Dispatches from Bitter America: A Gun Toting, Chicken Eating Son of a Baptist's Culture War Stories

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Dispatches from Bitter America: A Gun Toting, Chicken Eating Son of a Baptist's Culture War Stories Page 3

by Starnes, Todd


  "The president believes Congress did the right thing, and his attitude is that any additional money we put into the barbecue industry, any help we provide, is designed to ensure a long-term sustainable industry and not just kicking the sauce down the road."

  Meanwhile, the White House Poultry Czar is considering plans for an unprecedented bailout of the nation's chicken restaurants. Administration officials have named the project "Cash for Cluckers."

  4

  The Day They Burned the Bible

  They burned the Bible.

  In 2008 American troops confiscated, threw away, and burned God's Word at Bagram Air Base in Afghanistan. The Bibles were written in the Pashto and Dari languages, and the Defense Department was concerned the books might somehow be used to convert Afghans.

  The incident became public in 2009. Lt. Col. Mark Wright told CNN such religious outreach could endanger American troops and civilians because Afghanistan is a "devoutly Muslim country."

  But there was another reason the Bibles were confiscated. Military rules forbid troops from proselytizing in the country.

  "The decision was made that it was a 'force protection' measure to throw them away because, if they did get out, it could be perceived by Afghans that the U.S. government or the U.S. military was trying to convert Muslims," Wright told CNN.

  For the back story, read this account from the American Forces Press Service:

  A report broadcast by the Arab news network Al Jazeera about U.S. service members proselytizing in Afghanistan is just plain wrong, Pentagon officials said today.

  The Al Jazeera story showed an evangelical religious service on Bagram Airfield in Afghanistan and a discussion about distributing Bibles that had been translated into Dari and Pashto—the two major languages of Afghanistan.

  "American service members are allowed to hold religious services," a Defense Department official speaking on background said. "The clip shows one of those services with an American chaplain leading a religious service for American service members. In it, he spoke generically about the evangelical faith. That's all there was to it."

  The chaplain did not urge service members to go among the Afghan people and attempt to gain converts to Christianity, the official said.

  In the second instance, a young sergeant received a shipment of Bibles translated into Dari and Pashto from his church in the United States. The film showed a discussion about the Bibles. "What it did not show was the chaplain counseling the young sergeant that distributing the Bibles was against U.S. Central Command's General Order No. 1," the official said. The chaplain confiscated the Bibles. "As far as we know, none ever got off base."

  Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Navy Adm. Mike Mullen was asked about the incident—which happened in May 2008—during a Pentagon news conference today. "It certainly is—from the United States military's perspective—not our position to ever push any specific kind of religion, period," Mullen said.

  There is no indication disciplinary action was taken against the young service member. "The counseling sufficed," the official said.1

  So that explains why the Bibles were confiscated and thrown away, but why burn the Holy Scriptures?

  Lt. Col. Wright explained to the news network that troops at posts in war zones are required to "burn their trash."

  The words I would like to write on this page at this moment are unprintable.

  Trash.

  Trash.

  I can only imagine the anguished Christian soldiers who were forced to toss the Bibles into the roaring fire. I can only imagine what they were thinking as the blaze consumed verses like John 3:16—"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life" (KJV).

  I can only imagine the heartache of the American church that collected the Bibles and sent them overseas to share the good news of Jesus.

  So why not just collect the Bibles and send them back to the United States?

  The military told CNN they considered doing that. But they worried the church would send them to another organization in Afghanistan, and that would give the impression the Bibles were distributed by the U.S. government.

  In other words, the only way to guarantee no Bibles would be found on Afghan soil was to destroy the books.

  So how did the Obama administration respond to the revelations of such a horrific act? Allow me to list their responses in chronological order:

  This page is intentionally blank.

  There's no need to adjust your reading glasses. The previous page is blank for a reason. There was no condemnation from the Bush White House in 2008 or the Obama White House in 2009. There was no condemnation from the State Department. There was no condemnation from the Pentagon.

  Perhaps that's to be expected from an administration that believes the United States of America is no longer just a Christian nation.

  And that brings us to the story of a tiny church in Florida that decided to burn the Koran.

  Reverend Terry Jones generated monster headlines when he announced his intention to burn the Koran. Jones pastors the Dove World Outreach Center, a congregation of about fifty people in Gainesville, Florida.

  The nondenominational church planned to host an "International Burn a Koran Day" on the ninth anniversary of the September 11, 2001, terrorist attacks. The protest called Islam a religion "of the devil" and invited others to remember the 9/11 victims and take a stand against Islam.

  The reaction from the Obama administration was swift and heavy laden with adjectives.

  President Obama called it "contrary to our values as Americans." Attorney General Eric Holder Jr. condemned the plan as "dangerous" and "idiotic." And as The Washington Times reported, General David Petraeus warned that burning the Koran would inflame religious tensions and endanger American troops.2

  The State Department called the church's actions "un-American" and inflammatory. The commanding general of U.S. forces in Iraq, Lloyd Austin III, and Ambassador James Jeffrey called it "disrespectful, divisive, and disgraceful."

  Secretary of State Hillary Clinton said, "Acts of disrespect, hate, and intolerance do not represent the American way of life we support and defend and do not reflect the shared values and mutual respect that unite Americans and people of the Middle East. Such provocative acts are an insult to the American tradition of religious tolerance, serve only to fuel and incite violent extremism, and may place the lives of military and civilian personnel serving in the region at greater risk."

  And while many Christians would rightly oppose this Koran-burning spectacle on many levels, what stands out is that when I compare the Obama Administration's handling of the dueling book burnings, only one word pops onto my laptop—"hypocritical."

  A poll conducted in 2009 by OneNewsNow showed most Americans believed the U.S. government was acting hypocritically by burning the Bible. More than 60 percent believed that "if it had been the Koran, this would never have happened." More than 52 percent of Americans believed the Bible burning was a sign of appeasement toward Muslim countries, and more than 27 percent called it a sign of religious hypocrisy.

  "There's really a staggering level of hypocrisy and double standard here for the military to burn the Holy Bible and then complain when a pastor's going to do the same thing to the Koran," said Bryan Fischer, director of issues analysis at the American Family Association. "You know, if the military was going to be fair here and even-handed, they would count up the number of Holy Bibles that they incinerated in Afghanistan, and then they would allow Reverend Jones to burn the same number of Korans."

  But something else has been bugging me about this mess. Why is the Obama administration involving itself in the affairs of an American church anyway?

  "It is regrettable that a pastor in Gainesville, Florida, with a church of no m
ore than fifty people can make this outrageous and distrustful, disgraceful plan and get the world's attention, but that's the world we live in right now," Clinton was reported as saying in The Washington Times. "It is unfortunate; it is not who we are."3

  What's regrettable is the secretary of state involving herself in the affairs of a Christian church. Mrs. Clinton may not be aware that most Americans would see the burning of the Bible as an "insult to the American tradition of religious tolerance."

  Most Americans consider flying airplanes into buildings to be an insult to the American tradition of religious tolerance. Most Americans consider massacring American troops at Fort Hood to be an insult to the American tradition of religious tolerance. Most Americans consider trying to blow up a jetliner in Detroit on Christmas Day to be an insult to the American tradition of religious tolerance.

  Am I right? Hypocrisy.

  "[Certainly] the armed forces should be sensitive to people's religious symbols or their text," Lt. Col. Bob Maginnis (USA-Ret.) told OneNewsNow. "I said at the time [of the Bible burning] that I thought people would go ballistic if the armed forces were to burn Korans.

  "Instead of burning the Bibles, there is no reason that they shouldn't have returned them to those who purchased the Bibles," he continues. "But we recognize that in a Muslim country, Christians are just not welcome. The hypocrisy is pretty well established. It is disconcerting."4

  I was a member of my church's Awana program when I was a little boy. Through Awana I developed a love for the Bible. I memorized dozens of passages of Scripture, tucking away treasured words from God into my heart. That's why I'm so troubled by what happened in Afghanistan.

  And that's why I feel compelled to summarize this sad chapter of American history by sharing a passage from the New Testament.

  "Jesus wept" (John 11:35).

  5

  The Pentagon vs. Franklin Graham

  The son of Billy Graham was banned from the Pentagon's National Day of Prayer over statements he made about Islam after the September 11, 2001, terrorist attacks.

  Franklin Graham was invited to speak by military chaplains in 2010. But his invitation was rescinded when Muslim groups complained that Graham called Islam an evil and wicked religion.

  "True Islam cannot be practiced in this country," Graham told CNN in 2009. "You can't beat your wife. You cannot murder your children if you think they've committed adultery or something like that, which they do practice in these other countries."

  Graham refused to apologize for remarks he made in 2001 and in 2009, leading to outrage among pro-Muslim groups and some Muslim military personnel.

  "Speakers such as Franklin Graham reflect a message of religious intolerance, rather than the more American message of differing faiths united in sharing support of our nation's founding principles," Corey Saylor, a spokesman for the Council on American Islamic Relations, told AOL News.

  Mikey Weinstein, with the Military Religious Freedom Foundation, told AOL that Graham is an "Islamophobe, an anti-Muslim bigot and an international representative of the scourge of fundamentalist Christian supremacy."1

  The military quickly rescinded Graham's invitation, noting that his presence at the prayer service might be seen as inappropriate for a government agency.

  "We're an all-inclusive military," said spokesman Col. Tom Collins. If that's the case, then why did they exclude Franklin Graham?

  Shirley Dobson heads the National Day of Prayer Task Force and defended Graham's participation. "Suggesting Mr. Graham should be removed from a National Day of Prayer event because of his religious opinions is absurd," she said. "No one understands better the need for prayer at this critical juncture in our nation's history.

  "Moves to exclude any member of this great family from this prayer event represent everything that is wrong with the agenda of political correctness that is rampant in our country," Dobson said. "Our nation's founders wouldn't have tolerated it, and neither should we."

  But Graham hasn't been the only Christian leader targeted by the Pentagon. Tony Perkins of the Family Research Council was scheduled to speak at a national prayer event at Andrews Air Force Base. However, the FRC president was "disinvited" over his opposition to the repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell."

  Perkins condemned the decision to ban Graham from the Pentagon prayer event. "Franklin Graham is a man of courage and integrity whose deeply held biblical convictions should not be a pretext for denying him the opportunity to share the gospel," he said. "The fact that he has theological differences with Islam, differences wholly in keeping with the teachings of the New Testament, and that he has expressed them publicly, is now being used by anti-Christian zealots in a manner offensive to the freedom of religion guaranteed by the very Constitution military leaders are sworn to uphold."

  Perkins' blistering attack continued: "This decision is further evidence that the leadership of our nation's military has been impaired by the politically correct culture being advanced by this administration. For those Christian leaders who have avoided the controversy of political issues, saying they just wanted to preach the gospel—this should be a wake-up call."

  And that's why Georgia Congressman Jack Kingston demanded that Congress investigate the Pentagon's treatment of Christians. "Rescinding the invitations to people as high profile as Franklin Graham and Tony Perkins sends a huge message downstream to all the military chaplains that certain sermons are no longer going to be welcome in the Pentagon circles," Kingston told me. "If you want to get along, you have to go along."

  Kingston said Christianity is treated like a "redheaded stepchild" in the nation's capitol and blamed political correctness for the bans on Graham and Perkins.

  "If the military says, 'Look, God is no longer welcome; we just want good thoughts by military chaplains,' well that's fine," Kingston said. "But let's have a congressional decision on the matter."

  Kingston said military chaplains are also under attack in the Pentagon. The Republican represents a district with four military installations, and he said it's evident there is an aversion to Christianity in official religious services.

  "I can tell you the prayers are really no longer prayers," he said. "They are just good thoughts for the day, inspirational messages. But they have very few references to the Lord and you will never hear 'In Christ's name we pray.'"

  Former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin gave a vigorous defense of Graham on her Facebook page: "It's truly a sad day when such a fine patriotic man, whose son is serving on his fourth deployment in Afghanistan to protect our freedom of speech and religion, is disinvited from speaking at the Pentagon's National Day of Prayer service."

  Congressman Kingston suspects the anti-Christian attitude in Washington is not just limited to the Pentagon.

  "The president declared we are no longer a Christian nation," Kingston said. "At best he has a lot of religious ambivalence himself. We're going to have to realize that the Commander in Chief isn't going to stand there for the traditional Judeo-Christian celebrations and observations. At the same time we can't let one person take that away from our history and our traditions in America. The only way that's not going to happen, though, is the people in the pews are going to have to stand up and speak out."

  Kingston said Christians should be concerned about recent developments at the Pentagon and that the nation's capitol has almost become a "religion-free zone."

  "If Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid think this is a good thing, let them come out of the closet and say so," he said. "Let's not let this decision be made by Pentagon bureaucrats."

  Now, friends, did you ever think you would see the day evangelical preachers would not be welcomed at the Pentagon?

  6

  Chickens Have Rights, Too

  NEW YORK CITY—A federal jury has convicted renowned journalist Todd Starnes of the mass genocide of chickens. Starnes was the
first American tried under a new federal law that gives animals the right to sue human beings.

  Starnes, who once declared that the only good chicken is a fried chicken, faces twenty-five years in prison. His punishment could have been worse. However, since he only ate white meat, prosecutors were not able to charge him under federal hate-crime statutes.

  The jury, made up of a dozen barnyard animals, also found him guilty on aggravated assault charges. According to investigators, several of his victims were battered before being deep fried.

  People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals hailed the ruling.

  "We proudly stand alongside our poultry brothers and sisters," said a PETA spokesperson. "America's chickens can roost in peace tonight. Their clucks have been heard."

  The star witness for the government was Cass Sunstein, the president's livestock czar widely credited with giving animals the right to sue humans—a move that led to the arrest of Starnes.

  "Human's willingness to subject animals to unjustified suffering will be seen as a form of unconscionable barbarity," he said, quoting a speech he delivered in 2007 at Harvard University. "It's morally akin to slavery and the mass extermination of human beings."

  However, Starnes had several high-profile witnesses in his corner. Among them the Chick-fil-A Cow, who placed his hoof on the Bible and swore to tell the truth.

  "Eat more chicken!" the bovine declared, bringing an immediate objection from the prosecution and swift condemnation from Judge Rabinowitz.

  "Hate speech against poultry will not be tolerated in this courtroom, not even from a bovine," said the visibly angry judge.

  One of the more emotional moments came when Earl the Chicken's widow took the witness stand. She described their life together on the farm and how he taught his chicks that the early bird always gets the worm.

 

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