The Cost of Sugar

by Cynthia McLeod

  He came to realize more and more that he was falling in love with Mini-mini! The whole day long he could think of nothing else but her. Every minute that he was away from her he felt a kind of longing, a deep desire to be lying on the couch, feeling her caring fingers and hearing that dulcet voice. This was true love. He loved her dearly.

  It would have been easy for him to have taken her in his desire. He was, after all, her master. But that was something he didn’t want. His feelings for her were too deep, too sincere for him to misuse her in that way. He wanted her, oh how he wanted her, but not like that. No, she would have to give herself in love or not at all. And of course, her master’s feelings did not go unnoticed by Mini-mini, either. She, too, knew that he was far from indifferent to her: he was so good, so nice. But it was simply not in her nature to seduce a man, and in any case she was afraid, for what good would something like that do her.

  In the meantime Julius decided that it was time for his son Jethro, now five years old, to begin to learn to read and write. In the early evening he would therefore sit with Jethro and Mini-mini in his office and teach the boy numbers and the alphabet. Because Mini-mini was always there with him, she learned, too. When the two were together during the day, they practised together, sometimes outside with a stick in the sand, sometimes on a slate with a chalk pencil. Every evening the three sat there in the lamplight, and when Sarith on occasion walked past the office and looked in, she noticed that there was a certain something between those three there, something intimate, something between the three of them in which she had no part. Three dark heads bent over the table in the lamplight. She would hear Jethro cry, “O Mini-mini, your a’s look like tadpoles.”232 And Mini-mini would laugh and reply, with that soft voice of hers, “Those 2’s of yours look a bit like ducks.”233 And then came Julius’ voice, and the three of them bursting out laughing.

  Every afternoon Mini-mini massaged the masra, and every afternoon he had to work hard to restrain himself from taking her in his arms, kissing her and returning her fond caresses.

  Sarith had not been moaning any more about going to town. Perhaps she was ashamed about the child she was expecting? Or perhaps she realized that there was no money to be spent on all kinds of unnecessary purchases.

  The baby was born in April. In the middle of the night, during a heavy shower of rain, Mini-mini had to rush to the slave quarters to get women to help with the delivery. It was a girl, a stripling of a thing with a bald head. But when she opened her eyes for a second, they were blue. It was Mini-mini who went to the masra and insisted that he go to his wife. When he saw the child, he said only, “What’s her name?” Sarith had no name for her daughter, nor did Julius: he couldn’t care less what the child was called. So they decided to call her Eva.

  Was it the new baby that reminded Julius that afternoon that Mini-mini had also once had a baby? When she was massaging him that afternoon, Julius said, “Today I want to hear the story of Mini-mini.”234

  The girl thought he meant the tale that she had told before, the story of Koprokanu, and so she said, “But I’ve told the masra that tale so often.”235

  “No, not the tale of Koprokanu – your story, Mini-mini, about the child you once bore, about his father and who your man was.”236

  With that mellow voice of hers, Mini-mini then told of Hendrik and her, his promise to save to buy her freedom, how he had rejected her, preferring another, free, woman, and the child whose lot it was not to live. With a sigh she told how stupid she had been to have believed that a free man would take a slave-girl; she was a slave, not good enough for a free man. When she said this, and Julius saw the tears in those beautiful dark eyes, he could no longer control himself.

  He threw his arms around her and drew her towards him, whispering, “Never say that, Mini-mini. You’re the loveliest, the best, the best, believe me. The best man in all the world is not good enough for you. If I could do that for you, give you someone like that, then believe me I would do it.”

  He kissed her on her tearful eyes, then on her mouth, caressing her, holding her. And she? She returned his kisses and caresses, for she loved him, too, and she knew well that there was no evil lurking in this man, that he had only good intentions towards her. What both of them had so long felt coming on and what both had tried to avoid, now happened. They loved each other, and they confirmed that love then and there, on the couch in the office. After this first time, it would happen very often.

  Julius was totally besotted with Mini-mini. When she was massaging his back and he felt those fingers, the tender hands continually caressing him, he had the feeling that this was what he had been waiting for all his life. Every moment that he was not with her he was overwhelmed by an intense longing to run to her, throw his arms around her, hold her to him to be able to feel, stroke and caress her. He was almost jealous of Jethro because he could be with her nearly all the time, could sit on her lap and feel her arms around him. It was now so clear to Julius: he cared for no-one but her. He wanted to tell the whole world, shout it out loud: yes, he loved only Mini-mini.

  SARITH

  Sarith could survive no longer at Klein Paradijs. She had now been on the plantation for more than six consecutive months, for the first time since she was married. In the beginning the recent events, and especially the death of Rein Andersma, had cast their shadow over her such that amusement held no appeal forto her. She stayed in her room, thought things over a lot. She felt guilty that it was because of her that Rein was now dead. Often in the dead of night she would awake in terror, dreaming yet again of that ghastly day, shut up in the cupboard, that terrible Agosu pacing up and down in her room, and Rein lying dead in the passage. And then there was Julius. Julius, who was perhaps not angry any more, but just totally indifferent to her. She didn’t know which was worse. He gave her hardly a glance. Now and then they had visitors on the plantation, people travelling to plantations further afield who would stop awhile. Her mother had also come just after the birth and had stayed a few weeks there.

  She had also heard how Fourgeoud’s forces, reinforced by the Zwarte Jagers Corps, had combed the Cottica region and had managed to destroy some villages and crops that were still left. The Bonis had left for the other side of the Marowijne River and were now in French Guyana. The colonists breathed a sigh of relief. At last! Finally they were rid of that rabble in the bush. They now had nothing more to fear, and that expensive army could be got rid of, and quickly. Away with all those soldiers, officers and lieutenants who were costing them money and were furthermore getting off with their women.

  Julius never looked at the baby. It was Sarith’s child, not his. When Sarith said in the month of June that she wanted to go to the town for a while, he said, “Just go, I don’t care.”

  “I’ll take the child with me, and Nicolette.”

  Julius replied, “Please yourself.”

  And so Sarith left and installed herself again on the top floor of her sister’s house. Esther’s boys found the baby great. Sarith began to go out again, seeking amusement in evenings out and visits here and there. She did, however, notice that she was no longer invited by some people, and that some of the rich plantation owners were most decidedly no longer rich. But she noticed most of all how people were whispering about her. Often people would ask after her little daughter, Eva. Eva was growing, and hair was growing over that little bald head: blond hair, while in neither her family nor that of Julius had blond hair and blue eyes ever been seen. No, everything was different now, and when it was becoming so hot and dusty in the town at the end of September, Sarith decided to return to Klein Paradijs.

  When she arrived back home, she immediately noticed the intimacy between Julius, Jethro and Mini-mini. Jethro could already read quite well. He and Mini-mini would read happily together from a sheet on which Julius had written something, while he himself smiled along. One morning when Mini-mini was busy in Jethro’s room and Sarith came in, she suddenly realized: Mini-mini was pregnant. “Hey, Mini-m
ini, are you expecting?”237 asked Sarith in surprise.

  With some embarrassment, the girl answered, “Yes misi.”

  “Who, then – who is the father?”238 Sarith asked.

  Mini-mini hung her head and remained silent.

  “Who is the father – is it one of the slaves here?”239

  “No misi, misi doesn’t know him,”240 came the sheepish answer.

  Sarith assumed that it must anyway be one of the slaves, or a chance guest. Well, that Mini-mini – and she had always thought that she was so shy and withdrawing. She had obviously misjudged the girl.

  But Sarith noticed more during the weeks that followed. If she had already suspected that there was something between those three people, something from which she was excluded, now she saw how Julius looked at Mini-mini and she had also seen on occasion how Mini-mini had returned the look. Those were no glances between master and slave, but between two lovers. At first the thought scared her. No, that was not possible. That was nothing for Julius. But she began to observe more closely, and noticed especially that Julius was massaged every afternoon and that he and Mini-mini spent a long time in the office. That would always happen around siesta time, when Mini-mini had first sat next to Jethro’s bed with a fan, until he had fallen asleep.

  Sarith was angry. She wanted to know the details. She waited for her chance, a moment when Julius and Mini-mini were together in the office. She went to the door and turned the knob silently, but the door was locked. She tried looking through the keyhole, but the key was in it and she could see nothing. She just had to know, had to know what was happening in there.

  She left the rear veranda silently and walked round the house. On the side there was the open window of the office, but it was too high for her to look in. What now? Then, still making no sound, she went inside again and upstairs. The office was under a small room that was hardly ever used and where various baskets and boxes with clothes and all kinds of things were piled up. Sarith looked at the floor. Fortunately for her there was a chink here and there between the floorboards. Very carefully she lay down on the floor and put an eye to one of the gaps. She saw the two of them on the couch and knew enough: so what she had suspected was true. She kept on looking. This was no wild Julius taking advantage of a slave-girl. No, this was tender cuddling, caressing and loving whispers.

  Sarith was furious. That vile Mini-mini: just wait, she would get her. She said nothing about what she had seen, but waited until Julius was out inspecting the fields the next morning. Then she told Mini-mini that she must come to her room.

  “Who made you pregnant?”241 Sarith asked sharply.

  Mini-mini said nothing, looking sheepishly at the floor.

  “Tell me, who?”242 said Sarith calmly.

  Mini-mini still remained silent.

  “I don’t know him, eh? I obviously don’t know my own husband! Is it not Masra Julius who’s made you pregnant?”243 Sarith was raising her voice. Beside her on the table lay a flat stick that was used in coffee roasting. She grabbed it and it landed with a thump on Mini-mini’s shoulder, then in her face. But before Sarith could take a third swipe, a little figure flew at her and grabbed her hand.

  “Don’t hit Mini-mini, don’t hit Mini-mini!” It was Jethro.

  Sarith started in surprise, but recovered immediately and pushed the boy aside, shouting, “Scram, you!”

  Jethro landed against the wall, but bounced back like a ball, now pummelling his mother with his little fists, screaming, “Don’t hit her, don’t hit Mini-mini.” When he saw that his mother was going to continue anyway, he turned and threw himself against Mini-mini with both hands around her neck, so that his own body acted as a shield for her. Crying, he shouted, “Don’t hit her, don’t hit her.”

  Sarith shouted, “Get away, Jethro, let go. I’ll teach that bitch a lesson!”

  “She’s not a bitch, keep off her: you, you’re the bitch,” he screamed.

  Mini-mini, scared that Sarith would now even hit Jethro, wailed, “No Masra Jethro, oh no, look out, let go of me, let go!”244

  Sarith, who could not carry on with her beating, yelled at her child, “Let go, Jethro, or I’ll hit you, too!”

  “Stay away from her: I’ll tell my father, I’ll tell papa that you’ve hit Mini-mini!”

  Sarith, who realized that she could not carry on, shouted, “Be off with you, both of you, but you, you witch, I’ll get you.”245

  Sobbing, and with a wailing Jethro around her neck, Mini-mini went outside. There, Jethro said gently to her, “Come, Mini-mini, come with me: I’ll help you.” And in his room, like a little gentleman, he took a cup of coconut oil and began to smear the wounds with it. “Stay here, Mini-mini, I’ll look after you,” he said, and when, around midday, he heard the sound of horse’s hoofs, he ran to the rear veranda to wait for his father, and told him, flustered, that his mother had beaten Mini-mini.

  Julius went quickly to Jethro’s room. When he saw his distraught Mini-mini sitting there on the floor, he went and knelt by her, saying softly, “Mini-mini, how I wanted to spare you this. She knows, doesn’t she?”246 Mini-mini nodded. Julius went to his wife’s room, followed closely by Jethro, who perhaps didn’t know what was going to happen, but did realize that whatever it was, it was serious. “Mini-mini is pregnant and I’m the father: is that why you beat her?” Julius’ tone was measured.

  “Yes, I did,” said Sarith.

  “You, you of all people, you, vile whore that you are,” said Julius.

  “What? Am I supposed to accept this happening behind my back? Am I supposed to accept this?” Sarith began screaming and stamping.

  “Not behind your back; nothing’s happening behind your back. I love her and I want everyone to know it, do you hear?” Now Julius was yelling, too.

  “Well, keep your bit of fluff and your concubine somewhere else, then, but not in my house. I don’t have to take that lying down,” said Sarith.

  “Fine, fine, she’ll leave, but for the moment she’s staying here, and if you dare lay one finger on her, believe me, I’ll flog you ’til you drop! You’re warned!” Julius turned and left, again with Jethro, who had witnessed everything, following him.

  Sarith now began to think things over. “She’ll leave,” he had said. That meant that he would install her somewhere and then openly acknowledge her as his concubine. He would support her and her child, perhaps buy a house for her, have more children and be with her more and more. But then she, Sarith, had in fact lost out even more. They already had so little money, now that there was such a huge debt. How would it be if Mini-mini was his concubine in the near future? But Mini-mini was hers, she was her slave-girl. She must act, and act quickly. He must not succeed in making her his concubine. She would sell Mini-mini. At the end of the day she could do what she wanted with her property. But first she had to have the papers: the deeds of ownership that showed that Mini-mini was her property. If she asked him, he could refuse to give them to her or he might even give her the money himself. No, he must know nothing of this, must suspect nothing.

  The next day, Julius did not go out to the fields. Obviously he was frightened that something would happen in his absence. Sarith behaved normally, even nicely. Not even a comment when she caught Mini-mini spelling a word. Although Sarith had understood well enough that Mini-mini was learning to read, she had said nothing. Julius could not understand this pleasantness, and really didn’t trust this whole Sarith thing, but saw that even the next day she was being friendly, and spoke kindly to Mini-mini.

  Sarith asked for help with Eva now and then, because Mini-mini had so much more patience than Nicolette, and Eva was crying so much due to her cutting her teeth. Julius decided that Sarith had chosen to make the best of a bad job, and wasn’t so worried any more. He went out to the fields again the next day. The moment he was gone, Sarith went into the office, closed the door, and began to look for the papers.

  When, seven years earlier, she had come to live at Klein Paradijs, her step
father had given Kwasiba’s deeds of ownership to Julius. That was it! There was written that the slavegirl Kwasiba had been bought by Jacob A’haron, owner of the Bethel Plantation. At the foot of the sheet there was a note of the children born to this Kwasiba: Caro, born in 1747; Kwassi, born 1749, died 1749; Mini-mini, born 1750.

  She hid the paper in her room. For the rest, in the days that followed she was extra kind to Jethro and nice to Mini-mini, and went out of her way to talk to Julius. Then, one afternoon, she said that she would like to go to town in a few days’ time, but this time Jethro would have to go along, because she had promised Esther and Rebecca to bring him. They wanted to hold a party for all the family’s children, and Esther, especially, was of the opinion that Jethro should see more of his cousins now that he was older. Julius had no objections.

  “Of course, Mini-mini must come along in that case,” said Sarith. “Jethro can’t manage without her.”

  Me too, thought Julius, but he couldn’t say that, and said only, “Don’t make it too long, no more than a week. Jethro needs to carry on with his lessons.”

  Before lunch of the third day after that, Sarith had installed herself, with children and slave-girls, in the De Ledesmas’ home on the Saramaccastraat, and after the afternoon rest period she got ready to go out. She told no-one where she was going and took none of her own slave-girls with her, but one of her sister’s errand boys walked along behind her. At the stock exchange, where almost all the gentlemen gathered after the afternoon break and where the necessary negotiations, buying and selling took place, she sent the errand boy inside with the message that she wished to speak with Mr Beunekom. Ladies never entered the stock exchange.

  When Mr Beunekom came outside and found this lady waiting for him, the thought crossed his mind that it must be something serious to have brought her all this way just to speak to him. She told him that she had a slave-girl for sale: an expensive one, a mulatto. Beunekom would have to collect her himself that same evening, from the Saramaccastraat. The price was not relevant: Beunekom could fix that himself.