Stolen Dreams

by Christine Amsden

  Everyone would be there, of course. That was the most important part. I wanted to share the day with the world, and let them feel my happiness.

  And of course, my father would give me away.

  It wasn’t to be, though. Not anymore. The only thing my real wedding would have in common with that fantasy was the groom, who I had always pictured as Evan. No one else had ever stood in that spot, not even during the years I spent with Braden, or the months I spent hating Evan. Not that I thought about my perfect wedding during any of those times, it was more the exercise of a little girl and then a teenager growing into womanhood.

  “I’m sorry,” Evan said. “I know this won’t be your dream wedding.”

  “That’s an understatement. This doesn’t feel right.”

  “It’s too late for second thoughts.”

  “I know that!” I wasn’t having second thoughts about marrying him, only about the wedding itself, and the secrecy. I wanted to tell my family. I wanted them to be there for me, and feel happy for me.

  “Cassie, what do you think your family will do if you tell them first?” Evan asked.

  “Kidnap me and hold me until I come to my senses,” I said without hesitation. Unfortunately, they might do that afterward too. I just didn’t know.

  “The day will be special for me as long as you’re there,” Evan said.

  My heart gave a little squeeze, but I couldn’t honestly return the sentiment. I needed more.

  “Is there anything I can do?” Evan asked.

  I sighed. Time to let go of another dream. “I want Kaitlin and Madison there.”

  “Done.” He pulled a ring out of his pocket, a beautiful sapphire surrounded by diamonds. “This was my grandmother’s.”

  “Abigail’s?” I asked.

  He nodded. “I know she wanted you to wear it.”

  I gave him my hand, allowing him to slide the band onto my finger.

  * * *

  Evan didn’t want my help in looking for Tyler, but before I had a chance to argue with him, he pointed out that he would be working with his family. That shut me up pretty quickly.

  While he was busy with his war council, I spent the day with Kaitlin and her new baby. I hadn’t seen her since Friday night, shortly after Jason had performed his binding and left without saying good-bye. I felt bad about that, since I had promised to be there, but as I explained to her, I had nearly been burned to death.

  “It’s okay,” Kaitlin said. “Madison was there, and so was my mom.”

  “Are you and your mom all right?” I asked, remembering their disagreements over practically every aspect of giving birth.

  “Sort of. Now she’s trying to convince me to stop breastfeeding.”

  I groaned.

  “Last night was awful, too,” Kaitlin said. “The baby wanted to nurse every thirty minutes, and she was sure he’s starving.”

  “That’s normal. It’s called a cluster feed.”

  “I know. I was a bit annoyed at your mom for making me read all those books at first, but now I’m glad I did. Even knowing, it’s hard when you’ve got someone in your face swearing your baby’s starving.”

  I could only imagine. I came from a long line of naturalists, so it was something I knew I would never have to deal with.

  “He’s not starving, is he?” Kaitlin asked, sounding suddenly worried. “My milk hasn’t come in yet.”

  “You’re counting diapers, right?”

  She nodded.

  “Then he’s fine. It hasn’t even been two days.”

  “Okay.”

  She didn’t look okay. She sat on the leather sofa, leaning heavily against one arm with the baby asleep against her chest. She looked ready to join him.

  “Do you want me to take him while you sleep?” I asked.

  “I’m fine.” She slurred her words slightly, though. “Tried to sleep last night. Couldn’t. Was all alone.”

  I winced. “Madison will be moving back in soon. Evan is being a bit overprotective with her.”

  “Wish someone’d be overprotective with me.”

  I wasn’t going to touch that one, but I did broach another subject. “How did you feel about Jason showing up Friday?”

  “Confused.” She looked like she might say more, then decided against it. “Will he be back, do you think?”

  “I think if he does come back, you’d be better off staying away from him. He’s mixed up with some dangerous people, even if he’s not a vampire.” Yet, I added mentally. That’s what Xavier had declared, at any rate.

  “He was here last night,” Kaitlin said so softly I wasn’t sure I heard her at first.

  “Jason? In this house?”

  “No. Looking in through the window. When I saw him, he ran off.” She sighed. “I don’t understand him.”

  I didn’t either, but despite Xavier’s warning, I intended to find out. This all had something to do with Jason’s father, and since my mother was still barely functioning, that left one other person who might know something about the man. I only hoped that afterward, Aunt Sherry would forgive me for asking.

  * * *

  Aunt Sherry was saying good-bye to one last customer and just about to close her shop when I intercepted her. From the wary look she shot my way, I wonder if she had some inkling of why I had come, but she didn’t try to put me off. She stepped aside, allowing me to enter, then locked the door behind me, switching her sign to CLOSED.

  Aunt Sherry and my mom had been identical in their youth, but thanks to years of taking rejuvenation potions, my mom only looked a few years older than me, while Aunt Sherry appeared more like a mom was supposed to look–still attractive, but clearly forty-two. Her hair wasn’t quite as lustrous as it had once been, but it hadn’t gone to gray. She was a little on the plump side, but well proportioned. She was a look into my future, unless I decided to rejuvenate myself the way my parents had done. I briefly wondered whether or not Evan would want me to do that, but dismissed it as something we had many years to discuss.

  “I heard about Jason visiting the hospital on Friday,” Aunt Sherry said. “I guess that’s why you’re here.”

  “Have you seen him since?”

  She shook her head. “I wish he’d talk to me, but I sometimes feel like I lost him years ago. He wanted to know about his father, and I… couldn’t tell him.”

  “Can you tell me?” I asked.

  Her face paled. “Why?”

  “Because Jason thinks he’s in danger from his father.”

  “Really?” Aunt Sherry’s eyes unfocused, looking into the past. “I wonder why.”

  There was a dead end. “When was the last time you saw Jason’s father?”

  “Right before Jason was born.” She shuddered. “He came here, to Eagle Rock, but he couldn’t get to me.”

  “My father?”

  She nodded. “He tried to get to Sheila, too, hoping to use her to get to me, but that didn’t work either.”

  I refused to think kindly of Victor for providing that protection.

  “I told Jason his father was dead until he was eighteen. He wasn’t happy when he found out. Went off searching for the man. I guess he found him, but he never told me much about what happened. Jason and I haven’t really been close since then.”

  I felt a moment of sympathy for my aunt, alone in the world save for a son who might go vampire, if I couldn’t figure out a way to help him.

  “Kaitlin won’t let me see Jay,” Aunt Sherry said out of the blue. “I tried to visit in the hospital, but she sent me away. I called to ask if I could come by tonight, but she said no.”

  “I’ll talk to her.”

  “Thanks. I wish I could help more. I’m afraid for Jason.”

  “Me too.” I knew she wanted me to tell her more, but remembering Xavier’s warning, I decided against it. I hoped I could learn a few things without calling attention to myself, but in case I failed, I didn’t want to endanger anyone else.

  27

  WINTER DECI
DED TO SNAP AT OUR heels one last time on its way out, leaving a chill in the air the day of my wedding that I felt to my bones. I had spent three days preparing myself for a small, impersonal weeding before a judge, but it turned out I wasn’t ready at all.

  No wonder I hadn’t dreamed of my wedding. With the dream catcher installed, I thought that I might be able to dredge up some happy thoughts about the impending nuptials. The night before my wedding I took it down, but nothing had changed. I still remembered nothing at all when the dream catcher didn’t hold the nightmares at bay.

  Evan tried. I never blamed him for the way I felt on what should have been the most special day of my life. I blamed his father. I blamed mine. I even blamed Nicolas, who I continued to probe for soft points where Evan was concerned. He didn’t have any, so not only was he absent on my wedding day, he didn’t know he missed it.

  At least Madison and Kaitlin were there, the latter wearing a loose-fitting maternity dress and a baby, secured in a wrap. She looked exhausted, but she had come. She had even said she wouldn’t miss it for the world. I appreciated that more than I could say.

  “I saw Jason again last night,” Kaitlin said in passing after the ceremony.

  “Was he outside the window again?” I asked.

  She nodded.

  I frowned thoughtfully. I still wanted to talk to Jason, but he wasn’t returning phone calls or e-mails. If he kept going back to the same place though, I might be able to rig up some kind of trap.

  “Whatever you’re thinking,” Evan said, “don’t.”

  “I have to help him. You said you wanted to help, too.”

  “I do want to help, but I don’t want to put you in danger. Xavier meant business, and I’m not sure I can protect you from him.”

  Kaitlin’s eyes widened at the overheard admission. I caught her gaze and nodded once to let her know how serious the situation was. She returned the nod, a little shakily, to show her understanding.

  “Can we talk about this later?” I asked. The day was already cold enough without us getting into what I already knew would be an argument. I had no intention of stopping my investigation, which was primarily why I hadn’t told Evan much about it.

  “Yes.” He took my hand in his, squeezing in gently before bringing it to his lips. His eyes held a promise of what would come.

  The one advantage to our small wedding was that in skipping the festivities, we quickly got to the wedding “night,” which started after lunch. We didn’t talk much, or dwell on problems. For one glorious day we created a bubble around ourselves to hold the rest of the world at bay.

  * * *

  I dreamed of my daughter that night. In the dream she was five or six years old, her eyes full of laughter. She had dark brown hair without my auburn cast, and a face that reminded me a bit of Juliana. I called her Anastasia, a name I hoped she would not find too difficult to grow into.

  As I dutifully recorded the details of the dream in my journal, I wondered again if I should tell Evan about them. He hadn’t asked about my dreams, nor did he bother me when, first thing in the morning, I scribbled everything I could remember into a nearby notebook. He would either feign sleep, or else attend to his personal needs so that as soon as I finished, he could reclaim my attention.

  Each morning I considered telling him some of my hopes and fears, but each morning I let him distract me. Afterward, I would talk myself out of sharing with him. It wasn’t as if one had come true since we’d first made love.

  The morning after our wedding, however; I really planned to tell him. I finished my description of Anastasia’s smile, which was a little lopsided, made a show of setting down journal and pen, then turned to Evan with one finger up to forestall what I am sure would have been a highly enjoyable encounter.

  “What is it?” Evan asked, the passion in his eyes dimming somewhat. I hated to see that, especially the morning after our wedding.

  “There’s something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about. It’s nothing, really, probably just me being silly, but–”

  My cell phone rang. I groaned.

  “Ignore it,” Evan said. “What did you need to say?”

  But the interruption had destroyed my resolve, and I reached for the phone lying on my nightstand. “Hello?”

  “Hi Cassie. This is Samantha from Alex’s office.”

  I sat up straight, my eyes wide. Evan gave me a “Who is it?” look, but I shook my head at him. I knew Samantha fairly well, at least as well as I knew anyone in Alexander’s organization. Alexander’s secretary, a woman nearly old enough to be his mother, was the only person I knew who called him Alex, and even she only used the name in front of a few select people. I don’t know when I became a part of that inner circle, though I suspect Alexander told his secretary about his plans to court me before he clued me in.

  “Um, why are you calling?” Surely by now, Alexander knew that he and I were done. He may or may not have tried to kill me through Tyler–I would reserve judgment even if Evan had not–but he knew how Evan felt about him, and he knew we were together.

  If she was taken aback by my tone, she didn’t show it. “I’m starting to get worried. Tyler Lake hasn’t checked in with me all week, and he’s usually so good about that kind of thing. I’ve tried his e-mail and his cell. I called the hotel, but they said he checked out.”

  “Are you serious?” On the surface, the very fact that she asked the question suggested she–and by extension Alexander–weren’t in league with Tyler. Then again, it could be a trick.

  “Why wouldn’t I be? Do you know something?”

  “I, um, you know he tried to kill me, right?”

  “What?” She was either a good actress, or legitimately surprised. In no state of mind to determine which at the moment, I hung up.

  “Who was it?” Evan asked.

  “That was Alexander’s secretary asking if I’ve seen Tyler lately.”

  My cell phone rang again; it was the same number.

  “Is that her?” he asked.

  I nodded.

  “Don’t answer,” he said. “If they don’t know we’re onto them, I don’t want to clue them in.”

  “I’m not sure we’re onto anything, and we won’t know until we find Tyler and somehow force the truth out of him.” I paused, expectantly. “How’s that going, by the way, since you haven’t really been letting me get involved?”

  “It’s not going well, obviously. I’d tell you if I found anything. You know that.”

  Maybe. Probably. “Where are you going today?” I asked him. “Can I come with you?’

  He hesitated. “I’ve been spending a lot of time with the Blairs, especially Matthew. I don’t know if you should get involved.”

  I studied him for a moment, frowning. “Why shouldn’t I? I’d actually be interested in hearing what he has to say, especially now that I’m well out of Alexander’s movement.”

  Evan continued to hesitate.

  “I mean, I still want to be a part of helping people,” I said. “You do know that.”

  “Yes, of course I know that.”

  “You’ve always said I had valuable things to contribute, even without magic.”

  “You do, but….” He trailed off, apparently unsure how to finish.

  “You don’t want me around him,” I said as understanding dawned. Not that I could entirely blame him, after Matthew had tried to manipulate me with mind magic.

  “I trust you; it’s him I don’t trust. I sometimes think he can read minds.”

  “He can.” I wouldn’t normally blurt out a secret like that but, it occurred to me, Evan was my husband now. He was family.

  “How do you know?”

  “He told me. It was part of his seduction routine. I think it might have been the reason it almost worked so well. The man knows what he’s doing.”

  Evan scowled.

  “There’s nothing he can do to me now.” I ran my hand up his arm. “You trusted him the other day, when you were trying to co
nvince me to look deeper into my father’s murder.”

  “I needed backup that night. You wouldn’t have accepted it from me.”

  “You obviously trust him a little bit, if you’re working with him.”

  “I don’t trust him at all, but he’s an alternative to Alexander, and I think he has some good intentions.”

  “Then let me come with you. I have good instincts about these things.”

  My phone rang again, but this time when I looked at the caller ID, I saw Alexander’s direct line. I frowned. “It’s Alexander himself this time.”

  That apparently decided the matter for Evan. “Fine, come with me.”

  * * *

  I had visited Matthew’s house before, the night I had learned the truth about where my magic had gone. If Evan hadn’t put a chastity spell on me, Matthew would have become my first lover, and things might be very different now. I tried not to think about that night when we rang the doorbell, especially because Matthew could read my mind, but the tension in Evan’s posture told me he was thinking about it.

  “It’s okay,” I whispered into his ear. “Everything worked out in the end.”

  The door opened and Matthew welcomed us inside. If my presence surprised him, he didn’t show it.

  “Welcome to the headquarters of the White Guard,” Matthew said to me, ushering me into the living room where his father, James, and his brother, Robert, also sat.

  Evan wound his arm around my waist and kept it there as he led me to a love seat. It was an awkward position, especially since my potion belt kept knocking him in the thigh, but he pretended not to notice. He kept his arm around me when we sat too, even though I shot him a dirty look.

  James grinned at us. “I was actually disappointed not to have the chance to help you settle your wager.”

  “I just bet you were,” I said.