Erin's Way

by Laura Browning

  Rick shook his head. “Seriously, girlfriend, you are wasted here on the farm. Do you know, once I got you hooked up with that software to read to you, your investment advice turned me into a millionaire in six months? Let’s set ourselves up someplace sunny and warm and you can make us all a pot load of money.”

  Erin grinned and took another hit. If she left with Rick and Matty, she could be herself. No pretense. They knew exactly who and what she was. She didn’t have to live up to some blueblood, by-the-book life that required the right education followed by the right marriage. Best of all, they demanded nothing from her. God! It was so tempting.

  Except she wouldn’t see Sam. Erin pushed that thought away. Sam didn’t want her. He’d told her over and over. Was she so weak and pitiful she would stick around to have him kick her like she was some unwanted stray?

  At some point, Matty broke out a bottle of rum. They played strip poker and did shots between hands of cards.

  “My two pair beats yours because I have jacks high and you only have tens!” Erin told Matty. She slammed her shot glass down and waved her hand imperiously. “Off with your shirt!”

  Matty stood up and made a production of unbuttoning his shirt and letting it slide slowly from his shoulders as he shimmied back and forth. While he looked at Erin, the show was really for Rick’s benefit. Erin laughed, stuck her fingers into her mouth, and let out a loud wolf whistle. She smacked him on the ass and winked at Rick.

  “Hands off the merchandise,” the captain drawled, a twinkle in his eyes.

  They were all completely smashed and down to their underwear when the pounding started on the door. Rick picked up Erin. As she giggled and squirmed, he dropped her on the bed beside Matty, who had already passed out.

  “I’ll get it.” With one last look at Erin, who was laughing at him, he weaved to the door. Even though he was over forty, Rick’s body was lean, muscled, and tanned. His sun-streaked hair fell around his shoulders, and he had tiny gold hoop earrings in each ear. Erin grinned. All the women loved Captain Rick.

  He opened the door just a crack. Over his shoulder, Erin saw two dark-haired giants looming outside the door, one lean and sardonic looking and the other about the size of an angry grizzly with an expression equally welcoming.

  “We’re looking for Erin Richardson,” her brother said.

  Rick swayed a bit. “And whom shall I say is calling?”

  “Her brother,” Evan growled.

  This was not going to be good. She should probably get up, but it was more fun to snuggle in the bed and watch what was happening.

  Rick, with years of experience bluffing his way out of tight places, looked to Sam, who was doing his best grizzly bear imitation. “And who might you be?”

  “Castle County Sheriff,” Sam said in a voice as fierce as his expression.

  Ohhh. Sammy sounded mad. He seemed to react that way around her a lot. Maybe it was just her who made him angry all the time, but Erin shoved that thought away. She wanted only happy thoughts.

  “She’s indisposed at the moment. Perhaps you could come back later?”

  Erin couldn’t suppress a giggle, thereby ruining the excuse. Over her shoulder, she watched Matty, who had come back to life, pick up her poker hand. She swatted at him ineffectually.

  “No cheating!” she scolded.

  “You are such a wicked girl,” Matty purred. “Of course your jacks and aces will beat his hand and he’ll lose his boxers. Maybe you can get the two hunks at the door to play too.”

  “I doubt it.” Erin laughed as she heard Evan say, “Now Sam…”

  She turned back to the tableau at the door just in time to see Sam’s fist smash into Rick’s nose, followed by the door slamming backward against the wall. Sam stomped into the room, his eyes going even blacker when he saw Erin next to Matty in just her underwear. Something tugged at her consciousness. What, Erin wasn’t quite sure, but she scrambled from the bed and bent over to search for her shirt under the bed.

  “Get up!” Sam bellowed. He hauled her to her feet where she swayed before she covered her mouth with one hand and delicately hiccupped. She smiled at Grizzly Sam. “Sammy! I love you.” She looked back at Matty. “This is my friend Sammy,” she slurred. “Do you know he didn’t want to see my tattoos?”

  She tried to look over her shoulder at the one on her butt and stumbled slightly. “Matty, the one on my butt looks okay, doesn’t it? Sam doesn’t like my ass, but you do, don’t you?”

  Matty grinned as he looked at her butt. “Sure, honey gir1! I’ve seen a lot of asses and yours is perfect!”

  She turned back to Sam’s outraged expression. “See, Sam. Matty thinks I have a nice butt.” She giggled and fell forward into his arms. She’d caught him off guard. A series of quickly disguised emotions came and went on Sam’s face as fast as storm squalls before he glared at Matty.

  “Get me a blanket and get her clothes together.”

  Evan handed Rick a towel for the blood. “Pinch your nose, asshole,” he mumbled, then spoke in a voice dripping with ice and loud enough it could probably be heard through the whole motel. “She’s tried so hard to get off the booze and the drugs, and the first thing her friends do is get her stoned and drunk. Well, listen, you two! He’s the sheriff and I’m the fucking county prosecutor. There’s enough pot smoke hanging in here that I’m sure just a quick search would find us enough to land both of you in jail for quite a while, but I’d like to spare my sister, so when we get Erin out of here, you get dressed, check out, and stay out of this county. This ain’t your vacation paradise, and we take a dim view of strangers coming in and messing with family.”

  “Is that a threat?” Rick asked.

  Evan paused and stared at him out of narrowed gray eyes. “No. It’s a promise. Leave my sister the hell alone. She has enough problems.”

  Matty stood with Erin’s clothes and her purse, and looked Evan over contemptuously. “It’s always looked like to us that most of her problems came from her family. You didn’t even know…”

  “Matty!” Rick snapped.

  Matty shut his mouth and thrust Erin’s things at Evan. “Here.”

  Sam had her wrapped in a blanket from head to toe and cradled her against his chest. “Let’s get out of here.” He stared hard at Rick. “Sorry about the nose.”

  * * * *

  When they reached Evan’s SUV, Sam set Erin carefully on the rear seat, then climbed in after her. Evan slid in behind the wheel as Sam pulled Erin onto his lap and held her. She stirred and snuggled in closer to him with a contented little sigh. Sam found her smiling at him. “Did you meet Rick and Matty? They’re my friends. That’s Captain Rick. I love him too… and Matty. He helped me get away from Andre.”

  She leaned her head against Sam’s chest. “They love me. Not like you.”

  Sam’s arms tightened around her, and he stared morosely out the side window. Not love her? She infuriated him. She had knocked him off balance since the first time he had picked her up at nine years old. She fascinated him, amazed him, enthralled him, and made him want to slay dragons for her. Not love her? He’d wanted to kill those two men with her! He still did.

  “Hush, baby,” he rumbled. “Whatever you say and do now will likely come back to haunt you later. We’ll get you sobered up. Then you can tell me how much you hate me.”

  When Sam noticed they were not headed back to his farm, he looked at Evan’s reflection in the rearview mirror. “Where are we going?”

  “I’m taking her to Jenny. She can get her showered and examine her. If either one of those assholes took advantage of her, I’ll press rape charges.” Evan snarled. “The whole situation just hits too close to home, Sam, reminds me too much of the way Jenny’s father set her up so he could break us up years ago. Jesus, what if they…”

  He didn’t finish as he turned the SUV into his drive and pulled to the back of the house. Sam carried Erin inside. Jenny was in the kitchen starting dinner. When
she saw Sam with a blanket-wrapped Erin, her eyes widened with concern.

  “What happened to her?”

  Sam frowned but was saved from explanations when Evan said, “She was in a hotel room with two men who’d gotten her drunk and stoned. I want you to examine her, Jen. I’ll press sexual assault charges if I have to.”

  Jenny’s mouth tightened. “Follow me to the guest room, Sam. Let me have her clothes, Evan. I’ll take care of her if you’ll go ahead and cook dinner. You’ll join us of course, Sam.”

  He laid Erin on the bed, and started to straighten when Erin murmured, “Don’t go, Sammy.”

  “It’s okay, baby. Jenny’s going to help you.” He touched her short hair gently. “I’ll be right downstairs. I won’t leave you.”

  Sam returned to the kitchen to find Evan chopping vegetables. Sam leaned against the counter.

  “That is so domestic, Evan.”

  “Fuck you.”

  The knife chopped rhythmically, but with enough force, Sam realized Evan was still venting pent up anger. Sam could relate to that. He rubbed his reddened knuckles. Punching that guy in the nose had felt extremely satisfying. Before he could contemplate how much better he would feel if he could do it again, Jenny returned to the kitchen and punched him in the gut.

  Sam let out a big oomph. “What the heck? What was that for?”

  Jenny glared at him. “For being an insufferable prick.” She turned to Evan. “There is no reason to file any charges against her friends.”

  “They didn’t do anything? You’re sure?” Evan’s voice was still filled with suspicion.

  Jenny smiled. “As sure as I am that Joe is a preacher.”

  She left the room once more, and Sam looked at Evan in frustration. “That’s all the information we get?”

  Evan nodded and went back to chopping.

  Finally Sam asked, “Doesn’t it bother you that she knows a lot more than she tells?”

  Evan sighed. “All the time, but I respect her for it, even if I don’t like it. She wouldn’t be much of a doctor if she didn’t keep some things to herself. I’d say Erin obviously told her something about you that pissed her off. Care to share what you’ve been doing to my sister?”

  “Not a darn thing,” Sam said indignantly, “not that it hasn’t…”

  He clamped his lips tightly before he could say anything else and stared at his big feet.

  “Not that it hasn’t what, Sam?” Evan asked softly.

  “I told her I wasn’t interested,” Sam said stiffly.

  “And are you?” Evan inquired.

  “Yes. No! It would never work.”

  “Never say never, Sam.” Evan laughed, a dark, evil sound that made Sam nervous.

  * * * *

  The euphoria of Erin’s pot and alcohol high had quickly evaporated, leaving her dragged down and depressed. As she stood beneath the spray of the shower, she thought back over what she’d shared with Jenny. Her brother certainly hadn’t pulled any punches in how seriously he was treating her hooking up with Rick and Matty.

  Right off the bat, Jenny had said, “Evan wants to know if you’ve been raped. Did those men touch you?”

  It had struck Erin as funny. She’d stared at Jenny for a beat, then giggled. “I’m the last person Rick or Matty would touch. Evan and Sam were in more danger than me!”

  Jenny’s brows shot up; then she started laughing as well. “Oh God! They’re gay? Well then why are you only in a bra and your thong?”

  “We were playing strip poker. I was winning too, damn it. I had a full house, aces over jacks, when they knocked.” She’d giggled. “I’d have had Rick’s boxers next. Um, Jenny, don’t say anything, you know, about Rick and Matty being gay. They don’t advertise it. Well, Matty kinda does. He’s pretty effeminate.”

  Jenny smiled. “So I can assume you are still…?”

  Erin hiccupped. “As virginal as ever since Sam doesn’t want me.”

  Jenny had plopped next to her on the bed. “Do you want him?”

  Erin cringed now as she thought back on what she’d revealed. And then she’d just made it worse.

  “Yes. No! He’s mean and he hates me. He said he didn’t want what so many other men had already had. I’d be crazy to want him.” Erin sniffed. “Where’s the bathroom? I’m going to be sick.”

  Jenny had helped her to the commode, then into the shower. Erin was mortified. As the water continued to run over her, she knew she would have to face Sam and her brother when she got out. Could someone stay in a shower forever?

  Erin was quiet as she dressed again in her own clothes. It amazed her how quickly a person could go from falling down drunk to stone cold sober. With sobriety came humiliation. Her face burned. Sam and Evan had seen her nearly naked and falling down drunk. Had she really told Sam she loved him? Oh God. Then asked Matty about her ass? How on earth could she possibly face Sam or Evan again?

  “Come on, Erin,” Jenny said quietly from the doorway. “You can’t hide here.”

  “I’m so embarrassed.”

  “We’ve all done stupid things at some point.”

  Erin looked up then, an expression of self-loathing on her face. “Some of us keep doing them. Oh, Jenny,” she whispered, “I told Sam I love him.”

  Jenny put an arm around Erin’s shoulders. “Don’t worry. Nobody believes what you say when you’re drunk. You need some food and some fluids.”

  When they entered the kitchen, Erin raised her chin stubbornly even as she averted her gaze. “I’m sorry if I embarrassed any of you in any way.”

  Evan came over and held her by the shoulders. “Are you sure you’re okay, honey?”

  She closed her eyes. Protecting Rick and Matty’s secrets would make her appear even worse, but she owed them, especially Rick. “They’re friends, Evan. Anything that happened was by mutual consent.”

  “Erin…” Jenny began.

  She lifted her chin a little higher. “They’ve seen me in less than that before,” she lied.

  Evan and Sam’s mouths dropped open.

  “Erin,” Evan began. “This area isn’t like the Virgin Islands. People aren’t as relaxed about some things.”

  It sounded remarkably similar to what she had tried to tell Rick and Matty, but she wasn’t about to admit that. Erin stared at him. “Worried about your reputation, Mr. Prosecutor, or mine? ’Cause if you’re worried about mine”—and now she looked directly at Sam—“people already think I’m a drug-addicted slut. I can hardly go any lower in their estimation.”

  “Erin,” Sam began, his voice low and gravelly sounding, but she spun on him.

  “Do you both have to gang up on me all the time? Do you think I haven’t already had a lifetime of people pointing out everything I do wrong? You didn’t have to go live in D.C., Evan. I did. It was like living in a fishbowl all the time. Daddy’s name was always tied to the phrase ‘potential presidential candidate,’ so we were under constant scrutiny. If I said the wrong thing, wore the wrong thing, combed my hair the wrong way, it was in all the gossip columns… And everyone in school delighted in throwing it in my face.”

  When Evan tried to touch her, she stepped back and wrapped her arms across her waist.

  “It didn’t take long for me to become a prime target for all of them. Senator Stoner Richardson’s troubled teenage daughter. And all I ever saw in Mama and Daddy’s eyes was how tired they were of me. I was a liability. Even sitting on the bench for UVA you were more of an asset than I was. When they were finally able to ship me off to college, they looked relieved. Do you have any idea how that feels, Evan?”

  Jenny started to reach out to her, but Erin backed away from the contact. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to grow up as the only idiot in a family of freaking geniuses? Even now… You’re married to a doctor. I discover a bastard half sister who turns out to be another Georgia O’Keeffe and so squeaky clean she’s married to a minister who sings like an angel.” She b
egan prowling, scarcely aware of how her fingers danced across surfaces as she walked.

  “Then there’s me, Evan,” she whispered. She stared at him, feeling the humiliation of not living up to standards that had always seemed to be a little higher than other families. “The idiot who can only land jobs as a cook or a lifeguard. Oh, and now I can add shit shoveler. How does that stack up against your resume, bro?”

  She continued to prowl the room, restless and agitated, before she stopped and stared at Sam accusingly. “The only person who ever really bothered to look at me as a person, you punched in the nose. And you and Evan both told him to leave. Rick knows me, knows my faults, and still likes me. That’s almost unheard of for me.”

  “Sit down,” Jenny said softly, but firmly. “You need to eat something, Erin, and get some fluids in you. I don’t think now is the time to discuss all this.”

  Erin looked at her sister-in-law, and some of her belligerence faded. “You’re right, Jenny. I don’t want to talk about this. I spend most of my time trying not to think about it at all, but since coming back here, it seems like all I ever do.”

  By the time Erin and Sam returned to his farm, he was frustrated and irritable. She could tell by the way he stalked to the mudroom door. As he held it for her, he growled, “I’m sorry I punched your friend.”

  Erin stopped, staring at him incredulously. “That’s it? That’s your apology?”

  Sam pulled at his already short hair. “It made me crazy. You’d disappeared.Then there you were, almost naked with those two guys. I lost it. Okay?”

  “I’m safe with them.”

  “Are you?” Sam asked. “How the heck am I supposed to protect you if you invite people here to pick you up?”

  “Am I a prisoner here?”

  That stopped him. With one hand on the back of his neck he stilled, his dark eyes intense, his brows drawn together. “No. That’s not what I want, but I need to be with you or know you’re some place safe.”

  “Oh, so it’s like being grounded. How quaint.” Erin shook her head. “I’m going to bed.”

  She felt his gaze on her. As she crossed the living room, she heard the unmistakable sound of a liquor bottle rattling against the edge of a glass. Great. Now she was driving even Sam to drink. Erin was desperate for the oblivion sleep would provide. This day had been far too long already.