Adventures of the Mad Monk Ji Gong

by Guo Xiaoting

  “If the monk does not feel hunger, do not we fear hunger?” Chai thought spitefully, but he said nothing.

  The monk said goodbye and Xiao Yuanwai followed them politely outside the door. The monk led the two headmen out of Xiao Yuanwai’s village, straight to Dianzhou prefecture and up to the restaurant door.

  “Let’s go in and have a drink,” said the monk.

  “Go in and have a drink!” exclaimed Chai. “Do we have money?”

  “You hung the parcel from the eaves,” said the monk, “and you still ask me that question.”

  “Didn’t you ask me to hang it there?” questioned Chai.

  “This is a wrong that the soul cannot shake off. I asked you to hang it there,” said the monk. “When the gods make a false step, the demons use it. I asked you to hang it there!”

  “What’s this business about gods and demons?” asked Chai.

  “Go on in!” said the monk. And so they went into the restaurant. They sat down and the monk called for food. After the monk had eaten all he could, he looked at the remaining food and said to the waiter, “Wrap it up and we’ll hang it from the eaves.”

  The more the magistrate heard, the more interested he became. Finally he went over to the table where the monk and the two detectives were sitting and asked, “Did you hang the package there from the eaves?”

  “It was I who hung it there,” replied Chai.

  “Good!” exclaimed the magistrate. “You are involved in the case.”

  Chai started to speak, but the monk interrupted him, saying, “Don’t say anything! If we are involved in a case, we don’t have the money to pay for the food.”

  One of the prefect’s headmen named Liu said, “I will pay the bill.”

  Chai said nothing, for he realized the monk was up to his old trick of eating and getting someone else to pay for the meal. When the bill came, it was three ounces and three pieces of silver. Headman Liu again said, “I will pay it. You three come with me.”

  “Good!” said the monk and followed the others out of the restaurant and on to the magistrate’s audience hall in the yamen.

  “Friend,” said Headman Liu, “tell us all now. You hung a man’s head from the eaves. Whom did you kill? Where is the body? Tell us everything.”

  “Whose head? It wasn’t a head!” said Chai. “I don’t understand.”

  “Just now in the restaurant, didn’t you say you hung a parcel from the eaves?” asked Liu.

  “That’s right,” answered Chai. “Let me tell you what happened. My name is Chai Yuanlo. He is She Jengying. We two are detectives from Linan. The monk is Ji Gong. The prime minister had the grand protector issue a warrant for the arrest of Cloud Dragon Hua, the River Rat. Yesterday, we were at the home of Xiao Yuanwai. This morning Ji Gong asked us what abilities we had to use in catching Cloud Dragon Hua. I told him that we could fly over a wall. In order to test my ability Ji Gong asked me to hang a package containing fifty ounces of silver from the eaves. If you don’t believe me, I have the warrant here.”

  When Headman Liu heard Chai’s account, he thought to himself, “I paid that restaurant bill for nothing,” and went to report what he had heard to the magistrate. The magistrate wanted to see Ji Gong at once, knowing that he was a famous monk. He sent word inviting the monk to the library. Ji Gong entered and greeted the magistrate.

  “Where does the holy monk come from?” asked the magistrate.

  “I come from Linan at the order of the prime minister,” responded Ji Gong. “I brought two headmen, that is, detectives, with me. We were ordered to arrest the River Rat, Cloud Dragon Hua. This outlaw stole a pearl coronet and a pair of jade pendants from Prime Minister Qin’s house. He killed a man in a restaurant and he also killed a nun while attempting to violate her. This robber is now in your honor’s jurisdiction.”

  “Where?” asked the magistrate.

  “In the home of Dian Guoben,” answered the monk.

  “Is that how it is?” said the magistrate. “My last superior, who told me that Dian Guoben was a relative of Prime Minister Qin, was removed from office. Dian Guoben came to visit me and I asked him who he was. He said he was one of the local people. I said that if he was one of the local people and not an official, he had no reason to visit me. I told him that he could, of course, bring a complaint or a petition to the audience hall and the court would hear him, but that he could not pay a social call on an official unless he were invited to do so. Later I heard that there would be an armed attack on the yamen during the night. I don’t know whether that’s true or false. Last night a human head was hung from eaves here in this yamen. I think there is some reason for this.”

  “Don’t worry,” said the monk. “If Your Honor wants to arrest Dian Guoben, we will arrest him. But there is one thing. If you send your officers and men to take him, you won’t be able to. Dian Guoben’s place is very large. As soon as word comes, the outlaws will be off like insects in the grass. Your Honor must go to visit him, and I, the monk, will go as part of your escort party. Then we will get him. I can get him myself.”

  “Can the holy monk do this?” the magistrate asked.

  “I can,” the monk stated. “Give me an official gown and I will put it on.”

  As soon as the monk’s face was washed, removing the dust of the road that had darkened his features, he was quite handsome and his face was not shadowed at all. He tucked his monk’s hat into the fold where his monk’s robe crossed over his chest and put on a long black official gown over his own clothes. His hair was gathered into a knot at the back of his head and a yamen runner’s black kerchief was tied over his topknot. He exchanged his sturdy monk’s sandals for a pair of thin black slippers. The magistrate also changed his own clothes, donning garments suitable for a social meeting. The other yamen people who were to accompany him made similar changes in their clothing.

  The magistrate then went outside and got into his sedan chair. When he and those accompanying him arrived at Dian Guoben’s home, a servant went in and announced that the magistrate had come to call. Dian Guoben was in the principal reception hall talking with Cloud Dragon Hua when the servant made his announcement.

  When Dian Guoben heard that the magistrate was at the gate, he said to Cloud Dragon, “My dear brother, recently I paid a visit to the magistrate, but he did not receive me. Now for no reason he appears. I fear there may be some troubling reason for this.”

  “Elder Brother need not be concerned,” said Chiu, the Crane’s Eye. “Probably the magistrate has heard that you are a relative of the prime minister. When he refused to see you recently, he evidently was not aware of that. Now he is, and has come to pay his respects.”

  Dian Guoben thought that Chiu’s statement was reasonable. “You two dear people,” he told the other two outlaws, “go into the west building and wait. If anything happens, if they make a move, you can come out and help. Brother Hua, you go into the flower garden and drink some wine while you wait until I have seen the visitors.”

  The three nodded in agreement and Dian Guoben prepared to meet the magistrate.

  CHAPTER 87

  The magistrate calls upon the outlaw; Ji Gong cleverly seizes Cloud Dragon Hua

  DIAN Guoben himself went forth to welcome the magistrate. When he reached the gate, the number of people in the magistrate’s escort party surprised him. “Welcome, Your Worship,” he greeted him. “This rustic person awaits your visit eagerly. You have come in your sedan chair!”

  “I have long wished to make the acquaintance of the famous yuanwai. This is a lucky meeting,” said the magistrate. “There was no need for you to meet us so ceremoniously.”

  “Please, Great One, enter,” Dian Guoben said as he ushered in the magistrate. Ji Gong and the rest of the escort party followed. When they entered the courtyard containing the great reception hall, only the magistrate and Ji Gong entered. “Will the Great One sit down?” invited Dian Guoben when they were indoors. The magistrate sat. Dian Guoben also sat and ordered that tea be s
erved. “Today the Great One has been so kind as to come here. Is there anything you desire?”

  “We have heard about the yuanwai’s fame and we came to visit,” replied the magistrate. Meanwhile, the monk who had been standing behind the magistrate began to nod his head and open and shut his eyes.

  “Perhaps it’s too late at night,” said Dian Guoben. “This great one is tired. Why not go and rest?”

  As soon as Ji Gong heard this, he went out of the reception room, making an apology.

  To the north of the building was the flower garden. Cloud Dragon was standing at the gate. He had been drinking at a table in the garden, but he had not enjoyed the wine. He kept wondering about the reason for the magistrate’s visit. “There must be another reason for his coming here besides a social visit,” he thought to himself. “Could he be coming to catch me?” As he stood uneasily in the garden looking around, he saw Ji Gong in his black gown. With the monk’s face washed clean, Cloud Dragon did not recognize him. He nodded his head toward him and called over. He was about to ask how many men the magistrate had brought with him and what they were doing.

  “Come here, uncle,” said Cloud Dragon.

  Ji Gong said nothing. Cloud Dragon thought to himself, “This fellow seems rather stupid. Perhaps he is a deaf mute.”

  Ji Gong stepped into the flower garden, pushing back the two doors of the gate as he exclaimed, “Cloud Dragon Hua, this time you cannot run away!”

  When Cloud Dragon Hua recognized Ji Gong’s voice, he was more frightened than he ever had been before. “Teacher, why do you want to take me?” he asked.

  “I do not actually want to take you. I could have taken you at Ma Jing’s home when you were in the little cellar hiding behind the scroll, and I could have taken you a number of other times, but I didn’t.”

  “That’s right,” thought Cloud Dragon, “but why does he want to take me now?”

  “Dian Guoben sent a letter to the magistrate and asked us to come and take you,” said the monk.

  When Cloud Dragon heard this, he shouted, “That beast with a man’s face, brought up by a dog!”

  “You must just recognize your fate,” said the monk as he pointed, and with his hypnotic power left Cloud Dragon paralyzed.

  The monk turned about and left the flower garden. He passed the reception hall and went through a gate into the other courtyard, where the escort group was waiting. There he called to Chai Yuanlo and She Jingying to come to the flower garden. When they got there, he said, “I have just caught Cloud Dragon Hua. Take him and lock him in irons.”

  Chai and She were overjoyed. All their doubts vanished. This man really was Cloud Dragon Hua. They took their chains and locked them securely around the criminal.

  Then Ji Gong went into the building where Cloud Dragon Hua had been staying and came out with the stolen pearl coronet and the jade pendants, which he gave to Headman Chai, saying, “Take these with you. Let us now go to Dian Guoben.”

  Dian Guoben had once been the leader of a gang in Four Rivers. After many of his men had proved to be involved in crimes, he escaped and fled to Chuzhou prefecture. He had brought a great deal of silver and with it he was able to purchase a large estate. With his two friends, Yang and Chiu, he had committed many crimes.

  Prime Minister Qin’s father had been named Wang, but when a eunuch who was the prime minister at the time adopted him, he naturally took the name of the eunuch and therefore was known as Qin Kui. Prime Minister Qin Kui had a brother named Wang Xien. When Wang Xien came to Chuzhou to collect taxes, Dian Guoben learned that Wang Xien had no interest in antiques or picture scrolls. He cared only for beautiful women.

  Dian Guoben purchased an exquisitely beautiful young virgin named Jade Orchid for three thousand silver pieces. He had the girl brought before him and told her, “Jade Orchid, I am thinking of using you to make contact with powerful people. I would like to give you in marriage to the brother of Prime Minister Qin, but I don’t know how you would feel about this.”

  Jade Orchid answered, “I will do whatever the yuanwai wishes.”

  “Tomorrow I shall invite Wang Xien to dinner. Put on a simple gown and come into the reception hall, pretending that you need to speak to me. Make sure that he sees you. If he asks about you afterward, I will say that you are my younger sister living here under my protection. Then, if he wishes, I will give you to him in marriage. You will be a rich woman. And I will become a powerful person with connections to the prime minister.”

  Jade Orchid agreed to this plan.

  The next day Dian Guoben invited Wang Xien to dinner. He accepted the invitation. While they were drinking and talking together, Jade Orchid, very nicely dressed in a simple gown, came to the doorway of the room and asked, “Is the yuanwai here?” Just as she raised the bamboo curtain and looked into the room, she exclaimed, “Oh! There is a guest in this room! Those maids never told me!” She looked at Wang Xien and then quickly looked away and left.

  “Who is that person, Dian Yuanwai?” asked Wang Xien.

  “That is my younger sister,” replied Dian Guoben. “Her husband died less than a month ago. Now she is staying here with me.”

  “Why doesn’t the yuanwai give her to me?” asked Wang Xien. “She could be my concubine.”

  “It would not be proper for me. I can hardly give her to you,” replied Dian Guoben.

  Wang Xien said nothing more about the matter. He finished eating, said goodbye, left, and went back to the house where he was staying. There he said to one of his people. “I have never seen such a beautiful woman as that sister of Dian Guoben! I would like to have her!”

  “Let me go and talk with him,” said the man. “I will tell him of your wishes and no doubt he will be willing.”

  “Good!” exclaimed Wang Xien. “If you succeed, I will give you two hundred pieces of silver.”

  “I will go, then,” said the man. As soon as he arrived at Dian Guoben’s house and said that Wang Xien begged for his sister, Dian Guoben agreed to the arrangement.

  After Wang Xien and Jade Orchid were married, Dian gave Wang Xien a letter saying that the prefect was unsuitable for his office. Wang Xien gave it to the prime minister when he next saw him. The prime minister promptly recalled the prefect and sent a new man in his place.

  The new prefect did not suit Dian Guoben either, and he sent off a second letter to the prime minister. When Prime Minister Qin read it, he said to his brother, “What about this relative of yours? I changed the prefect once! Doesn’t any prefect satisfy him?”

  Wang Xien wrote to Dian Guoben telling of his disappointment and advising him to watch and report any improper acts of the prefect. At this point, Dien Guoben decided to send the Crane’s Eye to hang the man’s head in the prefect’s courtyard, thinking that the prefect would be frightened.

  While Dian Guoben was talking with the magistrate, he suddenly realized that something was going on in the courtyard outside. When he looked out and saw the two headmen with Cloud Dragon Hua in chains, he was enraged! “How do you dare to pretend you are making a social call while you are really pursuing a case?” he demanded springing to his feet.

  He was about to attack the magistrate when Ji Gong stunned him and had him put in chains as well. When the other two outlaws heard the noise, they came rushing in with swords drawn, only to receive the same treatment as Dian Guoben.

  At the magistrate’s order, the party quickly returned to the yamen, where His Honor had a notice posted that court would be in session. In a short time at least twenty people came in with complaints against Dian Guoben, accusing him of theft, abduction of women, and other crimes, all of which were very serious.

  Then the magistrate sent someone to call Ji Gong to the yamen to join him for a drink of wine. Afterward, the prisoners were interrogated and their confessions were written down, which the magistrate had wanted Ji Gong to hear. The prisoners were on view for all to see while the court waited for Ji Gong to appear before proceeding. Everyone knew that Ji Gong from
the Monastery of the Soul’s Retreat had taken Cloud Dragon, Dian Guoben, and the three so-called Honorable Men—the first, the second, and the third.

  The clamor aroused two river pirates. Who would have thought that two river pirates would hear about Cloud Dragon Hua’s capture? These two were also among the men of the Greenwood. One was named Jiao Liang, the Golden-Faced Ghost. The other was Ho Jing, the Death-Decree Ghost. These two had just returned from the north and were passing through Linan when they heard the news. The two did not even know what crimes he had committed. “Since we know of this,” said Jiao, “we must do something about it.”

  CHAPTER 88

  Cloud Dragon Hua joins his five comrades; two friends come to a party bringing a head

  AS the two outlaws went on walking and talking, they came to the place of execution and looked around. It was growing late in the day, but the official event had not yet occurred. Across the way was a wine shop, and the two walked in. The place was crowded. As the waiter looked at them, he saw that they were more richly dressed than most other customers. He quickly took them to a table. They sat down and ordered food and wine.

  They could hear the people around them saying, “This Cloud Dragon Hua committed some terrible crimes. He killed a woman in the nunnery and also killed a man in the Tai Shan Tower restaurant. Then he stole the phoenix coronet and the jade pendants from the prime minister’s bedroom. If the monk Ji Gong had not taken people with him and captured him, no one could have done anything about it.”

  The two outlaws were whispering one to the other, “First, we will go to the execution ground and rescue Cloud Dragon Hua. Then we will take revenge on this monk!”

  Just as they were talking, in walked a poor, ragged monk. A great number of those in the restaurant knew him. One called out, “Teacher Ji has come!” Another exclaimed, “The holy monk has arrived!”

  “Please, everyone, do not shout,” said the monk. “I am simply the one who caught Cloud Dragon Hua—and the one who caught Cloud Dragon Hua is I. If anyone is dissatisfied with that, he can come to me.”