by Misa Rush
“I’d do him,” Brad said. They all looked at him simultaneously. “Just joking of course.” He grinned.
“Sorry, Brad, but I think he’s already spoken for.” Karsen winked at Addison.
Addison’s cheeks turned a cherry red.
“I’m not so sure about that,” Addison said, trailing off under her breath. “…and I can only blame myself.”
Karsen responded at an equally quiet decibel. “Then only you can fix it.”
She peered at Karsen.
“He could have any woman he wants. At any rate, he’s probably already moved on.”
“I think you’re wrong,” Karsen said.
“Me, too,” Hanna declared.
“Really.” Addison paused, intrigued at their confidence. “What makes you think that?” For a moment, she couldn’t believe she was asking advice from two women almost half her age.
“First of all, he’s here alone,” Hanna said assuredly. “Second, he bee-lined his way directly to you and didn’t hesitate when you suggested you two talk.”
“And lastly,” Karsen added, taking the words straight out of Hanna’s mouth, “you can see it in his eyes. He’s in love with you, Addison.”
“Honestly, you really think he’s still interested?” Addison asked, genuinely thrown. She couldn’t believe she might get a second chance. Not after how she’d behaved.
“Yes!” They retorted in unison. “Now go!”
“I heard about Urbane. I’m sorry,” Russell said meeting her outside and handing her a large round glass filled with wine. He watched as she swirled the wine like a professional sommelier. She raised it to her lips. The nose of the wine smelled of a sweet harmonious fusion of black cherry and plums. She pursed her lips against the brim and allowed the burgundy liquid to saturate her palate.
“The important thing is that no one was hurt. It could have been a tragedy.”
“I’m glad to hear you’re keeping it in perspective. I know how much Urbane means to you.” He sipped his drink, a smooth shot of scotch. He held back telling her how he had come to Urbane the day of the fire. How he had wanted to sweep her up into his arms. How he watched from the side lines, not letting her see him.
“I don’t know how you drink that straight.” She shuddered at the thought of the potent liquid burning her throat.
“Drinking it any other way would ruin it.”
They stood beside each other, an awkward silence hanging overhead like a thick storm cloud. Addison watched several couples interspersed across the balcony. She admitted to herself the atmosphere was quite romantic. The sky was striated with wispy clouds. Underneath the muffled voices, the gentle trickle of the waterfall provided a calming hum.
“Addison.” He placed his drink on the railing then slid hers from her hand and set it beside his. He took her hand and lifted it slightly more out of an act of compassion than of romance. He met her eyes with his. “Is this what Emily was referring to? I mean, your past…I thought you were an only child.” His voice strained as he searched for clarity.
She stood motionless, holding his hand. A sudden familiar urge to conceal the truth, to walk away, swept over her, but she knew running away now would defeat the purpose of initiating this interaction. If there was a chance to rectify their relationship, no matter how small, she had to divulge the truth. She’d been hiding for far too long. Without turning to face him, she nodded. He patiently awaited her explanation.
Addison recounted every detail from the moment she found out she was adopted to the present. He listened intently, allowing her to speak without interruption.
“I’m sorry, Russell, very truly sorry. I know my actions for all these years may have been based on an immature false reality, but to me my feelings were real.”
“I had no idea, Addy. I wish you could have trusted me with this.”
“I’m sorry,” she repeated.
He paused. “Me, too.” He squeezed her hand before letting go. “Should we go back inside? They’re probably about to serve dinner.”
She wanted him to take her into his arms. She wanted him to tell her everything was okay, but her courage failed her. Instead of asking him if there was still a chance, she simply nodded in agreement. Russell turned to leave.
“Russell?” She stopped him. “Before we go in, can I ask you a favor? If it’s not possible, I’ll understand. But, there is something I thought you might be able to help me with.” She explained her proposal.
“Absolutely,” he said, managing a cordial smile. “I’ll see what I can do.”
“Soooo?” Karsen asked as Addison took the seat next to her at the table. Addison forced the corners of her mouth into a slight grin and shook her head, not wanting to cry in front of everyone. Both surprised and disappointed, Karsen scanned the room for Russell. He had taken his seat and she could see that he’d entered into a conversation with the elderly couple sitting at his table. She couldn’t help but continue to watch him. Give me a sign. Any sign. Just then he looked their way and, noticing her attention, tipped his glass toward Karsen. He is still interested! she thought with a satisfied smile.
After dinner, Karsen fashioned her own agenda. Excusing herself from the table, she walked across the room.
“Would you like to dance?” Karsen placed her hand on Russell’s shoulder. Her boldness surprised even her.
“Certainly.” He placed the napkin from his lap onto his plate and walked beside her to the dance floor. “It’s Karsen, right?” He remembered from their brief introduction.
“Yes.”
“Karsen is a unique name. Very pretty, I like it.”
“Thank you.” She faced him, suddenly struck with the thought that her dancing skills consisted of holding her boyfriend’s neck while swaying back and forth, hardly the waltz. He grasped her hand lightly keeping a comfortably platonic distance as if she were his daughter. She placed the opposite hand upon his shoulder and felt a trace of relief as he began to lead.
“So, I’m guessing there is something on your mind other than dancing,” he said as he slowly whirled her around the floor.
“That obvious, huh?”
“Well, you’re half my age and from what I’ve been told, you’re expecting, so I’m guessing you’re not after a one night stand.”
She smiled. “No. I’ve had enough of men for awhile.”
“I see.”
“Addison, on the other hand…”
“Ah ha. That’s what this is about. I figured as much. Are we in fifth grade again?”
Karsen looked at him intently. “She didn’t send me. Just to be clear.”
“I know. She never would. Too stubborn.”
The fine lines around his eyes wrinkled as he smiled. His look was rugged but distinguished, like a model in an outdoor clothing catalogue. Karsen could see why Addison was attracted to him.
“She’s in love with you.”
“Did she tell you that?”
“Well, not exactly. But she is.” Karsen contemplated what to say next. “You’re in love with her, too.”
A faint smile crossed his lips and Karsen noticed how it appeared slightly crooked, a slight imperfection which oddly made him more attractive. The same trait Addison loved. “And what makes you think that? You’ve known me for all of an hour.”
“You’ve made one hell of an impression.” She giggled. “But seriously. I just want her to be happy.”
“As do I. And for the record, she pushed me away.”
The song drew to an end. The beginning of “Let’s Twist Again” transitioned the dance floor to a faster tempo. They stopped dancing and stood for an awkward moment staring at each other.
“She only pushed you away because she was afraid. Russell, you can’t let her go. Please, you have to talk to her.”
“Thank you for the dance, Karsen.”
His voice when he spoke had a hard edge. Karsen cringed as she felt an unyielding stab of defeat. She scrutinized his face one last time. The smile he forced was u
nconvincing and his weathered skin tightened around his brow. The spark in his eyes contradicted his voice. Instead, he seemed sad. He kissed her hand without another word and walked off the floor.
Across the room, Addison turned and caught a glimpse of Russell just as he exited. She wanted to run after him, but her feet wouldn’t move. She couldn’t find the courage. Her heart ached as she let her second chance walk away.
Karsen left the ballroom in search of Addison. She found her secluded, nestled in the furthest corner of the patio by the fire pit. The structure was impressive, surrounded by hand stacked stone. Two oversized wrought iron patio chairs and one loveseat faced the fire. Addison sipped her wine and allowed the soft crackles of the fire soothe her.
“Care for company?” Karsen interrupted the silence.
Addison glanced over her shoulder and shrugged. “Sure.”
Karsen squeezed in next to her on the small couch. “I talked to Russell. I don’t know if he’s going to come around.”
“You shouldn’t have done that.”
“I know, but that’s what sisters do, right?” Karsen paused. “I’m sorry if it seems childish. I just wanted to help.”
Addison laid her head on Karsen’s shoulder. They sat together quietly, soaking in the fire’s warmth.
“Thank you for tonight, Addison.” Karsen said. “I feel like Cinderella at the ball. Although, I hope I don’t lose one of my new Prada shoes.” She giggled. “Think I’ll still be able to wear them when I’m fat and swollen being prego in a hundred and ten degree heat?”
Addison finally smiled. “You might want to put them away until after the baby arrives.”
“Will you come visit? I mean, when the baby comes?”
“I’d love to. I love Arizona. The Aji spa is my absolute favorite. Maybe I can treat you to a postpartum retreat.”
“Sounds wonderful, but I’m not sure I’ll be living in Arizona once the baby arrives. I’ll probably have to move back in with my dad and I don’t know what spas are like in Middlebury, Indiana. There’s a great Amish restaurant that has pies that are to die for, though.”
“Mmmm. I love pie. Do I get the whole pie or just a piece?”
“I’ll take one piece, you can have the rest. How’s that for sharing?”
Addison straightened up. She pulled the clip securing her hair and allowed it to flow down gracefully over her shoulders. The night was ending. Russell had departed without saying goodbye. There was little reason to remain all gussied up.
“Karsen?”
“Yeah?”
Addison’s face lit up. “Why not come to New York?”
“New York?” Karsen repeated, a bit surprised. “I couldn’t afford to live here. I figure I can live with Dad and get a job locally. Maybe take some classes if I can fit them in. I want to finish school, someday at least.”
“Taking money out of the equation, what would you do?” Addison asked.
“I don’t know. Finish school for sure. Then find a job that would support the baby and me.”
“You’re degree is in communications, right?”
“It will be.”
Addison paused. Karsen had answered her questions unaware of where precisely she was going.
“What if you came and lived with me?”
“What?”
“You can finish school at NYU, or Berkeley for that matter, and work for Urbane. I have more than enough room for you and the baby, and with my help you’ll be more flexible with time, or I can pay for a nanny if needed.”
Karsen stared in disbelief at Addison. Had she heard right?
“Addison, I appreciate the gesture…you don’t know how much I do, but I could never impose on you like that.”
“Nonsense. You wouldn’t be. I’m going to need all the help I can find to get Urbane back up and running. And, I want to be a part of my niece or nephew’s life. It’s win-win.”
“Really?”
“Really, Karsen, I know rationally moving across the country to live with someone you’ve just met may seem foolish, and me, of all people. Typically I never act in such an illogical manner. If anyone asked me last week if I’d be considering this, I would tell them that they were insane. But, it feels right. Let me help you. What do you say?”
Karsen sat contemplating, her face momentarily void of emotion. She looked steadily at Addison, waiting for her to waiver, to change her mind. She released a breath, half sigh, half laugh as a smile perked across her lips.
“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but let’s do it. I’m going to move to New York!”
30
The next morning Karsen bounded out of bed. The dark cloud she’d had hovering above her the last few months had lifted. Within her brewed a sensation that she hadn’t felt for a long time. Hope. She looked in the mirror and smiled. Thank you, Mom. I know you’d be here if you could. Maybe there is a reason for all of this after all.
“Hey, sunshine,” Brad called from the porch.
“Good morning!” Karsen grabbed a glass from the cupboard and poured herself some orange juice before joining him. “Coffee smells wonderful. Drink some for me, would ya?”
“I’ll buy you a stash of decaf when we get back to Arizona.”
“Can you make it a small stash?”
“Why’s that?”
“Don’t freak out, okay?”
“Uh-oh. Here we go again. What’s up now, Karsen?” What could she possibly be thinking? He thought, though he noted a happy note to her voice that had been absent for far too long.
“Addison asked me to move to New York.”
“What?”
“Before you get your feathers all ruffled, hear me out. The semester is over in four weeks. I can finish my classes then transfer here for the fall. Addison offered me a position at Urbane. That would have been a dream job for me before. Do you know how hard it is to get hired by a major publication? The experience alone is priceless.”
Brad understood the appeal. “But what about the baby? I’m not going to be close enough to help if you need it.”
“Brad. I love you and I appreciate everything you do for me. I do. But I need to stand on my own two feet. I can do this. I can help Addison rebuild Urbane. I can finish my degree and raise this child. I’m not expecting it to be an easy road. But sometimes you have to choose the path less taken, right?”
He set his coffee down on the table. His fingers intertwined and he lifted his hands in thought to his lips. He struggled to find the right words to say. He knew she was strong enough to succeed. Protecting her had become part of his own identity, but deep down he knew she was right. He needed to let it go.
“Karsen?”
“Yes?” she said tentatively, awaiting his response. Her mind was made up no matter what he thought, still she longed for his approval.
“I’m proud of you.”
The late risers eventually staggered down one after another, muttering groggy but cordial greetings until their first cup of coffee kicked in. Addison’s parents arranged an elaborate spread of food, putting the buffets at most five-star resorts to shame. Everyone gathered around the kitchen table.
“Thank you so much for having us,” Karsen said to Mrs. Reynolds.
“I hear you’ll be returning,” she said smiling.
Karsen couldn’t help the grin that stretched across her face. “Yes. In a month.”
“I’m glad. Come by anytime.”
Addison finished a bite of eggs benedict and reminded the group that they needed to be packed and ready to go in one hour. She’d arranged for her corporate jet to fly them back to Arizona. They joked about how it wouldn’t take long to get ready since all of them had traveled so light. Through the chatter, they heard the doorbell ring.
“I’ll get it,” Addison’s mother said, rising from her seat. She entered the foyer and opened the front door.
“Is Addison available?” a male voice asked. The voice sounded oddly familiar to Karsen.
“Certainly. Pleas
e come in.”
He wiped his feet on the doormat before he entered then followed Mrs. Reynolds down the hall into the kitchen.
“Hello, Jacob. What are you doing here?” Addison asked with a bewildered expression.
Jacob lifted his laptop bag off of his shoulder and placed it on the table, all eyes following his movements in amused anticipation.
“Work, what else?” He grinned with pride. “I’ve got this month’s issue of Urbane proofed, formatted and ready to go. Luckily, I had saved a copy on my laptop and grabbed it before I left. At any rate, Brand-son Publishing has offered to lend their services. We can have the issue printed and on shelves in only a week past its usual publication date.”
“Are you serious?” Addison asked in amazement.
“Absolutely. I just need your approval.”
“Wow!” she screamed. “You are unbelievable! I can’t thank you enough!” She scrambled to her feet and threw her arms around Jacob, knocking him off balance.
“He probably deserves a raise,” Brad chimed in.
“I’ll see what I can do about that.” Addison bounced up and down more like a schoolgirl than an executive. She could hardly contain her excitement.
Pride radiated from Jacob’s face, his eyes twinkled as he laughed.
“Just doing my job,” he winked.
“Well then, you’ve certainly impressed the boss.” Addison smiled then turned back toward the table. “While you’re here, let me introduce you to everyone. This is my mother, Annabelle, and my father, Bryce.”
Bryce stood and shook Jacob’s hand. Jacob’s face glazed over in a star-struck kind of way.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Reynolds.”
“The pleasure is all mine. You’ve certainly worked a miracle for my...,” he paused, “my daughter’s magazine,” he corrected himself with a nod to Addison.
“And this is my brother, Brad, and his girlfriend, Hanna,” Addison continued the introductions.
“Hi. Nice to meet you,” Jacob said.
“And hiding behind the centerpiece is my sister, Karsen. She’s going to start working with us next month.”