I LIKE THE WAY YOU HURT: A Dark Interracial High School Bully Romance

by Lorrain Allen

  “All the kids do.”

  “Screw them.”

  Kayla lifts her eyebrows in surprise, and then laughs.

  “Kayla, I promise to not give up on you. I promise to help you improve your grades. I promise to give you my all. The only thing you have to do is promise to give me your all. Can you do that?”

  “Yes.”

  “Let’s shake on it.” I hold my hand out to her.

  We shake hands, sealing the deal.

  “Okay, now let’s tackle these fractions.”

  I reflect on the time I spent with Kayla while having dinner with my mom and Michael at home.

  “Cocoa.”

  “Hmm.”

  “You seem distracted.”

  “I’m thinking about Kayla, about how I can better help her.”

  Since relocating to this town, I’ve sort of felt like an outcast, but I’m resilient enough to make the best out of my situation, but Kayla needs guidance.

  “Mine too, honey. She’s such a sweet child and so shy, but you can help her come out of her shell.”

  “I plan to.”

  “I think it’s great that you’re taking her under your wing. It’s very noble of you to volunteer your time,” says Michael.

  “Thanks, Michael.”

  “How’s school going?” he asks.

  “Good,” I reply too fast.

  “I’m sorry that I haven’t been able to show you the ropes, or really see you at all in school.”

  “It’s fine.”

  Since Michael is a tenth-grade teacher, his class is in a different wing, which I really like. He’s a great guy, but I don’t want to see him all day in school, then at home, too. On the rare occasion that I do see him in passing, we wave to each other.

  Later that night, I call Saint as I lie in bed, missing my old school and friends in Los Angeles.

  “Hello.”

  “It’s good to hear your voice,” I tell him.

  “Aww, you miss me?” Saint asks playfully.

  “I do, I miss Lo and Micah, too,” I say, my voice starting to waver. I’m trying hard not to cry as I blink tears away. I’m stronger than this.

  “What’s the matter?” Saint asks.

  “I didn’t expect my senior year to be like this. Most of the kids here are assholes, some are even racist. I made a few friends, but it’s still not the same.”

  I tell him about the fried chicken incident. I don’t tell him about Maverick, because I know he’d come here. I don’t want him getting arrested because of me.

  “What the fuck? You stood your ground and that’s what matters. She won’t fuck with you again.” All playfulness is gone from his voice.

  “The look on her face was so hilarious. She did not expect that punch.” I laugh, my mood changing.

  “I’m going to come visit you real soon.”

  “Promise?”

  “I promise.”

  “Is there anything new going on with you?” I ask.

  Saint and I catch up for about an hour then I go to bed.

  The next day at school, my peers barely even look at me. I guess that punch I delivered to Victoria yesterday has everyone nervous. The two minions are in school today, but I haven’t seen Victoria. She’s most likely at home, nursing her war wound. Serves her right; she’ll think twice about fucking with me again. When I arrive to physics class, in true Maverick fashion, he doesn’t acknowledge me when I take my seat.

  “I’ve decided to do the project on my own,” I tell him. It’s not like I have a choice, anyway. I can’t force him to work on the project. “When the project is done, I’ll type up some notes for you to look over.”

  We’ll have to present the project together in front of the class. He still doesn’t say a word. I hope Mr. Barnes doesn’t pair us together on any more projects.

  During lunch, my new friends dampen my mood.

  “We cannot go to that party,” says Jamal.

  “If we’re seen at that party, we’ll have to transfer schools,” adds Lucy.

  Kate nods her head in agreement.

  I throw my hands up in frustration. “No one from this school has the balls to go so who's going to see us there? No one will find out. Let loose and have fun. Since enrolling in this school, have any of you been invited to a party that one of these snobs had?”

  They all shake their heads no.

  “Do you really want to finish your senior year without going to at least one house party?”

  They shake their head no again.

  “So, let’s go and have some fun.”

  They reluctantly agree.

  Yes. I won this round. I’m going to look sexy as fuck on Saturday night.

  Cocoa’s hair looks so soft and beautiful. It’s the same color as her skin and eyes, a rich caramel color. In physics class, I could smell the sweet fragrance from her hair. It took a lot of self-control not to bury my face in it and breathe deeply. I saw a few appreciative glances turn her way. I want to fucking hate her so bad, but another part of me just wants her. But I don’t know how not to destroy—it’s in my nature. John ingrained that hate in me, and even though I hate him, it’s still hard to let that learned behavior go.

  It’s Saturday night, and I’m getting dressed while dancing around in my room to Beyoncé’s “Freakum Dress”, because I’m definitely wearing my freakum dress that barely covers my ass. My hair is styled in big curls around my face. Of course, I’m wearing my signature red lipstick, mascara, eyeliner, and silver eyeshadow. I opted to wear my glitter mini tube dress since it’s still warm out. The weather hasn’t cooled too much yet since it’s only mid-September. I pair my dress with black strappy stiletto heels with rhinestones.

  About forty minutes later, I have the three amigos and our destination is Jake’s party. I’m driving, but Lucy will be our designated driver tonight because I plan to get wasted. After the party, we’re having a little sleepover at my house. Jake lives an hour away, so we should be there around 9:00 p.m. Jake lives in a picturesque neighborhood with the white picket fence and all that. The house he lives in is a good size. Nowhere near as large as the house where Maverick lives though.

  Why the fuck would I think about him?

  Jake may not be as well off as some of the snobby kids at Montgomery Academy, but no doubt his family has money, too.

  Once I find a parking spot, we leave my car.

  “Damn, you look hot, hot, hot,” says Jamal as he takes my hand, twirling me around to get a good look at me. I didn’t leave the car when I picked him up, so he didn’t see my complete outfit

  I pull my hand from his grasp and do a catwalk to the front door. I look good, and I fucking know it.

  I enter the unlocked house first. We follow the music downstairs to the basement. Underage drinking, illegal drugs, and explicit dancing is the name of the game tonight. Jamal looks like he’s in his zone, but Kate and Lucy look petrified. I find Jake and the two boys he was with at the mall. I walk over to them. They’re talking among each other, so don’t notice my approach.

  “Hey, Jake.”

  He’s speechless for a moment as he looks me up and down, and a slow smile spreads across his face. His friends look dumbstruck as well.

  “Hey Cocoa, I’m glad you could make it. You look great.”

  “Thank you. What does a girl have to do to get something to drink around here?”

  “Follow me, the keg is in the back.”

  Jake grabs a solo cup off the table beside the keg and fills it to the brim for me. I empty my cup in a few gulps. Jake’s eyes nearly fall out of their sockets in surprise.

  “I want another.”

  When he hands me the refilled cup, I grab his hand, leading him to the makeshift dance floor in the middle of the room.

  I face him, wrapping my left arm around his neck while I hold my drink in my right hand. His hands circle my waist then slide down to grip my ass. I’m not a virgin, and it’s been a long while since I had sex, so maybe I should have a little f
un tonight. I’m not looking to be serious with anyone because, once I graduate, I’m leaving this awful town, but fun I can do. He puts his leg between my thighs, so I grind against him. He places a few soft kisses on my neck before kissing my lips.

  Dee, Nix, and I are playing pool in my game room. I invited a few members of the in-crowd over for a small get together. Lori and Rebecca are here, but I guess Victoria’s face is still fucked up, so she doesn’t want to be seen.

  “Holy shit,” yells Rebecca from the sofa.

  I turn towards her as she holds her phone out to Lori.

  “I knew she was a slut,” Lori says, gleefully.

  “Who?” asks Dee.

  “That mutt, Cocoa. She’s over at Jake Donovan’s house dancing on him like she’s a bitch in heat,” says Rebecca.

  I walk over, snatching Rebecca’s cell phone from her hand.

  “Hey, watch it,” she protests.

  Cocoa is riding that motherfucker’s thigh while they kiss. I see red. Dee and Nix are looking at the live video on Facebook over my shoulder. I don’t say anything. Rebecca’s cell phone clatters to the floor when I drop it. I practically run to the garage with Dee and Nix are hot on my heels.

  “What are you going to do, Mav?” asks Dee.

  “I’m going to kill that son of a bitch.”

  “Why Mav? Don’t drive all the way over there. You don’t even like this girl,” says Nix. “Right?” he asks after a few seconds.

  I don’t answer him, because I don’t know the fucking answer to that question.

  “You can’t go starting a fight in a Louisville’s neighborhood. We’ll be outnumbered,” says Dee.

  “I’m not asking you to go.”

  “Mav, you know we’re down. We just don’t want you to do anything stupid.”

  Stupid is my fucking middle name.

  I hop in my jeep and start the engine.

  “Mav think about this,” Dee shouts while standing by the driver’s window.

  I push the button in my jeep to open the garage door. I put the gear in drive and step on the gas.

  “Damn you, wait Mav. We’re going, too,” Dee says, jumping in the seat behind me as Nix slides into the front seat.

  I drive like a fucking maniac.

  “Slow the fuck down Mav, you’re going to get us killed,” yells Nix.

  I make it to Jake’s house in forty-five minutes.

  I open the door before my jeep comes to a complete stop. I put the gear in park, but I don’t bother to turn off the engine or close the door when I leave the jeep. I run up to the porch, pushing the door open with such force that the door bangs against the wall.

  I follow the loud voices and music to the basement door. I run down the steps two at a time. When I reach the bottom, I zero in on Cocoa, and she’s still dancing. Her back is facing me. Both arms are wrapped around the fucker’s neck as she undulates against him. His hands are gripping her ass in that barely-there short ass dress she’s wearing, with those fuck-me high heels. They’re practically sucking each other’s face off.

  “Calm down, Mav,” says Dee, from beside me.

  I notice that Dee is gripping the baseball bat that I keep in my jeep. When I reach Cocoa, I grasp her shoulder, ripping her from Jake’s hold. She hits the floor hard. I punch Jake in the stomach and then his face. He falls against the wall. Cocoa moves to my side.

  “What the fuck are you doing, Maverick?” she yells at me.

  She moves towards Jake, but I stop her with a hold on her wrist. She shoots me a pissed off look.

  Everyone has stopped what they were doing to watch this drama unfold. Jake is on his feet now, blood dripping from the corner of his mouth.

  “What the fuck are you doing here, Maverick? You’re not welcome here.”

  Matt and Joe flank Jake.

  “Trust me, you don’t want a fight,” warns Nix as he cracks his knuckles.

  “Get the fuck out of my house.”

  “I only came for her.”

  “Is he your boyfriend?” asks Jake.

  “No, we don’t even like each other. I have no idea what’s going on,” says Cocoa as she struggles to release my hold on her wrist.

  “You’re just as crazy as your fucking mother. Why don’t you follow her lead and kill yourself?” asks Jake.

  I black the fuck out and start beating the shit out of him, causing fucking anarchy. All the males at the party converge on Dee, Nix, and me. There’s screaming, running, tables being knocked over, and Dee hitting motherfuckers with the bat.

  There’s a mad dash for the stairs, people are being knocked down.

  Oh, my fuck.

  It’s a damn mess. Someone grabs my arm. I yank away.

  “Come on, we have to get out of here!”

  It’s just Jamal. Kate and Lucy are standing beside him. When we finally make it up the stairs, we run to the car and get the hell out of there.

  “What the fuck?” yells Kate.

  “There has to be something going on between Maverick and you,” says Jamal.

  “There isn’t,” I reply.

  “Why the fuck would he come all the way to this party to get you?” asks Lucy.

  “I swear, I don’t know.”

  “Shit,” says Jamal from the passenger front seat as he looks at his phone.

  “What?” I can’t take any more damn surprises tonight.

  “The whole thing was recorded on Facebook Live, and already has a few hundred views.”

  Oh no.

  We left that fucker’s house with barely a scratch on us. I stop in the driveway where Dee and Nix’s cars are parked before driving to the garage. They don’t budge.

  “Don’t,” I say.

  “Mav,” says Nix.

  “I said, don’t.”

  “You like her,” says Dee.

  It’s not a question.

  “Your father’s going to kill you,” adds Dee.

  It’s the universal truth.

  “I’ll see you both at school on Monday.” This conversation is over.

  When they both hop out, I continue to the garage. I walk through the kitchen, preparing to head upstairs when John appears.

  “Maverick, please come to my study,” he says.

  What the fuck does he want? I have zero fucking patience right now.

  I follow behind him as he enters his study. While he sits in the chair behind his desk, I remain standing.

  “What?”

  “What the fuck is this?” he asks, sliding his cell phone across the desk.

  I pick it up. It’s a video of the fight at Jake’s. This will be all over school on Monday morning.

  “I told you to stay the fuck away from her.”

  “And I told you that I do whatever the fuck I want.”

  John opens a drawer to his right and pulls out a nine-millimeter, pointing it right at my chest.

  “Is that supposed to scare me?”

  “You will not make a mockery of this family.”

  “What family?”

  “I will not have little nigger grandchildren tainting this bloodline.”

  “The next time you point a gun at me, you better use it,” I say, leaving his study.

  The threat is left hanging between us.

  Montgomery Academy is abuzz with gossip about Saturday night when I arrive at school on Monday. The entire student body has seen the video by now. Students whisper as I walk past them in the halls. I hear a few students hurl the words ho, slut, whore, and other degrading words my way.

  Sticks and stones bitches, sticks and stones.

  I make it to physics class ahead of Maverick. Mr. Barnes has not arrived yet, either. Great, I get a few minutes reprieve before I have to face him. Something tells me there will definitely be a confrontation. Finally, a pissed off Maverick makes an appearance. He has bruises on his face, but something tells me they’re not from the fight on Saturday night, but from fighting at the warehouse. Maybe Maverick is the way he is because of his mother’s suicide
.

  He sits in his chair, turning his full attention on me. “Stay the fuck away from him.”

  “Do you honestly think I’d listen to you? You have no control over me.”

  He moves so close to my face our noses touch, his warm breath fans across my lips.

  “If I see or hear of you being near that asshole again, you won’t like what follows.”

  “And do you think I’ll just sit back and take it?”

  “Spread the word everyone,” Maverick shouts to the class. “Cocoa is a fucking attention-seeking whore who will open her legs for anyone. She’s been on my dick since we met in August.”

  With that announcement, he turns away from me to ignore me for the rest of the class.

  I’m not sociable at lunch today. I barely talk or acknowledge anyone. I know the students nearby notice my constant glances at the table where Cocoa is sitting. I don’t care what anyone thinks about my behavior. Not once has she broken down, cried, or gone to school officials about the things I’ve done to her. I’m curious to see how she’ll react to the battle I started with her in physics class today. She didn’t seem fazed by the announcement I made in class, or she has the best poker face I’ve ever seen. I know everyone is wondering why I went to Jake’s house on Saturday to get her.

  “Mav, are you okay?” asks Nix.

  Fuck no, I feel like I’m about to explode. It’s like my body and mind are at war.

  “I need to unwind. I need to go to the warehouse after practice tonight.”

  “You need time to relax your body, the game is on Friday,” says Dee.

  I feel like a live wire burning from the inside out, and I need a release.

  “I’m going.”

  Thursday is pep rally day. Students are gathered in the gym for the introduction of the football players. Excitement is in the air. The homecoming dance is tonight and will be held in this very gym. I have to admit that I’m excited, too—even though the week hasn’t been stellar for me, with the name-calling and me being branded a traitor for going to Jake’s party. I’m happy Jamal, Kate, or Lucy weren’t seen there. I don’t want to be the reason their peaceful existence is shattered even more.