Innocent Tears

by Iris Blobel

  Flynn was just short of a year older than Sarah. Since that kiss she had placed on his cheek, he had been divided in his urge to make it big in Melbourne, or anywhere but Tasmania, and his ever-growing love for Sarah.

  He had taken her out for a picnic that day near a creek in the forest. A beautiful spot outside Launceston. It had been their favourite spot since Flynn received his driver’s license and was allowed to use his mother’s old car. They talked about everything that came to mind. Sarah complained about school, and Flynn dreamt about going to university, getting a law degree, and making it big in one of the main cities.

  “Flynn, you wouldn’t go without me, would you?”

  Of course he wouldn’t. When he looked at her and took in her contagious smile, he knew all he wanted was to spend the rest of his life with her. “No way would I ever go anywhere without you.” He lay on the rug and propped up on his elbow. “I promise.”

  She gently touched his face. “You know I’m not made for the big city.”

  He found himself tenderly tracing a line to her chin. “I’ll look after you. You’ll be fine. More than fine. You and me taking on the world in the big city and living the good life.”

  There was a reluctant smile on Sarah’s lips. Flynn moved closer to her, slid his hands over her shoulder and up her throat. He kissed her, and slowly laid her down as he kissed each single inch of her body.

  His knees almost gave way beneath him at the memory of Sarah’s skin under his touch, the taste of her lips and the fragrance of her hair. In a sudden outburst of anger and frustration, Flynn threw his cup into the corner of the balcony. Sliding down along the railing until he sat on the floor, he pulled his knees close to his chest and propped his arms on his legs. He stared blindly ahead – the life he was living had come at a high price.

  The phone rang and Flynn ignored it, but he slowly stood up and gazed again over Port Phillip Bay where the sun kissed the water and would soon disappear into the night. All he had ever wanted was to make it in one of the capitals. The answering machine clicked on, and as he listened to his mother’s voice he wandered through his apartment.

  Hello, love. Sorry we missed your call earlier, but we went out with the Robinsons to celebrate their anniversary. Do you remember the Robinsons? Never mind. Anyway, I will try again later on. I’m going to take a quick shower now. Love you very much, and we hope the call was about your intentions to visit us here at the coast.

  His lips curved into a stiff smile. Nope, it wasn’t about him coming to the coast. In fact, he had shelved that idea and had come up with a different one.

  Another phone call. It was his assistant, and he quickly grabbed the receiver.

  “Joyce?”

  “Sorry, Flynn, for calling so late.”

  He pressed the heels of his hand against his eye. “That’s all right. What’s up?”

  Joyce went through some business details and Flynn agreed to come in early to catch up with work. Half a day off and the files were piling on his desk. Shoot!

  “Joyce, one more thing? I’ll take tomorrow afternoon off as well.”

  She let out a big sigh. “I take it you’d like me to reorganise all your appointments?”

  He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Yup. Much appreciated.”

  And he hung up. He rubbed his temple with his fingers, then pushed the speed dial button. He interrupted Joyce in her answering speech.

  “Me again. How old is your granddaughter?”

  His assistant was slightly taken aback and answered hesitantly, “She’s turning five in August.”

  “Could you organise me a little present for a six-year-old girl for tomorrow morning?”

  “Flynn, would you care to tell–”

  “Joyce, could you do that for me?” he asked with a quiet, but desperate, firmness.

  “Not a problem. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  7

  The sun was on its best behaviour and slipped from behind a cloud, giving warmth to the autumn day. Emma and Nadine had walked over to a nearby park, which had a small playground. The apprehension on Nadine’s face was forgotten right away as she enthusiastically climbed the slide and mingled with a few other children.

  They stayed for a while, and when Emma stood and came closer, her little friend asked, “Can we stay a bit longer here?”

  Instantly, guilt pressed down on Emma’s shoulders. Taking Nadine to the playground seemed a reasonable idea at the time, but now as she looked into those despondent green eyes as it was time to return to the hotel, she wasn’t all that sure anymore. “I’m sorry, honey, but it’s time to go.”

  Nadine’s face reflected the obvious disappointment. “Okay, then.”

  She picked up her bag from the park bench and then looked at Emma. “Do you know my dad?”

  “No, honey, I don’t. I saw him yesterday when he came to see your grandma and grandpa. But that’s it.” And boy, oh, boy was he a treat for the eyes!

  With her voice sounding wary, Nadine asked, “Do you think he’ll like me?”

  Emma kneeled next to her and held both Nadine’s hands. The right words escaped her, and she had no idea what to say. Her heart ached looking into the girl’s eyes. Admiration towards her grew more and more. “Honey, I honestly don’t know, but I can’t see a reason why he wouldn’t. You’re a gorgeous young girl.” She tucked a strand of hair behind Nadine’s ear. “He’s probably just as afraid as you are at the moment. Afraid of having a little girl all of a sudden.”

  Nadine threw her arms around Emma’s neck and sobbed. “What if he doesn’t like me? Then I have nobody to look after me.”

  A knot formed in Emma’s stomach. “Naddie, honey. Of course he’ll like you, and you will still have your grandparents.” Emma gave her a long hug before taking her hand. “Let’s get to meet your dad. I’ll be with you all the way.”

  The girl wiped the tears with the back of her hand. “Promise?”

  “Pinky swear.” They both hooked up their little fingers and pulled. And a hesitant smile returned to Nadine’s face.

  Once they returned to the hotel, Emma spotted Flynn in the lobby straight away. How could she miss him? He sat in the corner near the window, sunlight reflecting on his hair. Dressed again in a neat business suit, his sunglasses on top of his head, he seemed to stare into the distance. The way his hands fiddled with a plastic bag, she assumed he was just as nervous.

  “There he is,” she said to Nadine as she leaned down to her face.

  They both walked towards Flynn who must have had an idea the girl was his – he followed each of their steps as they came closer.

  Emma’s knees grew weaker with every step. What if she couldn’t say a word, either? My, he looked gorgeous. She took Nadine’s hand and stopped in front of Flynn, noticing how the girl moved more and more behind her. “Flynn McCormack?” Emma asked.

  * * *

  * * *

  Surprised, Flynn turned from the child to the young woman. “Yes.”

  “How are you? I’m Emma, and this is–” she pointed at Nadine, “–this is Nadine. I’ve been looking after her and I was asked–”

  Ignoring Nadine’s companion, he kneeled down in front of the girl and rested his arm on his leg. “Hey, little Muffin!”

  “Hi.” Nadine’s reply was shy, nothing more than just a whisper.

  They both looked at each other.

  “Are you my dad?” Nadine asked with slightly more voice, but still hiding behind Emma.

  Flynn nodded and replied with warmth in a voice that came straight from his heart. “So it seems.” He just couldn’t get his eyes off the small child. No doubt she was Sarah’s child. He choked back a smile. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, indeed.

  Flynn stood up and went back to his chair and took the small parcel out of the bag he'd left there. Then he returned and crouched down in front of Nadine again.

  He gave her a wrapped box. “Buying presents for girls is new for me, so I hope you like it.” Okay, he f
elt odd, and he knew he owed Joyce big time for this, but how was he supposed to know what young girls liked?

  Nadine let go of Emma’s hand and hesitantly came out from behind her. She took the box with both hands and looked at Flynn. “Thank you,” she whispered.

  As he watched her inspecting the present he took in every possible detail of her reaction. He had no idea what was hiding behind the wrapping paper, but hoped she would like it. Actually, his rapid beating heart told him, he was more than hoping, he was very keen for her to like it.

  Flynn stood and for the first time acknowledged the woman. He held out his hand. “Flynn McCormack. Nice meeting you.” He frowned. “Do I know you?”

  She shook his hand. “I’m Emma. You left your message for Mrs. Gibbs with me yesterday. I’m an employee at this hotel, but have the pleasure of looking after Nadine at the moment.” He noticed her blushing slightly as their hands touched, and a smile tugged at his lips.

  Nodding, he looked back to Nadine as her eyes widened in excitement when she discovered a doll box underneath all the paper.

  “I hope you like it.”

  She nodded eagerly and then looked at Emma. “Look, this is the new fairy doll.” Her face beamed. “Thank you!”

  Flynn smiled, and even more so when he noticed the missing teeth. “You’re welcome.” Then he turned his attention to Emma again. “I assume you will join us for this afternoon.”

  Emma moved her hand over Nadine’s hair. “I hope you don’t mind.”

  He moved his head side to side. “No, not at all. I might actually need some help. I’m not sure how much you know, but until twenty-four hours ago, I had no idea of Nadine’s existence.” As soon as he had said the words he sighed inwardly. It wasn’t him to blurt out details like that. Especially not to people, or in this case, a young woman, he didn’t even know.

  He noticed her soft touch on his arm. “You’ll be fine,” she said quietly. “She’s just adorable.”

  Flynn looked back at Nadine and took a long deep breath. “How about we have something to eat? There’s a nice restaurant–”

  Emma gave a few fake coughs and though initially confused he paused but then backtracked.

  “–or even better I’m sure you know a nice place to get some yummy fish and chips at the beach?” she finished his sentence carefully.

  He stared at her for a long moment, until he figured a restaurant was probably not the right place to take a little girl. His brain went into overdrive. Where to go with a small tod? He thought of Sarah and kneeled down again. “–but then again your friend here’s right. How about some fish and chips or a burger at the beach?”

  Nadine’s face lit up. “Can we?”

  “I think it’s a great idea. Perfect weather. Let’s just get scissors to free this doll out of the box.” Emma turned to Flynn. “We’ll be back in a second.”

  With a nod, Flynn jammed his hands into his pockets and rocked back on his heels, watching as the two of them walked towards the reception desk.

  8

  They took the tram down to St. Kilda. Excitement was written all over Nadine’s face as the tram made its way passed the tall buildings and through the wide streets, until they arrived at their destination. The unsteady motions of the tram made the girl giggle, and she wasn’t able to take her eyes off all the different sights. Flynn watched her with amusement. The country bumpkin taken to the big city. They walked along the foreshore and Nadine told them that her mum had taken her to the beach often. Flynn’s heart ached as he looked at the girl, desperate to ask about her mum. They found a pleasant fish and chip shop where Flynn bought a bit of everything and some drinks.

  Out of the corner of his eye he caught Emma’s gaze on him as he casually took his shoes and socks off and stepped onto the beach with the fish and chips in his hands. The day was near perfect – no breeze and no heat. It had been way too long since he had enjoyed a picnic by the water. Way too long.

  “I’m sorry about your suit,” Emma said as Flynn sat down on the grass.

  He shrugged. “Not to worry about. It’s just a piece of clothing.”

  Nadine sat close to Emma and placed her doll next to the food.

  Flynn couldn’t help but smile. He took a chip and said, “So Nadine, tell me about your mum?”

  Apparently the wrong thing to say! Emma raised her eyebrows and slowly moved her head side to side as if to say ‘What are you doing?’

  “Ask her about herself,” she whispered as she pointed at Nadine.

  Flynn raked his hand through his hair. This was going to be harder than he expected. Then again, what had he expected? He took a sip of his lemonade, all the while staring at Emma. Every sign told him she was nervous. He wondered why? Wasn’t it him who had become a father overnight and had no idea how to handle this situation? With a stranger who kept… Bingo! She might be nervous thinking that she’d overstepped her mark by disagreeing with him all the time. But what on earth was he supposed to talk about to a little girl?

  “Hey, muffin, how old are you?”

  Not looking up, Nadine quickly replied. “Six.”

  “A pretty young girl already, eh?”

  Nadine managed a small, tentative smile and then looked to Emma, who encouraged her to tell him about her doll collection, and why she truly liked his present.

  Cautiously, Nadine started to tell him about her dolls and fairies, and when he in turn told her about the few boy dolls he used to have as a little boy, there was no stopping her. Not once was he bored or restless. Flynn hung to every word his young daughter had said.

  “So I suppose when you come and visit me, I’d better make sure I have a few fairy movies for you.”

  Nadine’s face lost the excitement. It was just like a slap in his face to see her smile fade away. She moved closer to Emma. Questioningly, he met Emma’s gaze, but she just shrugged. She didn’t seem to know either.

  * * *

  * * *

  When they returned to the hotel later that afternoon, Flynn thanked Emma for her help and then kneeled down again in front of his daughter. His daughter!

  He touched the tip of her nose lightly with his finger. “It was nice meeting you,” was all he could think of. “Hope you will come and visit me soon again?” He would have given anything for a hug, but after mentioning the movies, he wasn’t actually sure whether that would have been a smart idea.

  “Thank you,” Nadine said, and took Emma’s hand.

  “Nadine.” They all turned around and saw William coming towards them.

  The girl smiled and ran towards the old man. “Grandpa!”

  “I’d better get going,” he heard Emma saying as he followed her gaze — Teresa Gibbs was just leaving the lift.

  Flynn gave her a smile. “Two days and you’re running from her already?”

  Emma blushed. “No–”

  He winked. “Don’t worry about it. Everybody else does, too.”

  They walked over to Mrs. Gibbs, and Emma agreed to catch up with Mrs. Gibbs later. Flynn looked after Emma. There was something about her, and he wished for only a few minutes in private to talk to her.

  “How did it go?” Teresa asked.

  Flynn shot her a look and choked back a laugh. “How did what go?”

  “Your meeting.”

  “For crying out loud, Teresa. Is that what you call it? A meeting?” He shook his head, a wave of disapproval rising within him. He glanced over to the girl and warmth spread through him as he watched her holding William’s face with her hands. The two of them obviously enjoyed each other’s company.

  Teresa touched his arm. “Flynn?” she asked with an unusual soft voice.

  “Hmm?” Not moving his eyes from his daughter.

  “We’re going back to Launceston tomorrow night. We told Nadine she’d stay here with you for the holidays so you two can get to know each other until you take over full custody.”

  What the…? He shot her a glare, anger now replacing his previous wave of disapproval. D
id she, by any chance, have any more bombshells she was going to drop on him? He was sure if they hadn’t been surrounded by all these people he would have strangled her. There and then.

  * * *

  * * *

  Emma tried to wipe her sweaty palms against her pants. She was nervous, and as she watched Leo Morgan signing a few more documents for his assistant she wished the last two days had been a dream.

  “Miss Gallagher.” He turned to her and Emma wasn’t able to read the expression on his face. “Let’s get this sorted. A bit of a mess that you have created.”

  A tense silence surrounded them. What was she supposed to say? “Yes, sir”? Or “It wasn’t my fault, sir”?

  “Emma?”

  “Mr. Morgan, I honestly don’t want to lose my job. I honestly cannot explain what made me agree to all this and all of a sudden–” She told him the whole story about Mrs. Gibbs needing a person looking after her granddaughter, Emma’s problems not finding anyone and then feeling intimidated by Mrs. Gibbs and agreeing to do it. And following her first few hours with the little girl about Mrs. Gibbs contacting him before asking Emma to help out a second time.

  Once she had summed up the events of the previous days, the room fell into an awkward silence again.

  A tentative smile curved his mouth. “I’ve heard about your willingness to help.” He hesitated as he leaned forward and rested his arms on his desk. “But in all fairness, Miss Gallagher, I cannot allow staff to just wander off for one and a half hours to babysit. Not to mention others having to cover for you. Even though I can see that Mrs. Gibbs might have been intimidating. I found myself in a similar situation,” he added with a soft voice.