” I lied. “I just slept like shit, and I’m in kind of a bad mood.”

  He continued to stare at me. I still couldn’t look him in the eyes.

  “All right,” he said. “Tell you what: Take the rest of the morning off. I’ll take your students.”

  “No, Kai, I’m fine.”

  “I’ll still pay you. It’s no problem. But take the rest of your shift off. If you’re overtired and in a bad frame of mind, you’re not going to be an effective teacher. And frankly, I don’t need you hurting anyone.”

  I wanted to punch him. The last thing I wanted was my sensei acting all patronizing towards me. But he was right. I needed to clear my head before I taught anyone else.

  Besides, Kai was one of the few people on Earth who could actually kick my ass. It was another reason why I didn’t want to date or sleep with him.

  “Thanks,” I said.

  I headed for the locker room. Kai called after me.

  “Sassy,” he said. I turned back. “Maybe wait to go change until after Amy’s left.”

  I threw him a death-glare, but I obeyed. Once again, he was right. It would be awkward at best if I were in the locker room with Amy.

  Instead, I wandered over to one of the Wavemasters. I spent a few minutes beating it senseless. The aggression felt good.

  Everyone watched me nervously. That kind of pissed me off too. I decided to send a little message. I turned and threw a back-spinning sidekick that landed dead-center. There was enough force to actually knock over the Wavemaster, despite its base being filled with water.

  A lot of the underbelts blanched. I smirked at their reaction. Feeling better, I stood the Wavemaster back up, then headed for the locker room.

  I had no idea how much worse things would get.

  Ten

  W hen I got to the store, we had two shipments that hadn’t been processed yet, and there were several customers. Felicia was helping a guy pick out a new board game, and Ron was talking to a woman about Pathfinder.

  I sighed and grabbed the packing list for the first shipment and started to check it in. I’d ticked off a single cube of dice, when Dave the Creeper walked in.

  “Heeeyyy, Sassy,” he said as he breezed through the door. “Good to see you.”


  “The feeling’s not mutual,” I said without looking up from my packing list.

  “Aw, come on,” he replied. “You know I’m the highlight of your day.”

  I put my pen down, sighed again, and looked up.

  “Dave, I’ve had a shitty day so far, which followed a shitty night. Do not fuck with me today. Go shop for whatever you came for and leave me the hell alone.”

  “Hooo,” he said. “Must be that time of the month.”

  He started heading towards the D&D books. I stood up.

  “No, Dave,” I said. “It is not ‘that time of the month.’ There is never a time of the month when I am glad to see you. You are a creepy, lecherous, misogynist, old man, who smells bad and won’t leave me alone. There is no time of the month where I will ever find that attractive. There is no time of the month when any woman would find that attractive, which is why you’re lonely and sad.

  “I suggest you buy whatever the hell it is you came here to get, go the hell home, take a shower, and start working on how to actually socialize so that one day, some woman your own age might be interested in you.

  “But whatever you decide to do, whether you listen to me or not on this, you will not ever again hit on me, act like we are friends, or blame my general disgust at your wretched ass on my period. Are we clear?”

  Everyone had stopped talking and turned to stare. Dave looked shocked. Ron looked horrified. Felicia was grinning. The other customers looked uncomfortable. Dave turned to Ron.

  “Did you hear what she said to me?” he asked.

  “Of course he heard it,” I said. “Everyone in the damn store heard it. And you’re the only one who doesn’t understand what it means or why I said it.”

  Ron’s mouth opened and closed several times. I could tell he wanted to say something and couldn’t figure out what it should be.

  “I’ve never been so insulted in all my life,” Dave said.

  “Then you either haven’t been listening, or you have a poor memory,” I said. “Cuz that wasn’t even harsh. I can go deeper if you want.”