Hannaford Prep: The Complete Series

by J Bree

  When the song ends he plays it again and I smile down at our feet, mine still covered by the uncomfortable kitten heels girls are required to wear and his only covered by the skulls he has tattooed on him. The bright yellow carnations trapped in the teeth of the skull seem to glow against the shades of black and gray depicting the bone. The same skulls were on his first EP and I loved the artwork so much. The ink only makes me grin harder.

  “Don’t ask about the tattoos, it’ll only push me to drink.” He groans and wiggles his toes as we arrive to the door.

  I shrug. “I’ll take a stab at it and say your dad. Yellow carnations aren’t exactly the norm to find on album covers so I looked them up. Disappointment and rejection. Didn’t make sense to me back then but now I know what a dick your dad is I get it.”

  I fish out my keys but Blaise grabs my hands and leans down until our noses brush one another. I stop breathing.

  “Stop me now, Mounty, or I’m going to kiss you. No pity, no ulterior motives, just a kiss because I can’t stop myself.”

  My brain just ceases to exist and I tilt my head up to meet his lips halfway. This kiss is nothing like the last one, no hesitance in either of us, and when I suck his bottom lip between my teeth he grunts and slams me into the wall next to my door, his hand cradling the back of my head, preventing the concussion I’m positive that move would’ve given me. Thank fuck Hannaford is built out of solid stone and Avery can’t hear us thumping around out here as I drag him closer, hands fisted in his shirt, and groaning into his mouth. He parts my legs with his knee and presses against me until I see fucking stars. I’m so fucking wet that I’m sure he can feel it and I’m desperate for him to touch me.

  He breaks away and I take a second to let go of his shirt.

  I clear my throat. “I can’t.”

  He nods and presses his forehead against mine. I feel his answers brush across my lips. “I know. I’m being a selfish dick. Just do me a favor and don’t tell Avery?”

  I nod. I don’t need to tell him that I’m not talking about the Jackal’s threats. I’m talking about my stupid heart that I need to protect as fiercely as he protects his because when I had nothing at all in this world I still had myself. I can’t afford to give pieces of me away to spoiled rich boys looking for distraction.

  I can’t think about Blaise or the kiss.

  I can’t think about anything except the massive workload I have in all of my classes and the concert I’ll be singing at that’s creeping up on me. When summer break starts, I’ll take a few weeks to figure out what the actual fuck is going on with Harley, Ash, and Blaise so I can start my junior year without boy drama.

  I tell myself this over and over again to get through my classes and it works. I’m sitting in math when my phone vibrates in my pocket and I secret it out to see what Avery needs. My stomach drops.

  It’s done. I’ll collect my diamond when you get home.

  I try to shake off the unease that settles deep in my gut but it takes root. He’s getting more and more short with me. I’ve pissed Matteo off and now he’s addressing me only as the Jackal. Old fears creep up my spine and bury themselves into my brain like shards of glass. I remind myself that this is necessary, that separating myself from the Jackal is the first step to finding freedom and safety, but it’s like losing my security blanket at the same time as ridding myself of the monster under the bed. He’s evil, he’s twisted and psychotic, and he’s the only family I have left. He’s cared for me since I was nine years old. He’s abused me, broken me, snapped bones and destroyed me. He’s had my back in every single situation I’ve been in as the Wolf. I can’t think of Matteo without thinking about the Jackal.

  I sigh and then startle when I feel a hand tuck into mine. The teacher is still droning on and on about the interpretation of exponential models. Harley hasn’t looked away once, his pen moving rapidly as he takes notes, and yet he’s noticed I’m freaking the hell out. He’s holding my hand, rubbing his thumb over my skin gently and threading his fingers through mine. I squeeze gently and he squeezes back before I move my hand and get back to taking my own notes. Fuck, maybe I am as bad as Annabelle say. Kissing Blaise one night then swooning over Harley holding my hand the next.

  When the class finishes, I clear my throat and say, “We need to eat all of our meals in the dining hall together today. All of us. I’ve…had something taken care of and we need to be there to see it.”

  Harley just nods and grabs his phone out. When my phone pings I know he’s told the others to join us.

  I don’t know how to act now that he’s casually, discreetly, touching me. When we head to the dining hall he moves me to walk in front of him, so I don’t get bowled over by the stream of students bustling around us, and rests his hand on my lower back. The heat of his palm burns through my blazer and shirt, and it feels like a brand.

  He grabs us both lunch and then scares off the juniors in our seats with a single look. Before I take my seat I look up and down the table to find that Joey isn’t here yet. Good. I want Avery to see his reaction.

  Ash arrives next and he leaves a seat between us for Avery. He quirks an eyebrow at Harley who only shrugs in response. I dig into my food so I won’t be forced to speak to them. Avery and Blaise come in together, laughing and joking, and when they sit with us Avery murmurs quietly into my ear, “Today?”

  I nod and she seems to pull herself to sit straighter and more regally. Ash watches us both but doesn’t comment. We’re nearly finished when the door flings open with such force that it bounces off the wall.

  I don’t look up. I know who it is and what’s eating his ass.

  Avery’s leg tenses against mine and she hisses, “Fuck, here he comes. He looks fucking murderous, Lips. He looks like Father does right before he backhands me, fuck.”

  Swearing is never a good sign from Avery. Her eyes are wide and I can see the tremble in her fingers as she picks up her knife and fork from where she’s dropped them. I try to set a good example and I start in on my own plate of pasta, steady and sure. They taste like ash on my tongue but I need to look convincing for her.

  “Remember what I said. He's effectively neutered. Don't engage with him.”

  Harley and Blaise share a look. Ash gives me a hard look of his own and hisses under his breath at me, “What the fuck does that even mean?”

  He’s panicking. I feel bad that I didn’t give him more warning and I don't have time to answer him now. Joey slams his palms onto the table in front of me so hard the china and silverware rattles dangerously. Silence falls over the dining hall. Some of the freshmen around us begin to collect their things and leave, eager to get away from Joey’s wrathful presence. There isn’t a person in the school who doesn’t know what he’s capable of.

  “Who the fuck do you think you are?” Acid drips from his words but I'm not afraid of this asshole, I’ve survived worse than him. I am worse than him in all the ways that count and now I have him on a very short leash. I slowly put down my knife and fork and then I cross my arms over my chest. When I meet his gaze the manic in his eyes is wildly present. His tight control has slipped and now the drug addict is clearly visible for the world to see.

  “Let me tell you how this is going to go from here onwards, Joseph. You will not speak to me, your siblings, your cousin, or Morrison. You will not speak about us. You won't plot, or scheme, or belittle. You will not raise a hand. You’re going to pretend we don't exist. If you come across one of us in the halls you will avert your gaze and walk the fuck away. Am I clear?”

  Joey’s breath is heaving out of his chest like he's running a marathon and his eyes are wild and darting around the room. Withdrawals are a bitch. I’d watched my mom go through this a hundred times so I know just how much his skin is crawling. I know just how frayed his nerves are. Fuck him. I hope it burns.

  “The Jackal sends his regards,” I say and I make sure my tone is even, low, placid. Then I pick my fork back up and dig back into my breakfast.

&nbs
p; The room is holding its breath.

  Joey roars and turns on his heel. He shoves a couple of juniors on his way out and whispers start up all around us.

  “What the fuck just happened?” Blaise says, and I look up to see all three boys gaping at me. Avery looks smug as fuck but I know she's dying to spill to them how I did it. I give them the watered down version.

  “Joey likes three things. I couldn't touch his money that will take more time than we have. I couldn't kill him without risking Ash. That left his addiction.”

  “Holy shit. You cut him off. You cut him off?!” Blaise yells.

  “There isn’t a dealer in the state that will sell to him now.”

  Ash and Harley share a look while Blaise gapes at me.

  “How the fuck does a Mounty have that much pull?”

  I smirk at them but Harley’s mind is already working. He’s too smart. He’s book smart and street smart, common sense and imaginative thinking all in one devastating package. “Fuck. You used a favor.”

  I nod slowly, staring straight into his eyes and ignoring the looks around us. He lets out the breath he was holding and rubs his neck.

  I pitch my voice low so no one around us can hear. “I used one to save you. One to get Senior out of the way until graduation. Now I've used another to cut Joey off. I don't regret it and I'd do it again. We’re all getting out of this alive, even if I have to call in every favor I have. That's why I have them.”

  Avery's hand slips into mine. Ash is blinking at me like I've sprouted fucking wings and Blaise is frowning at us.

  I tuck back into my food, ignoring them until they’re forced to find something else to talk about.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  The last week of classes before exams is so hectic I forget about Joey completely.

  My bad leg has a flare up from how hard I push myself, and my lack of sleep. Every morning I wake up with it feeling worse than before. I see the nurse but she refuses to give me anything stronger than aspirin for it.

  My tutoring sessions with Blaise become a free-for-all with everyone showing up and Avery ordering take-out so we don’t have to stop to cook.

  Harley insists on walking me back to the room every night and sitting next to me as we study, even though Ash is technically my tutoring student and Harley is on par with me. When I question him he looks at me like I’m mentally compromised so I drop it and give in without any further questioning.

  I focus myself entirely on my exams because if I think about my choir performance I lose my stomach contents, which Blaise learns the hard way by asking me which song I’ve picked only to have me spew in the bathroom sink. Avery throws a textbook at his head and cusses him out. No one talks about choir after that.

  I practice with Avery and she tells me over and over again how good I am. I know that should be enough to calm my insane nerves but I go to sleep each night with a sense of dread.

  I’m picking swimming next year.

  I wake up on the morning of our choir performances with dread lying heavy in my gut. The same amount of dread I imagine a person on death row would feel the morning of their execution. Avery nearly strains her eyes she rolls them that hard at me when I tell her.

  The flare up in my leg only gets worse and I find myself walking gingerly to each of my classes. Harley watches me carefully and starts to snap at any other students walking around us if they get too close to me. It’s sweet and I find myself very glad he’s decided we’re friends.

  I refuse to eat all day and instead drink eight cups of coffee until finally Harley notices the tremors in my hands and narks on me. Avery hides the coffee and stalks me so I can’t have anymore. What a bunch of assholes.

  The tremble is a full body case of the shakes by the time I get to the chapel. It’s full of students and various bored-looking teachers trying to corral them into some semblance of quiet and calm. I spot Harley and Ash straight away because they’ve cleared the bench around them for us to join them as we finish. I must look miserable because Avery tucks her arm in mine and Blaise slings a casual arm over my shoulders. I don’t even have the mental capacity to enjoy the feeling. I could definitely vomit on my shoes right now and I wouldn’t even care, it would not bother me in the least.

  Because Miss Umber hates me, truly despises me I’m sure of it, she saves me for last. Avery goes first and sounds great. She’s got a decent range, clear tones, and hits the notes she needs to. I clap with everyone else even though we’re behind the curtain and she won’t see. Blaise is third so he finds us a quiet spot to sit and then keeps me tucked under his arm until he has to move. When Miss Umber calls him he gives me a little squeeze and then heads out.

  He’s amazing.

  The girls behind the curtain swoon and pant after him. I crawl out of my miserable fog for long enough to glare at them a bit, not that I blame them. I hope Avery has taken a video of it for me to enjoy later because I’m too fucking nervous to function right now. I breathe and center myself until all of my chaos is contained inside my head and not plastered over my face for everyone to see.

  I watch as, one by one, the girls all disappear until Miss Umber is calling my name.

  If my scholarship didn’t ride on this assignment I would leave.

  Fuck.

  I slip one of the earplugs into my ears as I walk up to the microphone on stage. I don’t look at the crowd. I don’t even look at Avery. I wait until they start the song, to count myself in, before I slip the other earplug in and the silence in only broken by the thumping of my own heart. I fix my eyes onto the rose colored glass on the far wall and then I sing.

  Weeks and weeks of practice.

  So many sleepless nights stressing about this moment.

  I fucking love it.

  I lose myself in the mechanics of singing and I give it everything I’ve got. I pour sixteen years of anger, frustration, longing, and loneliness into my voice and when I feel the tears pick at the back of my eyes I don’t even care that I’m on a stage for the entire school to see.

  I push my luck and reach up to loosen one earplug just a fraction so I can hear just a little of my song. I’m fucking incredible. My hand shakes a little but I push through and finish the damn song, hearing every word I’m singing. I feel invincible.

  I know in my broken and bent bones I’ll sing without fear someday.

  I step away from the microphone and duck my head so I don’t have to look at anyone while I’m feeling so exposed. I feel raw, like my soul has been torn open and splayed out for all of Hannaford to see.

  I faintly hear the applause as I move to the side of the stage and I pop out the earplugs. Avery is yelling, “Yes bitch!” at me like a lunatic and I let out a weak chuckle. Stepping down from the stage, I walk over to sit beside her on jelly legs, adrenaline riding me hard. She looks so elated that I've managed to sing the whole song without shitting myself and I grin back at her. All three boys gape at me, mirror images of shock.

  “That was perfect. You should have seen how Blaise looked when you opened your mouth,” Avery whispers in my ear. I fight the blush that threatens to bloom over my entire body.

  I exhale and settle into my chair to watch as the first of the band students walks out with a cello and sets up. It's quiet for a second and then Blaise and Harley start bickering.

  “Move,” says Blaise.

  “Fuck off. You've just decided to do something about it because she passed your little singing test?”

  “Don't be a jealous dick and move. I need to tell her-”

  “You'd have to climb over my dead fucking body and we both know I could take you. Now shut up before you get us in the shit.”

  What the hell? Avery is grinning so hard her face might split open when I look past her to the others. Ash has his arm linked with hers and he's staring ahead like he can't hear the war happening next to him but I can see the nerve twitching in his cheek. Harley’s face is flushed with anger and he looks over at me. I don't recognize the emotion in his eyes
and I'm worried he's pissed off at me again. I've just barely managed to negotiate a ceasefire with Ash, I don't want something else to start up in its place.

  I fidget my way through the rest of the performances and when Mr. Trevelen finally dismisses us I’m feeling the effects of skipping food all day. When my stomach rumbles Avery sighs at me then turns to the guys. “I’m making dinner, are you coming up to eat with us or are you hitting the dining hall?”

  They agree to come up and nervous flutters start deep in my stomach. My leg is still aching and when we all stand to leave my knee buckles and gives way. I manage to catch myself on the bench and when I stand again Avery wraps a hand under my elbow to support me.

  “You know how I tell you not to buy me shit? If a new leg is on the table, I'll take it,” I say through clenched teeth. Avery rubs my back with a little smile and helps me to hobble out of the auditorium. I must look pathetic because Ash wraps a strong arm around my waist and pulls me into his body tightly. It takes me a second to remember exactly how to breathe when I feel the hard lines of his body against mine. I hear Harley begin to grumble behind us.

  “What happened?” Ash murmurs.

  “My leg just likes to remind me that violence is never the answer.”

  Ash chuckles under his breath and my legs start to wobble for an entirely different reason. He looks down at me and the concern is easy to see. I’m so fucking confused.

  “I’ll be fine, I just need to get off my feet for a few days.”

  He nods and Harley pries Avery off of my elbow so he can support the other side of my body until I’m pretty much being carried by the two of them. Avery stares at each of the guys, one by one, like she’s going to stage an intervention. When she opens her mouth Blaise tucks her under his arm and pulls her to lead the way. What the sweet fresh hell is going on?