Dr. Stud

by Jess Bentley

  Russell’s face has gone completely pale. He nods and slowly crawls to his feet without another word. Then he walks out of the barn without making eye contact with anyone, gets in his truck, and speeds out of the drive way. No one says anything for a few minutes, almost as if everyone is frozen in place. Then, of course, it’s Anna who breaks the silence.

  “Gah! I always hated that piece of crap.”

  Everyone chuckles, happy for the break in tension. But Parrish still looks uncomfortable. She turns around and walks out of the barn, and I have to walk twice as face as I usually do to catch up to her. Behind me, I hear Simone call my name, but I ignore her to follow Parrish. Instead of going to the office, though, she heads for the build site, where the concrete is drying and a few of the construction guys are idling around, as if they are waiting for something. She stops short of ending up in hearing distance of anyone, and when I get to her, I can see she’s crying. She quickly brushes away the tears when I stop at her side.

  “I appreciate you standing up for me, Hawk, but did you have to make such a scene?”

  I shake my head. “I didn’t know what else to do, Parrish. He had no right.”

  “Of course he fucking didn’t. But dammit, Hawk. Do you have any idea how hard it is to do my job already? Half the guys I deal with ask to speak to my boss because they don’t believe a woman can run a ranch. The rest insist on talking to your father because they won’t deal with me at all. Now, they’re going to see me as weak, like I can’t handle myself.”

  My shoulders droop. “I’m sorry, Parrish. I didn’t realize. But also, I’m not sorry. There was no way I was going to allow him to get away with that, or keep doing it. And frankly, anyone that questions your ability to run this place isn’t worth your time, or our money. And you should start telling Dad when it happens.”

  She sighs and shakes her head. “It’s not that easy, Hawk. But I really do appreciate your support. Thank you.”

  One of the construction workers, a guy named Sid who was a few years older than me in school, comes up and shakes my hand. “Hawk! Haven’t seen you in years, man. Nice to have you back in town.”

  I shake his hand back, and try to summon up a friendly smile. “You too, Sid.”

  “Listen, Hawk. Do you have any idea where Russell went? We’re kind of just waiting around for some direction on how to move forward from here.”

  Parrish sighs and looks up at the crystal blue morning sky, frustrated. I have no idea what to say. And then, like a superhero descending on a disaster, my father walks up behind us.

  “Sid! My friend. You’re a freelance employee for Russell Edwards, right?”

  Sid looks at my dad, a little confused. “Yes, sir.”

  My father nods. “Good. I’m going to buy out your contract with Edwards for the rest of this project. Plus a bonus. You’ll answer to my son and Parrish, and it shouldn’t change you schedule at all.”

  Parrish steps forward. “Hold on, Sam. I don’t know if we can afford…”

  “We’ll make it work. We can take some money out of the emergency fund. I’ll use my retirement money. I don’t care. But you and Hawk can take over things, plan the rest of the project, the workers will answer to you, and that will be that.” Then Dad turns around and walks away. Sid shrugs.

  “Whatever. So, what are we doing today?”

  I look around at the foundation that’s been laid. “Is the cement dry?”

  Sid nods.

  “Let’s start on the frame. Get as far as you can today and we’ll reassess at the end of the day. How are we on supplies? Do I need to send anyone for anything?”

  Sid looks around behind him and shakes his head. “We’re good to get started. But where can we find you if we have questions?”

  I look at Parrish, who seems to have checked out entirely. “You don’t need to find me at all. Parrish is going to be in charge. She knows everything that needs to be done, has all of the plans, and is just as, if not more, capable of keeping things organized.”

  Parrish turns to me, her face colored with shock. “Hawk, that’s very considerate of you. But you’re an architect. I’m just a numbers person. I can’t make decisions about building issues.”

  “If anything major comes up, you come to me. I’ll be here. But for the most part, these guys know what they’re doing. They know how to read blueprints. All you have to do is keep an eye on materials, and obviously you can bring me in if you have questions.”

  She nods, and Sid just shrugs. “Don’t matter me none! As long as I know who to go to when I need money for more materials. Speaking of, when are the plumber and electricians coming in?”

  “I can have them both here tomorrow. We have a plumber on retainer because of the complications because the well water, the drainage, and the venting systems, and he suspended his normal work to be on hand for this project. The electrician is just waiting for our call.”

  I smile at her. “And you were worried about being in charge? You’ve got this in the bag. I’m going to go finish setting everything up with Dad, and why don’t you take a few minutes to regroup in the office? Then we can meet back up in an hour or so to make sure we’re all on the same page?”

  Sid looks back and forth between us, confused. “Is anyone going to tell me where Russell went?”

  Parrish laughs sadly. “It’s a small town, Sid. You’ll find out soon enough, I’m sure.”

  Sid shakes his head and just wanders away back toward the guys, leaving Parrish and I alone at the edge of the building site. Parrish brushes a stray hair out of her eyes and sighs. “Thank you, Hawk. Really.”

  I squeeze her hand quickly, then pull it away. I don’t want any of the guys to think I’m giving her any special favors because of… I see the same concern reflected in her eyes, so I take another step backwards.

  “No big deal. I’m going to go talk to Dad. Meet you in the office in a bit?”

  She nods, and I turn quickly and walk away, afraid one of us will say something we’ll regret. We seem to have a habit of doing that whenever we’re alone for too long, and I don’t want to ruin any forward momentum we’re managing toward a friendship again. Or maybe something more…

  Stop that, Hawk. Just because you have these feelings for her doesn’t mean she could ever feel that way about you. Just because she’s fallen into bed with you a couple of times doesn’t mean anything. She has a different life now, a life that is nothing like your own.

  I stop and look around the ranch, and take in the place where I grew up, and how much it has changed. Yet, it’s still somehow so much the same. I try to imagine a situation in which I’d come back here, work here, live here. I try to picture making a life here, a new life, a life like the one my father led. And I can’t imagine it.

  But then I realize, I can imagine it. I’m just imagining it happening with Parrish. And that scares the hell out of me. I’m completely lost in the panic of my realizations when I feel a small hand grip my arm gently. I think for a moment it’s Parrish, and I feel my heart swell. Then I turn around, and Simone is standing behind me, batting her eyelashes, and smiling sweetly.

  “Hey, hey… Simone,” I stumble.

  “You are quite the hero, aren’t you, Hawk?” she says as she runs a finger along my arm. I get the shivers, and not for the reason she probably thinks. I know what she’s thinking, and I’m not interested, but I also don’t feel like I can be a jerk to her while she’s still writing the article.

  “I’m not a hero. I’m just doing what’s right. No one should be allowed to treat women like that. It just seems like common sense, I guess. So. I really need to go chat about some things with my dad. I should get on that…” I start to walk away, but she grabs my hand and stops me.

  “Hawk, I’d like to talk to you about something. Something unrelated to the farm.”

  “Ranch,” I mutter under my breath.

  “Whatever,” she says with a wave of her hand. “Can we go out for a proper dinner tonight? In town? I found a ve
gan restaurant in Missoula and made us reservations.”

  My eyes bug out. “Missoula? That’s almost two hours away. I don’t really have time to…”

  “Oh, come on now, Hawk. You can take a little time off, can’t you?”

  I look over her shoulder at the builders, who are already working on the frame. I start running through everything in my head that I need to do, and all of the plans I need to get organized. I also don’t want to spend a night alone with Simone, two hours from my family. So I start workshopping every plausible scenario I could use to get out of it.

  I’m sick?

  I have to build the stable myself with my own two hands?

  I need to drive my mother to her quilting circle?

  Suddenly, the words are just spilling out my mouth. “Oh, shit. I just remembered. I offered to babysit Gracie tonight. I totally can’t. Shoot. Sorry.”

  Simone pouts and crosses her arms over her chest. “Are you sure? Can’t someone else watch it?”

  My nose instinctively crinkles when she refers to Gracie as “it.” But I try to maintain my pleasant facade. “Very sure. I haven’t gotten to spend any time with my niece, so I wouldn’t feel right cancelling, you know? Maybe some other time, Simone.”

  Simone shrugs and tilts her head to the side in an obvious attempt to flirt. “I’ll be here for a while. I’m sure we can find plenty of time to spend together before we leave. And maybe when we get back to Los Angeles too.” She reaches a manicured finger out and taps me on the nose, then winks at me. Luckily, she turns around and heads for the build site before she can see me make a face. Once she’s gone, I head into the house and start brainstorming exactly how I’m going to justify babysitting my niece when no one was planning on going anywhere tonight…

  Chapter 17

  Parrish

  “I don’t understand, Hawk. Why would we go out to dinner when I can just stay here and make dinner for all of us?” Candy asks, confused. To be fair, I’m not sure what is going on either. Once the construction workers cleared out for the day, Hawk gathered everyone in the living room, and told us we were going out for the night. Sam and Candy had reservations at the nicest restaurant in Dylan, and Anna and I were having a girls’ night at the movies. He was going to stay home and watch Gracie.

  “Because. You two never have a nice evening alone anymore. And it seems like the least I can do for you during all of this chaos,” Hawk says as he awkwardly picks up Gracie out of her play castle and tries to engage with her. Gracie looks a little confused at first, but just like she did the first time she saw him, falls for his charms almost immediately. I can see Sam and Candy relenting, but Anna raises her hand.

  “Excuse me. I hate to put a damper on all of this, but I already have plans tonight.”

  Everyone turns and looks at her like she has a lizard growing out of her shoulder. “You have what, Anna? Plans? Actual plans?” Sam asks, incredulous.

  “Yes, Father. Plans. I have a date. With… Sid.”

  Hawk’s jaw drops. “Sid Warren? You’re going on a date with Sid Warren? He’s too old for you!” Anna rolls her eyes.

  “Please. He’s two years older than you, for crying out loud. And I’m not a child. I can go out with whomever I please, thank you very much. I’m sorry, Parrish. As much as I’d love to hang out with you, I can’t cancel on Sid,” Anna says, directing her petulant comment at Hawk. I just shake my head, laughing.

  “It’s fine. Really. I have no problem staying home with Gracie. You don’t have to babysit her, Hawk.”

  Hawk looks panicked, then checks around, as if he’s making sure someone isn’t listening. I have a sudden flash of exactly who he is concerned of overhearing.

  “Why, Hawk Samuel McCormick! Are you using my daughter as a patsy to get out of something?” I ask with my hands on my hips.

  Hawk feigns shock. “What? Me? No! Can’t I just want to spend time with niece and get to know her?”

  “He’s lying,” Anna says, not even looking up from her nails.

  “I am not…”

  “Yes he is,” Candy confirms with a laugh. “I powdered your tush when you were a baby, Hawk. Don’t for a second think I don’t know when you’re lying too.”

  “Ma!” Hawk objects, his cheeks turning red.

  I hold up my hands with a laugh. “This is silly. Sam, Candy, you two go out and have a lovely dinner. Anna, go on your date. Tell Sid I said thank you for his great work today. And Hawk, I will stay home with you and Gracie, but you can do the heavy lifting on keeping an eye on her, so you didn’t tell a fib to… anyone. Does that seem fair?”

  Everyone nods, and Anna jumps to her feet. “On that note, I’m going to go get ready. Sid is picking me up in an hour!”

  Anna disappears upstairs, and Sam and Candy head out for town so they don’t miss their reservation. I look up at the clock and see it’s already late for Gracie’s dinner.

  “Well, Mr. Babysitter, if you’re actually intent on taking care of my daughter tonight. She’s due for her supper. Do you want to cook?”

  Hawk goes pale. “I don’t… I’ve never… I mostly order out.”

  I chuckle. “It’s never too late to learn. Come on.” I wave for him to follow me into the kitchen with Gracie, then point to Gracie’s high chair on the edge of the bar. Hawk stops in front of the sink as if he’s waiting for me to do something, but I just stand there.

  “What… are you doing?” he asks, confused.

  “Waiting for you to make dinner,” I say with a smile. His panic increases tenfold.

  “I wasn’t kidding. I really have no idea what I’m doing.”

  I point to the pantry. “You can make pasta. Anyone can make pasta. Take a box of noodles out of the pantry. Then fill the pot that’s already on the stove with water. Add a little salt, and turn it up high. Then get a jar of sauce from the pantry, put it in a smaller pot, and turn it on medium-low. Once you do all of that, dinner is underway.”

  He shakes his head nervously. “Slow down. Once step at a time please!”

  I burst out laughing. “Holy shit, Hawk. Have you even cracked an egg since you left home?”

  “I hate a lot of ramen in college. Then I started ordering out. I don’t think I have anything in my apartment but corn flakes and some fruit.”

  I hand Gracie a bag of her favorite cereal to munch on, since I suspect this is going to take a lot longer than if I did it. “Well, you’re going to make pasta tonight if it kills us both. Just focus on boiling the water.”

  It takes twenty minutes of patient directions, but finally, the pasta is in the pot of boiling water, and the sauce is bubbling gently. For a second, I consider suggesting he bake the pasta, but then I’m afraid his head might explode. When Hawk dumps the noodles into the colander, he has a look on his face like he’s just solved a complex scientific formula, and I can’t help but laugh at him. I let him put Gracie’s bowl together, then I sprinkle on a tiny bit of cheese and blow on all of it to cool it off, before handing it to her. She digs in happily with her hands, and I don’t make a move to stop her. Hawk reaches for the plates, and I cluck at him.

  “What?” he asks, confused, as he turns around.

  “Oh, honey. We aren’t eating that. I’ll put the leftovers in the fridge for her lunch tomorrow. Your father will probably eat it too. I’ll make us dinner.”

  For a second, Hawk looks wounded. Then, he looks at the jarred sauce and kid’s noodles in the shape of teddy bears and laughs. “Yeah, okay. Maybe you should make dinner.”

  An hour later, Gracie is playing happily in her playpen in the living room as Hawk keeps an eye on her, and I’m plating dijon-smothered chicken legs with broccolini and lemon-scented mashed potatoes. I whistle for him to come in to eat, and he walks in with Gracie on his hip.

  “Where do I put her?” he asks as he eyes the food hungrily.

  “Actually, why don’t you put her back in her playpen? We can eat in the living room and watch a movie or something. Your mother never lets us
eat and watch TV in the house. I feel like being a rebel tonight.” Hawk laughs and takes Gracie back to her play area as I carry the plates out behind him. We sit on the couch next to each other, and Hawk snaps his fingers.

  “We need wine. Can you have wine?”

  I raise an eyebrow. “Why wouldn’t I be able to have wine?”

  He shrugs. “I don’t know. Do young moms drink wine?”

  I laugh hysterically again, so loudly, Gracie looks up from her dolls and starts laughing too, even though she doesn’t know why.

  “Hawk, I’m pretty sure they keep the wine industry in business. Go get us some wine.”

  He disappears and comes back with two glasses of Candy’s best white, and we eat, and drink, and watch Gracie play, and listen to an old black and white movie, and for a second, I think it might be one of the best nights I’ve had in years. I’m just about to finish my food when Gracie stretches and yawns, and says, “Mama. Sleepy.” I go to shovel in my last few bites when Hawk reaches out and coves my hand with his own, sending a thrill up my arm.

  “You eat. I can put her to bed.”

  “But, she needs to be changed, and washed up, and put in her pajamas. She’ll need a story, and you’ll have to sing to her,” I start rattling off her bedtime routine, thinking it will put him off. But he just smiles.

  “No problem. You stay down here and enjoy your dinner. Have another glass of wine. Gracie and I can handle it, right Gracie?” he says as he winks at her. Gracie holds her arms out to him and says, “Hawky!” with a happy smile. I’m sure my face is reflecting my shock, but I don’t object.

  “Well, if you say so. But if you need anything, just yell down. I’ll be right here.”

  He scoffs at me, then picks up Gracie, and they disappear up the stairs. For the first few minutes, I mute the TV and try to listen for any signs of trouble. But all I hear is Gracie is laughing, and Hawk talking to her, so I start to settle down. Once I get a few sips into my second glass of wine, and several bites into a second serving of mashed potatoes, I feel a sense of calm that is relatively new, especially since my baby was born. It’s almost as if I’m truly comfortable with the thought of someone else watching Gracie, and the fact that I feel that way about Hawk of all people is an absolute surprise.